#607 – The Expat Files: Life in Latin America, Politics, and Natural Disasters

Automatically transcribed from the original recording; names and wording may contain errors.

[00:00] South of the border down Mexico way That's where I fell in love when the stars above came up to play and now I wonder Hello there all you expat wannabes. I'm Johnny Mueller and you're listening to the expat files living in Latin America The show that tells you just what it's like to live work play and or retire down here in Latin America It's a mix of the good the bad the ugly and the great and it's all right here. So let's get started Okay, just a quick announcement before we get going in two days That will be the first of November my early bird discount offer for my January 2017 expat insider seminar Expires so you have two days from the time this show goes out on Sunday, October 3rd to get in on the deal

[00:50] So what's it all about? If you go to www.the new expat comm and click on Johnny's January 2017 seminar link You'll see the prices there reflect the early bird discount and the regular prices will come into effect later this week And yes, even though the seminars more than two months away and it's more than three quarters filled already There are a few spots left and you can still get in with that early bird discount And by the way I mentioned in a previous show that a lot of people come down as singles and they mentioned they don't mind having a roommate and if that happens, they know they can get another five hundred dollar discount because with a roommate it's double occupancy and Generally, that's possible effect in this seminar the upcoming one. I've already hooked up for people that way Of course, they don't know each other

[01:36] So what I do first is hook them up by email and then they Skype and see if they're compatible and generally it works out Fine. So there you have it some more news about the upcoming seminar Okay, now let's talk a little bit about Nicaragua Which seems to be along with Colombia every expat bloggers idea of the next Costa Rica Of course, if you've ever been to Costa Rica, you'd know that's actually sort of a curse Does sound good in print and in blogs though because you know Costa Rica is every first world Americans idea of a great balmy south of the border Latin American vacation Destination and it is a nice vacation spot, but I wouldn't want to live there And how do I know that because I did live there. All right, then so what about Costa Rica's northern neighbor Nicaragua?

[02:24] You might not know it, but this is the presidential election season and Ortega is gonna win Of course, he's a dictator And if you think he isn't a dictator, then how would he have the power to ban 28 congressmen from seeking reelection? He just decreed they weren't eligible and get this they were all from his opposition the independent liberal party He even banned the opposing presidential candidate from running. The guy's name is Eduardo Montallegre So it's a done deal Ortega is gonna win again By the way, his party changed the constitution too, so he can run indefinitely without term limits He's a dictator. No doubt though. He doesn't rule with a hard fist He's a soft-handed dictator because there's a lot of money flowing into Nicaragua And he and his family and all his relatives are multi-millionaires now

[03:09] However, that overflowing public trough is about to come to an end You know looks like the good times are over even though according to government figures. Yeah, right. Don't you just love government figures? anyway, recent Nicaraguan government figures are saying poverty has dropped from 42.5 percent in 2009 to 30 percent in 2015. Yeah, you got to love those poverty statistics What they call poverty in the states is solid if not upper middle class down here Meanwhile what they call poverty here in latin america is solid middle class in africa By the way, what they call middle class in the united kingdom is white trash poor in the states Hmm who to believe who to believe huh? Oh, and by the way I always love the official government statistics on employment and unemployment in latin countries in Nicaragua

[03:59] They say it's 6.8 percent But how could they even measure it to tenths of a percent for that matter? How could they even measure it accurately at all since it's estimated by outsiders not government statistics That 40 percent of the people in nicaragua work off the books Have no receipts pay no taxes and it's all cash. Hey, i'm not putting it down You gotta love it sure keeps the government's fingers out of your pocket And by the way, you know that every latin country has a national health care system It's basically free for all nationals and residents Of course, remember it's a terribly chaotic broken down medieval system But still it's free and local latins use it a lot Just walk into a public hospital emergency room and you'll see and smell what I mean

[04:45] Like expat eddie says and he's always good to turn a phrase It's a fine mixture of blood sweat and tears with more than a hint of pee poop and vomit Now it's not to say that latin's love or even like that system, but it's free, you know They've come to depend on it and look at it as a civil right So what if doctors don't have gloves or disposables even electricity or running water sometimes? Anyway in order to get free treatment at one of these public hospitals get this You have to be registered in the government social security system Which means you have to have a job on the books And if you do the government takes a portion out of your check each month Just like they do in the states for social security and fica medicare medicaid and all that Otherwise if you're not registered with a job in the system and haven't been paying in

