#567 – The Expat Files: Venezuela’s Crisis, Media Myopia, and Expatriate Strategies

Automatically transcribed from the original recording; names and wording may contain errors.

[00:00] South of the border down Mexico way That's where I fell in love when the stars above came up to play and now I wonder Hello there all you expat wannabes. I'm Johnny Mueller and you're listening to the expat files living in Latin America The show that tells you just what it's like to live work play and or retire down here in Latin America It's a mix of the good the bad the ugly and the great and it's all right here. So let's get started Lately some of you have been wondering why I haven't been hammering on that people's paradise of Venezuela You know the country that's got the highest inflation rate in the world where people are now routinely eating cats dogs and rats a place where they're using leaves and

[00:47] Newspapers instead of toilet paper cuz there just ain't any Except in the offices of those people in the higher echelons of government, of course, hmm Now that begs the question. What did humans use before toilet paper? Well, let's not ponder that question Yep, no doubt about it. Venezuela is a basket case You know, I've been there a couple of times and fairly recently too and there's absolutely nothing on the shelves the commercial center is the malls They call them central commercial is here in Latin America They do have people in them But they walk around like zombies until they hear there's some kind of products on the shelves and they rush to buy the stuff Or even loot you knew that already you've heard it elsewhere. It's all over the news You're probably sick of hearing about it And when people send me emails saying Johnny wouldn't that be a great place to invest then in Venezuela?

[01:32] Look, it's falling apart. Isn't that what Doug Casey and all the contrarian investors are saying, you know Buy when there's blood in the streets Well, there is blood in the streets and those are wise words of investment by when there's blood in the streets But not when you've got a crazy ass strong man dictator like Maduro That said let me read a few excerpts and paraphrase from the British newspaper the Guardian the writer is Nick Cohen He makes some very interesting comments how certain parts of the first world media have been Infatuated with Chavez and Maduro and all those other little socialist movements that have popped up around the world I don't get it. Why do Hollywood types love photo ops with popes dictators and narcos? So let me paraphrase this article it says who goes Chavez and now president Nicolas Maduro have systematically and

[02:23] successfully used diluted Hollywood pimps as well as Western celebrities and intellectuals to further their socialist agenda then it says since 1998 Western first world media celebrities have enjoyed being photographed next to exotic socialist strongmen like Hugo Chavez And his clumsy successor Nicolas Maduro while hammering on their anti capitalist anti imperialist messages at the same time They're pumping hands and embracing their favorite first world celebrities Then not surprisingly after a few days in the presidential spotlight They jet back to New Yorker Hollywood to enjoy free market Capitalism the only system that can provide the luxury goods and services to support their VIP lifestyles

[03:09] That said here's a list of some of the top American media types that have actually paid a visit to Venezuela and who have Thoroughly enjoyed those photo ops here, too We have a list of their incredibly stupid quotes on the record number one that chain-smoking pushead Sean Penn First he says Chavez is a fascinating guy. He's done incredible things for the very poor Then he said in response to a question from Bill Maher who asked him about the fate of journalists who labeled Chavez as a dictator Penn said there should be a law that one should go to prison for such lies And then he said after Chavez died quote Venezuela and its revolution will endure under the proven leadership of vice president Maduro

[03:55] What a brown-noser, huh, by the way, if I'm ever in a room with Sean Penn Somebody please hand me a selfie stick a big-ass pointy one would be just fine Okay, then number two on the Chavez brown-nose parade. That would be none other than director Oliver Stone Now I really like a lot of his movies, but I think in this case. He's not only one toke over the line I'm thinking he's had way too much Colombian marching powder Anyway, a while back before Venezuela went into the crapper stone said quote look at the positive changes that have happened Economically in Venezuela, and they're happening all over South America because of leaders like Chavez and Argentina's Kirchner Hmm Attaboy Ali have another hit you can really pick them makes you wonder then how Argentina's completely run out of their foreign reserves and have

[04:46] 30% inflation to not to mention for 15 years running the government's defaulted on its own bonds But Oliver Stone calls these positive economic changes in fact He says when you have great leaders like Kirchner and Chavez there should be no term limits by the way inflation rates in Venezuela are estimated by Harvard professor Ricardo Hausmann at over 200% for the year 2015 and he's calculating. It'll be over 700% for 2016 All right, that's said now we have number three on first-world celebrity Chavez Maduro chupaculo list by the way chupa means suck and cool. Oh, well think you know that one Yep, same chupa in chupacabra, which means goat sucker, but where were we? Oh, yeah the next on the list

