#1265 – Episode 1265: Expat Life, Parenting Challenges, and Economic Realities in Latin America

Automatically transcribed from the original recording; names and wording may contain errors.

[00:00] South of the border down Mexico way That's where I fell in love when the stars above came out to play and now as I wonder Hello there all you ex-pad wannabes. I'm Johnny Mueller and you're listening to the expat files living in Latin America The show that tells you just what it's like to live work play and or retire down here in Latin America It's a mix of the good the bad the ugly and the great and it's all right here. So let's get started Are you sure you're in the right place? You're listening to the expat files living in Latin America show You are in the right place though If you want a safe space where words cannot cause physical harm men cannot get pregnant trees are not racist Capitalism is not evil. It's a place where we count only two genders not 54 where George Washington

[00:52] John Adams and Tom Jefferson are not hateful bigots a place where no amount of drugs or surgery Can you give a person born with two X chromosomes a functional dick? In other words if you're offended by reality Who changed the channel or go to a Disney movie and now from the getting out of Dodge with no baggage department Comes an email from Betty Hmm. I have an aunt Betty and an aunt gladdie and an aunt Phyllis Good solid old-fashioned names that kind of skipped a bunch of generations They may be popping up now, but I remember in the 60s 70s 80s 90s Nobody named their kids Betty Phyllis or Gladys. I'm talking about stateside Of course down here in Latin America anything goes but things, you know

[01:37] Do come full circle and get resurrected like fat belts and ties and bell-bottom pants Anyway, Betty says Johnny in the response to that show you did a while back about an annoying night You and your friends had in a restaurant when some kid was screaming at 10 at night And you said something to the parents and it did not go down. Well, I just listened to that episode I'm a bit like you too The point is I don't ever say this stuff in mixed company But I never had kids never wanted kids and I'm glad I never had kids I do not miss having not had kids. I love my independence and my husband and I have no debt Everyone I know who has kids has problems and kid-related debt that never ends The kids of all my friends have problems

[02:24] They either have kids with emotional dysfunctions some just a little in some severe emotional dysfunctions And it can never be let on their own Seems like every parent I know has a kid that's been to a shrink most of them multiple times When I was in kindergarten through high school I think I only remember one kid admitting she'd been to a shrink because she continuously ran away from home Where she had some of my friends have adult kids that are in and out of bad marriages Leaving the grandparents to take care of and raise their spoiled grandchildren I've got friends whose kids are into drugs. They're bipolar into alcohol Some are parasitic leeches who keep hitting up their parents and grandparents for money most have big school debt their parents or grandparents are on the hook for and

[03:09] many have dead-end jobs or useless careers that won't support a family I Can count on one hand friends and relatives who have healthy well-adjusted grown children with no issues Though I suspect they do have issues, but are putting up a good front not telling anyone about it That said because of the no-kid policy in my family It's been easy for me and my husband to get a plan B and get the hell out of dodge Many friends of ours seem jealous of us when we pop off on a spur-of-the-moment vacations And our smarter adult friends who know we're working on a plan B They'd like to get the hell out of dodge to move to another country But are held back by their useless kids and grandkids Then she says you're right Johnny when nothing else works. It's the parents who need to be slapped, but that won't happen

[03:59] Alright Betty. Thanks for that You must be one of those persons who listens to the show but you're not caught up to the current ones Because if I recall that show was maybe six months ago even more. It's coming back to me I remember you know when I was talking about being at a restaurant with a couple of gringo friends and at the table next Door a kid was screaming his head off And I finally said something about it and the kids gringo wannabe parents tried to give me shit for bringing it up If you remember the theme of that boots on the ground story was to point out that as a rule almost Every single Latin American kid is more well-behaved than an American kid Unless the parents are gringo wannabes who have dough They're kind of dough to have a really nice car be able to put on the dog go to fine Restaurants and drag along the entitled kids and their iPads by the way

[04:48] Did you ever notice that kids these days even three four five and six year olds have iPads seems like kids With iPads are everywhere. I'm even starting to see a lot of that down here in Latin America Of course not with the middle and lower middle classes But the middle and upper classes you bet and then it never fails the kid gets excited by something He sees on the iPad and shoves it in his mom or dad's face and suddenly Everybody's attentions on the kid isn't that cute the little genius is at it again all the adult conversation stops And all the attention is placed on the kid man when I was young a five-year-old kid could never butt into an adult Conversation and take it over that would be rude and signify bad manners or more to the point bad parenting and back then parents never Took their kids to restaurants unless the kids were very well behaved even at so-called family restaurants back

