#226 – Expat Life in Latin America: Seminars, Markets, and Success Stories

Automatically transcribed from the original recording; names and wording may contain errors.

[00:00] South of the border down Mexico way That's where I fell in love when the stars above came up to play and now as I wonder My thoughts ever stray Hi everybody I'm Johnny Mueller and you're listening to the expat files Living in Latin America the show that tells you what it's really like to live work play and or retire in Latin America I tell it just like it is so let's get started Well, I'm just catching my breath from the seminar We just had off the tourist trail down in Guatemala tramps and all over the place with about 25 to 35 people And you know for the seminars, we've got about 9 or 10 people including translators and drivers helping to make everything happen

[00:48] And since this is the third world Occasionally things do go wrong with the logistics What I mean is though we may be first-world gringos the rest of Latin America is permanently on manana time That's just the way it is down here now Like I said before on these seminars I like to take just 24 attendees because one of the particularly nice Colonial hotels that we stay in only has about 28 rooms So we've got 24 rooms for the attendees and the rest for the expat wisdom staff and actually this time we had 21 new attendees and about three or four repeat offenders You know people who came down to previous seminars and by the way Since I've discovered that a certain percentage of people actually do want to be repeat offenders I've decided that from now on I'm gonna make it a policy that if you are one of my expat wisdom alumni from a previous

[01:39] Seminar not only gonna give you a huge discount if you decide to come down again I'm also gonna offer special side trips with me and my expat wisdom staff to places like Lake Atitlan Roatan copan the ruins of peten the Caribbean coast of Central America and to one or more of those Decameron resort hotels that I thoroughly discussed in one of my two recent past shows And if you remember what I said about that Decameron deal I mentioned that it just might be one of the undiscovered retirement secrets of a lifetime But of course since everything at the Decameron is in Spanish only maybe one in a hundred thousand gringos has any idea it even Exists at all. So once again, let me repeat I'm gonna be offering very very special little Latin American side trips in the future probably two or three a year

[02:29] But this will only be for expat wisdom seminar alumni We'll be going to many of my own personal off the tourist trail gems many of which you can find in my report on the expat Wisdom site called 17 undiscovered Paradises and I think most of you might have that report by now if not go to expat wisdom.com and get it It's free So if you tag along with me and my gang on any one of these upcoming trips You'll have that big leg up that none of us expats had when we first came down and that's for sure Including me. I mean after all I was a clueless green gringo expat once too In fact, it took me a couple years to realize just how clueless I was So anyway, I'm recording this show today just one day after the finish of my latest seminar and how did it go?

[03:15] Well, let's see. Where do I start? Well, first of all, I'm sure you'd like to get it from the horse's mouth So in a few weeks or maybe in a few months after all this is the third world, you know I'll have some interviews and comments from a few of the people that came down but from my point of view Well, it was a big success. That is no robberies. No kidnappings No hanky-panky though I could be wrong about that since I didn't go out partying with that certain percentage of the gang that like to come home at 3 in the morning Anyway regarding the topic of safety and danger issues during our business health care and IT tour the three days on the road After the main seminar that is we all loaded up in the buses and headed to the highest first world style areas of Guatemala So we saw how the three to five percenters lived with their bodyguards and SUVs and first world shopping centers

[04:05] And we had a very good taste of the lower Socioeconomic conditions too and on the low end one morning. I took our group to one of the craziest wildest most chaotic and eye-opening Street markets in all of Latin America. In fact, it's so big you could get lost in there forever If you didn't have a GPS Now this place is in a permanent location in what you'd call a bad section of Guatemala City And by the way, if you go on the US State Department website You'll find that all of Guatemala City and basically all of Guatemala and Latin America in general are terribly bad parts of the world And should be off-limits to Americans according to the US State Department. And what's my take on that? Thank you. Thank you State Department for all that wonderful wonderful Propaganda that keeps all that first world riff raff out of my little piece of paradise

[04:53] But let me just say right now that that marketplace I took everyone to is not at all on my list of little pieces of paradise in Latin America That's for sure But it's a hell of a great place to get a good deal if you've got the balls to go in there and start haggling Now, let me just repeat. I took my little group to many nice first-class places in Guatemala And I also took him to a few places that I too was afraid to visit when I first got down here based on all the rumors I had heard in fact that gigantic Chaotic street market that I took the little group to is a perfect example of this because in fact It took me two years to work up the nerve to visit that street market myself But that was a long time ago And now I go there about every two weeks and stock up on the cheapest best and freshest produce and vegetables

