#1108 – The Expat Files: Navigating Expat Life in Latin America

Automatically transcribed from the original recording; names and wording may contain errors.

[00:00] South of the border down Mexico way That's where I fell in love when the stars above came up to play and now as I wonder Hello there all you ex-pat wannabes. I'm Johnny Mueller and you're listening to the expat files living in Latin America The show that tells you just what it's like to live work play and or retire down here in Latin America It's a mix of the good the bad the ugly and the great and it's all right here. So let's get started All right. Finally good news on the seminar front been waiting a long long time to get this next expat insider seminar underway And what took us so long? Well this Covid it crap, of course, you know the story lockdowns restrictions those useless PCR tests

[00:48] Well, the good news is the country of El Salvador, you know Bitcoin Beach and all that one of the stops on our trip Has opened up completely No proof of facts or tests crossing borders. None of that stuff anymore. And that was always the hang up, you know Everyone having to get a PCR antigen test within 72 hours of crossing borders and all that. Thank God It's no more though a negative covid a test does apply upon returning to the states and with the airlines Of course, at least they won't be required when we're at the seminar crossing land borders So the seminar is on we're honing in on the dates will probably be in mid or early February We'll be sending out details to everyone who's on the waiting list and for people who've already paid for the seminar You'll get all the information and the details shortly, too

[01:33] So once again, we're homing in on February 2022 for our week-long expat insider seminar We'll have the dates picked shortly and they'll be announced on the next show Oh, and by the way, if you're all wound up about this new omicron covid it variant I don't know how much you've read or how much research you've done But the doctors who first discovered the strain in South Africa and now the UK are saying it's been very mild so far And they have great confidence that the mutation is unlikely to be serious or more malicious than the previous strains And there's been no real uptick in hospitalizations In fact the quote here from one of the doctors who discovered it South Africa who's now treating cases She says quote the cases that have occurred so far have all been mild to moderate not severe and that's a good sign And at the epicenter in South Africa

[02:19] They're saying that it's very mild with symptoms being sore muscles and a slight cough and up to now most all of those infected are being Treated at home says the report So my advice don't let the Vex crazy media scare you into getting a boaster Because what it really does look like the plan looks like anyway Well, just like any flu variants are gonna pop up and every six months They're gonna try to get you to go in for another jab, you know the story Yep, it looks like it's all about the money because with every new jab That's countless billions into the pockets of big pharma and into the pockets of lying egocentric ass wipes like dr. Falsy and hair gates who have an undisclosed financial stake in those Vax companies But you knew that already, right? By the way, I'm sure you know if you've already had kovid recent studies out of Israel show your immunity to the original strain and the

[03:07] Variance is 13 times greater than if you've been back. No, not 13% greater 13 times greater But you knew that already too didn't you though? The lame stream media does not like to disseminate that kind of information Because of course it runs contrary to their Vax everyone with an imperfect jab make a couple billion then jab Them with a booster and make a couple billion repeat and make another couple billion every six months protocol All right. Here's a little story for you the other day Company the fresh green gringo expat to a Costco here in Latin America. They're called price mark down here price marked And just like in the States it caused 25 to 35 bucks a year for a membership card so anyway, the gringo I was with bought an office chair and When we went through the checkout

[03:53] He was surprised to see there was a special table on the way out with a guy there who would open up the box Pull out the parts and inspect them for damage all the while making my gringo buddy stand there and watch and then the guy doing the inspection would make a little X on the receipt indicating everything was in order all as well and that my gringo buddy had Witnessed it and most hardware stores TV and appliance stores do that with everything that's in a sealed box and anything That's electronic or mechanical like a hairdryer TV microwave oven kitchen set patio furniture They inspect it with you present and you know, I've been down here so long. I just take it for granted But after it was over the gringo guy said to me, I don't get it Seems like a totally unnecessary second step because up in the States when I buy something like a barbecue and I open the box

