#1440 – Episode 1440: Water, Waste, and Wild Birds in Latin America

Automatically transcribed from the original recording; names and wording may contain errors.

[00:00] South of the border down Mexico way That's where I fell in love when the stars above came up to play and now as I wonder Hello there all you ex-pad wannabes. I'm Johnny Mueller and you're listening to the expat files living in Latin America The show that tells you just what it's like to live work play and or retire down here in Latin America It's a mix of the good the bad the ugly and the great and it's all right here. So let's get started Something strange has been happening around my house for a long long time and I just didn't notice until now You know, we're all doing our thing and which can mean day by day certain things go by that You just don't notice because they don't seem to affect you

[00:46] And of course, there are certain things that don't bother you at all. That just might bother a lot of other people and vice-versa Now, I don't know if I'm getting just a little bit sharper with old age or a little more observant doesn't seem logical But who knows? anyway, what I started to notice over the last couple of months is that in my refrigerator and In the occasional garbage bin around the house. I Notice the appearance of a stray empty plastic water bottle, you know the usual size of water bottle Most people carry around with them 500 milliliters. I think hey here in Latin America, you know You just drive down any street and you're bound to see someone carrying one of those things around and every country here in Latin America's got at least 10 maybe 20 brands of bottle water all of them in very similar looking plastic bottles

[01:33] Now, of course you longtime listeners know I do not drink water from plastic bottles I haven't done so for 20 30 years even 30 years ago. I had my own personal water purification system in most every house I've lived in I made it a point not to drink from anything plastic Well 95% of the time anyway, you know when you're out and about you can't be perfect In fact over the years. I've had many people including a few girlfriends Scold me a bit for bringing my own glass water bottle to a restaurant I know I know it looks funny like bringing your own wine or beer to a restaurant Only the cheapest of cheapskates would do that. I know you get a few strange looks but so what it's only water You guys and girls have heard me talk many times about how to purify your own water and why you should do so

[02:18] So then why should the occasional plastic water bottle empty? Of course though some half full show up around my house and in my refrigerator Well, I know if you go into anyone's pantry or look under the sink You're gonna see some empty plastic bottles or half empty ones. Some people will save them and use them for things like, you know the maintenance guy Storing some liquid in the shed or the cleaning lady storing some kind of disinfectant or liquid soap or Windex Sometimes you'll see a water bottle filled with herbs and plants some kind of indigenous medicinal compound You never know so even if you never buy a plastic bottle full of anything There are gonna be a few of them stashed around your house Filled with other stuff because they're useful. So then why am I bringing this up? Well because

[03:05] Just in the last couple of months. I started noticing one or two of those water bottles showing up in my refrigerator I'm thinking I didn't buy that stuff What's it doing here? And if that stuff is being used by the cleaning lady to store detergents and Windex and vinegar and stuff What the hell is it doing in the refrigerator? So the other day I took one out It was half filled with something took a sniff took a look at it. It was water Took me a bit to figure it out But I finally put two and two together my cleaning lady was bringing the occasional water bottle into the house So I thought why would that be? Oh, I get it while my cleaning ladies out and about she's not a living cleaning lady She's got her own house and a kid certainly when she's out and about and on her way to work She's certainly on occasion gets thirsty and buys a bottle of water

[03:52] Like everyone else does down here except the occasional eccentric gringo like me and you know maintenance guys and cleaning ladies are living on the edge So they don't throw away anything and if she's got a half a bottle of water left She just brings it with her shoves in the refrigerator leaves it there for another day waste not want not then I thought to myself It's a shame. She makes so little Yet she buys bottled water outside for her family and kid like all Latin Americans do she has to because if you drink the local Tap water you get sick. I thought wow I've got this fantastic super pure water being made with my purification system producing so much extra water daily My system could certainly produce 50 ultra pure gallons of water a day 10 times as much per day than I'll ever need

[04:37] I thought you know what? I'm gonna let her take all the water she can with her bring it home So she doesn't have to buy it anymore And I'm just talking about the money here because there's no use going through this thing about impure water and plastic nano particles And forever chemicals and all that that stuff's just not on any Latinos radar down here Maybe with lag time maybe five or ten years from now But presently most all of them are just not interested if you try to train them up or clue them into the problem They'll just think you're an eccentric anal gringo After all they've been drinking bottled water out of plastic containers for generations down here anyway. I thought there's a good deed I'm just gonna tell her to fill her water bottles up bring more empties as many empties as she wants I'll fill them up She can take them with her not only will she save some dough