[05:43] In the country short of having your own victory gardener living on a farm yourself and believe me It's not just a vegetable and produce market that takes up only about one-sixth of the space The fact is you can buy just about anything there from shoes to tools to flowers to meat appliances chainsaws Animals you name it. They've got it not to mention knives machetes and all sorts of pyrotechnics And yes, they have everything and anything in the world That's pirated too and everything but everything there costs about a quarter or less of what you pay for the same thing up in The first world so now you've got to be wondering what happened when we drove our two buses into the place to drop off 20 or 30 wide-eyed gringos in the midst of all that chaos

[06:28] Well, first of all, the place is so busy and wall to wall with masses of humanity buying and selling that it takes about a half An hour to drive about three blocks with everyone hawking their wares and jutting in and out between cars Motorcycles vans and chicken buses So after about a half hour of inching through that traffic We pulled into a parking lot just loaded with a lot of Busted and bashed up cars and vans all fighting it out for the limited parking spots or trying to wiggle their way out of the place too without accumulating another dent or two But parking lot dents are a fact of life down here and you've got to get used to it If you hang around here for any length of time and let me tell you in that parking lot you have Absolutely zero personal and vehicular space

[07:14] I mean they wedge vehicles in that place like the world's biggest jigsaw puzzle and After having a look at how those cars and buses are jammed in there It's just impossible to believe you could ever get your car out of there in one piece But the attendance seemed to do it. Don't ask me how now this was the only place during the whole seminar and the post tour the Business and health care and IT tour that I actually told people to dress way down when we go there We didn't want to stick out like stupid rich gringos, you know Well, we pretty much accomplished that and even though as they say it was butthole to elbow in there And it really was believe me We kind of loosely hung together and people in our group did haggling by yet We didn't have a single incident Except for a moment when a couple of small drunk looking guys came up to one of our group and asked for a dollar

[08:05] But nothing really came of that incident. And nope as far as I know they didn't get the dollar either Well, and by the way, I forgot to tell you didn't matter that we dressed down We were still sticking out like sore thumbs because we were a head taller at least than everybody else there Now on that road that be blazed through those steaming hordes of humanity And I mean we had to elbow our way through this crowd The fact is we saw nothing but smiles coming from the natives They seemed quite happy to have us there and even though we were the only gringos in that mass of hundreds and hundreds of people That is hundreds and hundreds of very poor short brown people just trying to scratch out a living Even though it was a big surprise to see all these gringos passing by for them It was business as usual and no one except for those two drunk guys hassled us one bit

[08:57] Well, you might say Johnny that's all well and good because you got strength in numbers you had 20 or 30 people in there But let me repeat. I've been to that market dozens and dozens of times and true I usually take along 80 or another person But I have done it alone and have never once had a problem And by the way, where do you think all the restaurants and street vendors buy their food at these big chaotic central markets? Of course, every big Latin American city has one and you know what you never see upscale latin shopping there Ever because you know what it's beneath them to be seen shopping at places like that for them The big market is for the lower classes They prefer to pay double at Costco or Walmart where they can leave their SUV in the parking lot and wear their jewelry

[09:44] While they're shopping, but the dirty little secret is most of these upscale ladies still send their maids and cleaning ladies To the central market at least once a week, even though the boss lady won't step foot within a mile of the place Now another question might ask is why don't you see any gringos there? Well, that's because when you're off the tourist trail like I prefer you don't see gringos practically anywhere the exception being when you're in a big international first-world style hotel like the Intercontinental or the Princess or the Clarion or the Marriott because that's where international businesses charities and government Organizations hold their conferences For example, our seminar group had two days in one of those big international hotels just to settle everyone in and get if you're one comfortable in a third world climate and

[10:32] In the lobby, we noticed all kinds of people walking around in little blue suits. And what was that all about? Well, it was a hundred or so people there for an Amway convention Amway You mean that still exists? Well down here in Latin America pyramid retail schemes like Amway and Avon and Mary Kay and such they're alive and well So when the company bigwigs come in from the States, they certainly don't stay in the local hotels Even though they're much cheaper. They prefer the international franchise hotels in big city business districts Oh and on the first day when everyone checked in this big hotel There was another convention going a 3m convention So in these big hotels, there are always a few gringos floating around But they rarely wander outside of a few blocks of their hotel to mix with the real people

