#1032 – The Expat Files: History, Science, and Survival in Latin America

Automatically transcribed from the original recording; names and wording may contain errors.

[00:00] South of the border down Mexico way That's where I fell in love when the stars above came up to play and now as I wonder Hello there all you ex-pat wannabes I'm Johnny Mueller and you're listening to the expat files living in Latin America the show that tells you just what it's like to live Workplay and or retire down here in Latin America It's a mix of the good the bad the ugly and the great and it's all right here. So let's get started All right, you're back once again with me Johnny And I've got a front-row seat but at a very safe distance from the state-side first world shit show first Latin American factoid Did you know that in 1562 the Roman Catholic priest Diego de Landa Calderon?

[00:48] He burned 10,000 Mayan manuscripts or codices as they're called He destroyed so many that only less than five Exist for scholars to study today now this priest was so proud of what he'd done He actually made a statement in the Spanish court He's on record as saying quote we found a large number of Mayan books as they contain nothing But superstition and lies of the devil we burned them all After the big bonfire the king of Spain and the rest of the royal court many of whom were bishops and Cardinals They were pleased and wholeheartedly approved and the Cardinal elevated him and gave him a promotion the moral of that story Well, I don't have to tell you I think you know All right, and here's one more crazy historical fact now

[01:34] We all know about Einstein's theory of general relativity in that it actually has many practical uses in astronomy GPS transmissions Communications, etc. Now he wrote the first paper on that theory in 1915 But there was really no scientific way to prove that in a laboratory or in the field They just didn't have good enough instruments back then now a lot of scientists didn't like Einstein. They were jealous of him He just pumped out too many revolutionary ideas and papers at too young an age Besides he didn't go to the proper schools You know academic jealousy is a real and terrible thing ruins a lot of careers and lines of research too after all if your colleagues are jealous and don't like you and they have the ear of research institution academics and Government appropriations committees. Well, let's just say if you don't kiss their asses, you won't get any grants

[02:21] So anyway, Einstein has this theory of relativity and he's just becoming world famous for some other theories of his like his revolutionary paper on black Body radiation, for example. So anyway, Einstein has this other brilliant theory in 1915 general relativity And it couldn't be proven physically only mathematically. Well, here's what you didn't know in 1931 a book came out the title a hundred authors against Einstein and in it 28 different PhD scientists contributed an essay each each one describing why they thought his theory of general relativity was completely wrongheaded They said it was impossible a bad precedent to publish and step backward for science then seven years later in 1938

[03:07] There was a very rare solar eclipse and that allowed scientists if they were on different parts of the earth To measure light coming from the edge of the Sun So once and for all they were able to measure the bending of light due to the Sun's gravity Proving that Einstein was a hundred percent correct. So then what's the point? Well, just think about all the fake science coming out of this covid it thing and how months and months ago Various different research scientists and doctors worldwide treating their own patients that came down with symptoms of the disease They found there was a huge improvement even cures just by using vitamin C vitamin D Selenium a cheap $10 Antiparasitic drug called Ivermectin magnesium and chlorquinone. Meanwhile the status quo

[03:53] Boughton paid for big pharma doctors and researchers. They called those guys using the cheap drugs and vitamins charlatans and liars they were canceled by social media and some of them even fired Countless reputations and careers were ruined fast forward to right about now suddenly even in the lame Street media articles are popping up saying things like vitamin D will cut your chance of covid by 60% and When symptoms arise if you take quark when alone that drug will drastically reduce your chances of having to go to the hospital and Ending up on one of those ventilators, which for some is the kiss of death in itself, you know what i'm talking about So the act of certain doctors and researchers entrenched in the system like dr Falsey pissing on doctors and colleagues that don't fit the government and big pharma party line

[04:43] Well, as you just heard from the einstein example, that's nothing new Oh and in the end, what do you think happened to all those scientists who called einstein a fraud and a liar in print? Nothing and that's exactly what's going to happen to all those weenie healthcare professionals that poo poo the idea of vitamin c D ivermectin hydroxychloroquine, etc, etc doing any good for patients It's nothing for them to destroy the repetitions of the real doctors in the trenches Who are using this stuff and finding it works? The lesson here is if you're a researcher and you create a drug that big pharma can paint you'll get all the grants You could possibly need but if you discover a cure or a treatment that happens to be a commonly used generic drug Or vitamin more than likely you'll get no press at all