[05:38] Would you believe Naomi Campbell the supermodel? She visited Hugo Chavez in 2007 and after he flirted with her and laid on his Halitostically malignant charms. She said in a GQ interview quote Whatever the future holds for me Hugo will always be a rebel angel say what? Hugo Chavez my rebel angel Where's that poison tipped selfie stick when you need it God almost makes you want to boycott Victoria's secrets Oh and by the way when you do get down here to Latin America You can boycott Victoria's secrets because it's very very high priced compared to the other Lingerie stores down here. Yep. There are all kinds of Latin American lingerie chain stores Very nice stuff and the only ones that are expensive are the chain stores coming from Colombia since Colombia and Colombian figures are all the rage

[06:29] Now everybody wants to look like Sofia Vergara, but you knew that already, right? Yep, you got to get your boots on the ground and see that stuff to believe it now about Naomi Campbell by the way She made that quote in a GQ article and now you can't find it They pulled it off their website, but let's get back to the Venezuelan brown nose list now for number four that bulbous bloated Hippo of hypocrisy Michael Moore after his personal ass-kissing fest with Hugo Chavez and Nicolas Maduro He tweeted in 2013 after Chavez's death quote Hugo Chavez declared the oil Belong to the people and he used the oil money to eliminate 75% of extreme poverty and to provide free health and education for all Now he said that before Venezuela went deep into the toilet

[07:16] Oh, and by the way, isn't it strange that Michael Moore remains silent as all those news reports coming out of Venezuela are showing how the police Are cracking heads on poor Venezuelans protesting food shortages. Hmm, Michael Moore now There's a guy I bet who's larder has never been short of well lard Okay, then what celebrity Chavez brown noser comes in at number five You'll never guess how about Don King now for the uninitiated He just might be some black guy with Donald Trump hair But really Don King is far and away the most criminal crooked boxing promoter of all time Now Don King on his visit to the Chavez revolutionary Venezuela said in no uncertain terms in

[08:02] 2004 quote to see what's happening here in Venezuela makes me feel good all over That's from Don King who promoted Muhammad Ali Joe Fraser George Foreman Larry Holmes Mike Tyson all of them who brought him up on Felony fraud charges all of whom he paid off with six and seven digit payoffs to avoid conviction in jail time nice role model, huh? Of course all these idiot first-world celebrity quotes I'm giving you now came before Venezuela experienced hyperinflation and a failed state status, which just goes to show what great prognosticators and clairvoyance So many of our illustrious media blockheads are funny how you never hear of Oliver Stone Michael Moore Sean Pan Etc given their money away to the poor oh and by the way You probably read that there's no more coca-cola being produced in Venezuela because they ran out of sugar

[08:51] Well, it's a matter of semantics. They didn't run out of coke. They'll never run out of coke They ran out of coca-cola and now for first world media idiot number six Jeremy Corbin He's the head of the British Labor Party who in 2007 visited Venezuela and said in a press conference. I congratulate mr. Chavez Venezuela is seriously conquering poverty How by emphatically? Rejecting the neoliberal policies of the world's financial institutions Yeah, right and meanwhile in late 2015 a World Health Organization study revealed that 76% of Venezuela's population are considered to be in extreme poverty Which begs the question back in 2009 when Jeremy Corbin head of the British Labor Party said Chavez's policies have

[09:41] Seriously conquered poverty that makes me think of the weekly show on e-entertainment Latin America You know they have their version of it, too. There is a half an hour show called Zona trendy Caracas Yep, we're talking about Caracas Venezuela. I kid you not who'd a thunk huh in fact When's the last time you check the labels on your trendy designer clothes to see if they were made or designed in Caracas? The fact is Venezuela has only got three exports Oil people and drugs and we're not talking Pepto bismol or aspirin here now. Here's some info You'll never get unless you actually traveled to Caracas yourself I'd say about 95% of the place is an absolute ghetto dump and it seems the only nice buildings parks and streets etc

[10:27] Are in the government areas and districts however? There's a program like I said called trendy Caracas where all the young beautiful people are living the high life Eating and drinking and playing and partying at fantastic restaurants and high-end establishments There's pet house pool parties and birthday bashes, etc However in the half a dozen times. I've been to Caracas in the last five or six years I've never once been able to find where they filmed that and where those high-end places are Always been kind of a mystery to me. I've often wondered where are all those beautiful people and where they hanging out now for a long time I thought they were filming it in Bogota or Medellin or Cali, Colombia because they Really do have some high-end slick and trendy places there and first world prices, too

