Episode Summary
In this episode of The Expat Files, Johnny Mueller begins by welcoming listeners to the show, which explores life in Latin America. He then reads an email from a listener named Monty, who is planning to become an expat and is preparing to learn Spanish. Monty mentions that he has listened to all of Johnny's last 200 shows multiple times and is seeking the first 200 shows, which Johnny explains are being compiled into a package with an index. Monty also shares his experience living in Florida, where he has access to many Spanish language channels and suggests that Obama should address his audience as 'Americanos' during speeches. Monty expresses his intention to stay in Latin America permanently but notes that his Spanish is still weak. He discusses how watching Spanish language TV channels, especially news broadcasts, helps with conversational Spanish, but other programming is less helpful. Monty also comments on the unrealistic portrayal of life in US cities in Latin American soap operas, which he believes give a false impression of what it's like to live in the US.
Johnny Mueller then discusses his experience with learning Spanish through Latin American soap operas, highlighting their repetitive and predictable plotlines. He notes that while the content may seem clichéd or absurd, it has been effective for language acquisition. He also critiques Latin music channels, particularly the 'cantaña' or 'cowboy music' channels, for their monotonous and repetitive nature, which he believes is not useful for learning conversational Spanish. Instead, he recommends watching soap operas as a more practical method for language learning.
Johnny continues by discussing the challenges of learning Spanish through Latin music, particularly noting the limited vocabulary and the prevalence of slang in rap and hip-hop. He mentions that while some Latin artists have clever lyrics, many rely on simple, one-syllable words. Johnny also touches on the broader context of Latin music's global reach, including classic Latin rock and its presence in Latin America and the United States. He highlights the political tensions in Venezuela, where two Venezuelan artists openly criticized the government, leading to a televised rebuke by President Maduro. Johnny compares this situation to the United States, emphasizing the constitutional and political differences. Finally, he acknowledges an email from Anthony about expat Eddie's issues with a Latin girlfriend, noting that Eddie's problems were self-inflicted.
The podcast segment then shifts to a discussion about expat Eddie's issues with his Latin girlfriend, attributing his problems to his own behavior as a beta or Omega male. Johnny highlights the financial costs Eddie has incurred, including a used VW, a baby grand piano, and a new SUV with a personal driver, estimating the total cost at around $45,000. He also mentions Eddie's home upgrade and the potential for a beach house. Johnny then shifts to a broader discussion about the impact of remittances from Latin Americans living in the U.S. on their home countries, noting how some use the money to build first-world-style retirement homes. He contrasts this with illegal immigrants who often send money back to build lavish homes in poor neighborhoods, highlighting the difference between naturalized and second-generation Latin Americans and their desire to maintain strict immigration policies.
Finally, Johnny Mueller discusses the proposed Nicaragua Canal, highlighting its potential as a massive construction project and the controversies surrounding it. He critiques the involvement of Daniel Ortega, the Nicaraguan president, and questions the feasibility of the project given the financial and political challenges. Johnny also touches on the role of Chinese businessman Wang Jing, who has secured significant privileges and exemptions for the project, raising concerns about transparency and corruption.
Topics
The Expat Files podcast, Monty's experience as an expat wannabe, Spanish language learning, Spanish language TV channels in the US, Latin American soap operas, False impressions of life in the US, Learning Spanish through soap operas, Critique of Latin music channels, Language acquisition through media, Learning Spanish through Latin music, Political tensions in Venezuela, Comparison of political systems
Chapters
00:00:00 Opening 00:00:32 Monty's Email and the First 200 Shows 00:01:09 Johnny's Response to Monty's Email 00:01:44 Monty's Experience with Spanish Language Channels 00:02:05 Monty's Plan to Stay in Latin America 00:02:55 Monty's Comments on Spanish Language Soap Operas 00:06:19 Introduction to Latin Soap Operas and Their Plotlines 00:06:54 Johnny's Opinion on the Absurdity of Soap Operas 00:08:36 Conclusion: Learning Spanish Through Soap Operas 00:12:41 Learning Spanish through Latin Music and Rap Lyrics 00:14:23 Political Tensions in Venezuela and the Response from President Maduro 00:18:44 Expat Eddie's Issues with His Latin Girlfriend 00:18:59 Anthony's Comments on Expat Eddie 00:19:47 Financial Costs of Eddie's Relationship 00:21:18 Impact of Remittances on Latin American Communities 00:23:43 Economic Disparities Between U.S. and Latin American Families 00:25:00 Introduction to the Nicaragua Canal Project 00:25:07 The Scale and Feasibility of the Project 00:25:14 Daniel Ortega's Role and Motivations 00:25:21 Ortega's Claims and Johnny's Skepticism 00:25:29 The Financial and Political Context 00:25:37 The Role of Chinese Investors 00:25:45 The Legal and Regulatory Framework 00:25:46 The Financial Challenges and Uncertainties
Transcript
Automatically transcribed from the original recording; names and wording may contain errors.
