Episode Summary
In this episode, Johnny Mueller explores the unique and often chaotic traffic dynamics in Latin America, focusing on the prevalence of motorcycle use and the challenges of enforcement. He highlights that motorcycles are common due to their affordability, with some bikes selling for as low as $50. Many riders lack proper licenses and often evade roadblocks by using evasive maneuvers like U-turns or speeding through. Enforcement is lax, with police typically only stopping a small percentage of vehicles, and motorcycles being stopped even less frequently. Fines for non-compliance are usually applied to the vehicle owner rather than the rider, leading to a significant number of motorcycles not being renewed. Certain motorcyclists, such as those carrying heavy loads or multiple passengers, are more likely to be stopped, and police often use human shields to block their path. Johnny also humorously notes that high-speed chases are rare, and when they do occur, they are usually for politicians or other high-profile individuals.
Johnny also discusses the legal requirements for motorcyclists in Latin America, including the mandatory fluorescent vests with license numbers and stenciled license plates on helmets. He explains that these measures are intended for law enforcement to identify and report lawbreakers, but he criticizes the effectiveness of such laws due to widespread corruption. He also touches on the issue of cell phone theft, particularly among the middle and lower middle classes, and advises expats to avoid certain areas and transportation methods to stay safe.
The segment then shifts to the cultural emphasis on family gatherings among Latin Americans, highlighting how successful individuals often host extravagant events to showcase their status. Johnny notes that even those with multiple cars may lack significant savings, attributing this to the 'gringo way' of wanting to appear wealthy. He also mentions the complexity of family dynamics, where expats who marry into Latin families are often drawn into numerous events, sometimes leading to financial strain. Johnny uses the example of Eddie, an expat, who is frequently dragged to family gatherings, leading to financial and emotional strain. The segment also touches on the broader issue of cell phone theft in Latin America, emphasizing that it primarily affects the lower and middle classes and how the culture of showing off influences behavior, even in the face of risk.
In another segment, Johnny discusses how expats in Latin America are often judged by their possessions, particularly their smartphones and cars. He explains that locals often equate these items with one's social status, and expats without high-end items may face questions or stereotypes. Johnny highlights the prevalence of stolen smartphones, especially in urban areas, and explains how they are often stolen from upscale individuals in their cars, particularly women. He offers practical advice, such as using dark polarized windows to avoid detection.
Johnny also discusses the issue of motorcycle riders in Latin America and the effectiveness of laws requiring them to wear fluorescent vests and helmets. He highlights that while these laws are intended to make riders identifiable and deter criminal activity, they are largely ineffective due to widespread law-breaking and the fact that only the rider is required to wear the gear, allowing criminals to hide their identities. He also points out that even motorcycle cops often break these rules, further undermining the laws' purpose.
In another segment, Johnny discusses the disparity in motorcycle laws, particularly the jacket and helmet law, which only applies to motorcycles under 400 cc's. He argues that this law is a form of classism and favoritism, as it benefits high-end bike owners, including politicians and wealthy Latin families, who lobby to be exempt from such regulations. Johnny highlights the 'coolness factor' of expensive bikes and how they are associated with a certain social status, which is not shared by cheaper, 'rice burner' bikes. He also mentions that the law was written in a way that excludes high-end bikes, and that this exclusion is a deliberate effort to protect the interests of those who own and promote such bikes.
Johnny then shifts focus to the superficiality of wealthy individuals who buy expensive motorcycles like Harleys, often losing interest and eventually selling or abandoning them. He contrasts this with the real 'posers' he refers to as BMW riders. He then discusses motorcycle cops in Latin America, highlighting the small engine sizes (200 cc) and the lack of maintenance, leading to high rates of motorcycle failure. He concludes by referencing nicknames and prejudices among Latin American countries, using Nicaragua as an example of being a target of insults due to its perceived low status.
Finally, Johnny discusses the perception of Nicaraguans by other Latin American nationals, particularly Costa Ricans. He notes that Nicaraguans are often viewed as poor, uneducated, and from the 'backwoods,' and that many Nicaraguans themselves have an inferiority complex about their country. He also highlights the prejudice Costa Ricans hold toward Nicaraguans, including the belief that Nicaraguans do all the dirty work in Costa Rica and are treated poorly. Johnny shares that he has personally witnessed and heard these attitudes, indicating their prevalence in the region.