[05:24] But there'll be a better health outcome for her and her family as well Even though she won't know it so feeling rather pleased with myself about a week and a half ago I sat her down at the end of work day, and I said this is your water bottle isn't it? I found it in the refrigerator. I seem to be finding a lot of these lately. It was half filled She looked at me with a strange face I walked over to the sink where there's a little spigot a spout Where my pure water comes out my entire purification systems under the sink I've got four canisters down there and a nice big two gallon reservoir the first canister is a spin-down filter You know what that is it's 15 microns Auto flush with a clear housing that I can flush when it looks like it's getting a little clogged up or brown or gray

[06:09] That's the sediment filter. You might never have to replace that filter only clean and flush it once in a while Then I've got a five micron carbon block filter after that canister number three is Colloidal silver impregnated point one micron ceramic filter and canister number four another carbon block filter It's the final treatment phase. They call it polishing your water I'm telling you my water is so pure you could use it in a kidney dialysis machine anyway I took my cleaning ladies half filled plastic bottle of water and filled it up in front of her Topped it off put the cap back on and put in front of her and said from now on I want you to take all The free water you can possibly carry take it from my purifier here There's no need for you to ever buy water again, and if you can manage it

[06:56] I'll fill up a five gallon container one of those got-a-phones. They're called their plastic too Of course, I said if you manage the weight of that thing is five gallons and get it on the chicken bus Just take five gallons at time anytime you want bring it home Well, she was all smiles and ever so thankful and I felt really pleased with myself my good deed for the day for the month Until about two days ago. That's when my girlfriend set me down and said There's a little bit of an embarrassing problem going on here that I have to tell you about Trouble in River City as they say because you see my girlfriend talks to the cleaning lady in perfect Spanish Of course, they get along and talk about well, you know, Latina girl stuff. Anyway, she said Johnny There's a little situation developing here The cleaning lady is too embarrassed to say anything about it, but she doesn't like your water

[07:44] Oh, but she really appreciates the offer of free water and all and would love to oblige But she doesn't like the taste of your water I said the taste of my water my water has absolutely no taste. That's the beauty of it It's completely pure free of chlorine fluorine plastics Antibiotics forever chemicals and my girlfriend said yeah, I know I know I know She said I thought of explaining all that to her, but it won't do any good She just doesn't like the taste of your water because she's used to water coming out of plastic tubs and bottles She's used to water that has a taste you and I would call it a sort of unnatural Plastic taste funny thing too as she was pointing that out to me We were sitting on a veranda patio wouldn't you know it a big flatbed truck rolled by with at least

[08:30] 200 big five gallon plastic bottles of water no canvas or metal top on that truck No protection at all wide open to the environment being bathed in tropical sunlight And of course then they drop it off at a tienda or supermarket It sits in the Sun on a pallet for a couple of more hours before they haul it in I've walked up to those pallets and stacks of water bottles Some of them are cool in a room temperature when they're in the shade, but when in the Sun Sometimes you can't touch the plastic bottle for more than five seconds without some discomfort from the heat We're shed a lot of those bottles. They've been using over and over aren't transparent anymore They're kind of frosty inside you know what that means don't you layer upon layer of plastic has been leaching out anyway after hearing all

[09:16] That it brought to mind a little discussion I had with an expat who came to one of my seminars a couple years back He was a plant engineer up in the states by trade recently retired loan for his plan B in Guatemala He said Johnny. I've got a great idea for a business a water bottling company It's like printing money. You know what the markup is on bottled water. He said he says I know all about it You buy or rent a very small piece of land in a city or near it You dig a well which down here costs between three to five thousand bucks and down in Latin America You need no permits or environmental impact studies either as long as you're not in a tourist area And as long as you're slightly outside the city limits Well, he said you use sand as a pre-filter carbon and ultraviolet light as the post filters

[10:02] And it'll pass any government test even up in the first world well in the end nothing ever came of that That was a couple of years ago, and I haven't heard from the guy since though He did move down to Guatemala and has a very flourishing online business now or so I'm told he skipped the bottled water idea anyway I was thinking if here or any other gringo got into that kind of business sure it's like having a printing press But you would definitely have to bottle the end product in plastic and maybe leave it out in the Sun for a couple hours Or the same thing is gonna happen to you that happened to me and my cleaning lady If not the local Latinos and latinas are just not gonna like the taste of your water By the way, I remember very well when I first came down here to Latin America those five-gallon jugs were everywhere And they're everywhere now the difference is back then they were all glass five-gallon jugs