[00:00] South of the border down Mexico way That's where I fell in love when the stars above came up to play and now I wonder Hello there all you expat wannabes. I'm Johnny Mueller and you're listening to the expat files living in Latin America The show that tells you just what it's like to live work play and or retire down here in Latin America It's a mix of the good the bad the ugly and the great and it's all right here. So let's get started Okay. Now here's an email for you. It comes from Monty He says dear Johnny think I've listened to all of your last 200 shows at least four times each I know sounds like I've got a lot of time on my hands, right? Well, it's like that old saying
[00:46] It's the wise man that sees trouble and gets out of the way and man here in the USA I see trouble and that's why I'm preparing to become an expat first. I'm learning my Spanish However, I'd like to know where I can get your first 200 shows. I can't seem to find them anywhere I really hope they're not lost in the ether. That would be a shame. All right, Monty Let's hold up for a second there before I go on with your email. Let me throw some light on that subject I'm actually putting together a package that's gonna include the first 400 shows or so with a gigantic index So people can reference back to topics They want to hear as you might imagine since that's like about 200 hours of a show It's taking a long long time to do so which means because I'm on manana time here
[01:36] Of course, you're all gonna have to wait at least a couple months for that to come out But I'll keep you posted you can count on that Anyway, Monty goes out to say Johnny I'm down here in Florida and we get way too many Spanish language radio and TV channels In fact, there are probably more than in English and I have a suggestion the next time Obama swings through this part of the country He should start his speeches by saying my fellow Americanos that would certainly be more in tune with what's really happening down here And though I plan on coming to one of your seminars. I hope you have one next summer. I'll be there I do absolutely plan on staying in Latin America permanently But one big problem my Spanish does suck So I found that as you suggested watching some of these Spanish language TV stations
[02:24] Sometimes really does help with the conversational Spanish especially when I'm listening to the newscasters who thankfully talk slow enough enunciate and don't use Latin slang however, watching any other channel in Spanish unless it's a translated English language documentary or Netgo special or something are almost no help as far as my Spanish goes with a few exceptions Now I know what you mean by lack of quality and the way they dumb down things even though they're not trying That's just the way it is now Of course, I'm talking about the programming which usually comes from Brazil or Mexico or Argentina and believe it or not Just lately surprise surprise Miami and Chicago and New York and LA could that be? reverse lag time effect
[03:11] Anyway, here's what I've noticed They've got a lot of these Spanish language soap operas going that are actually taking place in big cities up in the US Because I'm sure these producers have figured out that all of Latin America craves anything US like you say So Spanish language programming coming for example from a big city up north Would really be cool in all the fashion for Latin's watching in Paraguay or Bolivia or Peru for example And to stress that first world coolness factor to Latin viewers They make a point of even having the name of the US city in the title like for example the maids of New York In Spanish, of course, that would be las muchachas de Nueva York. I know you might have mentioned that before maybe even more than once
[03:59] I just want to confirm to you the fact that Situations in the content are absolutely unreal. That stuff just doesn't happen in real life There isn't a chance in hell that any Latin family lives like that still these programs get huge ratings So Latin's especially the ones in Latin America where they're obviously Syndicating those programs certainly eat that stuff right up somehow I can only imagine they believe their friends and family that have escaped to the US along the way are Living like that or hope to live like that who knows talk about the American dream that never was What I mean is these programs are like the ultimate Unattainable fantasy. I mean look I live in Florida and Latin's unless they're narcos Just don't live like that and the amazing thing is these Latin soap operas that are actually taking place in US cities
[04:51] never show the scummy side or the body o's everything is squeaky clean as sterile as Disneyland I know that they're filmed in these big cities too because when they roll the credits at the end they say filmed in Chicago or New York or whatever and of course, we all know that New York and Miami and Chicago and LA are squeaky clean Don't we my point is in between the lame lazy plots in the dialogue? They show street scenes of rich upper Manhattan when the soap opera is supposed to be in New York and you have scenes taking place in the ultra expensive Magnificent Mile and Lakeshore Drive District for the soap opera that takes place in Chicago then for the Miami soap opera You've got everything taking place in South Beach where you practically have to be a millionaire to get a library card