Topics
Traffic dynamics in Latin America, Motorcycle culture, Enforcement and law compliance, Cultural observations on expatriates and police interactions, Legal requirements for motorcyclists in Latin America, Corruption and law enforcement effectiveness, Cell phone theft and its impact on middle-class communities, Safety advice for expats in Latin America, Family gatherings in Latin America, Cultural emphasis on showing off, Expats and family dynamics, Social status and perception in Latin America
Chapters
00:00:00 Opening 00:00:19 Setting the Scene: Living in Latin America 00:00:20 Overview of the Show's Content 00:00:25 Introduction to the Show's Content 00:00:26 Introduction to the Show's Content 00:00:31 Introduction to the Show's Content 00:00:32 Introduction to the Topic: Motorcycle Prevalence 00:00:37 Motorcycle Prevalence and Affordability 00:05:34 Mandatory Safety Gear for Motorcyclists in Latin America 00:06:35 The Origins and Failures of Licensing Laws 00:07:01 Cell Phone Theft as the Number One Crime in Latin America 00:10:17 Successful Latin Americans and Family Events 00:10:56 Family Gatherings and Class Diversity 00:11:59 Expats and Family Dynamics 00:13:18 Cell Phone Theft and Cultural Behavior 00:15:14 Why People Judge Expats by Their Possessions in Latin America 00:16:24 The Cultural Norms of Status and Security in Latin Society 00:17:18 The Prevalence of Smartphone Theft and Its Targets 00:18:11 Corruption and Crime in Latin America: The Role of Motorcycles 00:18:36 The Intended Purpose of Motorcycle Identification Laws 00:20:20 The Fundamental Flaw in Motorcycle Identification Laws 00:21:04 The Coolness Factor of High-End Bikes and the Jacket and Helmet Law 00:21:18 The Law's Exemption for High-End Bikes and the Influence of Wealthy Owners 00:22:37 Lobbying by High-End Bike Dealerships and the Exemption from Laws 00:23:56 The Superficiality of Wealthy Motorcycle Enthusiasts 00:24:27 Real Posers: BMW Riders and Motorcycle Cops 00:24:44 Engine Sizes and Maintenance Issues in Latin American Motorcycle Cops 00:26:33 Cultural Nicknames and Prejudices in Latin America 00:26:58 Perception of Nicaraguans by Other Latin Nationals 00:27:18 Prejudice and Treatment of Nicaraguans in Costa Rica
Transcript
Automatically transcribed from the original recording; names and wording may contain errors.
[00:14] Hello there all you expat wannabes, I'm Johnny Mueller and you're listening to The Expat Files, living in Latin America. The show that tells you just what it's like to live, work, play and or retire down here in Latin America. It's a mix of the good, the bad, the ugly and the great, and it's all right here so let's get started. Now, for all of you who may have visited Latin America before, you'll notice that there are approximately twice as many people driving motorcycles as there are regular vehicles. For obvious reasons, number one is they're cheap. How cheap? I've seen in the motorcycle classified ads in the paper, bikes that apparently actually still run for 50 bucks. And although you're supposed to have a driver's license to ride one of those things, most people don't have one.
[01:00] So how do they continuously get away with that? Well, for one thing, you can easily spot a roadblock where the cops are stopping people in checking licenses etc. from a couple of blocks away. So what most motorcyclists do is just whip right by or make an illegal U-turn. You see that all the time. And the cops, they almost never pursue a guy that does that. Now remember, what we call roadblocks down here aren't actual roadblocks like you see in the movies. They don't put up a barricade and stop every car. It's nothing like that. You do have to slow down, but there's usually a lane or two free. And as you're gliding by, a standing cop will point at you and maybe blow a whistle and make a motion for you to pull over if you're the unlucky sap that gets tagged. And like I mentioned in a past show, they might only pull over one in a hundred cars.
