#1147 – The Expat Files: Motorcycles, Manana Time, and Water Wisdom

Automatically transcribed from the original recording; names and wording may contain errors.

[00:00] South of the border, down Mexico way That's where I fell in love when the stars above came out to play and now I wonder Hello there all you expat wannabes. I'm Johnny Mueller and you're listening to the expat files living in Latin America The show that tells you just what it's like to live work play and or retire down here in Latin America It's a mix of the good the bad the ugly and the great and it's all right here. So let's get started Let's start with an interesting boots on the ground story. At least it was interesting for me Recently, I was stuck in a layover situation at the Panama Airport The main one the big one took him on I ended up sitting next to this guy the same guy for around two and a half hours

[00:45] So obviously we started talking it turns out he wasn't hanging out on a layover. He'd missed his flight He was a local guy a Panamanian who'd missed his flight because of some big traffic accident He said there was a huge bottleneck on one of the major highways and he got stuck right in the middle of it It seems a big container truck lost control and flipped when a motorcycle made a crazy move and got caught under his wheels Naturally, the guy sitting next to me was more than pissed off missing his flight And he had to wait eight more hours to get another one He was on his way to Madrid. So what do you think we mostly talked about? How about those crazy ass motorcycles the kooka-ratches of the road? Everyone who's got a car here in Latin America suffers for that. Anyway, so we're sitting there talking then we started telling our own personal stories I told him that I'd hit two motorcycles wiped him out completely

[01:32] I told him how in the first instance one Motorcyclist cut across three lanes of traffic at once and I whacked him My second crash was with a motorcyclist was going the wrong way down a one-way street Then that guy told me he'd nailed two motorcyclists too One was a guy who ran a red light and another one who ran a four-way stop sign Then I asked the million-dollar question. Did you stop or did you keep on going? Because you know if you ask a Latin lawyer, he'll tell you to stop but unofficially He'll say with the nod and a wink because of the legalities of the situation and the fact that the Motorcyclists will almost always end up in the hospital. You'd be a lot better off to just keep on going In other words, do what I say, not what I do or is it do what I do? Not what I say Hmm. Anyway, I asked a guy did you stop or did you keep on going?

[02:20] He said I stopped because I'm an emergency room trauma physician. I said is that right? Well, then you must have lots of mixed feelings about these motorcycle cooker atchards. He said that's an understatement I see those guys every day and in the worst condition too In fact on some weekends half of my emergency room is filled with motorcycle trauma victims And their injuries are almost never good Then I said there's got to be a way to get these fools off the road or somehow get them to obey the rules Too bad. They just can be outright banned completely. That's what I said to him I was a bit surprised when the guy shook his head and said I'm not so sure about that. It's complicated I said, what do you mean? He said think about the secondary effects of banning them

[03:06] Have you considered they're a driving force behind the lower and middle classes? They're sort of an engine for that part of the economy He said much like in the old days what a horse was for a cowboy I said you got that right those guys are cowboys now what the trauma doc said next I never thought about before he said did you know in developing countries more than half of all the organs for transplant? Come from motorcycle accident victims at least that's true of the chain of hospitals. I work at he said I said really that's very interesting and maybe in Latin America. That's a hundred percent true But have you heard of what they're doing to the Urdu population in China the default organ donors over there He didn't know what I was talking about so I had to explain it to funny

[03:52] How even professional guys with doctorates down here at Latin America often have very superficial knowledge about what's happening in the rest of the world They're very good at their particular specialty, but have a sort of tunnel vision in regards to anything that's outside their sphere Hmm sound familiar? Anyway, then I said think of all the positive things that would happen though if there were no more Parasitic motorcyclists on the road or at least we could somehow get him to obey all the transit rules They'd still swarm like kookarotches But we as car drivers wouldn't have to be on the defensive all the time besides that your emergency rooms Like you said would be half full nicer less hectic less chaotic places for sure What's not to like about that? Then he smiled and said yeah But then I might just be out of a job only also confirmed the fact that almost no

[04:42] Motorcyclists who come through the emergency room have any kind of insurance at all neither private health insurance nor vehicle insurance Even though motorcycle insurance is mandatory in almost every single Latin American country It just doesn't matter to the kookarotches of the road even though get this full coverage Motorcycle insurance costs around four dollars a month So I asked him about those motorcycle fools coming through the emergency room without insurance. I said, what do you do with them? He said we have to treat them Hippocratic oath and all that by the way We also got into a discussion about how we're seeing more and more motorcycles that are electric sort of a bright spot on the horizon Anyway, they're coming. All right slowly, but surely and it's a blessing really two big advantages You know, they're completely silent and they put out no clouds or puffs of smoke