[05:40] now like I said I live in Miami so I can vouch for the fact that none of the families that Inhabit these soap operas or the principal actors in these soap operas are living anything near a real or authentic life It's as if the producers of these shows have created a completely false world that doesn't really exist but they're projecting it all over Latin America and giving poor low-end Latins the people who are watching it of course a Completely false impression of what it's like to live like a Latin American here in the States Unless you're a Hollywood star or a drug trafficker like Scarface, Johnny You know how soap operas are plotted in Latin America Always there's a filthy rich family involved with a house full of bodyguards and servants
[06:28] And there's a whole lot of cheating going on the rich husband or the rich husband's son is cheating with the beautiful cleaning lady Or the wealthy lady of the house is cheating with the pool cleaning guy or one of the multiple bodyguards because you know every family in the United States has a beautiful team of wide-eyed Cinderella cleaning ladies and Of course a half dozen ex-secret service fashion model bodyguards in Armani suits So that's how it ridiculously paper thin those plot lines are and Johnny You know what anyone who is a non Latin who watches those shows like me would say they really test the limits of your idiot meter But they are useful. I am learning my Spanish watching those things believe it or not and I learned the street jargon, too
[07:15] I actually find that monotonously repetitive formula. They have helps a great deal to learn the language I always know what's going on and I always know what's gonna happen next So the words and the phrases eventually makes sense and here's the pattern They have about one third of the program each day devoted to the wealthy Stinking rich side of the family and what goes on in their lives and about one third of each program devoted to what's going On with the help the gardeners the maintenance men the cleaning people, etc Then the other subplot the other third of the program is generally devoted to some bad guys on the outside planning To kidnap the rich guy's daughter or there's a blackmail scheme Perpetuated by a scorned mistress. Oh, and I forgot one thing in every single soap opera
[08:03] There's always someone in the hospital in a coma harboring some deep dark family secret that needs to be revealed that's why there's always someone trying to sneak into the room to yank the life support and it's in that hospital room or The wedding that always follows at the end of every soap opera where all the parties good and bad eventually meet and eventually Everyone breaks down and cries including the men and the person in the coma Always comes out of it just in time for that huge final episode wedding So if you can stomach all that crap, it's a hell of a good way to learn your Spanish I did it and it only took me an hour to two a day for about six months So the way I did it I started by watching the newscasters and then the weather ladies
[08:52] They're always very sexy Kirby ladies in tight clothes, by the way, and then I moved on to the soap operas So what else can I recommend you watch on Spanish language TV? I admit sometimes in a moment of guilty pleasure. I search through the Latin music channels There are at least a half a dozen of them, but there is one channel. I just cannot stomach It's what you might call the Latin country western channel. They call it music a cantina or cantina music It's not country western as we know it, but everyone on the channel looks like a cowboy or cowgirl Surfing through the channels. You just can't miss them big big Mexican style hats metal tipped snakeskin boots and shiny Gaudy rodeo outfits, so you've got these sad pot-bellied guys
[09:39] Wailing away in their oversized dingle ball hats and because music videos will be music videos There are always at least a half dozen very beautiful cowgirl dancers in skimpy extra tight rodeo outfits, too So if you're ever feeling down and you want to get a real belly lap switch on one of those stations Now Johnny the truth is I have a few Latin buddies that work at the office here Second-generation guys by the way who are totally against Latin immigration believe it or not anyway They tell me that occasionally they flick on that cowboy cantina music, too They say they hate the music they claim. It's their dads and their grandpa's music No matter they to flick it on occasionally just to see the girls
[10:26] You know I guess that's a universal thing with any music channel Isn't it true that guys always pause when flicking through the channels if dancing girls appear if? That's not one of Newton's laws. It should be so that's the state of the Latin Cantina channel that we get in Miami for every one of those country channels You'll find five or ten Latin music video channels that are absolute carbon copies of first-world rap and hip-hop music channels But you will not learn regular conversational Spanish by checking those channels out You'll learn the dirty words and the curse words and the words you don't want to say in front of your mom But as for conversational Spanish nope that is unless you converse a lot with hookers and drug dealers So you've got a bunch of Latin rapster channels 24 7 and of course