[01:50] And as for motorcycles, well, they have a hell of a time getting them to pull over. They just take evasive actions and keep going. Because you see, since over half of them don't even have their driver's license, they know if they get stopped, they're going to get a hell of a fine. Which down here in Latin America is not applied to the driver, per se. It's applied to the person who bought the vehicle and registered it. And when they go down to pay their yearly renewal and get the sticker for the year, the fines are added to those fees. And if you don't pay them, you don't get the sticker. But since motorcycle drivers can nearly always evade roadblocks, by the way, motorcycles are called mottos down here, M-O-T-O-S, mottos. That's the plural. Anyway, like I said, they can almost always evade those roadblocks.
[02:37] So a lot of them figure, well, they don't have a license. And so the hell with the license plates sticker, too. Why should they even pay for that yearly fee? And because so many of them think that way, it's been estimated that over 60% of the motorcycles in Latin America never even renew their licenses once the motorcycle's been bought and registered initially. Because you see, that's when you get your license plate. And that yearly renewal sticker is not on the plate. It's supposed to be kept with the driver at all times. But since drivers can basically evade the cops indefinitely, many drivers figure, why buy it? No one's checking. So if at those police roadblocks, the cops pull over maybe one in a hundred cars,
[03:24] when it comes to motorcycles, they pull over only about one in a thousand. So you might wonder, which motorcyclist are they pulling over? Who are the unlucky ones? Well, it's the ones that have such huge loads that they drive very slow. And that includes the occasional motorcyclist that's got three or four passengers on board. So they're slow, hard to maneuver and can't take evasive action when they see a roadblock. And in that case, a cop will just step right out in front, wave his arms and basically block their path physically like a human shield. Now you long time listeners will remember what I said in our past show. That 95% of the time, if you go through one of those roadblocks, the cops just aren't prepared to get in their vehicles and chase you down. High speed chases, in fact, even low speed chases
[04:10] are not part of their game plan. Now, that's not to say that occasionally you won't see cops or two cops or three cop cars with their cherries flashing, whipping down the highway in a big hurry. So what's that all about? Well, 99% of the time, that's the escort for some scumbag politician who more than likely is on his way with his mistress to the IHOP. And I'm not kidding you, the IHOP is actually a scumbag politician hangout, bodyguards and bulletproof vehicles in the parking lot and all. I know it sounds crazy, you have to see it to believe it. And of course, you long time listeners will remember what I said about gringos, expats and police roadblocks too. It turns out motorcyclists aren't the only ones that can pull a fast one there.
[04:57] In fact, over the years, I've known a number of expat gringos who just roll a window down, wave at the cop and smile as they're being singled out by a cop to pull over. They don't stop, they just wave and keep rolling along. Like one old time expat told me, he's been giving the cops the wave and the smile for 8 or 10 years now. So far, he's never once stopped. And he's never been chased for doing that either. But anyway, as to the massive quantities of motorcycle drivers down here and scooter drivers, one thing that you will notice right away when you're down here in Latin America is that in most countries, practically all of them now, motorcyclists are required to wear a vest called a chaleco. And it's usually a fluorescent color like orange or lime green. Extremely ugly and stupid looking,
[05:44] but it's the price you have to pay for driving a motorcycle down here. But that's not all. On the back of that vest, the law requires that the license number of the motorcycle be stenciled on it. Not to mention in every Latin country now, the helmet law applies and on the back of the helmet, the law requires that the license plate number be stenciled on that too. So in other words, according to the law, when you're driving behind a motorcyclist, you should be able to clearly see his license plate numbers three different ways. On the plate itself, on his vest and on his helmet. And gringos wonder, why is that? Why are motorcyclists living license plate billboards? Well, you'd think that would be an easy and obvious question to answer. You might think it's for the cops or you to identify and report
[06:31] motorcyclists who are breaking the law. That would seem logical, right? Well, I guess it did start out that way. But brain dead politicians being the lowest form of life screwed that one up too. Oh, and by the way, speaking of corrupt politicians and cops, I was talking about that, wasn't I? Anyway, I often get the same question asked in emails as I do from people at my seminars. They asked, Johnny, are all Latin American politicians and cops corrupt? To which I reply, I haven't met them all yet. The fact is, the number one crime in Latin America is cell phone theft. Now, get this. When it comes to middle and lower middle class Latin Americans, cell phone theft is out of control. But do you think those scumbag politicians give a damn about the middle