[05:28] Where shit like they did with chloroquinone and ivermectin they'll say it's dangerous to take it Even though millions of people have been taking it for dozens of years to treat malaria and intestinal parasites Well, it took a year of mainstream bashing of these doctors and their cheap treatments But now finally the usual suspects are coming around because those cheap treatments work And the public is catching on enough said about that All right Now I have a little expat insider seminar update as you might imagine since I had to postpone the january event to the covidiot stuff I've been holding off on picking new dates Just waiting for the word from guatemalan immigration and healthcare authorities as to when they're gonna start honoring The rapid covidiot tests at the airport

[06:14] That's what's been holding us up because as you know that piece of crap pcr test Take some time at least one day sometimes two to get the results back and as you know There are various rapid testing procedures Some of them take 15 minutes some up to two hours And they are starting to be accepted in most airports and countries around the world In fact many airports are setting up testing sites right on the premises For example, I just got noticed that they're doing it in all the big airports in columbia Soon all latin american countries will be on board with those saliva and rapid blood antigen tests So then when will that happen in guatemala? That's where we'll be doing our seminar, of course Well according to inside sources that could be happening within a couple of weeks in any event The new seminar dates will be selected to give all attendees at least one month's notice

[07:01] So that they can make travel arrangements without too much undue stress or pressure after all most people who signed up for the postponed January seminar had already booked their airline tickets and they've got a refund or a credit So now they'll have to rebook and shuffle dates, etc Oh just one more thing no matter what you've been hearing from the lame stream press, you know bill gates and the doctor falsies of the world You know the ones with pharmaceutical patents that stand to make billions on this fiasco Well when the talking heads talk about a second wave or new variants as if there's some kind of new and catastrophic development The fact is that's what every virus does it changes and adapts? That's why every new flu season has a new variant of last year's virus And it's also true that no matter what you've been hearing true kovid it cases with actual symptoms are way way down

[07:52] Oh, and did you know it was recently reported that the cdc now admits only six to nine percent of reported kovid it deaths Were actually due to kovid it virus alone. That means technically by definition It's not really a pandemic at all But that's what they call it and for that screw up the entire world economy was shut down and everyone kicked into a permanent state of high anxiety And you know, it's not much consolation to realize that the history books will not be kind to the bureaucratic perpetrators of this But as they say every silver lining has a storm cloud or something like that So what's the silver lining? Well, how about the fact that montesuma's revenge is way down since the street vendors are now washing their hands at least once a day Oh, and you know, it'll be at least one year before countries and airlines start requiring travelers to get vaccines or a vaccine card

[08:42] Welcome to the gulag, huh step right this way black sheep to the right white sheep to the left However, this is latin america. So, you know rules are bent and broken all the time So you can bet there will be ways around it But you know just the idea looming that you'll have to have a vaccine card Should really light a fire under your butt to kick that plan b into high gear What i'm saying is this all you gringos and future expats coming to my next expat insider seminar Will not need a vaccination or vaccine card to travel But the seminar after that the following seminar most likely in january 2022, you know That's almost a year away By then you can figure vaccinations and vaccine cards will be mandatory My advice if you want to avoid the dangers of that do sign on to my upcoming seminar

[09:30] Just go to expat plan b.com and click on the seminar link and you'll get all the info So again, i'll remind you don't put it off because if you plan on coming to another one You'll most likely be forced to have a vaccine and get a vaccine card Are you good with that not me though? I know the average slug buys into all of that stuff even some very smart people too Hell my mother got the vaccine and she's got two phds But none of them are in science nor does she ever use an independent search engine other than google In other words, she like 95 percent of the rest of the world is manipulated by google ai and only sees what google fakebook twitter W-h-o and big pharma marketers want her to see but you knew that already right now speaking of ai On occasion I get emails from people saying johnny. I use google translate and it works pretty good

[10:18] But what about all those handheld translation devices? How's the state of the art with those things? Do they really work a hell of a lot better than google translate? Or am I better off sticking with google translate or just some of the free translation apps? Now, you know for a long time There have been apps on the phone besides google translate that do a pretty decent job of word for word translation You know each word translated one at a time But as you know, they can be very imperfect when it comes to accents and street lingo because you know Almost no one speaks the same way books paragraphs and sentences are written And you know, there was the promise some years back that you just be able to get an app Hold up your phone to someone who's speaking in spanish or japanese and you'll get the translation back right away However, the people that design those apps don't seem to have any understanding or appreciation of how languages really work

[11:07] After all they are programmers who didn't consult natives to check if their examples were accurate correct or if the verbs and nouns Were even in the right order So in effect you have all these nerds sitting at home or in cubicles designing translation apps Problem is there are just too many situations where a word has several different translation depending how you use it Here's an example and it's an extreme example. Did you know the word set s-e-t in english has 464 meanings in the oxford dictionary and the word run r-u-n has 396 entries in the oxford dictionary and as far as spanish The word low l-o can mean a ton of different things in english, too For example, it can mean it it can mean that which is it can mean what it can mean him or her or you

