Episode Summary
In this episode, Johnny Mueller addresses a listener's question about expat couples where one partner wants to leave the U.S. while the other does not. He discusses the common challenges faced by such couples, including resistance to the idea of moving, the difficulty of making the move without mutual agreement, and the potential for conflict or breakup if the move is not well-managed. Johnny also reflects on the importance of bonding and networking with other expats, as well as the concept of 'living the life of Riley' as a metaphor for a fulfilling expat lifestyle.
Johnny then discusses the common pitfalls expats face when moving to Latin America, particularly highlighting the experiences of those who come with a tourist mindset and later regret their decision. He emphasizes the importance of having the right attitude and being on the same page as a partner when moving. He also responds to a listener's email about the challenges of immigrating to Latin America, countering the perception that expats are not helping the region and pointing out the positive contributions expats make, such as improving local economies and cultures.
The episode continues with Johnny discussing the perception and reality of expats living in the suburbs of Latin America. He challenges the common stereotype that expats live in dangerous, crime-infested areas, instead highlighting that many expats opt for suburban areas that offer a balance of safety, convenience, and a chance for self-sufficiency. He also critiques the traditional Latin American oligarchs who maintain the status quo by keeping the working class underpaid and uneducated.
Johnny then shifts focus to the cultural and political dynamics in Latin America, particularly focusing on the reaction to Donald Trump's comments about Mexico and illegal immigration. He highlights how Trump's remarks have sparked widespread criticism and mockery across Latin American media and social platforms. The segment also touches on the broader theme of expats and locals in Latin America, discussing the impact of foreign influence and the tensions that arise from it.
Finally, Johnny discusses the role of immigrant labor in the United States, particularly in jobs that Americans often avoid, such as cleaning, gardening, and landscaping. He references the 1960s and 1970s, when illegal immigration was not a major issue, and questions who performed these jobs before the influx of immigrant labor. He shares a personal anecdote about his cleaning lady, who had a tooth extracted by a neighbor who is not a licensed dentist but provides affordable dental care to the poor. Johnny highlights the economic realities of the poor in Latin America, where basic medical procedures are prohibitively expensive, and how expats often support their domestic workers. He also warns against donating to charities and NGOs, arguing that most of the funds go to administrative costs rather than direct aid. He concludes by promoting Richard Martin's seminar in Penang, Malaysia, as an alternative for expats looking for opportunities outside of Latin America.
Topics
Expat couples, Moving to Latin America, Cultural references, Networking with expats, Challenges of expat life, Expatriate experiences in Latin America, Cultural and economic challenges of immigration, The role of expats in improving local communities, The importance of having the right mindset when moving abroad, Expats in Latin America, Suburban living in Latin America, Latin American oligarchs
Chapters
00:00:00 Opening 00:00:58 Dale's Dilemma: The Expat Couple Dilemma 00:03:59 The Dynamics of Expat Couples 00:06:06 The Consequences of Poor Planning in Expat Moves 00:06:09 The Pitfalls of Expatriation in Latin America 00:08:24 A Listener's Concern About Immigration to Latin America 00:12:07 The Stereotype of the Suburbs in Latin America 00:12:32 The Upscale Suburbs and Their Appeal to Expats 00:14:20 The Role of Traditional Oligarchs in Maintaining the Status Quo 00:17:49 Gringo Backlash in Specific Regions Like Costa Rica 00:18:00 Introduction to the Cultural Impact of Foreign Influence 00:18:51 Trump's Comments and Their Reactions in Latin America 00:20:44 Media and Social Media Reactions to Trump's Remarks 00:24:05 The Role of Immigrant Labor in the U.S. 00:25:39 Expats Supporting Domestic Workers 00:25:48 Warning Against Charity and NGO Donations 00:26:53 Expatriate Opportunities in Southeast Asia
Transcript
Automatically transcribed from the original recording; names and wording may contain errors.