[05:34] You actually get billed when you go to one of those public hospitals, of course It's very cheap, but you still get billed So in effect that 40 of nickerad ones who are working off the books don't have free health care at all However, and you'll find this out if you live in a latin country If you try to take for example, your cleaning lady your maintenance guy The guy selling pirated cds or your builder and you say to him or her i'll tell you what from now on We'll put you on the books. I'll pay you buy check Hook you up with the country's social security and pension system and that way you'll have free health care How about that? By the way, all latin countries have the equivalent of a social security pension system But you have to pay in though. The average payout is anywhere from 50 to 100 bucks a month Anyway, when you present that argument to your workers or anyone who's off the books

[06:24] They always kind of chuckle they answer quickly almost too quickly saying no. Thanks I'd much rather have the cash because of two things really number one. They're all living on the edge And secondly, they know from experience any money taken out of their check, even if it's only three four five percent We'll just go to a useless corrupt government system and they have no illusions that they won't get ripped off somehow in the end Hmm sound familiar By the way Not all gringos and expats who live in latin america Are the kind of people you want to hang with or even be friends with in fact not so long ago I was close to the gringo tourist trail and I ran into some expat gringos Who asked me that loaded question who you're going to vote for? Then I found out these guys belong to republicans and democrats abroad and my first thought what a bunch of lame-brained idiots

[07:13] I thought what are they doing down here? They should be up in the states kissing the asses of their corrupt heroes not spreading that toxic Political excrement down here in latin america. We don't need that But that's what happens as you get closer to the gringo tourist trail You meet more and more first world lemmings who've been brainwashed Then you ask them why they're down here and you find out they left the states because they can't live a first world life On their social worker pension school counselor pension military pension teachers or whatever pension And they all want more from the government and most of them were pissed off when bernie sanders dropped out And the thing is, you know when you meet Opinionated dunderheaded gringos with incomplete educations like that You find out that so many of them had government jobs back in the states or work for ngo's

[08:01] And their most frequent past occupation up in the states. You'll never guess public school teacher Hey, now doesn't that follow a pattern, huh? And like I said when I run into gringos these days They always ask that same question who are you gonna vote for with more than half of them saying? I hope it's not trump And occasionally i'll reply by saying i'll vote for anyone who abolishes the irs the federal reserve a guy who closed out all 300 foreign military bases put us back on the gold standard enforce one year congressional term limits and make the job of congressional lobbyist illegal But that's never going to happen Which is why I voted with my feet and why you should too In fact, the last guy I voted for was ross pro, you know The guy that was right when he said you'll hear that big sucking sound of jobs leave in america

[08:50] But I digress as usual. We're talking about ortega and nikaragua in the next costa rica, right? well According to people in the know that is not the media but people actually living in nikaragua Those great economic conditions and inflows of foreign money that allowed ortega a self-professed Socialists to play populist and even democratic and of course you get elected in latin america by handing out freebies to the poor Right before the election, you know that trick. Anyway in the new year nikaragua will be facing serious economic trouble. Why? Because for one thing venezuela, which is a terrific basket case, you know They were selling nikaragua oil way under market price A deal that venezuela's hugo shaves made with them a long time ago. And now it's about to expire

[09:37] In fact nikaragua now owes venezuela 3.5 billion dollars and venezuela's pressing for it because they're dead broke Okay, so that's one shadow looming in the new year. How about this one? The expected 50 billion dollar plus investment in the proposed nikaraguan canal will never materialize Being that it's chinese backer lost 80 percent of his wealth in the market last year Well, I warned you about that one even three and four years ago, didn't I by the way If you're driving around nikaragua this month You'll see that all the little stores have the traditional red and black sandinista flag hanging, you know It's election time and you got to have that stuff But the truth is all the locals remember what ortega was a sandinista gorilla And they feel they have to fly it or else most will tell you they don't support the guy

[10:27] They just feel it's better to keep it flying, you know Those little guys eking out a living certainly don't want to get on any dictator's feces list now, do they? So there's a little tidbit for all you expat gunnabees and wannabees who are thinking about nikaragua as your plan b destination So it looks like soon there will have the end of the good times and the economy is poised to take a serious dump That coupled with the fact that ortega is a socialist and he's planning on staying in power indefinitely Well, I wouldn't want to be a gringo or expat living under those circumstances, but that's just me Oh, and by the way, did you know that ortega the president of nikaragua just had a meeting with putin and some of his delegates By the way ortega addresses putin as brother president Anyway, they're in discussions right now about establishing a russian base in nikaragua