[05:31] Now if only Latin American countries were smart enough to put an import limit or a deadline limit by a certain year No more gas-powered motorcycles. Wouldn't that be a treat? All countries will eventually do that, you know But we've got this persistent chronic disease called manana time In fact, many Latin American countries now are switching over to completely electric public transportation Now I know it's hard to imagine an electric chicken bus, but it's in the works and it will happen time will tell Oh and one more thing an important thing about vehicle electrification here in Latin America Another good point the doc brought up in our long discussion waiting for flights at the Panama Airport He said I'll bet anything Stealing electric power and hacking power poles will be the new national sport once the switchover comes to electric motorcycles

[06:20] Just remember he said upper middle class and wealthy folks don't have motorcycles It's the middle and lower classes that own 99% of them the people making minimum wage living from day to day Believe me He said they'll be gray and black market and midnight Electrical charging stations popping up all over the place you watch So we've got that to look forward to an unintended secondary effect Alright yank in the wheel of it as if you need another reason to have a plan B and get the hell out of dodge I'm looking at this article just came out today from the perennially woke and disgusting Los Angeles Times A national paper that's only second best as a kitty litter liner slash dog poop bladder to the New York Times You know the New York Times, don't you? It's New York's communist left-wing

[07:06] LGBT WTF woke fake news newspaper rag of record and that's just the sports section anyway in the LA Times the headline says there will be patrols and fines as Southern California water restrictions start rolling out It says as the metropolitan water district of Southern California announced its harshest ever water Restrictions for millions of residents the rules will kick in on June 1st 2022 less than a month away It goes on to say the goal of the state water district is to try to shrink usage to about 80 gallons of water per person per day right now it says the average Californian uses a hundred and seventy gallons per day with the three worst Districts in California on average their residential customers use approximately

[07:54] 227 gallons of water per day with the average around 125 gallons per person per day in the rest of the United States Hmm, isn't it odd that in Latin America the average water use per person per day is 25 gallons About a quarter of the average per person daily use up in the states The article says one of the major problems for such high usage. That's for people in California anyway People love lush lawns and gardens and some people like to leave their sprinklers on all night Turns out in most of the rest of the United States There's much less water usage because during the winter time no one waters their lawn in California It's all year round. So the average daily usage per person in California is almost double the national average So how does that compare with Latin America?

[08:40] I think you know from what I can see down here in Latin America Anyway, only wealthy people have sprinklers on their lawns and the ones that do rarely leave them on all night Even though there is no winter freeze and the grass and gardens grow all year round still people just don't squander water The people don't but Latin governments sure do we'll get to that in a second So you wonder how they're gonna roll out that plan in California Well first, they're gonna divvy up watering days among even an odd number addresses Then they'll be sending patrols through the area to take photos and videos and knock on doors making sure people are complying those patrols will be looking for sprinkler use and waste such as get this water that's flowing into gutters Obviously in California, it must be illegal for you to use water that ends up in your gutter

[09:27] It says residents who are not complying will be given door tag warnings for the first offense and then be monitored Heavily after that with penalties and fines escalating greatly from there It says homes that are not in compliance will have water restriction valves and devices installed Yes, the change will likely be sobering for many millions of people it says that you think so there you have it reason 4456 why it's time to get that plan B and high gear and get the hell out of Dodge Or at least have one foot planted in your favorite Latin American country Because everyone needs an escape hatch and if you don't believe that then why in the hell are you listening to this show? Now about the water situation here in Latin America now, you may have read here and there that there are droughts Yep, of course, there are droughts. There are always droughts everywhere in the world. There's plenty of droughts here in Latin America, too

[10:17] It's nothing new you can go back in the archives of all the national Periodicals and newspapers and you'll see photos of crop failures and baked soil as well as floods in the rainy season Going back hundreds of years droughts and floods droughts and floods as part of living here in Latin America Now you have to be down here to see it from yourself But when you go to one of these big fruit and vegetable markets They just have an amazing assortment and quantity of food The question is then if you're reading about droughts all the time How come the markets are so jam-packed with food that inevitably there's lots of spoilage? I don't get it somehow the propaganda doesn't fit the reality and the floods Yeah, Latin American farmers have been dealing with those for hundreds of years too when the rainy season comes in that last six months There's so much water