[00:00] South of the border down Mexico way That's where I fell in love when the stars above came up to play and now I wonder Hello there all you expat wannabes. I'm Johnny Mueller and you're listening to the expat files living in Latin America The show that tells you just what it's like to live work play and or retire down here in Latin America It's a mix of the good the bad the ugly and the great and it's all right here. So let's get started Okay now here's an email that should hit home for a lot of you guys and gals out there and this one comes from a former expat wisdom Seminar attendee Dale who came down to my seminar with his wife around two years ago now a smart guy Who's doing the right thing voting with his feet? He says hey Johnny
[00:48] I bought a lot in Nicaragua and I'm building next year took me a lot longer than I planned But I appreciate your guidance and putting me on the right track one question though Do you have any cases where the wife or husband doesn't want to leave the first world doesn't want to go? If so, where do you go from there? What kind of decisions can be made? I'd love to hear you talk about that on your show Thanks, Captain Johnny. That would be copy done Johnny in espanol. Actually Dale. I'm no real copy done Jonah soy mighty nado Tom poco Let's see if any of you listeners get that reference and I say that because there's a real captain that actually does correspond with our show And with Richard Martin show, too That's Captain Mango now I get a lot of emails and I haven't read any of Captain Mango's on the air
[01:37] Richard Martin has on his wake-up call show I haven't read any of his on the show, but that's not for Captain Mango's lack of cynicism cleverness and wit He's got plenty of that and by the way good old Captain Mango's one of my expat wisdom seminar repeat offenders You know a lot of people come twice three times even four times to the seminar And you know a lot of people ask me why why do people come back more than once? Could it be because of my captivating magnetic personality or my bad jokes? Maybe not quite Turns out it's all about bonding and networking with all the cool and like-minded expats who come to these seminars as Well as the fact that they meet and hang with long-term very settled expats who came down
[02:22] Didn't expect much and are now living the life of Riley many doing so on a crummy Social security check and for those of you too young to know what the life of Riley is Well, there used to be a radio show in the 50s called life of Riley starring William Bendix Then in the late 50s it became a show on TV and guess who took over the radio part when William Bendix hit the tube none other than Jackie Gleason before he was famous with the honeymooners guess that shows my age, huh? Well, whatever you think I'm not that old because I'll tell you this in Chicago We had the super station WGN and it showed all those old 50s reruns over and over again So way back when in the 60s and 70s when there were only three networks in the country ABC NBC and CBS
[03:10] Chicago had WGN playing all the reruns so I got thoroughly doused with them as a kid So anyway, that's what happens to so many fresh and long-term expats when they get down here They end up living the proverbial life of Riley Meaning what well in the radio and TV show Riley was the clueless head of a middle-class household whose blunders and Misadventures always ended in a very happy result and that's exactly what happened to me and the vast majority of expats who come down And stick with the plan the plan being become an expat as far off the gringo tourist trail as you can So back to Dale's dilemma one half of a couple up north wants to leave the US in a big way and the other Wants to stay you know what Dale that seems to be problem number one when we're talking about couples up in the states
[03:59] Seems like in almost every case. There's one person who first decides. Hey, we gotta go They see the writing on the wall how things are deteriorating up there Then they do their damnedest to get their significant other up to speed and on board So how well does that work? The success of that method varies all over the place That means many times one person has the bug and the other person says okay I like to travel and goes along for the ride However, the wheel and the driving force to leave and to vote with your feet is almost never equal in both persons Worse yet many times one of the pair will be quite resistant to the idea No matter what the reality or how persuasive the arguments are to go one of the two just doesn't want to do it though
[04:47] That person might play along thinking their other half will get over it and they'll be back in Cleveland by next year Then there's always that pair where one in the couple will put his foot down and say nope I'm not going and you're not either and we all know the excuses family friends job Kids in school rotary church poker night a a golfing tennis club bowling team There are you know a million excuses That's why and I've seen this quite a few times when a very willing driven partner brings his unwilling better half down You can almost bet it'll end up being a mess. Yes. I've seen it myself You have one very happy camber and a chronic complainer. So how's that gonna work in a household one person?