[11:16] How about that? In fact, they signed a short-term agreement that allows russian military formations ships and aircraft to visit and dock at nikaraguan ports as part of an ongoing training program, whatever that is and you know Oddly enough all of nikaraguas latin neighbors Honduras, guatemala, belize, soledore and Castorica as canadians would say they're not really saying much They don't seem to look at this as a threat because you know latin countries traditionally being so poor and their leaders so corrupt They'll take the money and the help and the bribes and the loans from anyone who'll give it to them Oh, and by the way with the idea that russian can bring military formation ships and aircraft now to nikaragua The us is definitely going to want a presence in that country and it'll be monitoring and spying

[12:04] It will be spy versus spy, you know, and that in the end will make nikaragua a strategic hotspot Don't like that at all Which is another reason I don't like to recommend nikaragua anymore as a good plan bx pet destination Just too many wild cards there for me. Now, you know, i'm not knocking putin I think he's a thousand times better leader than the bushes clinton's and ovomits combined It's just that when any powerful country starts putting bases around the world like those malignant Pusbrained idiots in the u.s. Government they disrupt and dislocate all the normal life around them I mean just ask anyone who's ever lived close to a town with a big military base Okay, enough said about that. Let's move on You know, I continuously get emails from people asking me about natural disasters like earthquakes hurricanes

[12:51] And volcanoes as if you don't get your share of natural disasters up north, right? So let's start out by saying that some of latin america is in a hurricane corridor At least the caribbean coastal side of central america oddly enough hurricanes seem to lose their steam completely when traveling south of panama So columbia, which is immediately south might get a little blowback in some bad weather But they almost never get nailed by a full force hurricane That includes all the countries with the south atlantic coastal region like uruguay brazil, argentine, etc Sure, they get some bad weather, but almost never a full force hurricane And strangely enough on the pacific side you do get some hurricanes

[13:36] Although those hurricanes which are less frequent than the caribbean or atlantic ones almost always seem to hit mexico Almost never swinging far south then hitting the pacific side of guatemala or el solvador for example with full force Although they can get some pretty nasty storms The true hurricane corridor in central america is on the atlantic or caribbean side And the truth is if you live a hundred kilometers or so from the atlantic or pacific coast even if a hurricane hits Oh, you'll get some bad weather for a few days, but you won't have broken windows and your roof will stay on Unlike those who live directly on the coast or five or ten kilometers from it. Sometimes they'll get hit and hit hard So then how about volcanoes and earthquakes? Yep, oh you gonna bees wanna bees and all of us ex-pats have to live with those

[14:23] That's the way it is And you know when friends and family come down from the states to visit us short and long-term expats They all seem to want to get up close and personal with an active volcano Kind of i've had first world visitors express that desire many times In fact right now from where i'm doing this show I could get in my car and drive maybe 20 minutes and see an active volcano far in the distance blowing little plumes of smoke In fact down here in latin america It's very desirable in a real estate sense to have a nice view of an active or inactive volcano from your own property Thus unobstructed views of volcanoes active or not bring higher land prices Of course, you don't want to be too close unless the volcano is dormant and has been throughout recorded history

[15:10] Even so you're never a hundred percent certain it won't blow With that I should mention that I know a gringo who's quite well off Who's just obsessed with volcanoes and built his house at the base of a dormant one It's a beautiful place with a fantastic view But what he didn't count on was the severity of the rainy season He lived there a few years. Everything was fine. He loved it in fact, but then there came a particularly severe rainy season And you know pure volcanic soil is different from other soils It's rather loose and crumbly and doesn't pack easily It's not like clay or some of the other dense soils you're used to up in the states And that year his whole backyard got hit with a mudslide An ugly mess that destroyed his beautiful garden and landscaping and cracked his pool

[15:55] So yes, he has a tremendous view but he paid for it Twice and later he had to bring an earth mover in to resculpt his land and build a retaining wall But still he's happy as a clam and glad he owns that property For one thing he says he never would have been able to get a permit to build such a place up in the states Which brings us to another point You can buy and build on land down here in latin america that you'd never be able to get a permit for up in And do note that very few places in latin america that is Municipalities or environmental studies groups can even tell you what the 50 or 100 year floodplain is So you'll have to do your own homework on that However, what's nice about living in the altiplano is that you're already four five six thousand feet above sea level and the drainage is

