#1438 – The Expat Files: Cheapskate Expats, Maintenance Challenges, and Crime in Latin America

Automatically transcribed from the original recording; names and wording may contain errors.

[00:00] South of the border down Mexico way That's where I fell in love when the stars above came up to play and now as I wonder Hello there all you ex-pad wannabes. I'm Johnny Mueller and you're listening to the expat files living in Latin America The show that tells you just what it's like to live work play and or retire down here in Latin America It's a mix of the good the bad the ugly and the great and it's all right here. So let's get started You might remember a couple of shows ago. I was talking about how down here you run into lots of cheapskates gringo and expat cheapskates I Suppose they come down here in the first place because they've heard you can live down here on the cheap When certain people hear there are places you can live for a half or a third of what's considered normal expenses up in the states

[00:50] It becomes their mission even obsession to come down here and live in Latin America At least check it out to see if it's true dip a toe in the water That's why it was no surprise to me after I mentioned it a couple of times now on the show Mentioned gringo expat cheapskates. That is I got sort of a surprise flurry of emails Coming from expats who noticed that very same thing In fact, one of them sent me this nice long email that looks like it was so well done Probably had chat GPT or open AI polish it up for him. By the way, have you started doing that yet? You know write a letter email text or whatever and had Chad GPT polish it up There goes cursive writing pretty soon Gen Y and Z won't be able to write anything at all. Anyway, that's the future like it or not This is from gringo George who's lived in Panama Costa Rica and Ecuador

[01:38] He says one of the more curious subspecies of expats is the small but noisy contingent That is utterly obsessed with the price of things the price of everything more specifically They're obsessed with the notion that they're being overcharged Everywhere they go not just in the States But in Latin America as well and some of those people are even convinced that other expats and gringos are complicit in those Rip-offs in other words, they're in on it They see a green gringo coming and they're out to fleece him Expat George says it almost doesn't matter what the commodity or service is these Cheapskate folks work themselves into a lather as soon as they get the bill It might be they think they've been overpriced on the dinner on an ice cream cone a haircut a restaurant tip made service

[02:25] apartment rental or more recently even highballed by beggars in the Central Park turns out George says in Calculating the value of things many of these cheapskate expats Presumed to have inside knowledge of the finer points of Latin American economy and culture They come off as expert shoppers and coupon clippers Claiming to know what a fair price for this and that and the other thing should really be then he says But it's not just that you run into these people face to face person to person at restaurants and coffee houses and such Worse yet, they do their biggest rants on social media where they're easily ignored But you can't get away from them any time. There's an open comment section

[03:11] You'll find a cheapskate expat gringo doing a long drawn-out rant. Oh and they can rant George says at least on social media you can ignore them but more frequently They like to hold forth in public social gatherings and restaurants bars and such where you just can't avoid them You want to cut them off or leave but hey it makes a company that's kind of rude. All right All right me John here. I found myself in a situation on occasion without whining complaining gringo on the group more often than not He'll not be part of the group, but we'll just be in the area and saunter up kind of listen to the conversation a while and then Find an opening and start to rant now when these guys show up and kind of rain on the party I just might be the guy that says hey you like it better here or in Milwaukee or Cleveland

[03:57] You know, there are planes going back to the States every hour or so That generally cuts the rant very short often though in social gatherings things are going just fine And you don't know there's a cheapskate gringo ready to rant. All they need is a trigger Like for example, someone might say hey, I see you got a new cell phone. What'd you pay for that? Then you've opened the floodgates to the know-it-all ranting gringo. You paid what gringo prices, man You got ripped. I know where you could have got it $25 cheaper with not one but a two-year guarantee Hmm. The question is when you're living in a country other than your own birthplace. What is really a fair price? For anything no matter how cheap a thing is or how many discounts you've obtained. There's always someone who got it cheaper However, it is true, especially when you're living in countries on the tourist trail like Costa Rica

[04:48] You'll hear the locals point out. It's people like you you gringos who've moved in who are to blame for the high prices They never were like that before you guys came along Man, I've heard that a hundred times Yeah, when the gringos pile in the locals just love us at first, but eventually it breathes resentment Anyway, the email goes out to say these cheapskate gringo expats back in their home country Which was almost always the US most of these folks kept their mouths shut their feelings contained They were dyed in the wool cheapskates while living up in the States to knowing that if they express their opinions They would be seen as ignorant boars and loud mouth. No one likes a complainer Though all of us me included have known a few extremely cheap American guys who would stiff a waiter for a tip, etc, etc