[07:19] or lower middle classes except to get their votes at election time? Nope. So ever since cell phones hit big down here five or ten years ago, politicians and legislators just avoided the subject altogether. The fact is, just the other day I was at a house party and I asked three teenage girls who were sitting around the guacamole tray what their experience was with street crime and all three of them admitted to having their cell phones ripped off multiple times. And that always seemed to happen when walking down the street with a crowd of people and or riding public transportation or on the chicken bus. Now, you see, these were middle class young ladies whose parents did have a junky car, but it was used most exclusively for dad to go back and forth to work every day,
[08:04] not to haul the kids around. The fact is, for middle class families, gas is way too expensive down here for them to haul their kids back and forth to McDonald's and the shopping mall or even school. Thus, every day they have to ride the chicken bus or public transportation. And since they are middle class and their parents between them make about five or six hundred bucks a month, they live in the kind of scruffy neighborhoods that I don't recommend for gringos or expats. So anyway, like these three young ladies told me, they all had the sad experience of having their cell phones ripped off at least three times on public transportation or walking through crowded areas in the middle and lower middle class areas of town. Which should be a warning to all you gringo tourists and expat gunnabees and wannabees.
[08:51] That said, before you move into or hang around a big city in Latin America, be sure to map out the good, the bad and the ugly areas beforehand. Always stick to the upscale business districts and the nicer areas, but that should be obvious. And as far as transportation, believe me, you don't even want to ride the chicken bus just for a good photo op to send home to your friends. And about that business of walking down the street and getting your cell phone ripped off, remember, these are middle class Latin girls, middle class Latin style, not gringo style. And they live and hang around in areas that gringos and expats would never be caught dead in. So you might ask, how did I end up at a party with a mix of people like that? People who live in areas that I make an effort to stay away from myself.
[09:37] Well, that's because you see, Latins are very big on family get togethers and they invite everyone they know, including their shoestring relatives and friends from the old neighborhood. And that might include grandma and grandpa and the other hayseed cousins from way out in the Finca. You'll recognize them at the party because they're the ones wearing the cowboy hats. I'm not kidding. No, not the ladies, just the guys. Now, for many upscale Latins who weren't born with a silver spoon in their mouths, the old neighborhood is the one they grew up in when they were poor kids. You know, before they made their mark in life, started a business, got educated, became a lawyer or optometrist or whatever, and were successful enough to move out into the burbs. And as is the Latin custom, successful Latins who've climbed up in the world
[10:25] like to show everybody in the family that they've made it. So when they throw a family party like a birthday or quinceaños or a wedding, they go all out, which is why, according to one banker that I know, he told me on more than one occasion that even upscale Latins with two or three nice cars in the driveway often don't have a thousand bucks in the bank. And to that I say, why not? It's the gringo way and they're nothing if not gringo wannabes, right? But where was I? Oh yeah. Talking about Latin American family get-togethers. If you by chance get invited to one, you'll see there'll be a huge mix of various classes of people, often with representative samples from the very high class to the very lowest rung of the middle class, as long as their relatives, they get invited.
[11:12] And believe me, if it's a big event, they generally can't exclude anyone, even the worst black sheep of the family. That's just the way it is. Family is everything down here. Which is why when expats hook up with a Latin girlfriend or boyfriend or marry a Latin person, they find out soon enough they're also married to that person's family. And the only way to avoid being sucked in to every single family event and trauma is to move far enough away from the family nexus so that the cost of a tank of gas or a long ride on the chicken bus is prohibitive to them, not you. Now this might sound familiar, but as it turns out, Latins always seem to throw more party than they're financially capable of. So what's that all about? Well, you know, expat Eddie.