[11:15] But Caracas well, it's a dump. So then what's this zone trendy Caracas crap all about? Well, guess what? There's a program on Latin e-entertainment television called trendy Colombia So what I think is that e-entertainment made a deal with Venezuela just to get that each channel programming into the country In other words, no trendy Caracas no ETV in the country Now you have to remember that the zone at trendy shows are very popular and they show off all the cool upscale trendy places And where all the beautiful people hang out now, you probably don't know this but Venezuela and Colombia have a love-hate relationship They compete against each other very heavily including beauty pageants, especially beauty pageants The Colombians think they're better more advanced more intelligent more

[12:03] Socially evolved in the Venezuelans and I've been to both many times and I'll tell you that's pretty much true And the Venezuelans until now anyway since the inflation and the failed state status They always believed they were superior to the Colombians It reminds me of a soccer match people go to see their team win But they're also looking for some real action a fight in the parking lot a beard tossed in someone's face You get the idea now these days it seems like every Venezuelan wants to sneak into Colombia to live a better life and Every Colombian wants to sneak into Venezuela so we can buy gas for 12 cents a gallon and shoot right back Which makes for a huge illegal immigration problem on the Colombian side In fact, it used to be if you were from Venezuela, you could go to Colombia on a 90-day tourist visa No problems just flash your passport at the border

[12:49] But nowadays you have to have a reason to go to Colombia a very good reason for example you have to show them prepaid hotel vouchers and exact itinerary and a Colombian contact in the country a reference as well as a valid credit card a lot of hoops to jump through that just a Year or so ago were never there before but let's get back to that program Trendy Caracas a couple of times I've seen it on the tube as I'm sitting down in some Latin American sauce Like I said, the tubes always on it's a babysitter not for the kids of the babies, but for the cleaning lady Anyway, last time I ran across it was about two months ago And I stood there and waited until the credits roll to see where they filmed that thing Also, I was curious to see what line of clothing and shoe stores and brands from Caracas

[13:36] Obviously that I could pick out of the credits at the end of the show But alas the credits rolled and there was no such info that as opposed to their sister's show Zona trendy Colombia, which had a ton of Colombian sponsors in the credits By the way down here sponsors are called Patro Sinidores Having the root word patron in it and of course a patron is well a patron Oh, by the way, I mentioned in the past show that all the radio and TV stations do make promotional deals with local companies Basically, they're trading or bartering services just like they do up in the States For example, if you look at the tonight show credits You'll see who supplies the limos and the tuxes and all that in exchange for a mention in the credits Well, let me tell you that's a huge business down here a tit-for-tat with no money exchanged

[14:24] In Spanish, it's called con hey see a nj e and we really have no single English word counterpart for that But I digress as usual anyway So what's up with e entertainment and trendy Caracas one of the least trendy places on earth? I'd say unless you're talking about places that are trending deep into the crapper. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. Stop the presses I'm looking at the net now checking out trendy Caracas in Spanish, of course, and I see for the past couple of months They've had reruns. Hey get this. It says in the Latin media reports, Venezuelan cheerleader and model Catarina Valentino host of the program is on a trendy Caracas announced Monday There will no longer be a trendy Caracas program broadcast on e entertainment Latin America She says the reason for the decision is due mostly to the insecurity at the time we record them

[15:15] She says quote the situation in Venezuela is extreme and is now touching all of my team at the trendy zone Caracas program She says her team has been attacked on the streets of Caracas several times while filming Even after hiring a number of bodyguards for the safety of our technical team all of it's become so very complicated in Venezuela She said now this is the kicker. She says I've done many shows and reports that were in truth quite remote from reality Hmm. Oh really and I'm not proud about that. Aha That's me in my sounds again. Anyway, she laments It's preferable that we close out the program other than supply the official censored version Oh Then she says our team and myself have tried hard to keep the program afloat until the very last moment which is now

[16:06] But the situation is so difficult that despite our efforts of over five years working on this show It is not possible to maintain operations in the country anymore However, I'm still part of the NBC Universal chain, which is part of e-entertainment Latin America Yeah, yeah, blah blah blah and there is an international proposal To continue with the program when things get better and they must get better then she finishes by saying in capital letters Venezuela will not defeat me then she says sadly there are really no nationally syndicated programs coming out of Venezuela anymore The last program being canceled due to similar problems called I Corazon which means in English there is a heart So there you have it. She admits they were BSing much of the time, but where were we?