[05:38] But once these cheapskates get down here to Latin America, you can't shut them up. Suddenly, they've got a platform For example, it's hard to imagine a customer in a Manhattan restaurant being told after leaving a generous tip You guys who leave big tips rather than ordinary ones are screwing the average guy who tips moderately Or how about a new tenant in Chicago after signing an apartment lease being advised by a friend or acquaintance? You know, bud, you could have gotten a very similar place even bigger in Lincoln Park for half the price you keep paying those high rents in select neighborhoods and you drive up the price for the rest of Us. Nope. That's one thing. You'll never hear Americans living up in the States. Say you over tipped or you overpaid for the rent You're ruining it for the rest of us. Oh, but down here in Latin America

[06:25] You hear it all the time, especially on the tourist trail again, like Costa Rica and Panama. So why is that? Well here where the expats live where a gringo's personal history is sketchy or unknown entirely Once you get down here, basically, no one really knows you so all the restraints are off You can be a ranting blabber mouth if you wish and some gringos, especially single gringos recreate an entire bullshit previous life Lots of gringos and expats have found out they can wipe much of their slate clean leaving out all the sad and shitty parts some gringos and expats like reinventing themselves, especially after three or four divorces and kids that Prefer not to speak to them anymore except when they want something like money But that's a theme for another day

[07:10] We were talking about price obsessed gringos and expats weren't we the problem is down here in Latin America So many price obsessed gringos and expats anoint themselves as experts They like to advise new green gringos as well as fellow expats and people they've just met man I can't tell you how many times I've heard one of these gringos say something like so-and-so restaurant You don't want to go there. It's run by thieves and Look out for those uber guys and those taxis taking you to the airport. They charge double for gringos The problem is he says many gringos, especially gringo cheapskates since they've been down in a Latin country for a while They see themselves as protectors of the innocent sometimes assuming the role of wise and sage counselors to Newcomer gringos who honestly want all the help and advice they can get their pitch to the newbies is simple

[07:58] It's a dangerous world out there for newbie gringos filled with gougers and shysters Of course, there will also be many gringos and expats out there telling you to be laid back and enjoy yourself Which is a far better attitude at least for the first trip or two down then hopefully when you first come down You won't run into one of those cheapskate expat naysayers who just might put you on edge then chances Are you very much will enjoy your stay? So just note that the expat cheapskate contingent is everywhere and if you ask me George says it all started back in the 80s and 90s with Costa Rica's reputation for being one of the least expensive overseas destinations Which naturally enough drew a huge crowd of gringo cheapskates otherwise known back then as backpackers

[08:45] Needless to say many of them came down on vacation when they were college students Lived on the cheap and were amazed by it Decided someday they'd make a permanent home down there and when they came down for the second time maybe 10 or 15 years later They were sorely disappointed when things were not nearly as cheap as when they came down the first time Then he goes on to give a couple more examples, but we get the point The only thing that I might add is that often when you're running to these gringo expat cheapskates They themselves have plenty of dough Most likely because they've been penny pinchers all their lives Oh, and by the way when he talks about how cheapskates get on social media sites and start ranting well that's recent 2426 why I don't belong to any of those fake book groups nor am I on Instagram or tiktok?

[09:35] So when people send me links to things they think I should see and since I don't have an account with any of those Brain-numbing sites when I click on the link it says to view this video You must sign in or create an account which I will never do but oddly enough if someone sends me a link That's posting on X. I don't need an account to open it up I just click on it, and it's there even though I do not have an X account Anyway, that's how it isn't probably why my life's a lot less complicated than yours When speaking of emails you know people are using emails less and less aren't they it's sort of become old-school people tell me It's a boomer thing Gen X Y and Z hardly use it and laugh when they hear people do Everybody's just texting on whatsapp or signal telegram whatever fake book insta crab tiktok tiktok

[10:22] But still I do get emails and lots of them though I've had some college age listeners call me a dinosaur for not being on social media still they'll break down and cave to occasionally write me an email like for example this one from Jake he says Johnny a Few shows ago you were talking about things that bug you when you walk into the average Latin Americans household Well, he says I have an aunt and uncle living in Guadalajara, Mexico And we go down and visit him once in a while in fact my uncle's doctor Has a nice house nice car etc except when I go into his house There are some common things that bug me when I visit there, too When I get invited over it makes me very hesitant to eat there sometimes in my own aunt and uncle's house