[11:55] All depending on the usage in context now as for most phone translation apps They do a pretty good job when you snap for example a picture of a sign or a menu or bulletin board But they could have real problems with the human voice and that was the state of it up to a couple of years ago now Things have changed dramatically since the introduction of ai into these systems So if you have one of those devices, i'm not talking about the apps now I'm talking about a standalone device cost around 100 to 300 bucks And there's 10 or so brands to choose from too Anyway, if you speak slowly into it in a standard kind of formal dialect without a heavy accent They will work pretty well, but that's ideally and here's how it usually goes you speak into it in proper english It'll translate into spanish in this case in proper spanish, maybe not 100 correct

[12:45] But to the latino or latina you're with they'll get the gist no problem most all the time All right, so far so good when you're speaking to them and the machine's doing the translating Problem is when they answer you or they've got something to say back to you unless they're a stickler for form or are the nerdy type They'll be using conversational street language and ai though very good for straight formal english or spanish Well, sometimes when confronted with street language spit out total gibberish though I have to admit those translation devices have really improved now if it was me and I just landed in latin america And I didn't know a lick of spanish I definitely shop around for one of those dedicated devices because if you're using a phone app Even if it's a pretty good one You're gonna get calls and messages and texts and ads linked to all the other apps and crap

[13:32] You got loaded into your phone Look, how many times have you been speaking to someone on your phone and sounds start dinging because you're getting calls and messages And the person on the other end is getting bombarded with their own crap and messages and ads too However, if you've got a dedicated little device and those things are only about a third the size of a smartphone You could just have that on hand all the time and use it at will no matter what's happening or going down with yourself But they ain't cheap and there are some really good ones out there But they're only really good if they're always connected to the cloud somewhere. That's why they perform so well They're constantly connected to very powerful AI via the cloud now personally I don't like using the cloud for much of anything because it's always available for others to look at or steal Though in the case of a translation device as long as you're not divulging secrets or credit card numbers

[14:21] That doesn't really matter in that case being connected to the cloud is a huge advantage Now if you want me to recommend one of those standalone devices I advise just do a search for the top 10 translation devices and pick one of those Now the good news is that this is the expat files living in latin america So you're translating back and forth from english to spanish and luckily for us spanish to english and vice versa Is one of the easier ai tasks ai being of course artificial intelligence Now most handheld devices will translate up to a hundred different languages and they're really good at some and really crappy at others And spanish happens to be at the top of the list for ease of translation and syntax That's a really good thing, too Now, I know most gringos and expats once they get down here will use some kind of app or dedicated translation device

[15:09] Problem is it could get to be a habit and a crutch you never get over It reminds me, you know when you're watching a movie and you click on the subtitles I watch movies with english subtitles once in a while Probably because i'm a little deaf from playing in a rock band all those years By the way a rocker down here is called a roquero Oh, and they've got a name for people who are into cryptocurrency and bitcoin, too They call them crypto moneros, or if you're just into bitcoin, you're a bitcoin arrow It's that ero ending thing again like for example carpenter carpenterro. Oh and speaking of bitcoin arrows I was talking to a depressed gringo the other day who owns a little coffee shop with sandwiches and such And naturally his business is suffering big time with the covidiot lockdowns people not working people stuck at home And he was kind of pumping me for business ideas

[15:56] He told me he had a year or so to go on his lease So he was stuck with it and he was hoping to jump start the place with a new idea or new name or something I said look everybody's nuts about crypto now Why don't you call it the bitcoin cafe put a bunch of bitcoin and crypto logos everywhere? Get one of those bitcoin atms installed switch your big screen tv's He's got three of them to permanently show crypto markets and youtube channels There are plenty of those then have some nice where crypto guys give classes So in the end just make it a crypto themed cafe and I guarantee you'll get all kinds of publicity The local tv stations and the papers will do features on you because bitcoin and crypto is all the rage right now Just like up in the states in fact practically every single gringo and expat I know is either dabbling in it or want to suck up every little bit of knowledge

[16:43] They can about it so they can dive in or at least test the waters and not just in bitcoin in Ethereum and all the defy coins too, you know the proverbial shit coins Because you know the thing is we're in a massive crypto bull market now and even if it dumps once in a while Traders will tell you that's how they make money no matter if it goes up or down The more volatility the more traders love it because they make their money on shorts and calls And on the arbitrage and spread between currencies now I'm not advising you do any of that kind of speculating yourself My personal strategy is just to buy and hold my strategy is simple But believe me fortunes are being made and some lost to every day in the crypto space and i'm absolutely convinced if Someone was to set up a bitcoin cafe I don't care what town you're in and even if you're smack on the gringo tourist trail where there really are no tourists anymore