[11:02] If you collected just a tenth of what hits your roof during that rainy season and could store it in your own big sister in Which I highly recommend you'd never have to hook up to a municipal water supply or even have your own private well Oh and as far as having private wells here in Latin America if you live out the boonies you're gonna want one Then of course, you'll never run out of water You can collect your own rainwater too and store it in a cistern if you like and you're doubly prepared You'll never be without water. By the way, if you've got your own private well, it's called a posso down here posso The only way it won't produce water is if the electricity goes out because the pump is electric By the way, all the big high-end subdivisions gated guarded communities and residential towers have their own well So they don't count on municipal water for anything. They're not even hooked up to it

[11:48] Which is why they have water 24-7 and the big piece of misinformation I hear this all the time is when gringles and expats visit a latino's house They ask him about that big plastic cistern that's usually on the roof and they say what's that for? well the owner says that's because you only got water 10 or 12 hours a day and That tank up on the roof collects water at night So that in the morning when the water cuts out or just starts to trickle the pump for the cistern kicks in and we've got Water all the time even when there's no pressure in the municipal lines And you know what when gringles and expats first hear that it scares them Why wouldn't it up in the states? We've got water coming at us 24-7 other municipal pipes Why would I want to live in a place where you only get water for half the day? And you've got to buy one of these crazy cisterns and pumps so you're not a convenience

[12:35] Gringos are also thinking what happens if it's only on four hours a day Well, as I've said before people who've got cisterns on the roof. They're on a municipal water supply They're counting on city water, which you really can't count on because it's run by the government. What else is new? Not to mention every city water workers Well, tell you that at least half of the water supply coming out of the mains is lost underground due to old pipe leaks cracks And bad joints in fact on any given day of the week You could drive through a medium or large Latin City and see a spot where water is just coming out of a manhole cover You'll see the occasional dirt patches and city lots that are saturated with water as well If you walk on that land, it's spongy because an underground tubes been leaking for so long Sometimes those leaks remain unrepaired for weeks even months at a time

[13:24] Then again, that's what you get when lard ass government slugs. Are there any other kind are put in charge of the utilities? right now let's talk about planting a Second flag getting a second nationality a second citizenship with a passport That should be an end goal for everyone out there who's got a plan B gives you a lot more flexibility in the world For example, if the shit hits the fan in your country the US or Canada and the government starts restricting travel and movement You know, they've had a lot of practice with that Covid it crap That's when a second passport could come in really handy could even be a lifesaver by the way that US passport man It's not as good as you think it is For example, you could be stuck in a situation like my friend Jeffrey was very tense, but he did play it cool He was in Karachi Pakistan the largest city and capital of the country on the business trip. He's a clothing manufacturer

[14:15] He was out in the boonies on a weekend. Just taking pictures of the local sites and some ancient ruins Oh, and he was all alone to suddenly a Jeep pulled up four guys with guns wearing turbans jumped out One guy pointed his ak-47 at Jeffrey and said you American and he said nope Canadian and he pulled out his Canadian password You see Jeffrey was a dual citizen US and Canada and had both passports on him Luckily, he was quick-thinking in the moment and pulled out his Canadian one. They looked at it said, okay and took off now admittedly That's sort of an extreme case but things like that do happen Remember if there's ever a hijacking of a boat or a plane and you're on board Who do you think's going overboard or out the window the guy with the US passport or the Israeli passport?

[15:03] Not the guy from Mexico Guatemala or Peru Since our theme has always been Latin America The question is which Latin American countries recognized dual citizenship and what are the restrictions? If any because you know There are some countries in the world a few in Latin America to who do not allow you to have dual citizenship You have to renounce one to get the other all right Let's talk about some countries that do allow it starting with Mexico if you've been a legal resident in Mexico for more than five Years, you're eligible to apply for a Mexican nationality and passport though to do So you must also prove you have a good understanding of Spanish and the Mexican culture and take a test submitted by the SRE the secretaria There were last year on his exterior is by the way If you fail that test you can wait 10 days to take it again

[15:50] If you fail again, you have to wait a whole year, but you can't take it again Though being that this is Latin America. There are ways to bone up or hack that test through Intermediaries if you know what I mean, in other words ways to grease the skids anyway for Mexican Residency right now permanent residency that is you must show that you have saved a minimum of 27,000 bucks in the past year or that you get a regular monthly income from outside of Mexico of at least 620 bucks a month and if you're applying for permanent residency based on your ownership of real estate in Mexico You have to prove that it's worth at least 216,000 bucks, so then what does a Mexican passport get you as far as travel? Well, it won't get you travel to the US or Canada But you can't go to places restricted by your US passport like Cuba by the way if you're the traveling sort of person