[11:08] And I can't say it's because they're lower class. They're not they're upper middle class Nice house nice cars. They've been back and forth to the United States many times remember I said he's a doctor still I don't look forward to visiting them at their home But you know it's family and I've been going back and forth with my mom and dad since I was a kid like I said When we visit the relatives in Guadalajara oftentimes, I'm hesitant to eat there based on what I see Even sitting on the furniture and using the bathroom sometimes gives me the creeps for example They let their pets pee and poop in the house They've got the maid there to clean it up, but still and their living room and dining room furniture It's expensive stuff, but looking really gnarly many stains on the fabric makes me not want to sit there They've got a great big aquarium, too. It's sad. I feel sorry for the fish

[11:58] I say if you're gonna trap fish in a box for your personal pleasure at least have it clean enough so that you can see through it Every time I've been there. It's had a permanent film of algae all around then there's dirty smudgy light switches They've got a full-time cleaning lady, too I don't get it isn't that part of her job to give you an idea how big and expansive their houses They've got five bathrooms in an ice rather ritzy subdivision with beautiful marble walls and ceilings except in three those five bathrooms The paint or the plastic finish whatever is peeling off of the toilet seats Oh, and they've got a beautiful veranda that sweeps about halfway around the house They've got lots of hanging plants there, but can't seem to keep them alive if you can't keep them alive Don't have them dead and sickly looking house plants or overground planters infested with weeds is

[12:47] Not a good looking it doesn't have to be that way What kind of a statement are we really making when we've got dead or crispy brown leaved plants all over the house? Oh and in the kitchen they did it right real marble countertops Matching stainless steel KitchenAid appliances expensive stuff except when you're looking closely at that big expensive stainless steel fridge If you look towards the bottom skirt, there's a rust line sort of bubbling up I thought that stuff was supposed to be stainless steel. Well, it's rusting And in that beautiful kitchen, they've got about three or four beautiful glass Pendulum lights that have those Edison style light bulbs in them where you can see the filament very classy, right? Yeah, well until you look up close and you see a hundred dead bugs in the bottom of each glass lamp

[13:34] Makes you wonder what does the cleaning lady actually do? Oh and my uncle's got his own office study It's a beautiful place lined with books on IKEA shelves that are starting to decompose You know around the edges and floor level where the cleaning lady uses a wet mop After a while everything starts to swell and deteriorate in my uncle's office. He's got a beautiful hunter ceiling fan looks Fantastic when it's spinning and it works Well, except when it's not spinning and you can see what the blades look like The leading edge of every blade is bubbled up with rust I get the fact that the fan works just fine Why get rid of it? But man when it's dead still it looks like hell. All right, wait a minute Wait a minute Johnny here, you know, I must have seen that same thing a hundred times Rusted ceiling fans and he's right. They're still useful. No one does a thing about him

[14:24] No, except guys like me and other gringos and expats who don't like seeing rust on their appliances Here's the thing. It takes about a half hour to an hour to rejuvenate those things completely make them look just like brand new Although I've never seen a latino do it I know plenty of ambitious gringos who've given it a shot and fix the problem completely I've fixed five or six fans like that myself You see every ceiling fan has a blade that's connected with three little screws yet Take off the blades one by one take them outside sand off the leading edge get rid of all that rest By a can of rust oleum primer give it a few squirts and then put the final color on there Whether it's white black gray, whatever you do that You'll get another good ten years out of that fan before it starts rusting again and of course those things will rust because most of those ceiling fans are metal and

[15:11] You've got that very humid rainy season for half the year So eventually anything that's steel or not stainless steel will rust Which is why parts of your kitchen appliances and refrigerators will rust they say they're stainless steel But there may just have one or two panels that you can see that are stainless steel the rest regular steel Oh, and by the way, a lot of ceiling fans are made with wood blades, which of course don't rust But some of them are composite wood like the crap you get in IKEA And I've seen those blades swell up during the rainy season and start fraying at the edges The cool thing is though you can go on Amazon and buy a package of ceiling fan blades now admittedly There's so many styles and manufacturers Almost can never get an exact match But so what you just buy an oversized blade take a little jigsaw or belt sand or whatever

[16:00] Draw a template with a pencil from your old blade and there you have it But second time around do remember to order real wood blades not composite Melamine crap, for example, most good ceiling fans will cost at least a hundred bucks Sometimes a lot more and you can buy a pack of four to six Replacement blades for like 25 bucks. So it's a good deal. Just a few rainy season homeowners tips there So let's get back to that email. He says Johnny you struck a chord when you mentioned warped and ill-fitting doors in latin american houses How so many interior doors don't fit properly or scrape the floor and sometimes they don't close at all Which is exactly what's going on in my uncle's house in Guadalajara. He's got really nice Kaoba hardwood doors varnish