[04:39] And there's a dent in it. There's a chipped corner. Whatever I just bring it back because most stores have a 30-day return policy as long as you have the receipt, right? Well, I told them not so fast down here in Latin America. It's a bit different Sure, it's true franchise stores that have landed down here in Latin America like Costco, which is price smart Walmart ace hardware, etc They honor that 30-day return policy just like up in the States But you see here in Latin America almost no one's aware of that policy because it's just not customary It never has been us franchise stores with those kinds of policies just arrived recently. It's always been buyer beware That's why when you go to a mom-and-pop shop a corner hardware store, whatever I'm talking years ago way before the US franchises like Walmart landed who fortunately

[05:24] instilled some kind of customer service and a decent return policy Well, this is how it used to be if you bought for example a power drill They'd open the box take it out make you look at it plug it in actually rev it up in front of you You'd give him a nod everything was a okay. They'd rebox it out the door You'd go and that was the end of it. No reklamos. No returns after that It was all yours And if you got it home and had buyers remorse or were dissatisfied with it in any way or it failed or broke down It was your problem not to sellers though. It is true if you buy tools or electronic items like TVs microwaves, etc They'll come with the usual manufacturers warranty But if it breaks down you normally wouldn't be taking it back to the place you bought it

[06:09] You'd have to take it to an authorized manufacturers service center For example, if you bought a Panasonic LG Sony TV or black and Decker tool or whatever brand you wouldn't be taking it back To the store you bought it that would be a wasted trip They're just gonna tell you to take it to the Sony Panasonic or black and Decker service center That's unaffiliated with them because the guarantees with the manufacturer now and the seller has no more responsibility for it Which begs the question what happens if you buy an item an appliance like one of those nifty but expensive Tyson cordless vacuum cleaners have you seen those great vacuum, but good luck finding a Tyson service center in Latin America Well, you know with all the different kind of brands out there these days and all of the thousands of weird appliance and tool Brands coming out of China It really pays to make sure there's a service center around because there's no way it would be worthwhile

[06:57] To send an item back to the states just to get it serviced and you find these days here in Latin America since so many people Are ordering things from Amazon now and other online stores like eBay You really have to consider especially if it's an expensive item if there's a service center for that brand nearby Because you know, even if you did buy an item through Amazon and had it shipped down. Let's say an HP computer Well, if it breaks down within the warranty period usually a year the HP service center in your nearby Latin City Will do the warranty repair? But you just have to have the receipts by the way an HP computer is a good bet because they have service centers in every medium And large Latin City, but if you buy an off-brand appliance or device You just might be stuck with an orphan product that you won't be able to get service or parts for unless you order them online

[07:43] Through Amazon or eBay whatever it might end up in the closet like many Purchases do unless you know how to do the repair yourself that happened to me with a DJI drone I crashed it could have sent it back to the states But it would have cost a couple hundred bucks to do so So I ordered the parts were something like 20 bucks and I was able to fix it myself I got lucky that time So that's why most of the time it does pay to buy a brand you're familiar with When you're dealing with electronics power tools and appliances, even if it's not Precisely the brand you wanted. For example about a year ago. I ordered a garbage disposal bought it online through Amazon Oh, they had them down here All right in the high-end kitchen stores But they were more than twice as expensive than ordering it online and even with the cost of shipping being four or five bucks a pound

[08:29] I saved a ton of money and you know for every appliance here of Dozens and dozens of models and brands to choose from right? Well, I picked one from Sears, which is actually made by in sync rater Why because I knew I could get parts easily down here. There's a Sears in almost every big Latin City So if it crafts out and dies, you know, there's a service center nearby But like I said, if you bring it down to a Sears Yep, there are Sears down here It'll be a wasted trip because they'll just refer you to a service center They've contracted out and not part of Sears And if it's still under warranty even if you bought it up in the states and had it shipped down a bona fide service center We'll honor it. By the way If any repair job at a bona fide service center seems way too expensive for you There are plenty of little corner mom-and-pop repair shops That'll take a crack at sometimes it could do it for less than half the price of an authorized service center