[11:21] After all, they read the State Department website to now didn't they and get this more than a few of the seminar attendees Reported to me that when they were on their plane coming in from the States or wherever The majority of the gringos on the same flight were from US church groups charity organizations or private medical missions from up in the States Yeah, and you can spot those do go to brigades coming out the airport doors from a mile away Always there's a group of pale tall gringos in their Patagonia Timberland and LL Bean adventure gear it never fails They're always decked out in gear That's worth more than a couple years of the average man's salary down here, but I guess it's the thought that counts, right? Anyway, as I promised we were definitely off the tourist track though when we did hit Antigua, Guatemala

[12:08] There were quite a few eco tourists and people who came down just to learn their Spanish and do immersion programs and such What I mean is if you're doing a Spanish immersion program, you're not the typical tourist at all not really and Antigua Guatemala is an absolutely great place to do that kind of thing and there are dozen other cities off the tourist trail in Central America where you can do those immersion programs dirt cheap though It's best to come down here and negotiate the deal. Never do it over the internet and Never pay the price that they're asking Even though it might seem like a really good deal to you The only people that aren't into haggling down here are first-time travelers or green gringos And by the way, skip the Spanish immersion programs in tourist places like Costa Rica and Panama

[12:54] They're twice the price and as soon as you walk out the front door of the family that you're staying with People on the street are gonna speak English to you and that's not what you want So what about the 20-something people who came down for my latest seminar again a very eclectic group Predictably unpredictable and each one with his own reasons for wanting to come down to Latin America and scope it out And each one of them basically looking to leave the first world Immediately or in the very near future and when you get a bunch of people like that together It makes for very cool and profound Conversation at least most of the time by that I mean the whole time they were down here I never heard one single word mentioned about sports or the Kardashians. Oh, I'd take that back about the Kardashians I heard one of our seminarians say did I say seminarian?

[13:41] Anyway, he said he'd pay big money to see the Kardashians OD on Hiawaska Hey, if it was on YouTube, I'd watch it, too And you know the people that came down kept saying the same thing They want to leave the US because of taxes because of health care because of big pharma big brother and the IRS and the Military and the TSA, you know the usual suspects plus each and every one of our attendees had his own Specific gripes about the first world that all made sense to me And it might be legitimate to ask if these people were preppers or survivalists or dyed in the wool Leftists or rightists or libertarians well, it didn't seem to matter because they were all basically eyes wide open realists and all worried as they should be about what's coming down the line next up in the first world and

[14:31] Busy making plans for their own futures when the next crisis hits In fact, some of them had plans ABC Andy already in place Now for those of you who might be wondering expat Eddie wasn't there But I spoke to him on the phone yesterday and his only comment was Johnny. How do you do it? How do you give seminars to people who are smarter than you are and I said Eddie it's easy Just show them what you've got from the heart Don't push or try to sell them anything show them exactly what it's like to live down here as an expat gringo Show them firsthand about a hundred examples of the gringo advantage take them to a few great restaurants Throw in a few bad jokes and the rest will take care of itself That's the secret and it works every time But there are always one or two people in every seminar that don't quite get it

[15:18] But I'll save that topic for the next show. So stay tuned Anyway, you might ask were there any sticky situations? Did anything bad happen to our little group? Did anybody have a bad trip or go mia? well The seminars over everyone's accounted for kind of and in fact at least four attendees have decided to stay here more or less Permanently in other words, they're here now and don't have any definite plans on returning and remember about five months ago That's exactly what happened at our last seminar to some people came down to the seminar They're still here and they say it's the best move they ever made In fact a pair of them came to this seminar to not as expat wannabes or green expats at all But as full-fledged expats with a real head start and I did say that about four people are staying down here permanently

[16:07] Not only that there's another half dozen people who are still down here who've taken off on Exploratory journeys of their own all with quite diverse backstories like for example a guy who I'll call Chris craft for the sake of Anonymity who has been living for quite some time up on the California coast in his 44-foot boat paying rent in an expensive US marina he's looking to do the exact same thing down here in Latin America live on his boat in a marina Down here where the weather is not only much nicer But he'll probably pay maybe a quarter of what he's paying up in the first world So he's off on that journey right at this minute checking marinas and waterways and doing his own feasibility study So right after the seminar, I pointed him in the right direction and off he went now