[11:15] Raggaeton channels and about Raggaeton There's so much of it down here in Florida that it's reason enough to want to move out of the u.s. It's so Mind-numbingly monotonous it makes your brain throb and that's just a music if you're unlucky enough to be able to understand the words Well, it'll take your brain pain to another level even when the superhot dancing girls come on it can be painful So when channel surfing don't forget to hit the mute button So the takeaway message from all this the advice here is that you're never gonna learn any Spanish when you're watching one of those Latin music channels, but one thing you will notice when you watch these Latin rapsters and Raggaeton guys is that they copy exactly the same stupidly moronic cliched spastic monkey hand moves that all US rappers have used for ages as if they couldn't get their
[12:06] Misanthropic points across without a little annoyingly repetitive body English So they've stolen everything good and bad about American rap and Latin iced it for example There's always a tattooed hard-looking front man doing the monkey hand moves flashing his gold teeth Leaning on or sitting behind the wheel of the rap video SUV flavor of the month Escalade Ferrari, whatever and they're actually worse than the mindless misanthropic slugs that you see on US first world rap and hip-hop videos because Latin rapsters have excruciatingly limited Vocabularies it seems like they learn their lyrics from the Twitter one-syllable school of phonics At least popular first world rap and hip-hop guys have clever lyrics sometimes
[12:53] They even have the occasional three syllable word that take away again Latin music videos Not in my experience. Anyway, a good way to learn Spanish unless of course gangster ism is your career path Anyway, I just thought I'd give your listeners the good and the bad and the ugly I'm trying to learn your Spanish from Latin TV movies and videos Then finally he finishes up by saying Johnny. I know I've said an awful lot there and don't forget I'm still waiting on those first 200 expat file shows Hope you can use some of this stuff for your show keep it up as always Monty Well, thanks for that very informative email there Monty and yes I would say I think you have an awful lot of time on your hands
[13:41] I do believe it's the longest email I ever had and folks I didn't even read half of it I'm sure all you listeners out there will appreciate the fact that Monty has a way above average of vocabulary himself since he used the word Misanthropic. I mean once the last time you use that one In fact, I'd be willing to bet only about one in 20 people on the street knows what that word means Luckily, he didn't stump me on that one. I didn't have to look it up at times I've been accused of being one myself Oh, well as my old dad used to say if you don't have people slinging the occasional bar bet you you're leading a pretty boring life Not to mention you're certainly no fun at parties And you know, I'm glad he brought up that bit about the Latin rappers and stuff Because you see in the last week something amazing has happened in the world of Latin rap
[14:29] Like Monty says Latin rap and hip-hop Raggaeton and get this even classic Latin rock stations are everywhere Now I bet you didn't even know there was such a thing as classic Latin rock there is and yes It really sucks, but don't let me dissuade you from checking it out. If it weren't for bad taste We wouldn't know the difference, right? Yep down here in Latin America. If you've got the full cable TV lineup You're gonna have at least 10 Latin music stations most of them quite vomitus So if you accidentally OD or get tricked into drinking Drano or something Keep that remote handy because a Latin music channel could save your life Yep, just a little free public service announcement for you there Anyway, like I said, if you have the full cable service down here
[15:16] You have about 10 music video stations and you'll have much the same thing up in those big United States Latin American markets too because you know, there are at least 50 million people of Latin descent in the states huge market Right. So you might ask where do all these music artists and I use that term very loosely come from They have to have enough Latin artists recorded to program those stations 24-7, right? Well, as it turns out all 20 Latin American countries contribute to the music scene Of course, and they have their own local stars and ones that break through to become Latin American superstars So there's no shortage of quote talent rotating through those playlists that said Venezuela For example is a big Latin country
[16:03] So it has any number of rap and ragaton musical artists who are locally popular and some who have broken Through on the Latin American international scene and thus they're almost Perpetually on tour in other Latin countries doing interviews and concerts, etc Anyway, just this last week two famous Venezuelan music artists again I use that term loosely We're on a tour through the rest of Latin America and doing concerts personal appearances and going on radio and TV And as you might expect some of the interviewers at these TV and radio stations have been asking them about The situation in Venezuela, what's really happening on the street? and as it turns out these two Latin stars had not been coached so very well by political forces behind the throne and