[09:17] Due to extremely low overhead and all that the thing is lots of the parts on Electronics and appliances and such are interchangeable and mom-and-pop repair shops have them on hand But you'll never know that till you get an estimate But back to the business of opening your boxes and inspecting the items before you leave the store You know, I really do believe a lot of it goes back to the fact that Latinos are much more tolerant of defects and Deficiencies in the products they buy I noticed that right away when I first came down some 30 years ago when I bought two places a little beach house in Manuel Antonio and Nice condo in a residential high rise in San Jose Costa Rica the capital and because you know gringos like to do modifications I was headed to the hardware and appliance stores all the time and I noticed right away There were appliances on the shelves that weren't in perfect condition yet

[10:04] They were being sold as brand new not that they were used They were just sort of banged up scuffed and damaged probably in shipping and handling What I'm saying is you'd walk into a hardware appliance store and there'd be lots of stuff on display That should have been in a scratch and dent sale But was on the floor and the shelves being sold as new and back then your choices on brands and models were very limited But these days there's lots more competition many more stores and lots and lots of choices Not as many as in the states, of course, but so much more variety than there used to be anyway back then More often than not you'd find something you like like a TV or a chair or a table set You'd say to the salesman. Okay, I'll take one of those and there'd be no inventory in the back room Of course You didn't know that till he came back from the storage area with an empty box the original dusty box for the display model

[10:54] You were looking at so then you had a choice either bought the display model That was all kind of dusty and well, you know what stuff looks like after it's been on display on a shelf for a year Or who knows how long? Well, that's when you have to make a choice. How bad do you really want that thing? It depends on how many little scuffs and scratches, right? Oh, and if you buy it you pay full price You get no discount for it But Latinos don't seem to mind they buy that stuff and seem to be much more tolerant about it If you think I'm wrong about that, it's because you haven't been down here to Latin America Just look around in a parking lot You see cars new and light new cars very expensive. What's to with any number of dings dents and scratches I don't know about you But every American I know who buys a new car up in the States They make sure it remains like that for a long long time and any little dents and scratches at least in the first year

[11:42] Or two are taken care of immediately. Well, it's just not like that down here In fact, what used to really drive me nuts in the early days was I'd have a nice car Be in the parking lot and I'd come back from shopping Whatever and it'd be three guys leaning on it and you know pants these days those metal rivets and spikes on them could really damage A paint job you and I would never think of doing that. It's just not good form But down here Latinos just don't seem to be as particular about their property or yours Of course when you buy something new out of the box, it's always pristine But that state normally doesn't last long somehow you have to learn to get over it or it'll drive you nuts Just like you have to come to terms with those motorcycle maggots the cockroaches of the road and don't get me started on that Horse pieces they call rag-a-thon music. However, that stuff might bug you. You can't change the culture

[12:29] You got to develop a switch to turn it off or every time you're on the road It's just gonna irritate the hell out of you. Don't let that stuff add up. You gotta let go of it Oh and talk about Latinos disrespecting your car or your other possessions for that matter You'll find that out if you ever host a party at your house and invite the neighbors It's not that Latinos mean to disrespect your stuff It's just a culture where they're used to letting a lot of things slide now you might say in a way That's good less stress in life and all that, you know, don't get too anal about material things But then again part of that equation is their disregard for basic maintenance It can get serious when you disregard oil and filter changes. Oh, but my favorite Latino disregard for property story again None of this is intentional. It's just not on their radar was a few years back It was a day I was shopping for something and I went back to my car in the parking lot only to encounter a lady

[13:17] changing her kids diapers on the hood of my car and When I walked up and hit the key fob, you know to unlock the door you get that sound She looked at me and smiled said Los siento. This will only take a minute. No panic. No embarrassment No shame at all. Just a lady tending to her kid while nature call with my car the nearest proxy porta potty now Admittedly, this didn't happen in a high-end first world style district in a big city I was in a rather scruffy looking business district in the body Oh, but hey, I learned my lesson which was if you want to avoid a certain amount of constant aggravation Never buy a brand new car in Latin America Oh, and there's a hundred other examples to prove that Latin Americans have lower standards Or you might say are just less anal than first world people or put another way They don't seem to mind defects and discrepancies and the things that they own that includes the things that you own too