[17:31] Well, there's always a smattering a place called the bitcoin cafe Can you imagine the great conversations that go on in a place like that? Because it really is true every bitcoiner I know or cryptocurrency guy seem to be well above average curious free-spirited and somewhat libertarian So if you're down here in latin america and you're looking for like-minded people to hang out with and talk to Well put it this way if I landed here in latin america just got my plan b going I got the hell out of that I think that's exactly what I would do rent out of space and open a bitcoin cafe Tell you what you'd have an instant clientele and the best kind of conversations you could imagine And the cool thing is as of now, I don't know if anyone who's done it yet Now remember in this age of covet you really want to avoid brick and mortar businesses at all costs

[18:17] But when you can fill or discover a really cool niche That's another thing and you've got that strange advantage that after a year of this covetia thing There's just so many empty and bankrupt storefronts and restaurants If you paid six months up front, you'd probably get six months for free, but I digress. Where were we? Oh, yeah Talking about those translation programs, you know, google translate and those audio translators have been just a boom For the cross cultural mating and dating scene. In fact, my own brother up in chicago has a latina girlfriend now He's never met though. They're on the chat apps all the time He speaks a little spanish about a two or three on the 10 scale and she speaks zero english So truthfully their relationship would not even exist if it wasn't for google translate But you know, it doesn't matter how good or perfect the translation is

[19:04] Those devices or apps will never convey subtle vocal cues. We all have when we speak to people You know like how you could immediately tell if someone's pissed off being facetious sarcastic happy sad drunk Whatever your translation app or standalone device will never pick up on that Well, maybe down the line when ai gets really good. Just don't count on it. Not for a while. Anyway So as it turns out just in the last few years There have been all kinds of cross cultural romances going down online Which is all right. I guess until you actually have to sit down and meet that person face to face What are you gonna do pass your device back and forth like a hot potato? I don't know. It could be a bit odd and for sure it will wear on you I'll let you know because my brother's flying down on the first of march here to latin america to meet that girl for the first time

[19:49] We'll see how it goes. I'll keep you posted when by the way They didn't find each other on one of those latin cubit dating sites Those things are just rife with fraud and gold diggers. You heard me do a show on that maybe a year ago He actually met her through someone I know here in latin america who then hooked him up two or three months ago It's a very interesting and cool story. I'll tell you about it sometime All right changing gears now you long-time listeners No, i've never really recommended nikaragua for expats and gringos or to have a plan be there Not because it isn't a beautiful country with nice people and of course, they've got their share of narcos too Problem is it's run by a former nikaraguan sandinista gorilla a rapist pedophile Who's morphed into a socialist dictator? You know the name daniel ortega now the first couple of terms. He was in office

[20:36] He was fairly benevolent because all that chinese money was pouring in and he had the big skim going But now that there won't be any chinese canal going through nikaragua The funds have dried up and he's showing his true colors But you know most of us gringos and expats who've been living here in latin america more than a dozen or so years We knew he was going to be bad news I've mentioned that many times on the show However, people do what they're going to do and some gringos and expats who came to my expat insider seminars ended up in nikaragua Anyway, some of them even started brick-and-mortar businesses on a certain coastal pacific town of about 25 000 people san Juan del suer It's really a funky gone native surfer dude town and it is that one town in nikaragua That's got the most gringos per capita. So then you might ask with this kovidia crap

[21:23] What's happening there now with all the gringos and their businesses? Well, let me read you this email that just came in from rob. He says Hola, johnny. Did you know that the nikaraguan government is now threatening and extorting gringo and expat residents? Fact is he says nikaragua is changing the goalposts on residents and changing the durations for residency requirements They've jacked up the price for it too and are calling in and grilling current residents in interrogations Asking questions about their relationship with dissident political affiliations whether real or imagined He says suddenly gringo residents are being grilled By an increasingly paranoid and simultaneously cash strapped ruling elite With nikaraguan residency requirements for monthly income levels being quite low around 800 bucks a month as I recall