[16:54] Oh, yeah s kissing with the stars who else is on the Hugo Chavez brown nose list? Well, that would be Danny Glover. Yep. You know him Danny Glover the poor man's Morgan Freeman who in 2014 right before Venezuela took its last swirl around the toilet was quoted as saying he praised the Venezuelans for Continuing to realize Hugo Chavez's vision of participatory democracy How noble in statesman like and kind of odd since in Venezuela? It's against the law for a journalist to criticize the government. Did you know in Venezuela you go to jail for that now according to Human Rights There's a law in Venezuela that says anyone can be jailed for Libeling the government and who determines the definition of libel take a guess

[17:42] How about the judges and magistrates that were appointed by Chavez and president Maduro accordingly professional journalists? And people who have been taking photos or filming security force Confrontations with protesters have ended up in jail Meanwhile the Venezuelan press has reported that the police and the National Guard have arrested numerous Citizens for merely filming long lines of people who due to severe food shortages are waiting outside of supermarkets for hours at a time And how about this one in 2004 when Chavez was still alive the National Electoral Council? Published the names of all the people who signed a petition to oust Hugo Chavez The Tascone list as it came to be known was later published and used by the Venezuelan government to deny access to state jobs

[18:29] And welfare benefits worse yet according to the Spanish daily newspaper ABC a half a million state employees in Venezuela mentioned in that Tascone report lost their jobs for signing in favor of the recall referendum against Chavez others were denied passports and legal paperwork including personal documents in foreign currency when simply trying to leave the country legally and according to an article in douche well famous German magazine President Maduro has threatened to fire any state employee who signs the petition to carry out a recall Referendum against him warning that the signatures will be inspected one by one yep That's how Venezuela's participatory social democracy works and nope

[19:15] It's not a place recommended for a man beast nor expat on by the way Did you know that Danny Glover was given a movie to produce and direct? Financed by the Venezuelan Council on film in the arts a contract given to him personally by Hugo Chavez And according to reports he received the sum of 18 million bucks for a movie that never got made and the money was never returned Nice work if you can get it so then what's next for Venezuela, and will the contagion spread well who knows? But I'll certainly keep you posted enough said about Venezuela in fact way too much said now after that did that show Mentioning that in Latin America a lot of the common salt that you buy in the grocery store has fluoride in it And almost all salt down here as iodine in it, too

[20:03] Well, I figured I'd get some emails on that one and I did I'm not worried so much about the iodine But it's the fluoride that said I can see how some people would be worried about fluoride levels when they eat out in restaurants So here's a tip if you eat at low-end restaurants or street kiosks You can bet they're gonna use the cheapest ingredients and most all of the very cheap salts have fluoride in them So how'd that happen because there are so many foolish dumbasses in government that say well since we can't afford the equipment to put Fluoride in our drinking water and the gringo say it's good for you We'll do the next best thing and suggest it goes into something everyone uses table salt and since all the first world Toothpaste companies are down here in Latin America and thus they have the usual TV propaganda extolling the virtues of fluoride

[20:52] That's why ninety nine point nine nine percent of Latins think it's good for you in fact in all my years down here I've never met anyone who was anti fluoride. I've never even heard the topic discussed except among gringo expats again It's about the lag time here now It's like it was back in the 50s 60s and 70s in the states back Then the idea that fluoride was bad wasn't even a fleeting thought though Isn't it strange that at least for a hundred years fluoride canisters had the skull and crossbones on them anyway Like I said if you eat at a cheap restaurant or street food at a kiosk I guarantee you they're buying the cheapest salt and it's gonna have fluoride and iodine in it However, you can go into almost any grocery store and buy a higher-end salt just for a few pennies more like for example

[21:39] They have Morton salt down here and kosher and different kinds of Mediterranean sea salts And I mentioned that before when I was discussing this topic. So bottom line I wouldn't worry about eating food that's loaded with fluoride if you're cooking at home Obviously because you're reading labels and getting the unadulterated stuff And of course if you're at a medium to high-end restaurant, it's doubtful They're using the cheap ass salt that has the fluoride in it Now if you're worried or in doubt, you could always ask the waiter to show you the bag or the box However, he just might give you that look, you know, the Mormon eyes that subtle You're a crazy gringo look because no one I mean No one has ever asked him that question before in his life So go ahead have a look at the package it came from going to the kitchen if you have to or you can do