[14:05] For example, they don't seem to mind very noticeable stains on their tables couches and chairs and furniture practically every Latino house I've been into there's food and soda and animal stains on one or more pieces of furniture I mean look for 10 bucks. You could buy a can of that spray foam upholstery cleaner I've used it myself in my car now and again because you can't always control You know what people are eating in your car. So that's a simple solution. It does exist You could buy that stuff at every hardware store I always have a can of it around the house, but I've never seen a Latino use it In fact, Chepe who is my maintenance guy for at least 10 years He'd clean my car a couple times a week and one time I bought a candidate stuff showed him how to use it He was amazed another example of the Latino screw the details attitude is when you walk into a new house and you see paint spatters

[14:51] Everywhere when they paint the walls, they don't protect anything So the spatter gets on floors doors light fixtures and switches you name it That goes for when you hire a professional painter or professional painting company, too That goes for plumbers and bathroom and kitchen fixture installers they'll leap globs of silicone caulk and plumbers putty that you the owner or renter will notice and will have to clean up if You're so inclined man. If I was a realtor or builder showing off a new house to a client like that I'd be embarrassed. You'd think they'd know better just from a marketing standpoint, but they don't funny thing though When it comes to a Latino or latinas personal appearance when they're out and about or on a date or going to church Most often they're impeccably dressed and their hair perfect you know the style these days is for guys to get custom cuts and ladies to get those extensions and

[15:38] Sometimes an expat Eddie taught me this one The only way to tell a wealthy Latino from a poor one is not by his or her clothes or the cool hairstyle But by looking at the condition of a person's fingernails or shoes though come to think of it mine are pretty ratty sometimes, too Oh, well, that reminds me of another thing expat Eddie told me a long time ago Before a painter plumber electrician even begins a job Eddie says to him listen You're a professional. I want a real professional job now And if you do a good job, you'll never have to see me again Hmm. It takes him a while for that to sink in but most of them get it Oh and speaking of house parties meeting the neighbors and maybe the family of your significant other I have to tell you over the last few years things on that score have really changed and it's nothing to do with kovat

[16:23] It used to be five or ten years ago when I get invited to a weekend at the Finca or a barbecue I'd be bored to tears unless there was a gringo or two around but me I'm off the gringle tourist trail So that almost never happens even so sometimes you could be sitting with the whole army of gringos and be bored to tears You know what I mean? And if they're woke you want to pass out the cyanide pills So for me, I have to admit for years at least in the early days when I'd get invited to a strictly Latino function Or a family get-together. I knew I'd be mostly bored just sitting around listening to Uncle Tulio's bad jokes Hearing about the relatives that made good in New York and my jammy Looking at photos of someone's kids standing in front of the Magic Kingdom at Disney World I know I must sound like a jerk here, but that's dead boring stuff to me But you know and you've heard me say this many times before if you have a Latina or Latino

[17:12] Significant other their family comes along with the deal So if there's a party you get together at quince annuals festival a dinner and you don't go you'll be in the doghouse She'll catch a lot of heat. So you go even if you can speak Spanish She'll be mostly twiddling your thumbs smiling and making nice wishing you were someplace else. But really what have you got in common? What can you talk about? After all, you're an expat with a plan B. You got the hell out of dodge You've got a completely different set of knowledge and interests I know it sounds pretentious and awful to say you don't really have a lot in common with the local neighbors or your Significant others Latino family. What are you gonna talk about? Solar power electric cars creeping socialism big brother big farmer The US police state Bitcoin crypto GMOs climate change the last podcast you listen to her bestseller you read