[16:38] I do recommend you hit Cuba at least once in your life and don't do just the tourist spots in Havana and Vardadero, that's the Beach District get out to the boonies the small towns talk to the people That is if you can get the people to talk because freedom of speech that is freedom of speech to criticize your government is prohibited They'll punish you for it now if you do get him to talk openly you'll find out soon enough why socialism is a terrible system funny thing to a lot of people up in the states who've never been to Cuba say the reason why Cuba is so poor and undeveloped is because of the gringo sanctions have been going on since the early 60s if that's true Then Cubans should have a natural inbred dislike or even hatred for gringos wouldn't they if that is they believe the propaganda Coming both out of the US and Cuba

[17:23] Well surprise surprise you visit Cuban you'll find they just love gringos there seems like everyone's got a Cuban relative cousin Aunt uncle whatever up in the states sending back a hundred or two a month remisses In fact, I've never met a single Cuban who didn't want to live in the states But I digress anyway if you get Mexican citizenship a Mexican passport Guess what your kids can study in Mexican public schools and you'll be eligible to enroll in Mexico's medieval National health care system hooray All right, let's talk about Colombia after you've had residency in Colombia for five years You can apply for Colombian nationality and passport That's cut down to two years if you're married to a Colombian that Residency thing leading to passport is a little bit different in Colombia

[18:10] You have to get your temporary residency first which costs around 650 bucks There are no other monthly income requirements And you hold that for five years and it switches automatically to permanent residency Which you hold for five years then you can go for nationality and passport It takes about ten years now to go directly to permanent residency and then it's only five years to nationality and passport You can do that by investing about a hundred and sixty five thousand dollars in approved real estate deal Then you go immediately to a permanent residency in five years after that you can apply for nationality and passport That's Colombia as for Panama you can get citizenship after five years as a Panama resident, too But no to get that residency one way is by opening up a Panama company that actually does business

[18:57] So you'll have to have a real legit business not just an SAA or LLC company It has to have employees and file taxes the big problem with getting a Panama visa You see is they got rid of on August 5th 2021 almost a year ago now The fast-track version of the friendly nation's visa now, it's mighty tough It ain't fast-track no more to get that visa You have to get employment at a Panamanian company could be your own company But you have to have an actual job in Panama or purchase real estate worth at least 200 grand Or deposit two hundred thousand dollars in a three-year CD earning 3.5 percent interest at a Panama bank So in effect the new friendly nation's visa rules are not so friendly at all Besides that even if you get that visa you get a temporary one for two years and then it switches to permanent and you'll have

[19:47] To have that for five years or a total of seven before you can apply for nationality and passport Now as for Costa Rica, you can get a legal second passport there after becoming a legal permanent resident But you're required to live in that country for a continuous seven years to qualify for that passport pretty tough to do Now as for the Dominican Republic It seems to be a lot easier than a lot of Latin American countries to get naturalization and passport For example to qualify you have to be a legal resident in the country for only two years or better yet If you've been granted residency by investment investing in real estate, whatever and that's generally a minimum investment of two hundred thousand You only have to wait six months to apply for Dominican nationality and a passport By the way, the DR's tax system is most attractive

[20:34] No wealth tax gift tax inheritance tax or an income tax or capital gains tax So you only have to pay personal income tax if you reside there and make your money there Oh, and by the way, as far as real estate How about this in the DR you're exempt from property tax on the first hundred thousand dollars of a real estate purchase It could be your home business. Whatever. Alright, how about Peru? Peru like the previously mentioned countries also allows dual citizenship Once you get permanent legal residency You have to be in the country for two years and then you could apply for the passport To get residency you have to prove a permanent outside monthly income of at least a thousand bucks a month Or you could get an investment visa, but you have to fork out at least a hundred and fifty thousand bucks on and

[21:19] Approved and I don't like that word approved investment or a real estate deal used to be only 30 grand But they changed that rule just recently But I'll tell you what I really don't like about Peru and I've been there All resident gringos and expats there have to pay income tax on any money They've earned worldwide just like lemmings in the US However, non-residents in Peru are only taxed on the income they earned there in Peru Totally as and there are currently two tax brackets in Peru 15% for annual income up to around $13,000 and after that it's 30% if you make over and above 13k Where's yet the VAT tax which is basically like the state tax in the United States is at 18% Nope for those reasons and a couple of more I wouldn't want to live permanently in Peru nice place to visit they've got Machu Picchu and all that