[05:32] Absolutely delighted with the move and the other Complaining about everything the bugs and neighbors the traffic the roads the service the food the booze the cleaning ladies gold teeth The maintenance guys be oh it's something there's no magic here for and very difficult to work out Especially that BO thing. So yes over the years. I've seen husband and wife and couples come down Starting out on the expat life, but alas it didn't work out Most often the situation becomes so untenable in the household that one or both of them go back And if one goes back you guessed it It's usually a permanent breakup and by the way I see that happened most often with people who come down here with very little boots on the ground Usually with people who've been to Panama Costa Rica or Cancun a couple of times even
[06:18] Who think they know by doing a couple of tourist trail trips like that that they're kind of the expert now So take a tip from people who know what's happening in Costa Rica right now We'll use that as an example since so many clueless gringos up north who've never really been anywhere Think it's a golden retirement paradise And this part is true seems like practically everyone who first goes to Costa Rica is absolutely in love with the place Then they may go back once or twice as they make their plans to finally move there or retire Then once settled in their totally gringo wise community After about a year the very same people that were ecstatic and delighted with the place at first are saying things like Sylvia I think we made a big mistake and Sylvia who was kind of talked into it by her husband. She says Harry, you know
[07:07] I did not want to leave Cleveland in the first place I should have never gotten you that international living subscription for Christmas. I could kick myself for that instead. I'll kick you Well, here's another nice mess you've got me into you tell them all II and of course It's not just on the tourist trail where that happens I've seen it happen plenty of times off the gringo tourist trail, too You've got that one very happy camper in the household and the other one well critical negative and on skype all the time to the Folks back home even the ones they hate and believe me. There's just no cure for that It's not enough to say you have to come down here with the right attitude If you're gonna come down as a couple you have to come down with a person who's on the same page as you are So then what do you do if you're not on the same page?
[07:52] Well, I wish there was a cure for it and there is you know A partial cure at least a kind of a test get some real boots on the ground off the gringo tourist trail You can do that yourself Investigate make a plan wander around a bit or you can do the fast track and pack about two to five years of expat Know-how by coming down to one of my expat wisdom seminars this next one I'm having in and around guadamala starts July 11th There's still time to get in just go to expat wisdom calm click on the Latin seminar link and check it out All right, that's it. Here's another interesting email. It starts out Oh la Senor Mueller since I initially contacted you sometime back you touched upon Latin America's caste system in your podcasts Unfortunately, I can barely keep a roof over my head
[08:40] So immigrating to Latin America might be a challenge for me However, if I were fortunate enough I would be somewhat loathe to immigrate because it's a third world region in the past I traveled to a third world country or two It's highly disconcerting because you can witness a pronounced chasm between wealth and poverty Metaphorically speaking I see it as a mansion ensconced in a drug infested crime-laden neighborhood I'm no anthropologist or sociologist, but as in most undeveloped societies Latin America suffers from high illiteracy and corruption From listening to your podcast It seems the expatriates and European elements in Latin America aren't doing anything to bring up or ameliorate Latin America
[09:25] Perhaps this is my cynicism speaking But I venture to say the aforementioned are trying to maintain the status quo Moreover such might create a powder keg throughout Latin America sooner or later We learned that from modern-day South Africa is my perspective shared by expatriates and others in your neck of the woods or what? Finally over the years. I've heard mixed feedback on Brazil to my knowledge. It is Latin Americans Balkanized melting pot. Could you do a few podcasts about Brazil signed? Well, he didn't sign it however I can tell by the stilted pros and the way he spelled neighborhood with an ou instead of an o that he's definitely a Brit a Brit who obviously hasn't listened to too many of my now nearly 500 podcasts because I've done quite a few on Brazil
[10:14] I've also spoken quite a lot about how expats at least a lot of them I know help poor and needy Latin individuals personally one-on-one For example, I know personally some long-term expats that are sending their cleaning ladies kids to private schools How do you like that? And I know dozens and dozens of expats with businesses who of course have hired many hundreds of locals They pay more than they have to treat them better and much more fairly than Latin bosses do not to mention There's that added effect that they're instilling a first world work ethic and sense of cutthroat capitalism. Just kidding I meant customer service that never existed before in the Latin culture and as far as his metaphor