[05:39] Then kids weren't running around hooping it up and throwing things all over the place even in a family restaurant Parents would not put up with that. I guess while we're on this topic. I should read this email from Manuel He says he's a second-generation Mexican American living in LA He says Johnny whenever I go to a restaurant with my wife I usually jokingly request a seat in the non-screaming baby section. I usually get a laugh and surprisingly it works But sometimes even that's not enough because there are parents in restaurants who allow their children to watch videos on their cell phones Or pads at top volume just to keep the kid amused without any thought that they're driving other people nuts He says I've even seen restaurants post signs quote. This is not a playground parents

[06:27] Please control your children and signs saying quote adults must accompany a child for service Which can only mean the restaurant got tired of parents letting their kids run wild inside that restaurant My idea is segregation. It's not so crazy. They used to have smoking and non-smoking sections Why not baby and non-baby sections? Same goes for movie theaters Nobody wants to hear screaming kids when everyone's trying to watch a movie if you choose to have a kid There are certain things you have to give up doing for a while as to not annoy others You should realize no one thinks your kids as cute as you think he is Unfortunately, he says today's parents as well as the parents of the last 30 years or so have failed miserably Except for a very few and man when you're in a restaurant

[07:14] You could tell who those good parents are in a second a well-behaved kid is a credit to his parents The reason why I'm writing this Johnny is because last night my wife and I went to dinner after a long day of working Hard only to find four screamers in the restaurant and the parents just totally ignoring him Seems that parents today are afraid to discipline their kids because they're afraid that some other wishy washy third-rate parent might accuse them of child abuse However, I come from a different culture being that I'm a Latino guy born of parents who lived in Mexico They always told me as part of being a parent to keep a lid on your kid in front of strangers or company They'd say taking your kids out to dinner is a great treat not a torture test for everyone else in the place My parents were in our old-fashioned Latinos. So when I was a kid the relatives traveled to see the kids

[08:05] So there were lots of weekends and Sunday barbecues at people's homes And no kids went out to dinner or traveled on vacation until they were 10 years old at least because my parents were born in Mexico I've traveled there many times every time I'd go there with my parents. They'd talk about the progress They're seeing just look at all the nice restaurants popping up. My mother would say she'd say the average person's lifestyle is getting better all the time yet when you pop in or stick your head in one of those restaurants, you rarely see kids under 10 and When you do guess what they're with a Nene era Yep, a nanny. He says it's almost always a rule that people in Mexico with above-average incomes They have live-in nannies for their kids So when the kids are out at Costco Walmart or at a restaurant

[08:52] It's that nanny or neneira who keeps a lid on those kids keeps them in line when they're out in public That's something I've never seen here in LA No one I know in Los Angeles can afford a live-in nanny By the way, Johnny loved the show though. I don't agree with everything you say about Latin America You're spot-on with most things including the fact that it's getting harder and harder to achieve that so-called American dream In fact when I visit my relatives in Mexico that American dream topic always seems to come up I keep telling them you'll have a hard time finding the American dream if you move up live in a badio and Don't learn English. If you live in a place like East LA you'll never get out, but they're not hearing that They don't want to listen to me signed Manuel Alright, Manuel. Thanks for that. You know, you never said if you're gonna have a plan B move back to Mexico someday

[09:45] But I assume you're thinking about it. Why else would you be listening to this show? It's a funny thing to all the Latinos living up in the States who listen to this show who'd a thunk, huh? What do they need this show for? Why would they listen to me? Obviously because they want to get back to Latin America because they see the American dream ain't what it's cracked up to be I'm sure they're thinking even though most are American citizens retirement up in the States ain't gonna be easy People are quickly getting priced out of the good life. They're smart enough to know it's fraying at the edges Social security sure ain't gonna cut it Sure, sure the sueño Americano the American dream is alive and well But only if you have the right parents you're politically connected otherwise known as nepotism or have some sort of career that's in great demand like a stem career or