[22:14] It was always a booming expat plan b for backpackers and bargain basement gringo types Who were convinced that if you stayed living up in the states, you'd just be circling the toilet bowl along with the turds So in effect, he says pure full-on bureaucratic greed and lunacy has come to nikaragua So what's a gringo to do live in a van down by a tropical river close to a border So you could wander like a classic gypsy back and forth as the border laws wax and wane with the u.s Secretly calling the immigration shots or johnny. He says adopt my strategy, which is to live on a boat Anyway johnny keep up the super south of the border reporting much appreciated and rare in today's fake news world of the web Signed ohaka bob. All right, bob. Thanks for that and bob frankly

[22:59] You know all i've been hearing for the past couple years from gringles and expats living in nikaragua is drips and drabs of bad news Censorship on tv and in the newspapers lots of protests and street demonstrations in the capital of managua And generally just a feeling of low level anxiety throughout the country Now, of course your typical gringo expat no matter where he is in latin america doesn't really watch tv or read the local newspapers So the political situation doesn't really affect him or her much at all Why because us gringles and expats live in our own kind of self-made environment? And even if you're way off the gringo tourist trail and don't run into many gringos You've created your own little version of paradise Which includes living like a first world person by the way with things organized just the way you want them meanwhile presidents politicians

[23:46] And political parties come and go and they don't really affect you which is why for example You could approach a gringo who's been living in latin america in a particular town or country for 10 plus years And he won't even know the name of the president much less the vice president or the mayor of his own town Where gringo is doing our own thing? And we just don't give a rip who's in charge If you've seen one pustule you've seen them all and really the only time we ever get pissed or it upsets us Is when there's some kind of street demonstration or well guy it's called screwing up traffic turning a half-hour trip into a two-hour trip That's about the most we're ever affected by politics Unless they tighten up the residency laws, which they've just done in nicaragua And because nicaragua has got a virtual dictator that never ends well So you really can't feel sorry for gringles and expats live in there

[24:32] They were advised all the signs and symptoms were there 10 years ago But people do what they want to do and they're finding it's not the happy paradise. It used to be Though lately i've had some communications from other gringles and expats living in the boonies In nicaragua and they say things for them are Just fine. Absolutely normal. Not a problem But you see that's how it is in most all of latin america if you live out in the boonies You do your thing and your neighbors could be half a mile away from you They don't bother you at all and the government well, no matter how abusive or corrupted it They stick to flexing their muscle in the towns and cities mostly because they haven't got the money resources or manpower to harass Or police people out in the boonies besides everyone out in the boonies got a three-foot machete strapped to his leg And now an email from mr

[25:18] Bt who signed up for the expat insider seminar and even though it was postponed he came down anyway to get some dental work done Listen to this by the way He's never been to latin america before and you know, that's the thing a lot of people say listen I've never been to latin america and i'm gonna go to guadamala or el salvada or honduras first time down I don't know johnny cnn says those places are hellholes What if I get robbed or god forbid kidnapped by cannibals, you know, some people do have those thoughts Anyway, here's the email. He says hey johnny Just wanted to give you an update on my january guadamala trip I spent a week in guadamala city in a week in antigua guadamala and I can't wait to come back in the end I'm glad I was there for two weeks because in addition to a cracked tooth I needed replacing I cracked a second one while in antigua So dr. Alex has his work cut out for him

[26:06] Did I tell you how pleased I was with dr. Alex in a previous email By the way still waiting for my royalties from you mentioning my last email on your show Then he says I want to let you know also how really pleased I was with your seminar logistic coordinator rita My trip would have been much more stressful had I not had her in my corner first She gave a great tour and her perfect english made it even more enjoyable Secondly when I needed transportation from antigua to dr. Alex's office for that second broken tooth She had a driver in the wings waiting for me and very reasonably priced and punctual, too No manana time for him or rita and because he speaks about as much english as I do spanish Rita was a great go-between She made sure everything was clear when I needed to be picked up and how long the appointment was going to be etc

[26:52] Etc In the end. I really don't know how I could have gotten through this two weeks without rita I might have muddled through but having her involved made everything so much easier plus she knows everyone here Man is she connected everywhere. We went. She seemed to know the workers waiters owners all of them She gave me a list of restaurants too and recommendations that I found very helpful would happily recommend her to anyone Headed to guadamala and he finishes by saying thanks again. Johnny. That's a hell of a team You have put together in guadamala now that i've had some boots on the ground there. I see why you like it so much Sincerely, mr. Bt. Well, thanks for that. Mr. Bt and we'll be seeing you at the seminar You've been listening to the expat files living in latin america If you need some help with your own plan b we can schedule a one-on-one phone or skype consult

[27:41] Just send me an email the expat files at gmail.com And if you want to get on the waiting list for my next week-long expat insider seminar in central america Where you're guaranteed to get a two to five year head start on your plan b. Send me an email the expat files at gmail.com nos vemos