[16:45] It's really nice, too But half of them seem to have swell to the point they don't quite close nicely into the jam anymore You have to force them and where they touch the varnishes all scraped off and the passage locks for the bathroom, etc Don't lock anymore because the bolt and strike plate don't line up like they used to But instead of calling in a carpenter to fix that problem They just went to the hardware store and bought a $5 sliding deadbolt looks ugly, but it works So that's the story of my uncle's house Johnny. All right, Josh. Thanks for that I'm glad you hit on that thing about the strike plates how sooner or later doors don't line up flush anymore So they have to put an extra lock on the inside it a cheap one inevitably You shouldn't have to do that. Instead. You call in a carpenter have them level up all the doors and fix the strike plates

[17:32] That'll probably take them all of a couple hours Probably cost you 50 hundred bucks at most and you'll probably only have to do that maybe once every 10 years But Latin American homeowners almost never do that not once Oh, but there are all kinds of ways to use that nasty silicone caulk duct tape and chicken wire You'll see unbelievable awful and messy door repairs with duct tape and caulk that seemed to work for a while anyway But look like absolute horseshit and the amazing thing to me is that every single repair of anything around the house known to man Can be seen and learned sometimes in minutes on YouTube Just go to YouTube and for example type in how to fix a door that won't close or how to fix a warped or swollen door And in two seconds, you'll have ten really useful do-it-yourselfers Walking you through the step-by-step

[18:20] Again, that's one of the big differences between living in the first versus the third world that Latino Lactime thing now, of course those do-it-yourself YouTube fixes are in English But every once in a while maybe one out of ten will be in Spanish or some other language Besides that if you need to you just click a button and do an auto translate So you Latinos out there with household items in need of repair You've got no excuse except your own laziness and lack of initiative However, I will cut you a lot of slack in the tool department I know Latin Americans just don't have any tools around the house that goes for gringles and x-pads too But there are a million and one hardware stores down here and tools are pretty cheap after all most all of them are coming from China and Mexico all right moving on, you know for all you guys and girls who've been down here Latin America

[19:08] You'll always find a few gringo expat tourism rags in English They're generally published locally and you'll find them everywhere in every tourist town In fact, that's one of the first things tourists do when they land the airport They pick up a copy of the local English tourist rag to check out what's happening in the area now because Costa Rica is kind Of the flagship of gringo tourism started in the 70s 80s and 90s. Well before many of you guys were born Anyway, their flagship English tourist newspaper that most other countries like to copy is called the Tico times And once in a while one of my gringo friends still living in Costa Rica will send me an interesting article from the Tico times An article he knows that will never find its way outside the country being that it's just too harsh or controversial

[19:55] Well, he did it again. He sent me one that just came on May 6th It talks about some very harsh and nasty things going on in Costa Rica right now I'll highlight some of this article for you. I think you'll be interested It starts out Costa Rica known as one of the best places for our relaxing vacation is losing middle-class US tourists by the throngs as its costs climb compared to most other Latin American tourist destinations It's got much higher prices for lodging food transportation etc and just recently a much stronger local currency and inflation has suddenly shifted the country of Costa Rica toward an exclusive high-end tourist market raising huge red flags in their bread-and-butter middle-class tourism segment Which for the last 50 years has been the backbone of the Costa Rican economy

[20:45] Proof that Costa Rica is losing its middle-class tourism in segment came with a recent article in Yahoo Finance Entitled five vacation expenses. The middle-class Americans can't afford anymore case in point Costa Rica It says highlighting this trend Costa Rica was once known as a budget friendly destination however, a combination of currency shifts inflation Hotels rentals and Airbnb costs have pushed vacation costs for Americans far beyond What many middle-class US travelers can afford then the article quotes Casey Halloran CEO and co-founder of Costa Rican vacations Incorporated he's a longtime Costa Rican vacation specialist who said quote what we are observing in our

[21:30] Statistics is that the middle-class US traveler to Costa Rica has all but vanished For a family of four not including the flight costs. It's almost impossible to have a vacation for under $2,000 Travel CEO Halloran is quoted saying the average vacation cost in Costa Rica in Excluding flights for a family of four has risen from five thousand five hundred dollars in 2022 to seven thousand eight hundred dollars Excluding flights which Halloran says has led us tourists to choose cheaper and shorter destinations Like in Panama or the Dominican Republic Used to be he says the average was a traditional seven night stay in Costa Rica It's dropped down to just four nights and Halloran says what we're hearing now from many people who check package deal pricing