[22:24] What I've done for probably the past 25 years don't put salt on anything. I just don't oh, wait a minute There are two things that found absolutely need salt popcorn and eggs. No not together. That would be Nasty so anyway, that's how I handle it and you can handle it like that, too That said I've got another slew of emails in the last maybe month month and a half People are trying to tell me that it's no longer possible for Americans to open up bank accounts in foreign countries because banks Just don't want to deal with the reporting requirements the fat gun gatka thing. They say that's the info They're getting on the internet and what the blogs are saying So some people are still of the opinion that the only way to get a foreign bank account in Latin America or elsewhere Is by having an essay corporation which can open your bank account or if you have a residency in that country

[23:14] Then you can open an account. Well, some of that is true. Some isn't and here is the skinny. Yes It's true. You can open up a bank account if you have an essay corporation But you'll only be able to open up that bank account in the country where you've registered that company So if you have an essay corporation in Nicaragua, you can open bank accounts all day long in Nicaragua But you can't go to Costa Rica and open up a bank account and vice versa though There are exceptions to that rule don't count on it And that's why for example, if you're down in Latin America and you see a big Nestle's plant Of course Nestle's is everywhere producing not only chocolate but synthetic Substandard infant formulas and crap and yes They have bank accounts all over the world because they need them wherever they have offices and manufacturing

[24:00] However, before they get a bank account in a foreign country They have to re-register the company name in that country with a local essay corporation or LLC And it's as simple as calling their new infant formula division or diet soda division Nestle's Costa Rica or Nestle's Haiti or Nestle's Biafra or Bangladesh. So bottom line don't think if you create a Belize corporation You can use that paperwork to open up a bank account in Nicaragua It won't happen and vice versa now The second way to open up a bank account in a latin country is to get Residency in that country first and then go down to the bank with your residency card and they'll open up an account for you It doesn't matter if you're an American citizen or not Once you're a resident you can open up a bank account But you can't use the residency card for example in Nicaragua to open up a bank account in

[24:49] Salvador and vice versa Now as I mentioned on past shows the third way to open up a bank account is to have a trusted lawyer down here become your Theodore, you know your cosigner so to speak though He has no real control over that account at all. No signatory power or anything. He just vouches for you Now you can't just walk into any old lawyer's office down here and say hey I want to pay you to open a bank account for me First of all, he doesn't know you from Adam and he just might treat you with suspicion Like you're trying to pull a scam or something now, like I mentioned in a previous show in the case of Panama That's high on the radar now. There are lawyers down there that will try to open up bank accounts for you But they won't even promise they'll get it done, but you'll have to pay their fee anyway however in latin countries off the gringo trail like Nicaragua Salvador Guatemala a

[25:38] Trusted lawyer there will take you down to a bank and help you open an account He'll be your fee adore now in each latin country There are many banks and some will let you open an account that way and some won't now in the case of Guatemala I know a couple of lawyers that'll charge in the range of two to three hundred dollars and they'll Guarantee that they can open you a bank account and if something goes wrong along the way and you can't open that account somehow They won't charge you that fee So why is it so much easier in some countries to open a bank account and not for example in Panama? That's because off the tourist trail the banks have hardly any American citizens opening an account So it's no big paperwork problem for them that said if you come down to my July 2016 expat insider seminar You'll meet a lawyer or two face-to-face that can do this little service for you if that's what you wish that said time is short

[26:26] You better get your plan B in action now because the loopholes are closing and so are the doors It's getting harder and harder to lead the states and harder and harder to get your permanent and temporary Residency in Latin American countries to in fact in all foreign countries because you're a sheep that uncle Sam wants to shoot And he can't very well do that when you're outside the country now, can he so if you think things are gonna get better up in The states good luck with that even so you'll still need a plan B So just go to www.thenewexpat.com click on Johnny's 2016 seminar link at the top of the page come on down and get that plan B started and While you're there Don't forget to check out the famous John Galt and his pre and post seminar trips, which are highly rated I highly recommend them and I'm seriously considering going on this second trip myself

[27:15] So do check them out. You won't regret it. And finally have a look at my YouTube channel It's always nice to see the slides and photos that go along with the audio show and believe me Some of those photos are pretty unusual. I think you're gonna like them. Don't forget to subscribe. It's free South of the border You've been listening to the expat files living in Latin America coming to you twice a week from somewhere south of the border Email me the expat files at gmail.com And if you want me to help you sort out your own Latin American plans schedule a one-on-one Consult with me just send an email and let me know at the expat files at gmail.com. No spamos