[16:54] You see the thing is setting off on your own down here in Latin America Not knowing much Spanish or maybe not trying to scout out locations like that or even looking for business opportunities Well, that could be a very difficult thing to do on your own if you've never really been down here for any length of time and that's what the seminars are for to put you on the fast track obviously and According to the seminar attendees one of the biggest hurdles they had to get over to come down here in the first place Was naturally their own friends and relatives to a person not only did their friends or relatives think they were nuts Some were even warned about being caught up in the next revolution or being captured by Amazonian cannibals Which just goes to show how brilliant those Americans back in Cleveland are since the Amazon's in the southern hemisphere on another continent

[17:41] Completely I say three cheers for the US public school system. Hmm Well, here's something that may or may not surprise you nearly everyone who took the seminar came up to me at some time or another and Said Johnny I have this great idea You know what they need down here or over there or in this area or in that place I must have heard three or four dozen very good business ideas every couple of hours or so In fact, these are ideas coming from a group most of who'd never been down here before Which reminds me now of so many emails that I get saying Johnny if or when I come down to Latin America What business do you suggest I get into? What's a good opportunity for me? Well, you know what? I don't even answer those emails because obviously they haven't been listening too closely to my shows

[18:30] first of all I don't suggest you come up with some grand business idea up in the states and make a lot of plans to transfer it south of The border if you've never been down here before and I don't suggest you go to places like Costa Rica or Panama on the tourist Trail and brainstorm your business ideas there either because you're just gonna end up Reinventing the wheel and having a lot of competition. You might as well stay back up in the states The whole key to success and business down here for gringos is the fact first of all that you've got that gringo advantage And not to mention you've got a high level of education compared to locals and you've seen how successful Businesses have worked up in the states just by walking into them and buying their products and services and seeing how cutthroat the competition is So you're coming down here with a great eye for detail and because of that lag time effect meaning that it always takes some time

[19:21] Sometimes years even a decade for example in the case of cordless drills and tools and the Toyota Prius For those products it did take about a decade to reach here after they first appeared in the US The fact is sometimes us expats seem clairvoyant with our business ideas. For example a year or so ago I was in Copan Honduras when I heard a gringo say I've been looking around this town all day And I can't find a donut a good old American donut the well There's an opportunity now, right and you know There is another class of email that I rarely respond to and those are when people say hey Johnny I'm a financial analyst or Johnny I'm a history teacher or a chemical engineer or a bricklayer or a tile setter They ask gee Johnny if I come down to Latin America with my skills and my education

[20:11] I guess it should be pretty easy for me to get a job in my field Considering there are a lot of American companies down there in schools that need services and they're looking for gringos Like you said, I mean that gringo advantage must work for accountants and bricklayers, too Right and our skills are well first world not third world Latin American, you know Well, guess what bud? You'll get a job in about two seconds But you're gonna get paid 300 damn bucks a month like everybody else does down here down here If you have a specific first world career The only way you're gonna make first world money is if you've been shipped down by a first world company to do a contract Down here in Latin America, but if you're a mechanic up in Cleveland Let's say and you come down here looking for a job on your own and you're looking to get hired by a company down here

[20:56] Even a first world franchise company. In other words, you want to work for the man down here Like you worked for the man up north. You're a company man. You're used to working for somebody else Well, the only way you're gonna make really decent money down here and it's not even talking first world money I mean 30 grand a year and you're living like a king. Believe me So how can you make that 30 grand a year or 40 or even 50 now? This is important My point is the only way gringos and expats really make good money down here is to not work for the man But have your own business sell your own products or services Don't think you're gonna come down here and work as a CPA and live the life of Riley. You'll get a job All right, provided you speak enough Spanish, but you're fooling yourself if you think you're gonna make first world though