[22:22] They're experiencing sticker shock at the quote. They simply choose then to stay home Then it says the Costa Rican Tourism Institute ICT reports a 10% decline in US visitors in 2024 the Tourism Institute reports that era rivals fell 7% in 2025 marking seven months of decline They also report the average cost of inflation since 2023 have increased costs for American travelers by 20% That according to the National Costa Rican Chamber of Tourism Another big problem in Costa Rica is the crime the local newspapers almost never report the true statistics That's the kiss of death for tourism. The government reports about 7,000 crimes against tourists in the last four years

[23:11] However, the gringo living in Costa Rica that sent me this article says the following concerning crime He says Johnny I worked in tourism in Costa Rica for years the incidents of crime mentioned in the article is a huge understatement as In many countries the reporting of crime is seen as a waste of time So people just don't do it the Costa Rican Tourism Agency just plain lies about the crime statistics He says all of us living here in Costa Rica know about these lies and they're given for obvious reasons Nothing negative about the country's ever to be said it hurts tourism the goose that laid the golden egg He says Johnny here in Costa Rica foreigners are seen as easy marks and an easy source of money. It's cultural In fact, I was talking to a family member in Costa Rica just yesterday about how Costa Ricans view

[23:59] Taking advantage of gringos as acceptable and even admired and expected They've all got such stories and try to one-up each other when the subject comes up Then he says knowing what I know I wouldn't vacation in Costa Rica if someone else was paying the bail In fact, he says I remember an older Costa Rican woman telling me once Some of us believe God sends gringos here so we can rob them. She wasn't saying it in pure jest either Johnny that's a very common attitude in Costa Rica. He says I realized certain truths after living in Latin America for years Gringos sitting by the pool sipping their margaritas will say when Costa Ricans have a chance they steal because they're poor I realized it was actually vice versa Costa Ricans are poor because they steal stealing is easier than learning a skill

[24:48] All right, speaking of gringo X mass mingling with Latin Americans comes this email from Mike He says Johnny I learned my Spanish pretty well up in the States moved to Salvador for the last two years and knowing some Spanish really opened my world except Being that I've got that gringo first-world mentality, even though I spoke the Spanish language pretty well I'd say Seven or eight out of ten. I still have lots of trouble picking up on local social cues For example, and this is the source of embarrassment for me. Most Latin Americans are extremely polite They would never tell you that what you are doing is offensive or socially unacceptable Instead they will most likely smile and nod though. They won't add much to the topic. They'll hear you out You could be a thousand percent more interested in the topic than they are

[25:36] But still you might not pick up on that for a long time He says I certainly didn't when you're talking to people that seem to be interested that behavior definitely makes for a very civilized society But if you're a tell it like it is New Yorker like me It can be very hard when espousing your point of view to pick up on other people's social cues for the last few years Johnny I foolishly thought that what I was saying to the local people are doing was of genuine interest to all of those around me I had no idea. I was embarrassing myself and chasing people away I'm sure most of them were thinking here comes that blowhard gringo again My advice now is as you meet people and start talking try to let them talk more than you do Try to notice if they're genuinely interested in what you are saying

[26:22] For example, do they ask follow-up questions make decent eye contact and aren't always looking back and forth at their phone Latinos are very polite so they will stand around and listen to you blather It's a big clue if you find yourself doing all the talking Americans overseas love to talk from what I've seen though Less talking more listening would be in order. Wow. Well said good advice before we close out the show today I'd like to remind you of my upcoming August 2025 expat insider seminar Join me for that week-long boots on the ground journey. Just go to expat plan be calm Click on the seminar link and learn all about it Also, the early bird discounts are in effect until June 1st as the show is supposed to go out Friday, May 16th You've got two weeks to get in on those discounts

[27:08] So again, go to expat plan be calm and click on the seminar link and finally we have an email from hui in Los Angeles She says johnny. I know you don't like social media I'm with you 100% johnny. It's no good and super addicting now. Personally. I'm on it a lot You see Johnny. I'm using social media to find out how to cure my social media addiction Huey sounds like the hair of the dog to me You've been listening to the expat files living in Latin America If you need some help with your own plan B We can schedule a one-on-one phone or Skype consult Just send me an email the expat files at gmail dot com And if you want to get on the waiting list for my next week-long expat insider seminar in Central America Where you're guaranteed to get a two to five year head start on your plan B

[27:55] Send me an email to expat files at gmail dot com. No spammos