[11:01] Latin America being a mansion ensconced in a drug infested crime-laden neighborhood It's obvious. He hasn't been to Latin America in the last five or so years Because like I said in so many shows now Every Latin City big and small has districts and regions of first world prosperity where you wouldn't know you weren't in nicer areas of Cleveland or Seattle for the fact that Everyone's a little bit shorter and browner and they all speak Spanish So as for a mansion in a sea of chaos and crime that my friend is what under educated Latins do when those US dollar remisses start flowing in from their illegal relatives in the states The poor folks and the under educated folks with money really do build mansions in a sea of chaos and crime
[11:49] Why because it's the old neighborhood and they want to impress the folks that they are now kings and queens of the dung heap But smarter latins and university educated latins who come into money They like upwardly mobile people in the first world create their own version of the burbs So as much as the word burbs sets up a kind of cookie cutter McMansion Lemming mentality in your brain and as much as you might disdain the thought of living there Remember lag time is the name of the game down here The nice peaceful wide open spaces of the burbs have become kind of calm and gentrified escape routes For so many latins who used to live in the crowded often dangerous areas of the big city And let me tell you the burbs that surround most big cities in latin america can be spectacular little cities in themselves
[12:40] Now when I say upscale, I mean solidly middle class by first world standards though There are literally thousands of burbs and neighborhoods that are really upscale with million dollar McMansions Always just a stone throw away from an upscale mall or shopping center Now if all that sounds too plastic and gosh for you I mean I know what people's minds conjure up when they hear the words the burbs They're thinking fake early american tutor in gothic McMansions. In fact, I can see you all wincing right now However, many many expats who reject that sort of thing end up buying or renting a choice piece of land in and around the burbs usually Far enough away so that they don't have to look out the window and stare at some big development yet close enough To have access to all the stores and conveniences like for example walmart sears ace hardware in costco
[13:30] I know I know you're wincing at that too, but hey, you can't fight those guys. They're everywhere So anyway, a lot of long-term expats I know end up moving to the burbs at first and then they Get their own little plot of land or house or little homestead and they start planting things fruit trees avocados Trying to get self-sufficient and even off the grid or have a mind to get off the grid So when you think of expats going to latin america as people who live in mansions ensconced and drug infested crime laden neighborhoods Well, it's not expats who do that It's clueless latins who come into some easy money And by the way, it's not gringos and expats who want to maintain the status quo Sure, we benefit by it But there's so few of us that we can't really change it
[14:16] Turns out the people who are actually trying to keep the middle classes and the lower middle classes Uneducated and underpaid are the traditional latin oligarchs that own the cement companies the beer companies the coffee and sugar plantations You know the traditional giant landowners that have been around for hundreds of years They're rich because their average workers make about 12 bucks a day So you better believe they and the politicians they own want to keep it that way no matter what lip service they give to the contrary Which is why at voting time politicians give away happy meals and t-shirts to the unwashed voting masses instead of free books for their kids to read Which is why by the way, there are very very few public libraries throughout latin america And the ones that exist have just a few rows of dilapidated old molding books and you can't even check them out
[15:05] You have to read them there And finally as to the question might there be a powder keg brewing in latin america against gringos and expats? Come on, it's not that funny in a word No In fact you just go to the two places in latin america where everybody believes everybody up in the first world That is that gringos are despised that would be cuba and venezuela Of course over the years the governments have tried to turn the people against the gringos And they've mostly succeeded in the fact that cubans and venezuelans hate the us government I mean who doesn't right, but they just love gringos So then how do you explain that well because of the fact that those countries are off the gringo tourist trail by light years