[11:59] Due to the fact that his fiancé has a huge family, he's been dragged to so many family get-togethers that he just can't take it anymore. And you know, sometimes he calls me out of the blue just to help him brainstorm excuses so he doesn't have to go to the next one. And believe me, between the both of us, we've come up with some doozies, which is yet another reason why his fiancé doesn't want him to hang around with me anymore. In fact, believe it or not, her stepfather is one of 20 children, all, which is even crazier, from the same mother. So like she says, she's got over a hundred stepcousins on her father's side alone, which means Eddie gets dragged to a lot of family shindigs. Unfortunately, he can't move a gas tank away from her family
[12:47] because he's got his restaurant business to attend to down there. Anyway, Eddie says that his fiancé's relatives, after putting on a big show, a big party, often end up eating free holies and tortillas for the next month. That's what happens when you blow a wad on a big party just to impress the relatives. But that never happens up in the States, right? Come to think of it, up in Chicago, I had a relative who took out a mortgage to pay for his kid's wedding. So I guess the whole world is crazy, right? Now, I mentioned that the number one crime in Latin America is cell phone theft and that nearly all of it takes place at the street level with the poor and the middle class folks who have to ride the bus and walk through busy sidewalk crowds in iffy neighborhoods.
[13:33] So what does that have to do with motorcycle drivers who are human license plates billboards? Well, the fact is it's only in the last two or three years has all that come to pass. I'm talking about the helmet with the number on it and the fluorescent vesting. Well, you see, first I have to mention that that cell phone theft thing breaks down like this. Over 95% of those thefts occur on the street or in chicken buses. And the fact is those thefts are nearly always low end cell phones, not high end smartphones because people on the street just can't afford them. Not that middle and lower class folks wouldn't carry a high end cell phone if they could afford one, even though it's dangerous to carry it on the street. But you know, down here it is all about the show. So if they had a smartphone,
[14:19] the high risk of theft would be a sacrifice they'd be willing to make. Then I guess a victim could get some satisfaction in bragging to his friends about the expensive high end iPhone that he got stolen. I guess the twisted logic here is it's infinitely better to say you had your Mercedes Benz stolen than your Hyundai. Since a Benz implies more class, right? That's why I quit trying to figure out Latin logic. Now there's something here that you have to understand. If you're like me and you don't have a smartphone, you have a cheap throwaway model, that's 15 or 20 bucks. Sooner or later, some Latin person is going to say to you like they say to me, you're a gringo. Why don't you have a smartphone? Or better yet, you're a gringo.
[15:06] Why don't you drive an SUV? Why you have such a small car? Well, you probably know this already, but the reason why you get local Latin saying things to you like that, it's because to them, you are what your car is. And if you can't afford a car, you are what your cell phone is. In other words, people judge your status by what you drive and since most people don't drive down here, they judge your status by the kind of phone you have. I know, I know. Pretty ridiculous, huh? But this is Latin America and this show is called The Expat Files Living in Latin America. So these are things you might want to know. So anyway, know this. When you come down here, if you don't have a smartphone or a high-end beautiful car, sooner or later, you're going to get 50 questions from your new Latin buddies. Because you know, for one thing,
[15:51] they stereotype us gringos as being rich. So if you don't have a high-end phone or a high-end car, they're going to think you're either cheap or broke. So my advice is don't go into big explanations, just keep them guessing. Because believe me, I have tried to explain the low-profile lifestyle to Latins that I know, but they just don't get it. Their eyes just glaze over. Because you see, they want all that stuff and they love the high-profile that goes with it. They're more than happy to sacrifice security for status. They do it all the time. That's just the way the Latin society is. So like I said, forget the explanations and keep them guessing. But back to that number one crime, stolen cell phones. Anyway, about 3% or less of the cell phones stolen
[16:37] are high-end cell phones, iPhones and such, smartphones. Now I'll ask you, where do you think those phones are stolen? When 90 to 95% of the population can't afford to drop 200 to 1000 bucks on a smartphone. Those high-end smartphones are usually stolen from people in their cars while stopped at an intersection or in a bottleneck. In other words, when clueless upscale Latins are driving down the road in their SUVs, gabbing away on their smartphones and crawling through traffic, well, they're the prime targets at big city intersections. And as you might imagine, 9 out of 10 people who get a phone stolen that way are women. Naturally because they scare easier and won't put up any resistance. So how's that happen anyway?