[10:35] If you're very brilliant or creative or just get damn lucky The fact is the American dream the way it used to work for the common man. Anyway, it's just a fantasy now But you knew that already, right? All right, let's take an email from a Latina University student living up in the United States the subject box says I've been Latinx Communicated I get it. I Can kind of guess what that's all about. It's from Lenora also living right now in LA Dear Johnny. I'm one of those Latina rich girls you talk about sometimes though. It's hardly ever complementary I might add Yes, I'm the stereotype Latina rich girl helicopter school bilingual the whole works You're probably thinking I should be mad at you, but I'm not before yes, but now not so much

[11:25] I noticed immediately when I got accepted into UCLA in California. Yes, my parents have that kind of money I noticed my English is infinitely better than the English many of my native-born classmates speak I thought how could that be that my English is better than theirs. That was my first clue that something was wrong with American University life She said yeah, I'm one of those spoiled rich girls. My dad owns a company in Honduras You can guess if you want but I won't tell you which one and his dad owned it and my grandpa owned it etc Etc. If you're thinking I'm from one of those ten Honduran families with generational wealth you'd be right She said last year as a senior in high school. A bunch of my friends would listen to your show Admit sometimes I'd get mad or angry even listening to sometimes even get a knot in my stomach

[12:12] I'd tell my boyfriend turn it off. He would for a while, but it always come back Anyhow now in my freshman year at UCLA Student visa in hand. I don't get angry anymore when I listen to you Why because as soon as I started my freshman year I was approached by that Latinx girls activist squad. Did you know every American University has one? It didn't take me long to realize I was not one of them. I must not have gotten the Latinx memo I won't refer to anyone by that term. I cringe when I hear people say it You were right John. It's mostly white girls and white teachers who use that term to me. It's not only ridiculous. It's embarrassing I just wish they would please cut it out

[12:59] But you can't always get what you want, even if you're a spoiled rich girl, uh-huh Signed Lenora PS Johnny. I think you'll laugh at this I saw a Harley guy with a t-shirt on that said stand clear. I choke the woke Not bad. All right Lenora. Thanks for that Problem is down here in Latin America. If you follow that advice if you choke the woke you'd be killing off gringos almost exclusively We don't want to kill them. We just want to send them back to the woke states from which they came By the way Lenora you talk about being a Latin American rich kid. Well, we won't hold that against you. You sound all right to me Just wondering though if you ever heard that famous American business saying it goes like this from shirt sleeves to shirt sleeves in three generations

[13:50] Though down here in Latin America with lag time and all it's not three generations It's more like four or five Hmm. All right How about this email from Cal who says I just got back from a trip through Mexico Belize and Costa Rica rented a car in the Yucatan and drove south down the Mayan River era One thing I noticed Johnny tattooed pilers everywhere. I poked my head into a few of them too and man disgusting He says Johnny. It's more proof people just keep getting stupider and stupider Especially after this kovat thing and what people know about vax is in that spike protein. You'd think they'd know better, but they don't He says with all the millions and millions of tattoos done since the lockdowns Can you imagine how many Americans have subclinical HIV or spike protein? How about hepatitis and who knows what else hell Johnny?

[14:41] Have you ever seen the inside of a tattoo parlor? They're gross enough in the States But in Latin America is supposed to trust that all those shops adhere to sterile clean guidelines And that's just in the US imagine south of the border where it's the honor system and anything goes he says I'm a biochemist by trade and My like-minded buddies and I are predicting an explosion of clinical and subclinical diseases Not just from those facts jabs But from all the cross contamination between the millions and millions of tattoos that have been applied while those spike proteins have been floating around He says I've been off the tourist trail in Mexico, Guatemala Panama, Costa Rica I'm a hiker and a mountain biker and I've scaled a few volcanoes and along the way

[15:29] He says I've run into quite a few American hippie backpackers with fresh tattoos and sometimes When you get a chance to ask them about those new tats They're pleased as punch to tell you they got their ink for a third or a fourth or what they'd pay in the states For the same thing and I'm thinking as a biochemist now at what future cost Now Johnny don't think I'm anal about this, but I've also checked out quite a few barbershops in Latin America They throw all the combs brushes razors every bit of paraphernalia in a big glass jar full of disinfectant That I'm sure they only change once a day or even once a week He says I've been through some body owes in neighborhoods Where the barbers do fresh shaves like they did in the old movies with a single razor I've never been shaved in a barbershop myself