[21:43] But if you come down here for a month or two and scope things out off The tourist trail or even come down to one of my seminars and stay a few days I guarantee after a while your mind will be spinning with ideas And if you're just coming down here to scout out a place to retire Well, your mind will be spinning with ideas, too That's just the way it is down here in Latin America off the tourist trail again It's like a puzzle with a lot of missing pieces There are a lot of holes to fill and you spot those holes in the locals Don't gaps in that puzzle are everywhere and the longer you're down here the more you'll spot them In fact, it's usually like this once you're down here a year or so You've got so many ideas spinning around your head your brain almost gets vapor locked I mean, it's like going to a restaurant with just too many choices on the menu

[22:31] Now I know some of you who've not been down here yet Well think I'm blowing air out of my butthole or you think I'm exaggerating for a fact, but I'm telling you it's really true That said now Let me tell you a little story that I've never told before because I didn't want people to think I was blowing smoke Here's a story that sounds really fantastic from the get-go And I haven't mentioned it once in two and a half years So here goes and the only reason why I'm mentioning it now is because I've got about 20 first-world witnesses All the people that came on my expat wisdom business tour a few days ago So if you think I'm blowing smoke these guys will back me up now You might know after my three-day seminar I offer a post tour a combined business healthcare and technology tour where I take my seminar group right in the thick of things

[23:21] We visit hospitals and businesses and factories and we scot out some real estate Then we hit a bit of the technology sector I try to give everybody a good overview of what's going on down here And I always take the group to visit some of my own personal gringo friends who become big successes in one area or another This time I took the post tour group about 20 to 25 people to visit a gringo expat friend of mine a business owner in fact I'm multiple business owner who came down here about 32 years ago when he was a backpack and hippie in the mid to late 70s and Orphan no less and him and his two brothers ended up down here living permanently in marrying Latin American girls So what's so special about this story? Well, let me start out by saying he owns a hardwood forest with over

[24:12] 100,000 rainforest hardwoods like for example teak and kauba and rainforest mahogany and a number of other Rare and very expensive rainforest hardwoods and most of his trees are 15 years old Which means soon they'll be ready to harvest and what are they worth? Each trunk is worth at least $5,000 so do the numbers. I don't have a calculator, but it sounds like 50 million to me nice business, man That would be cool But he also owns along with his two brothers a textile mill with about 200 employees. They make carpets Well, very cool. You might say but guess who they make carpets for they've made custom carpets for Guys like Steven Spielberg the Queen of England his carpets are in Buckingham Palace and Windsor Castle

[25:03] He did the Obama White House. And by the way, that was your tax dollar at work. Not mine and the Kremlin Yes, that's right the Kremlin So the next time you go see Lenin's tomb or trot on the floor that Trotsky trotted on Think of expat Gringo's in Guatemala the three orphan brothers from New York who created a high-end International business from nothing and why did they come to Guatemala? My friend says is because they love the people they love the scenery and they love the weather that Altiplano I'm always talking about but that's not all this gentleman This friend of mine is also an internationally known artist and his brother is even more famous as an internationally known professional photographer but what do I know about art except to say that they exhibit and sell their stuff all over the world and

[25:53] People who order my friends custom carpets often commissioned him to do paintings to match the style color and texture of the carpets So, okay, you're thinking like me that here's a real Renaissance man Nicest guy in the world, but here's a point I have to drive home Here's one of the wealthiest most well-known people in Latin America married with four young kids Has no bodyguards drives a ten-year-old car and dresses down like long-term Expats are supposed to do he's a very low-key guy with his country gentleman estate Unpretentious and tucked away right next to his textile factory. Oh, and I forgot to tell you he has a coffee plantation, too And he invited us all to a little coffee and tea party at his house and gave us all a pound of his coffee

[26:43] from his own estate Where does he sell this coffee? Well, it turns out he doesn't sell his coffee at all What he does is he has it processed and packaged and he gives it away as gifts to his carpet clients What do you think not bad for a hippie backpacker without a plan at all wouldn't you say and by the way? He says hey Johnny. Why don't you come over next week for brunch? And then he said I'll invite our zoo Well, you know who our zoo is He was president of Guatemala in the 90s one of the lucky former presidents that hasn't been indicted for anything yet I said yet Oh and another thing the brothers set up a foundation for local Impoverished women and really we should all help the poor locals when we can even if it's just with some clothes or some food

[27:31] Or your old computer South of the border down Mexico way That's listening to the expat files living in Latin America Coming to you each week from somewhere south of the border and don't forget you can email me on anything at all about Latin America The expat files at gmail.com See you next time