[10:53] Heavy as hell to and of course with glass. There's always breakage here and there So when those plastic got a phones those five-gallon jugs got introduced the Latino population dove right in First of all a big five-gallon glass jug is thick and heavy really heavy and of course the water It holds is very heavy So lugging those glass jugs up and down stairs a real pain often a real problem Plus again here in Latin America almost everyone's got a tile a concrete floor. So lots of break it I kind of wonder what happened all those jugs there were millions of them down here now Everything's plastic kind of a sad end of an era sort of thing and man back then there was a hell of a lot Less water pollution because even if a glass bottle or jug ended up in the drink. It's sunk to the bottom somewhere And plastic bottles man, you know what that stuff looks like when it's in the water floats on the surface looks like shit

[11:44] Decompose is contaminating the water and everything in it Of course, it's not good when glass breaks and goes to the bottom of the ocean or a sea or a lake or a river At least fish and marine animals don't eat it like they do plastic The thing is as any scuba or snorkeler will tell you sure they see chunks of glass set the bottom everywhere But the movement of river and ocean waters have a way of rounding off the sharp edges So they're not a problem in that sense I'm sure you've walked along the beach and saw various colorful rough-looking stones with rounded edges That turned out to be a piece of a pop bottle So broken glass in water a problem, but not a big persistent problem compared to plastic in the water You know, this might sound strange But I always wondered how long does it take for water in the sea or the ocean to smooth out the edges and turn a piece

[12:35] Of glass rounded frosted and pitted. Yeah, I know wondering about things like that is eccentric and weird, but that's what I am Of course, it depends how much tumbling the glass can endure and the waves are the rocks crashing and rubbing against it, etc So I asked AI chat GPT It said it takes on average seven to ten years to turn a piece of shredded glass into something that's called sea glass That's smooth edges and frosty and pitted in case you were wondering which you probably weren't So then just file that in the useless trivia part of your brain. Oh and on the same note Have you heard about coca-cola? Well for the sixth consecutive year coca-cola has been named the worst plastic polluter in all the world Sheesh, what kind of award do you get for that coca-cola sells more than one billion

[13:24] single-use plastic bottles annually Mostly ending up in landfills rivers and streams. Oh and into the mouths of dolphins whales and turtles So in a recent report from Oceana a nonprofit conservation organization That checks various sea pollution levels around the world It says that coca-cola plastic products and bottles will contribute approximately 1.3 Billion with a B pounds of waste to the world's oceans and waterways yearly God, I remember as a kid when coca-cola only came in glass bottles even the big 32 and 64 ounce jobs Were in glass bottles by the way, you know a while back someone asked me Johnny if coca-cola and all the soft drink

[14:10] Manufacturers switched from glass to plastic by around 1980 how come none of the beer companies abandoned glass for plastic and don't jump to the Conclusion that beer would lose its fizz in a plastic bottle coca-cola and all the other soft drinks don't have that problem I'm sure you've noticed you still get that carbonated fizz just fine when you pop the top So anyway while back I was sitting with a few ex-pass and the subject came up Why it no beer in plastic bottles everything else is in plastic bottles One gringo chimed in you can't have a decent bar fight if the beer bottles are plastic Then an Aussie expat in the crowd said they did it It's been tried in Australia He said a couple of beer companies switched to plastic bottles, but it just did not take off

[14:56] He said it just ain't manly mate. It's okay for the Sheila's but for blokes. No way So glass bottles water bottles soda bottles, whatever. That's the way to go But remember this as one of my nerdy industrial engineering buddies points out at the processing plant where they make and fill those bottles The pumps and valves tubes screens filters, etc mostly plastic So don't pat yourself on the back when you pay extra for a Pellegrino water or Perrier Thinking because it's glass bottle you're doing your part to save the world saving the dolphins the turtles etc Helping make tuna fish sandwiches safe for the world again used to love that stuff then came the mercury in the heavy metals But wait a minute. Wait a minute. Let's not dump on a coca-cola too badly now to their credit

[15:45] Coca-cola has announced an initiative to permanently attach the plastic bottle cap to the plastic bottle to reduce cap litter Wow Amazing I wonder who thought of that genius move someone at coke needs to get the presidential medal of honor Don't you think how about let Biden give it to him and at the same time? Why not give one to his kid hunter too though? I am old enough to remember when aluminum cans had pop tops that actually popped off So there were millions of them all over the ground in ditches rivers lakes walkways Then someone figured out how to keep the pop top stuck to the can So there is some progress on the pollution issue and fits and starts and you know That's one of the things I hate about Latin America after a storm all the plastic garbage floats out of its hiding place