[17:25] Well, a motorcycle pulls up alongside of them at a stoplight. A motorcycle almost always with two people on it. Then the guy on the back of the motorcycle will tap the window with a gun and that person will almost always roll down the window and hand the phone over automatically. And that's why, by the way, you should always have the darkest polarized windows installed that you can get. And believe me, down here in Latin America, there's no rules on that. You can have it as black as you want. And there are little hole-in-the-wall shops everywhere that'll do it for around 50 or 60 bucks. That way if you're going to use the phone, no one will ever see that you have one. Not to mention, no one will ever know if it's a man or a woman driving or if you've got other people in the car. So here's how it works out.
[18:11] Since all the high-end corrupt politicians and scumbag government workers drive nice cars and their wives and mistresses and family members drive nice cars too, naturally these empty-headed sociopaths have the latest in smartphones too. The ironic thing is many of these government ass wipes and their families have their cell phones stolen like that. So guess what? Throughout Latin America, governments have been passing laws so that motorcycle drivers have to have their license number instantly identifiable, thus the bold number on the helmet and the vest. So in a way, it does sound like a good idea because that should dissuade bad guys on motorcycles because they'll be instantly identified, right? Wrong. The fact is,
[18:57] you just jump in a car and ride around any medium or large-sized city in Latin America and you'll see plenty of these motorcyclists in these colorful vests and helmets. But you'll also notice that between 5 and maybe 15% of motorcycle riders don't have helmets or vests at all. And some motorcyclists don't even have a license plate on their bike. Now, of course, they're breaking the law, but to say that the enforcement of those laws is spotty, well, that's being kind. And like I said, if a motorcycle rider is breaking the law, for whatever reason, and he sees a police roadblock, let's say, he just makes an illegal U-turn and speeds up. The fact is, if you're on the road in the city in Latin America, you'll find that about every 5 or 10 minutes you'll see someone on a motorcycle
[19:42] blatantly breaking some kind of law. If it's not simply running red lights like they all do, often in traffic they'll just go up on the sidewalk to get around something or go the wrong way down a one-way street just because it's easier. Oh, and not to mention, they'll be driving 3, 4, and even 5 on a motorcycle at a time. And the fact is, even motorcycle cops don't wear helmets half the time. Talk about role models, huh? So anyway, you might ask, have those helmet and fluorescent jacket laws helped? Are there less cell phones being stolen on the road? The answer is, no. Because, now get this, there's a fundamental flaw in the whole setup. Only the driver is required to wear the helmet and the vest. So the guy riding it back,
[20:30] if he's a crook, can effectively completely block out the numbers on the helmet and the vest of the driver on the bike. And the legislators couldn't see that coming. What a bunch of brain dead nitwits, huh? And here's something that's gotta make you laugh. Or cry, depending on your mood. If you happen to be driving around in Latin America and you see someone on an expensive Harley or BMW or Ducati, etc., you'll notice they're not wearing a fluorescent vest or helmet like that. So they're breaking the law too, right? Nope, they're not. And you won't believe this. It's because of, guess what? The coolness factor of those expensive high-end bikes. The way politicians have written that law, it only applies
[21:16] to motorcycles under 400 cc's. In other words, that jacket and helmet law applies only to drivers of those inexpensive rice burners and not to high-end expensive bikes. Because you see, a lot of scumbag politicians and high-end government officials strive themselves to own Harleys and belong to Harley and BMW clubs and such. It's, of course, the upscale wanna-be gringo thing to do, isn't it? Now, some of you out there might be thinking, well, that's probably okay because it's the people with the Harleys and BMWs and stuff, they're not gonna be stealing cell phones. They have money, obviously. So maybe after all, the politicians did do the logical thing, which would really be a miracle
[22:01] or a mistake, I guess. Well, I'm here to tell you that's not the reason why there's discrimination between riders of high-end and low-end bikes like that. And by the way, when I mentioned motorcycle discrimination like that to a couple of smart Latin people that I know, they thought for a second and said, yeah, you're right. That is an obvious case of discrimination. Never thought of that. Once again, it took a gringo to pick up on it. So what do you call that then? The gringo disadvantage? It is a blatant case of favoritism and classism because you see, the inside story is a Latin guy who owns one of the Harley dealerships down here told me that it was the high-end bike dealerships that lobby Latin governments to be exempt from that law and others like it. Because the vast majority of their clients