[18:03] Well, not likely There's only a very small chance that your Latin neighbors or girlfriend or boyfriend's family are interested in any of that Even so your Spanish would have to be pretty damn good to converse on any of those topics to make yourself understood by non-English speakers What I'm saying is you won't have much common ground when speaking to the local neighbors or the family members of your significant other Because a lot of those problems just don't exist in Latin America. For example, the existence of big brother in a police state It's not evident down here. So it's not in their faces and not by any means a general topic of discussion So bottom line, I've been to lots of parties and get-togethers where I've been bored out of my gourd But I'd always bring along my earbuds and tiny iPod I'd stick an earbud in just one ear and listen to an audiobook or some podcasts been pulling that little trick for years

[18:51] And of course, I'd get some flack from my girlfriend on that too You know, like I wasn't all there all in on the party got that right But hallelujah all that changed about three or four years ago When the cost of a smartphone dropped under a hundred bucks and now when I'm the only gringo at neighborhood parties and get-togethers I can listen to my iPod to my heart's content since everyone's addicted to social media on their phone I can listen to my audio books and various podcasts and I don't get the evil eye or get scolded like before These days I've got no fear of reprisals from the significant other Nor do I feel like somewhat of a party pooper So that's one maybe the only positive secondary effect of anti-social media that everyone's so addicted and distracted by it That means I can take advantage of it and amuse myself in the most boring of situations

[19:38] So technically speaking I could be just as rude as the next guy And since we're all equally immersed in our rudeness The culture has been shifted to rude is the new norm and if everyone's doing it and they are then by definition The word rude must refer to some different kind of crassness all together. Does that make sense? Well, if it doesn't you're probably a boomer like me whose parents actually let you go outside by yourself and play all day with your buddies Until you were so tired you couldn't stay up past nine o'clock if you try try that today your neighbors would call child welfare services They'd take your kids away and put them in foster homes, which is reason 3426 why you really have to get the hell out of dodge because that kind of stuff will never happen in Latin America By the way, how's that plan B coming or are you still working on plan a and a half? Alright, let's take an email

[20:25] From Ed wire though. It's a good one. He says dear Johnny My family and I escaped Venezuela in 2009 my father being a mining engineer unable to go back and forth to mining projects in Colombia one notable week We went on vacation to Colombia and never went back had relatives in Cincinnati Ohio went there in 2010 have been there ever since I'm a longtime listener Johnny But I'm writing because of the recent comments you made saying that Venezuelans are completely dumbfounded by young college-age Americans for embracing socialism your comments were dead on Johnny. I Can see how it's having a slow but drastic and terrible effect on American democracy The same slow and terrible backward progress my family witnessed in Venezuela under Hugo Chavez

[21:12] You mentioned six million of us Venezuelans have left the country so far 20% of the adult population It's true in all the Venezuelans. I know in the United States are seeing it happen here But for some reason Americans here in Cincinnati don't see it at all and I know why because they never had to live under such a system It's easy to be critical of things and your own system when you live in a complacent society and you've got everything at your fingertips You've got cars TVs nice apartments air conditioning power water lights and internet that never fail or rarely fail There's actually a term for that complacency that turns into criticism in psychology can't think of the term now But I'll probably remember it tomorrow It happens with animals too when they get complacent and bored and have all the food and water and comforts they want

[21:59] Eventually, they get irritable and start fighting some even killing each other in humans It's more complicated than that, but you get the point I wanted to make a point to Johnny about other Latino countrymen would just love to live in America Just look at all those illegal caravans coming through Mexico to me and all my Venezuelan friends We find it funny how Mexican and Central American immigrants who end up in America all seem to favor socialism and its stricter sister Communism too, however with Cuban and Venezuelan immigrants like me when we come to America We feel just the opposite We reject even soft attempts at socialism because we lived it people like me who've escaped Venezuela and Cuba and people still stuck there Watching the world from Venezuela and Cuba are simply bewildered at what's happening to America though