[15:54] gringos and first world expats are absolute rarities and believe it or not everyone and I mean everyone wants to be your friend Again, it's all about the fact that in their wildest dreams and fantasies They want to be just like the screwed up and distorted people they see on us cable tv e entertainment friends married with children two and a half four skins They all get those programs dubbed in spanish on satellite tv and that picture of american life No matter how decadent and twisted it is cell phones designer clothes eating out at restaurants every night That lifestyle remains very very appealing to a population that mostly goes to bed at night hungry So then all these twisted demanded americans on tv have everything they don't a house a car a pool
[16:41] Air-conditioning a room full of exercise machines. No one uses dishwashers humidifiers dehumidifiers trash compactors and jacuzzis and 300-dollar queasy narts So can you blame these poor latins for thinking that every gringo they meet has the golden touch? Oh, and by the way once when I was at a party, I got into a discussion about of all things Dehumidifiers and humidifiers my advice stay away from those two topics No matter how you try to explain those concepts to them, even if your spanish is terrific 99.9 percent of all latins just can't understand why a gringo would buy something for a couple hundred bucks that took the humidity out of there And then at the same time have another 300-dollar apparatus that pumps humidity into the air
[17:26] No wonder they're always saying those crazy gringos So unless you're in a high-volume gringo tourist area You can expect just about zero gringo backlash no matter what happens in the world And like I mentioned in the past show when you have gringo infested areas like costa rica Yep, it's only natural that the natives are restless and the gringos are getting on their nerves So it is true There is some gringo backlash occurring especially in places like costa rica In fact now that they've milked pretty much all the gringos who've set up shop there They feel it's time to kick them out and do things for themselves Now that the gringos have taught them customer service promptness food hygiene how to put toilet paper in the toilet and of course cutthroat capitalism Not to mention all those first world buildings and infrastructure
[18:13] So is it bite the hand that feeds you in costa rica? It is you bet though. It is human nature I mean, come on What it would happen if all of a sudden your neighborhood was invaded by let's say tens of thousands of canadians And all they did was run around in funny checked flannel shirts and wilderness clothes building ice rinks everywhere Talking of nothing but hockey and moose hunting Wouldn't you eventually get sick of all that and want to kick him out of the neighborhood minus the ice rinks, of course That said here's something that's been cracking us all up as gringos and expats for the last week or so You know that donald trump's uh gonna run for president, right? Well, you wouldn't believe he's all over the news down here There's talk about him on all the panel shows. There's tweets and twitters that are just ripping the guy apart
[19:04] Why because he said what needed to be said he probably heard this He said quote mexico is not our friend and he said when mexico sends its illegal immigrants to us They're not sending us the best They're sending us people who have nothing to lose people who take drugs people who are criminals and rapists Here's what you didn't know on all these mexican and latin american tv shows these panel shows and these talk shows Even the news they have latin people commenting saying things like well trump has hundreds of properties And he's making millions if not billions of dollars in rents on them and guess who worked on all of them latin immigrants They built those magnificent buildings and trump's a hypocrite So say all the latin news hosts and op-ed pieces etc. And then you've got hosts down here saying look
[19:55] Remember last year's oscars when mexican director alejandro gonzalez won the oscar for best picture and best director latin's also won oscars for the best screenplay and photography To which trump answered on tv in a fox interview. He said yeah, it was a big night for mexico Which just proves that everything that goes down in the entertainment media in this country is Ridiculous, and then trump said if I win we're not doing business with mexico In fact, I want a very large lawsuit in mexico's corrupt court system, but I can't collect We won't do business with mexico Then he said get this because redolfo roses moya owes me a hell of a lot of money Mexico will never again host a miss universe pageant
[20:44] Now all this stuff has been translated and hit the media down here like a sledgehammer You should see the tweets that they're showing on latin american tv every night ramming this guy for example Here's one and i'll translate it for you. It's a tweet It says we should organize all of our minority groups that are in the united states and boycott every trump Industry and every trump building to show this guy how much power us millions of immigrants have Oh, and by the way expat eddy says illegal latin immigrants can't organize themselves enough to clean up their own front yards And listen to this tweet. It says this trump guy is one of the richest men in the world Why does he need the money from a lawsuit in mexico?