[22:08] But I wouldn't want to live there now Brazil also offers dual citizenship With the minimum time required to have a residency and be able to apply five years To get your permanent residency in Brazil you have to prove that you have an outside income of at least 1700 bucks a month and be over 60 Problem is it's very difficult to get residency if you're under 60 unless you're married to a Brazilian You'll have to start a business produce a business plan It must show that you'll employ at least two Brazilians and you'll have to invest at least 100,000 bucks in that business. It can't be a house or real estate Anyway, I heard from other gringos down there that it's very difficult to get that kind of visa Besides that Brazil is known for being one of the most difficult countries in the world to do business in There's just so much bureaucracy red tape and under the counter payoffs

[22:56] Gringos tell me down there almost no gringo expats open businesses legally They've got an online business, but they don't have to be registered Seems everyone I know in business in Brazil wants to be off the grid or is off the grid But they do allow for dual citizenship But honestly the only gringos I know in brazil who have brazilian passports are the ones that married brazilians Any other way they say it's just too much red tape So anyway, those are the major countries in latin america that allow dual citizenship In other words, you keep your u.s passport too. So then what about the other latin american countries? The ones not mentioned. Well, most of the other ones the ones we're interested in anyway Appear not to allow dual citizenship, but they do so in a roundabout way. For example, take guatemala After five years of permanent residency, you can apply for a nationality and passport

[23:43] But when you stand in front of the judge in the court and swear your oath to the country of guatemala In that oath, you must state that you renounce all other passports and nationalities you might have but here's the catch It's just in that oath. It's not binding The fact is you could go into a foreign court and swear all day long that you're renouncing or giving up your u.s passport and citizenship But it doesn't mean a thing. It's not binding as you might know It's a long drawn-out process to renounce your u.s citizenship plus you have to pay an exit tax And you'll have to go through a couple of interviews at the embassy So the end game is if you're in line to get a passport from another country and when you're in court And you pledge the oath to your new country if you're forced to say because the oath demands it That you're giving up your previous passports and nationalities. It's just non-enforceable non-binding rhetoric

[24:34] You know earlier we were talking about mexico, right? Well, there's a huge housing bubble going on there, especially in the gringoized areas And people living there are at odds and it's how and when it's going to pop Now, of course, if you're living up in the states You're reading stuff in the paper from so-called analysts that are highlighting the fact that homes in mexico Are much more affordable than in markets like the u.s. Canada or the european union and that loans are fairly easy to come by now Well, here's the truth If you want to live how the locals live you want to live in a barrio. Sure Houses especially riddles are cheap Compared to the us and the rest of the first world That is if you don't mind the sound and pollution of chicken buses and people hawking goods at the top of their lungs and roosters Crowing at all hours not to mention your water being cut off a couple hours a day

[25:21] While it's true that several banks even state-run organizations are offering easy lines of credit for locals and sometimes for gringles and expats The interest on those loans is extremely high For example, the average interest rate starts at roughly 12 and a half percent That's the best preferred client rate you can get and you'll need 20 even 30 percent down Now there's this agency called info navid. I nfo navit. That's the government-run housing loan agency And if you ever saw the place and what it takes to get a loan, you'd see there's mind-numbing bureaucracy But latinos, you know are used to it You know the old joke when latinos see a line forming they automatically get in it Whether they need to or not. Here's the thing though if you talk to builders and developers in mexico

[26:07] They're particularly concentrating on high-end apartments in new mid and high-range condo towers There's no dough and low-income housing and those projects aren't cheap by any standards For example in high-rise condos where gringo tourism is prevalent It's not unusual to find prices ranging roughly from six million pesos or nearly three hundred thousand us dollars for a single bedroom unit To over 11 million pesos for a two-bedroom unit. That's over a half million bucks similarly prices during the last 10 years in mexico real estate prices that is have risen around 300 percent Yep, even in the scruffy neighborhoods the barrios. So then where is this all leading to? Well, let's put it this way people just aren't scared enough for what's coming next my friends

[26:55] I'm talking about a worldwide blowout Can't you see it's coming and finally today on a lighter note? Here's an email from cali says johnny You may have coined the word gringo advantage, but here's my definition of it I've been living in guadamala now for three years. My latino wife is beautiful a head turner intelligent fun Hard working and motivated and has this horrible taste in men I'm a lottery winner. That's what the gringo advantage did for me And to think it took six months of boots on the ground before I even realized I had it You've been listening to the expat files living in latin america If you need some help with your own plan b we can schedule a one-on-one phone or skype consult Just send me an email the expat files at gmail.com

[27:43] And if you want to get on the waiting list for my next week-long expat insider seminar in central america Where you're guaranteed to get a two to five year head start on your plan b Send me an email the expat files at gmail.com