[22:47] Those of us who've escaped don't openly criticize it because we've held the US in such high esteem for so many decades as the best Example of freedom capitalism and the entrepreneurial spirit. We needed a role model and it was America You'll never know how much the idea of America meant to us. We needed you as our role model But now when my countrymen see the unbelievably idiotic actions of politically naive Americans Protesting in the streets and changing books and curriculum to suit their ideas of equality of outcome and other unnatural human conditions Many of my Latino friends prefer to believe that it's a fringe element that's on the news They don't want to believe it's real throughout the country. It can't be We in Cuba and Venezuela learned a long time ago that governments lie to us

[23:34] They feed us what they want us to hear and give the propaganda to the news outlets continuously So as a result, we never believed much of what was on the news or anything that came from a government source We even had our doubts about the weather lady in Venezuela We knew about fake news before Americans ever invented the term and yet Americans sit back and believe what CNN the FDA WHO CDC and the government spokesmen say it's just so sad to see history repeating itself in the worst way The strange irony is Johnny after finding your show I realize you've got a small version of a brain drain to smart Americans making their plans to get out of dodge As you say what a bizarre world my family's plan or plan B was to escape Venezuela and head for America What a twist that certain smart Americans are getting out and going against that flow and relocating to of all places

[24:25] Latin America my poor dead parents who once admired Hugo Chavez until he emptied the Treasury would never have believed it possible Americans willfully moving to Latin America not in a million years. They would have said I don't want to sound big-headed or like I'm bragging but Venezuelans have always been considered the most educated of all Latin Americans Ask anyone from any other Latin American country and they'll tell you so perhaps begrudgingly, but they will admit it Anyone can look up the statistics and see for themselves But we who have escaped to the US have given up trying to educate our own less enlightened Latino brethren who still keep streaming northward to seek the quote American dream It seems no one wants to hear us anymore our stories of what it was really like living under Castro Chavez and Maduro

[25:15] Where everyone was quote equal and the state was both your mother and father and took care of all your needs My Latino brethren from other countries don't want to hear about it. It falls on deaf ears As far as I'm concerned when people say others don't learn the lessons of history. We do know history rhymes and repeats itself I think that's actually being too kind. It's not harsh enough. I'm very afraid for America No matter what Americans have heard the borders are wide open. You'll let just anyone in I know it won't make a difference, but take it from a person who lived through socialism or whatever convenient name politicians and socialists like to call it It's a fact people refuse to learn from history or don't care about it But I'm afraid it's too late far worse things are coming to America If you think it's toxic now

[26:00] Just wait take it from me and all the Venezuelans who got out of Dodge only to land in another Dodge It's a shame history has to repeat itself. I know this is a long email Johnny. Thanks for listening. All right Thanks for that Eduardo. I know a lot of you listeners out there will find his email quite interesting By the way, speaking of getting out of Dodge Venezuela style, they're everywhere. I run into them all the time I'll never forget about two and a half years ago. Now. I ran into a beautiful Venezuelan lady who just got out She'd been out of the country just two weeks. I asked her to tell me her story She said she'd owned three clothing stores in a big shopping center in Caracas Venezuela and one day she said a couple months earlier a Group of military guys in uniform walked into the mall and posted little signs on every business's front window saying by government

[26:51] Edict the mall had been nationalized the government now owned their property and they were informed They were still allowed to keep their businesses and make money and all that but they no longer own their property It was property of the state Well that Venezuelan lady said that most of the owners in that mall owned their places outright Some had been there 10 even 20 years and for her It was a huge crushing blow. That was her investment all of her capital went into owning her three little commercial spaces So she had a fire sale liquidated all her merchandise Paid the requisite bribes to government officials to get her paperwork in order and left for a short vacation to Panama That two-week vacation turned into around two and a half years now You've been listening to the expat files living in Latin America If you need some help with your own plan B

[27:38] We can schedule a one-on-one phone or Skype consult just send me an email the expat files at gmail.com and if you want to get on the waiting list for my next week long expat Insider seminar in Central America where you're guaranteed to get a two to five year head start on your plan B Send me an email the expat files at gmail.com