[21:30] Now come on, isn't that the lamest excuse you've ever heard just because he's got a lot of money He's supposed to let someone in mexico rip him off, right? How about this tweet against the guy and this one really makes me laugh It says apparently trump doesn't know how to read or doesn't do his homework if he did He'd know that all of the latin immigrants to the us without exception Are there not only to help raise their standard of living but improve and lift up america too They're doing dignified work that lazy americans don't want to do And one guy wrote remember these tweets are being shown on television. It says Haha, please Let this guy put up a big wall. That won't stop me and my friends. We'll still get through. Oh, and here's one
[22:16] It says he's the new hitler. He's the anti christ And talk about macho. Can you believe they're putting stuff like this on tv? Listen to this tweet. It says donald trump has the hair in the face of a homosexual The truth is latin immigrants like us We're just really heroes who've temporarily abandoned our home countries Then he says with the intelligence of a fruit fly. We have dignity respect us. We are not homos I'm not kidding you they show this stuff down here in the news and in the media. How about this tweet? What are you talking about? It's not your land. You stole it from the indians We have just as much right to be there as you do Not to mention half of the us was once spanish and latin territory and you stole it from us
[23:04] And finally one latin guy says if this is the future of north america if they elect a jerk like this I'm leaving and i'm taking my 11 kids with me. We're going get this to canada Let me tell you nobody, but nobody down here is defending that guy or even giving him half the benefit of the doubt And some of these tweets are even saying that if he becomes president, don't worry. He'll soon be assassinated Like one tweet said after all the us is 16 percent latin american And if this guy gets in they'll all be pissed off Okay, so i'm just putting that out there for you because this is the expat files living in latin america And if you're living down here and know the spanish language You'll occasionally read the papers and turn on tv and this week. Anyway, that's what you'd be seeing
[23:52] Oh, and by the way whenever i get into a discussion down here with a latin about illegal immigration to the states It seems like the only defensive leg they've got to stand on is that they do jobs that americans don't want to do You know clean toilets windows gardening landscaping dumpster technology to which I say Back in the 60s and 70s when I was growing up when illegal immigration was hardly a problem and no one was really talking about it Who do you think did those jobs before? The tooth fairy when I use that comeback, I always get a big pregnant pause afterward Okay, switching gears a bit here quite a lot Actually the other day my cleaning lady told me that she couldn't come in because she was having a tooth extracted a molar And when she came back to work a couple days later, I said how to go. She said fine
[24:39] I said who's your dentist? She said well, she's not a dentist. She's my neighbor lady I said what your neighbor lady turns out in the poor and very poor sections of latin america In all the little neighborhoods. Remember. I told you there's a lady who does incantations and fortunes and she's kind of the Which is which anyway in this little poor neighborhood where my cleaning lady comes from There's such a lady and she does dentistry too Or some certain procedures. Anyway, and why don't the poor and the very poor go to a regular dentist? Well, that's because like my cleaning lady said it costs about three or four dollars to get a tooth pulled at this lady's place Or you can go to a real dentist and get one pulled for maybe 15 or 20 bucks Or she said you could do like her father did and one by one when his teeth went bad. He pulled them out himself. Oh
[25:33] And who said tequila wasn't medicinal That is the truth and how the poor and very poor people live down here Which is why again so many gringos and expats help out their cleaning ladies and maintenance guys and their families etc Again, I can't stress enough That you should never give a dime to one of these charities NGOs or even church organizations Don't get sucked into that trap by their slick propaganda You know starving kids with their rib cages popping through flies landing on their faces Remember usually 60 to 80 percent of the dough that's donated goes to quote administrative costs That means six and seven figure salaries Not to mention first class air travel to world poverty seminars to god-forsaken places like kang koon in hawaii
[26:23] And speaking of seminars that actually provide a very valuable service Richard martin is having his own seminar in southeast asia in august So check out richard martin's shows by going to richard martin's wake-up call Dot podbean dot com So he's offering a seminar on the other side of the world in panang malaysia That's p-e-n-a-n-g. Look it up. That city's been called one of the top three retirement destinations in the world again It's one of those few places on earth You can live like a first world person on a third world budget and the other big advantage everyone speaks english So if you'd like the chance to get your boots on the ground in panang southeast asia with richard martin holding your hand all the way Just give him a call at 702
[27:10] 609 996 to His seminars from august 23rd through 28. So call him or drop him an email. That's rm at Gfawd.com So if you're not quite set on expatting to latin america and you're still looking around for options I'd highly recommend richard martin's seminar in panang South of the border You've been listening to the expat files living in latin america coming to you twice a week from somewhere south of the border Email me the expat files at gmail.com And don't forget to check out expat wisdom.com to sign up for your free reports on latin america See you next time nos vemos