[16:15] How about you though every guy has had the areas around his ears and the back of his neck shaved by a barber with a straight razor It's very easy to get nicked or cut and draw a little blood that said what does the average customer know about proper disinfection techniques? Try practically nothing and do they even care? What about the huge number of bald guys and skinheads who regularly go to the barbershop to get their head shaved though? Some guys do it themselves eventually every guy nicks himself and draws a little blood Just a little food for thought Johnny signed Cal Alright, thanks for that Cal and to answer your question No, I don't have any tattoos and I've never had a shave at a barbershop either Though I can recall many times I've had that straight razor taken to the back of my neck and around the ears at the barbershop

[17:04] Who hasn't though? You're right Cal I have noticed that in low-end barbershops and beauty parlors They throw all their utensils in a little glass jar the way they've been doing it traditionally for probably a hundred years Who knows what kind of liquids in there and who knows how often they change it? All I know is it's generally tinted blue. I'll ask next time. I promise However anywhere in the world including here in latin america You gets what you pays for You could go to a hole-in-the-wall neighborhood barbershop where the floor hasn't been swept for a week and paid two bucks for a haircut Or you could go to a nice joint that looks First-world all the way and paid 10 or 15 bucks for a haircut big difference too in the equipment and the layout You're right though. There are no inspections down here. So it's the honor system

[17:53] I suggest you follow the universal rule You gets what you pays for Though as for me, I draw the line at tattoo parlors First world or third world just not interested at all No, thanks. I don't want unknown quantities of toxic materials injected into my body for that matter non-toxic materials don't sound so good either But hey, that's just me Which brings us to this twisted little article from simon black He says I landed in panama last night for a quick business trip And I have to say i'm really astonished at the political situation here Central american countries like panama are often referred to as banana republics The term refers to largely impoverished nations with underdeveloped economies which are controlled by a corrupt ruling class

[18:39] No, they don't necessarily have to export bananas. Anyway, I suppose panama fits that description. He says for example An independent watchdog agency found the top 100 members of panama's legislature Increased their network by an average 114 percent per year that over a decade long period I guess those panamanian politicians are just really good investors and real estate speculators, right? But not to be outdone by the legislators the spouse of one of panama's most prominent and longest serving politicians Has become one of the wealthiest people in the country Who has claimed to have no inside information about critical changes to the country's laws? Somehow no one seems to mind the public doesn't care

[19:25] They seem to believe it on top of that panama's current president is a truly bizarre human being He says the most cringe worthy things Often makes no sense when he speaks and he refuses to acknowledge the existence of his own five-year-old granddaughter He has committed multiple crimes while in office and is widely suspected of receiving bribes from some very unsavory people Several members of the panamanian first family have become expert business consultants raking in millions in cash In exchange for doing absolutely nothing of substance Panama's president has also been caught using government resources to attack political opponents including censoring Dissidents and even trying to imprison a key adversary

[20:12] The local media here in panama is a total joke, too. It's basically a state-sponsored propaganda ministry That is in complete lockstep with the ruling party But hey, like I said panama is a banana republic. So you'd expect this sort of thing to take place here Except as I think many of you have figured out I'm not actually talking about panama I'm talking about the united states So did you see that coming or not? All right moving on a couple of shows back I was talking about airbnbs because I get the air bnb question all the time Is it a good investment for gringos and expanse or not? Well, we spoke at length about that a couple shows ago However, there's been some entirely different and strange air bnb activity going on in the country of argentina lately

[21:04] Some of it pretty crazy, too So i'd like to read you some excerpts from an article that just came out I'm sure you'll find this very interesting. You know argentina's got a hundred percent inflation year over year It's been going on quite a while now That means if you're a landlord to keep up with inflation, you have to increase your rent at least five percent a month But you see what most people don't know and of course gringos and expats don't know this unless they go down to argentina And buy a property and try to rent it There's a law in place in argentina that you can only raise the rent on a tenant once a year So that means if you rent to someone and they pay the rent You know the same amount every month for a year at the end of the year The total amount the landlord has received has lost half of its purchasing power. Just a terrible deal for landlords