[16:31] All right moving on. Let's take an email from Ari an expat living in El Salvador He says Johnny a few shows ago you talked about the phrase sin virguenza without shame Along with that you were talking about people's most embarrassing moments. Well, I got one for you See if you can top this About a year ago. I went on a Latin cubit dating site. I was talking to a few girls I'd honed by preferences down to a very nice beautiful Latina girl. We'd been talking for a couple of weeks We hadn't actually had a date yet So we decided to meet for a first date in the daytime in the Central Plaza in downtown San Salvador a very nice place For a first date nice safe wide open lots of restaurants and cool places things to do

[17:17] So we were all set ready to meet in the park one o'clock Manana time in a certain place that had an artsy display I got there a little early as gringos do no problem. Beautiful day I had a nice little bounce in my stride knowing I was gonna meet a girl who sort of checked all the right Boxes as I entered the park. I saw her sitting far away on a bench She saw me too from a distance stood up faced me as I get closer about 20 feet from her now A bird took a shit on my head at first. I didn't know it was bird shit I just felt something on my head So I put my hand up there now my hand and my head were filled with bird shit Johnny was certainly the most embarrassing thing that ever happened to me in my life Well, the young lady saw the whole thing and neither of us knew whether to laugh or cry

[18:02] Both of us turned red and both of us were speechless and in that terrible moment The only thing I could think was what would Jesus have done? So Johnny Can you or your listeners top that signed airy PS stay tuned for part 2 the aftermath? Oh Man, airy. Is that karma? Maybe is there someone upstairs that doesn't like you? Anyway, Ari I can't beat that story But I can't tell you a sort of a similar thing happened to me when I was power walking one day in the dr The Dominican Republic in an area called El Malecon right on the ocean where there's lots of people lots of activity No, gringo is really though. We're talking about Santo Domingo All the gringo tourists are in Bávaro and Punta Cana on the other side of the island about four hours away

[18:49] Anyway, one evening around 7 o'clock. I was power walking down the Malecon the very nice walkway Parkway along the ocean in Santo Domingo, Dominican Republic And I'd say it takes about 30 minutes If you're power walking to go from one end to the other at least the part where all the activities are taking place Where all the locals are hanging out Well, I was about 10 minutes into the walk about halfway through when a bird took a shit on my head in the moment I did the same thing as airy. I didn't know I had shit on my head I just felt something up there. So I reached up and touched it now. I had bird shit on my head and my hand Luckily though I was about 30 feet from the ocean so I could walk over there and at least wash off my hand But my head needless to say I felt like a complete jerk

[19:34] Even though I didn't know anyone there and I knew I had a 20-minute walk back to the hotel Sort of gives you a deeper understanding of the word shithead. So Arie I know what it's like the feeling anyway Though I can't imagine what it's like to have that feeling on your way to meet a girl on a first date For simple shame and embarrassment. I think Ari your story tops them all though We may have some listeners out there who can top it. I guess we'll find out so stay tuned All right moving on. Here's a little story from mr. CL a cool little story that definitely has a moral aimed specifically at gringos and expats and I'll edit and paraphrase this a bit cut out the boring parts The working title of this screed is what every gringo should know before he walks into any

[20:20] Latin American appliance store it starts out by saying let's begin with a simple assumption You're a gringo living in Latin America, and you just want to go into an appliance store and buy a blender nothing fancy Just a basic blender that'll whip up a smoothie or a couple of margaritas in a hurry So you walk into a store appliance store hardware store, whatever They generally have all kinds of brands different sizes different models You ask the first attendant you meet who you know works there. Where are the blenders the liquid orders in espanol? liquid orders you walk along with her and suddenly you're met with a wall of different blenders a Dazzling display many with names you've never heard of and none which are accompanied by any helpful staff for clear pricing

[21:05] The attending lady who led you there is equally useless You see some familiar brands like black and Decker, but you didn't know black and Decker makes blenders You thought they only made cheap drills and sanders There are lots and lots of unknown blender brands to like techno master Maybe spelled m-a-b-e and tekka t-e-k-a familiar ones to like Sunbeam and Oster With Oster and queasy nard being by far the most expensive They all look pretty much the same from a distance But as you get closer you see some are all plastic and some have a glass blending jar Which obviously separates the men from the boys the glass ones are more expensive. Okay, so that's a clue that helps But you're thinking you only use it once in a while. You don't want to go for the high-price models