[16:43] Absolutely great unless you're situated in some kind of hollowed out bowl or convergence of weird angles But if you do end up building or buying in the altiplano, which long time listeners will know that's my favorite place in most regions There'll be no such thing as a hundred year floodplain because the drainage is always looking to rush to sea level That said once again i'll repeat I don't recommend you live within 10 miles of an active volcano even 15 miles for good measure Of course, you've all probably seen on national geographic and the nature channel some of those deadly Pyroclastic clouds that sometimes explode from volcanoes the ones that suffocate and kill everything as they roll through That and lava are what people will remember about volcanoes the two things

[17:29] They're afraid of when they come down here and see volcanoes, especially when people are living near them So with all the hundreds of active volcanoes in latin america, should you be worried? Well, for one thing most active volcanoes do not have pyroclastic clouds that extend beyond their bases Some must always confine at or near the summit and even the rare big pyroclastic cloud almost never rolls out beyond 10 miles In fact to give you an idea pompey Which was hit by a pyroclastic cloud was situated five miles from the base of mount visuvius Which is why I always say anyway If you want that truly amazing killer active volcano view make sure you're at least 10 or 15 miles from the base In fact, I know of a few gringos who live within 10 miles of one

[18:15] And it's the biggest thing they see when they walk out on their balconies and at night They see the red hot flow of the lava pouring down the side of a mountain too and occasionally they feel slight tremors when it explodes And that can happen monthly or even weekly In fact, I know of some volcanoes that have some first world subdivisions well within the 10 mile limit But we're talking about dormant volcanoes now And of course, like I said before it's all about the view That said latin america's got a pretty good history going back around 2000 years of which volcanoes are dormant and which are active And there are quite a few active ones that aren't doing much just shooting some smoke out once in a while Occasionally throwing a small trickle of lava down the side that never quite reaches the base

[19:01] Some of them have been doing the same old thing off and on for hundreds of years now So the locals believe it'll always be self-limiting like that and nothing will come of it The fact is every year you see on the news up in the states multi-million dollar houses in california tumbling down cliffs and mudslides Not to mention million dollar houses being consumed by forest fires And you wonder how'd that happen and in the same places all the time, too. Are we humans that stupid? Well, we really are aren't we? I mean look we voted in bush clinton. Oh vomit. Need I say more? Yep, not only does stupidity run in the human race it gallops Which is why we're long overdue for a good dose of chlorine in the political gene pool But back to active volcanoes, you know, the worst part of living near an active volcano is the ash

[19:50] Even if you're living 20 30 40 even 50 miles away One day you might wake up to find that your lawn car house Everything outside is completely covered with a dusting of volcanic ash It's happened to me twice already Now if you're an expat from up north like I am from chicago When you look out that window and first see that ash for a second, it looks like a nice fresh covering of snow Lesson number one if your car's dusted with ash don't hit the windshield wipers on a positive note That's why the soil down here is so tremendously fertile and you can stick anything in the ground. It'll just start growing Now if you're in the volcanic corridor the potential for falling ash is real But it's not going to happen regularly And even if a nearby volcano erupts the winds and the weather have to be just right to carry that ash to your neighborhood

[20:43] However, I do remember once driving through a town that had just recently been carpeted with ash. It was not a pretty sight Now you might be wondering why did I get blanketed twice with this stuff? How far do I live away from an active volcano? Well, i'd say i'm about 25 miles from one and about 50 miles from another So am I a little hesitant? Do I feel scared? Not in the least However, if you bring your mother or your grandmother down from the states And of course they see on the news once in a while that a volcano is blown off somewhere in latin america and they're all worried They will ask questions In fact I still get the occasional frantic email or phone call when such an event shows up in the first world news Even if it's a thousand miles in three countries away from where I am at the time That's the power of the if it bleeds it leads popular press

[21:31] That would be like phoning my relatives up in chicago asking them if they were all right after katrina hit the Oh, and let me mention this down here in latin america. The sun is extremely penetrating You know closer to the equator and all that so the sun's rays are more perpendicular And when you're in my favorite place the lt plano you're often fooled You're up quite high at four five six seven thousand feet So the sun's rays have less atmosphere to penetrate thus their damaging effects are not only accelerated They're multiplied. I noticed this right away when I first came down too Besides getting easily sunburned in about 15 to 20 minutes I noticed that when I parked my car next to a fairly new car just a couple years old