[21:56] But wouldn't you know what latino landlords have figured a workaround listen to this Title of the article airbnb hosts in buenos Aires break the law to rent in us dollars and protect themselves against raging inflation And i'll paraphrase this and cut out the boring parts it starts out saying as argentina's inflation rate soared past 100% this year and the value of the currency slid It worker louis he's 33 years old found an economic lifeline Renting out his apartment as an airbnb not in pesos, but in dollars Louis's apartment in buenos Aires brings around 800 bucks a month 60 more than his salary in the it sector Which is paid in argentine pesos and worth just 490 at the black market rate

[22:47] In july of last year. He quit his job to try freelancing Turns out the income louis earns from his airbnb rental is paid in dollars in a digital account on u.s payment platform payoneer He then buys dollar denominated stable coins on an overseas crypto market Which he barters for pesos on a peer-to-peer exchange in argentina All done under the radar of argentine tax and finance authorities It says thousands of argentine property owners are turning to airbnb and other short-term rental platforms To boost their earnings against runaway inflation With worldwide cryptocurrency platforms being their lifeline then it says interviews with 18 airbnb hosts real estate agents and officials including analysis of previously unreported rental data and reviews of landlord chat groups

[23:38] Show that while some property owners do declare their income the majority keep their transactions off the books And that most landlords avoiding taxes were struggling professionals not big-scale real estate outfits Individual landlords had to scramble to find some solution when four in ten argentines are under the poverty line In fact, it says so many argentines have turned to short-term rentals like airbnb's That they've pushed up the local house prices and made it harder to find homes available to the general working public who get paid in pesos Landlords want dollars not pesos For example according to the registry maintained by the argentine real estate chamber 8 000 homes were available for rent in pesos in 2020 and now only

[24:25] 1200 homes are for rent in pesos It says argentine airbnb hosts want dollars not pesos And they don't want those dollars deposited in a local argentine bank account Because they're converted from dollars to pesos at the official exchange rate And lose more than half of it instantly in the conversion So instead they opt for payment through an overseas bank account or global platform and convert at the black market rate Which is an 88 percent better return It also allows them to easily circumvent tax authorities, which of course is illegal So it turns out the only way to make us dollar airbnb payments legal is to transfer through a local bank Because argentine law requires banks like us banks to report the deposits to their local tax authorities

[25:13] Most landlords so hate their government. They just don't comply by the way more than 18 500 airbnb's Were listed in bueno zeras in june 2023 with argentine real estate agents saying everybody wants to rent their place by airbnb No one wants to long-term rent anything anymore Because long-term rentals are in pesos and short-term rentals you could post on the us dollar airbnb platforms Property owners know if they can get paid in dollars They can earn double the rent over a long-term contract in pesos. That's how sick the argentine economy is It says renters who are willing to pay in dollars include remote international workers students and medical tourists from nearby countries and

[25:58] Get this russians and ukrainians fleeing the war many who are fleeing potential military service Meanwhile many argentines who rent say they are worried about finding a place to live when their leases end They're year to year. Normally every renter worries about that hard increase that comes with that yearly renewal For the majority of argentines. It's impossible to buy a house or apartment Not when you get paid in pesos and prices double every year So then you might ask what's the best way to get paid on airbnb and dollars and to exchange those dollars into pesos without Being detected that is without paying taxes Here's how it's done according to a 29 year old airbnb host He earns about a thousand bucks per month from his airbnb And shields all that from argentine taxes

[26:47] He said it's easy You just make a deal with a local real estate broker and he'll convert the pesos or the dollars at the black market rate For a small percentage. He says all the real estate brokers have friends in the black market for them The official government rate is just a fiction Meanwhile, there's a bill proposal going through the argentine congress right now To find airbnb hosts if they don't register with argentine authorities Hmm. All right. Johnny here again. You know what this says to me Shapes of things to come for the us Man, i'm glad I got the hell out when I did and i'm glad I don't live in argentina Then again in all the years i've been doing this show. I think it's 13 years now. I've never recommended argentina as a plan b But you knew that already, right

[27:34] You've been listening to the expat files living in latin america If you need some help with your own plan b we can schedule a one-on-one phone or skype consult Just send me an email the expat files at gmail.com And if you want to get on the waiting list for my next week long expat insider seminar in central america Where you're guaranteed to get a two to five year head start on your plan b send me an email the expat files at gmail.com No spammos