[16:53] Surprisingly enough or not these two guys in interviews have been openly dissing the hell out of Maduro and their country and the way It's run now. That's not to say they're using their interviews as a platform to diss the president or anything It's just that these guys are being honest. They admit on the record that it's basically a disaster in a failed state Obviously word of all this bad press shot immediately back to president Maduro and just this week He held a televised presidential address Pre-empting all Venezuelan television stations for a couple minutes just to nail these two guys on national TV So that night sitting behind that big Venezuelan flag and the presidential desk Maduro said in effect Venezuelans especially those
[17:41] Traveling abroad have no right to criticize their country. He said it's not only crass and unpatriotic But there will be repercussions So now naturally these two guys are afraid to go back to their homeland after the tour and they're afraid for their families back home too And if you're thinking so what what's the big deal just imagine Obama calling a presidential news conference Just to slam or threaten Snoop Dogg or maybe Miley Cyrus or Justin Bieber with a stretch in Guantanamo totally unconstitutional and uncalled for Except maybe with Cyrus and Bieber they can bunk up Anyway, you can see just what kind of desperate acts and measures Officials will resort to in a country that's run by a lying
[18:28] socialist tin pot quasi dictator and Maduro is pretty bad too. And on that pleasant note, let's take another email. It's a long one too So I'll paraphrase it a bit now This one's from Anthony who was writing in response to that show I did a week or so ago about expat Eddie and the big problems he's having with his Latin girlfriend Problems I might add that expat Eddie has created himself. He of all people should have known better So here's what Anthony says about that He says Johnny is expat Eddie a beta male or maybe an Omega male? Those betas and Omega guys do okay when it comes to business and finance But they fall down miserably when a halfway decent-looking woman enters their lives my advice
[19:17] He's just gonna have to fail and get taken to the cleaners and hope he learns from this. He's getting off easy, too I mean really how much has this Latin woman cost him thus far? Let's review a bit of what's happened to Eddie Well, he started out small a couple years ago and number one bought her a used VW Then later she begged for a baby grand piano for the house, which she never plays because well She can't play then the topper lately. He bought her a new SUV Complete with her own personal driver now Johnny my rough math says this is like 40 to 45,000 bucks, maybe a little more. Oh and I forgot the upgrade on the home Which I know expat Eddie has remodeled to make it more quote lady friendly
[20:05] I wonder has she been able to talk him into that beach house yet Either way because he's down in the third world in my book. He's getting off cheap Just imagine if he made these mistakes with your typical good-looking gringo lady up north and to that I say Anthony You know a lot of gringos that come down here are Rebounding from bad relationships up in the states In fact sometimes that's what pushes them over the edge one of the reasons they're down here in the first place to start fresh with business with friends and romantic relationships and often these love-lorn first-world guys fall for a pretty face not Realizing that they're dealing with ladies from a completely different culture. It happens all the time So when you come down beware
[20:52] Then Anthony changes gears in his email He makes a comment about the show I did just recently when I mentioned what my friend the longtime gringo English teacher at one of those expensive Helicopter K through 12 schools what he had to say about the happiness envy and jealousy Factors here in Latin America now if you recall that English teacher former backpacker has kept an eye on that Happiness factor in all classes of Latin society and he sees how happiness deteriorates in a community When relatives up north in the states send back those gringo dollars called remissas and that poor or middle-class family on the Receiving end down here uses that money or some of it to show off to their neighbors that my
[21:40] gringo English teacher buddy says is When greed and envy said in and that happiness factor takes a nosedive anyway, just to revisit that happiness theme and the Deterioration of it just a little bit Anthony has something to say about it He continues his email by saying I agree because jealousy is a huge problem in the black community up in the states I only viewed this from afar because I didn't grow up like that myself But from a distance, I am though very familiar with the idea that you can have nice things in the hood But overdo it and you'll then become a mark I can tell you that it turns out that there's a sort of a economic Equilibrium in the hood up in the states that is that if violated tends to lead to grand theft