[22:17] The paint jobs were old and faded beyond their years dull Alligator checked chalky Just like a lot of old shriveled up gringo sun worshipers. You see all the time down here So anyway, if you don't put your new or light new car in a garage after a year or so The paint job will never be the same the upholstery and the dashboard will suffer too bleached out dry chalky looking eventually streaked with Alligator checks and hairline cracks, you know the story if you're from my generation You probably owned a few beaters like that in your younger days Hey back then any wheels were good wheels, right? But nowadays, you know entitled american kids just have to have a new car and it's gotta be the one they want Or they'll make your life miserable. Some little darlings demand a mini cooper got that in my own family

[23:04] Don't get me started. God. I'm glad I don't live there anymore Anyway down here if you don't have a garage or a carport the sun can turn your nice car into a white trash mobile In about three years you've got to protect it bottom line Always park in a covered garage or under a nice big shade tree if you're forced to park on the street or in an open lot And on that note don't leave any electronics dogs or children in your car either However, there are way too many cats politicians and mother-in-laws So do lock them in at your own discretion And yes, we have earthquakes too just as you get the occasional hurricane tornado and flood up north You don't like them, but you get used to them kind of practically every latin country gets a few hundred earthquakes a week Sometimes a day, but they're so small only a seismograph can register them

[23:53] Last time we had a noticeable shaker in my neck of the woods was around three weeks ago Nothing to write home about though didn't even wake the dogs. It was about a four on the rictor scale We get one of those about every few months How much you feel one depends on when and where you are if it's on the coast or your inland and where the epicenter is located And also your own personal sensitivity to them Some people feel the slightest ones others say what what you're talking about in fact I'm one of those more insensitive guys people talk about an earthquake and I say really if you say so But we all feel the big ones. We had two bigger ones Not so long ago about a 5.5 to a six that rattled the windows and lasted for around 30 seconds The dishes rattled the dog sparked the driveway chickens were worried their eggs would roll into the street

[24:42] But no real damage done not to any first world style construction sites. Anyway, that's the key You know, you have to have first world anti seismic construction, but you knew that right? So the longer you're down here the more you get used to it In fact expat eddie never stirs until the umbrella falls out of his drink So to sum things up wherever you're going to live in latin america. There's probably going to be a volcano That's active nearby certainly within a couple hours drive Spectacular yes, but no danger to us unless we happen to live on the side of the thing or near the base As many groups of poor people often do Just remember the active ones have generally been bubbling and spurting away for years and only idiots squatters in drunks Live nearby because that kind of lands cheap or even free. No wonder why now as far as earthquakes

[25:32] There's a really big shaker wherever you are in latin america about every 25 years or so We're talking seven plus on the rictor scale I've been through one myself, which is why I personally would never live in any high rise That's over four stories no matter what the architects and builders say about anti seismic first world regs They're supposed to resist, you know an 8.6 whopper But this is the third world, you know And even if the plans and the builders are all first world people coming in from sweden or canada Whatever to do the project you got to wonder who on the construction site is doing the checking And what about a few years down the line? You'd think the buildings should be inspected to see if there's been any damage along the way because like I said

[26:19] There are constant little earthquakes going on all the time Again, those are my thoughts just my opinion Okay, we're getting close to the end of the show now And this is for all you listeners out there who just can't make it to my expat insider seminar By the way after the election no matter who wins Everything and I mean everything points to the fact that all hell's gonna break loose up north where you live So who knows how long i'll be able to keep doing my expat insider seminars? Meanwhile, there are many many astute listeners out there who just can't make it down to my next seminar Whether it's money scheduling problems, or they just can't get off the treadmill For them there still are some very good options to move along on their get out of dodge plan b That's why i've put together a course called the expat essentials

[27:05] It's a great way to get your plan b going while you're stalled up there in the states and can't get boots on the ground Just go to www.expatplanb.com Check out those three free videos that'll help you get your plan b off to a running start Finally don't forget to check out my youtube channel got about 100 videos up there now That's youtube slash the expat files all one word. Don't forget to subscribe. It's free south of the border This is the expat files living in latin america If you want me to help you out with your own plan b just schedule a one-on-one consult Send me an email the expat files at gmail.com And if you want to learn how to move forward with your own plan b from right up there in the states go to

[27:51] www.expatplanb.com and check out my three videos. See ya nos vemos