[22:46] are high-end rich, pretentious Latins, a lot of them high-end scumbag government officials and politicians who would in fact quit buying high-end bikes like that altogether if they had to wear a fluorescent jacket and a helmet with a license on it. That would just completely ruin the cult of Harley effect if you know what I mean. I know gringos for one would just laugh their asses off if they saw something like that. Talk about negative coolness factor. I can see why that law scared the crap out of those dealers. And since, as you might have figured, a lot of those high-end motorcycle dealerships are actually owned or partially owned by wealthy Latin families, they have the connections and pull to get a free pass
[23:31] on pretty much anything for people who ride high-end bikes. Now, I don't want to come off like a snob here, but you should see when these pretentious Latin jerks have their bike rallies. These are the weekend warrior types, you know. All their leather Harley clothes and paraphernalia are brand new and perfectly creased. None of that scuffed, ragged and worn leather like real Harley riders up north. These guys are true poser wannabes if you know what I mean. Sure, they've got all the money in the world to buy toys like that. They've got garages full of expensive toys and hobbies that they lost interest in a long time ago. And that's why after a year or so most of these guys end up selling their Harley. Or it just ends up gathering dust and halo monsters in the garage. They really have no idea
[24:17] what the legacy and cult of Harley is all about. For them, it's all about the show and having the money to be a gringle wannabe. But if you want to see some real posers, check out the BMW bike riders. But I guess you heard enough of that. Just one more thing about motorcycles. This time, motorcycle cops. Now, I don't know if I've mentioned this before, but do you know what the average engine size is for a Latin American motorcycle cop? I'll give you a hint what it is up north. Last time I checked, Chicago cops were driving motorcycles with 900 to 1200 cc's. So I can imagine if you guys and gals out there would like to make a guess you'd aim low like maybe 450 or 550 cc, right? Well, guess what?
[25:03] The average cubic centimeter rating for all motorcycle cops in Latin America is 200 cc's. Kind of brings to mind a souped up weed whacker or lawnmower engine, you know? Now, there is one good thing about a 200 cc engine. It does get about a hundred miles to the gallon. Maybe high gas mileage was all they were shooting for. Who knows? However, once again, I'll beat the drum and say it's all about maintenance. Or more precisely, the lack thereof. Maintenance? No, but repairs? Yes. They know how to do repairs down here like whizzes, but not much in the public sector, which is fully infiltrated by lazy and competent slugs. However, in the private sector, when something breaks, they're on it and they fix it.
[25:48] However, regular scheduled maintenance? Forget about it. Why do you think that after only one year in service, fully half 50% of all Latin American motorcycles used by cops are out of service and pushing up daisies in the junkyard. Or cacti. Take your pick. Enough said about that. In fact, way too much said about that. Anyway, if you recall, on the last show, I was talking about how people born in different Latin American countries have their own nicknames for each country's citizens. And us gringos and first world visitors pick up on those nicknames eventually too. And I mentioned that Latins have their own subtle prejudices about neighboring countries. And thus, some of the nicknames for people aren't so nice. And that's one thing
[26:33] that most gringos are absolutely clueless about. Now, I mentioned, as with Nicaragua, the word nica, which everyone seems to use, is the same word that Latins use for hospital bedpan. So it's an insult. But the word is so ubiquitous. When you use it, they'll smile and just suck it up. Because the rest of Latin America always picks on little Nicaragua as the low man on the totem pole. Other Latin nationals consider them to be more or less poor, backwoods, uneducated hayseeds. And you know, I've noticed that most Nicaraguans I've met suffer from a little bit of an inferiority complex about their country. Oh sure, they're proud to say that they're from Nicaragua, but it's obvious they're used to taking a backseat to all the other Latin nationalities.
[27:20] And it's especially sad to see that they do all the dirty work in Costa Rica. Costa Ricans harbor a lot of prejudice and basically treat Nicaraguans like crap. I know because I've seen it and heard it. You've been listening to The Expat Files, living in Latin America, coming to you twice a week from somewhere south of the border. Email me, theexpatfiles at gmail.com. And don't forget to check out expatwisdom.com to sign up for your free reports on Latin America. See you next time. Nos vemos.