[21:51] So you buy a model that looks decent sleek black base plastic picture mysterious brand name But hey a blend is a blender you pay for it But you can't bring it home right now because as you walk out the door Someone stops you you give them the receipt they unpack it plug it in Give the motor a few worlds to prove to you that it works and all the little extra parts and accessories are in the box They do that with everything you buy in a hardware or appliance store here in Latin America TVs refrigerators Stoves ovens washing machines microwave ovens boom boxes. Do they still have those anything with a motor or lights? Anything that plugs into an outlet unlike in the station don't pay for it and walk out you pay for it Then you're directed to a little table by the exit where someone unpacks it plugs it in

[22:41] Shows you all the parts and accessories gives you a little slip that tells how long your guarantee or warranty is Generally a year sometimes longer sometimes much shorter. Anyway, I bought that basic sleek black blender Set it up on a counter and didn't actually use it for about a week and a half When I first used it the cleaning lady happened to be there. She comes once a week She sees what you're doing and says no campraste oaster, which means you didn't buy an oaster Now I speak a little Spanish so I understood what she said She says oaster blenders are the only ones worth buying. They come with vassos de video That means thick glass jars that can handle boiling hot water And a bit of knocking around without breaking or cracking though. The blades eventually will break or jam up

[23:29] Replacements are sold at many hardware stores She said the things are repairable to every appliance guy in town can fix one All the while you're thinking what's she going on about i'm a gringo What does she know then a week later? After about five smoothies and two margaritas The thing started emitting funny noises And it started leaking from the base Share the things under warranty But the repair department says come back and get it in two weeks So you drop it off along with the receipt and as you're walking through this door towards the entrance You feel a little foolish as you gaze warily at the row of oaster blenders That were just about 20 percent more Than the price you paid For the techno master plastic job that you just brought back

[24:15] All right, mr CL thanks for that, but i've got a story too When I first got down here to latin american had to outfit my house with various appliances and such There really was not much of a selection in any of the hardware or appliance stores We're talking about the early 90s before the chinese started manufacturing everything. Anyway in the tv department There was only sony and panasonic and with washer dryers gee whirlpool and admiral And with blenders Oaster only oaster And back then there were two models one with a dial and one with buttons I bought the cheaper one the one with the dial that thing lasted 20 years Through a million smoothies and a half million margaritas So when it finally bit the dust I went to the local hardware store surprise surprise

[25:03] There were a dozen no-name brands a few I recognized black and decker sunbeam, etc And three different oaster models I bought the intermediary one From a distance. It looked almost the same as the 20 some year old one that pooped out on me Only on closer inspection it weighed about half as much. I thought not good. It lasted about three months So what I did was go on amazon and bought a complete replacement kit for the original oaster Cost maybe 20 bucks replace the guts and it's working good as new Should have done that in the first place, but who knew now said about that by the way Did you see the latest on trump? Never a dull moment when it comes to him, man Every day, there's new negative headlines in the lame stream media. They just continue to hate on him

[25:52] But this article I like is from the hill. It says president trump confirmed sunday that he offered to send troops into mekki kol But said the country's president claudia shine balm is terrified of the cartels and she won't do it A day earlier shine balm said she rejected trump's offer for american troops to be shipped south of the border It appears she just doesn't want to standoff between american troops and her cartels And of course, you know, he's designated cartels as terrorist organizations Which basically means you get severe and show no mercy way to go Meanwhile trump said after he made the offer and she refused She's a lovely woman. All right, but she's so afraid of cartels. She can't walk going on He said she's so afraid of the cartel. She can't even think straight

[26:39] Hmm that's not surprising because you know if you live in mexico It's well known that the sinaloa and jalesco cartels have completely infiltrated the mexican government That includes the police and the military too. So how's that plan b of yours coming? You're still thinking about mexico Well, as you certainly know if you listen to this show, it's not recommended. However, if you are serious about a plan b There's no better way to get started than to come to my august 2025 expat insider seminar It's a week long starts friday august 15th We'll have boots on the ground in two countries guatemala and el solvador And you will be drinking from the fire hose for all the info and sign-up details Just go to expat plan b.com and click on the seminar link

[27:24] Oh, and don't forget if you sign up by june 1st, you're in on the early bird discounts Do check it out at expat plan b.com You've been listening to the expat files living in latin america If you need some help with your own plan b we can schedule a one-on-one phone or skype consult Just send me an email the expat files at gmail.com And if you want to get on the waiting list for my next week long expat insider seminar in central america Where you're guaranteed to get a two to five year head start on your plan b. Send me an email the expat files at gmail.com No spamos