[22:27] Kidnappings and murders which is one of the many reasons why successful blacks have moved out of mostly black areas now In regards to that if you or your listeners are curious I know you were talking about rappers in the US just go to Youtuber Google or start page and look for interviews with ice cube or iced tea and they explain why they don't live in the hood anymore Okay, then Anthony has a final comment about Latins living up in the states the ones that are sending u.s Dollars remisses down on a regular basis to their home country if you remember I mentioned that when those remittances come many smart Latins up north sending down that money Don't just give it away to the folks back home But they use it to build a fully first world style retirement home
[23:15] Fully knowing they can retire like kings and queens on a third of what they'd have to spend up in the first world So now Anthony makes the same sort of comment He says it looks as if because of those remittances Latins who came up to the states in the 80s are now returning back to Latin America with lots of u.s Dollars to exchange into the local currency and are moving up an economic class or two or even three Okay, it's me again. Now. Here's what you didn't know The average family of four in the US makes about 50 to 55 thousand a year Whereas the average latin american family who are naturalized in the states or second-generation latin americans make between 30 to 35 thousand For a family of four and it's been estimated that the average latin
[24:01] Immigrant family mostly illegal and off the books make between 20 and 25 grand a year for a family of four now get this It's the illegal families up north that are sending back money to build their so-called retirement homes in the old hood Why because they don't know any better They show off by building the best house in the crappiest neighborhood Whereas it's the u.s Latinos that have been naturalized and the second-generation latinos in the states who often build First-world style retirement homes in nice neighborhoods in latin america That's one of the big differences between illegals up in the states and naturalized latins and why the majority of Naturalized and second-generation lands do not want the u.s. To loosen up its immigration policies
[24:48] They just don't want the poor and the huddled masses from latin america Coming in and hoarding in on what they consider their territory and giving them who are now good solid citizens a bad name Anyway, that said finally today. I'm always getting emails about that supposed Nicaragua canal Which is touted as the biggest human construction project ever which I'm betting will never get finished Anyway, one of the questions people seem to be hitting me with about that canal is what is that old skunk-faced ex-sandinista warrior? Daniel Ortega get out of it. Well for one thing he's quoted as saying he hopes in fact believes the new canal Will make Nicaragua the richest latin american country which kind of makes me laugh because the word down here in latin america
[25:37] Is that he's already gotten around ten million bucks himself, and they haven't even broken ground on the thing yet now You might say well I hear it was the government of Nicaragua that got the ten million bucks in startup Greece Well, just remember Ortega is the Nicaraguan government. He's been president for 18 years now I ask you other than a pure dictatorship. Can you think of any democratic country? That's had the same president for 18 years. Nope not possible, right? Oh, and by the way, you didn't know that they don't have all the money yet to finish that canal, don't you? It's claimed that the canal will cost 50 billion dollars That's what the Nicaraguan Congress thinks but outside experts are saying it'll be double that a hundred billion
[26:24] So then how much is this Chinese telecom magnet have the guy that's putting this all together? Well, they say he's just shy of about ten billion dollars right now So how's that gonna work? Oh, and by the way, here's another kicker Did you know that the Nicaraguan Congress in 2013 voted to give this guy his name is Wang Jing Sounds like a Chinese Venerable disease, doesn't it? Anyway, somehow he got the Nicaraguan Congress to give him total land expropriation powers and full tax exemption status as well as full exemptions from business and commercial startup Regulations to including a free pass on environmental laws and environmental impact statements Like one Nicaraguan lawyer told me for ten million bucks in Greece
[27:12] You could buy off the whole Nicaraguan Congress and the next five Congresses, too Oh, and what about that small problem of Wang not even having 20% of the money to finish the thing? Oh, and by the way, depending on which economist you talk to, the final cost of the canal will equal four to ten times the yearly GDP of the entire country South of the border Down Mexico you've been listening to the expat files living in Latin America coming to you twice a week from somewhere south of the border Email me the expat files at gmail.com and don't forget to check out expat wisdom calm to sign up for your free Reports on Latin America. See you next time nos vemos