#517 – The Expat Files: Gringo Tourism, Mental Health, and Medical Tourism in Latin America

Automatically transcribed from the original recording; names and wording may contain errors.

[00:00] South of the border down Mexico way That's where I fell in love when the stars above came up to play and now I wonder Hello there all you expat wannabes. I'm Johnny Mueller and you're listening to the expat files living in Latin America The show that tells you just what it's like to live work play and or retire down here in Latin America It's a mix of the good the bad the ugly and the great and it's all right here. So let's get started You know, there's some things you just hate to see come to Latin America Like for example, I'm looking at a typical gringo English language tourist magazine that you see in all the gringoized areas in Latin America In fact, you can tell by the number of English language rags that exist in a town or city or whatever

[00:50] Just how deeply you are or aren't on the gringo tourist trail First of all, let's say you're in the Lake Atitlan district and Guatemala sure It's kind of on the rustic backpacker style tourist trail You could say but not by any stretch of the imagination like the tourist trail in Cancun Costa Rica or Panama So when someone says oh that town's touristy in a country like Guatemala Honduras Salvador or Paraguay Let's say places that are normally completely out of the question as first world tourist vacation spots That's that when you're talking about a touristy destination in a place like Guatemala or Honduras You have to redefine your definition of tourism So in fact, you really can't judge the level of a gringo tourism by English language monthly or weekly or daily publications

[01:36] Floating around said areas for example in that Lake Atitlan region in Guatemala You know the one I mentioned in a show a long time ago where I ran into Mel Gibson Sylvester Stallone and Jimmy Page not together all on separate visits anyway get this They've got one only one little English language publication and believe me it's on cheap paper Not glossy or any color But it gets the job done and it's free and that little English rag serves all 12 little villages around that lake So of course what you have is the gringo owned joints advertising in it So that's where you find it in those bars hotels and restaurants So for those laid-back backpacker tourists, that's the only rag you can refer to that's in English now Let's contrast that to a place like San Jose, Costa Rica last time

[02:24] I was there there were no less than 25 different English rags of one sort or another floating around that city of about 400,000 some monthlies some weeklies some dailies the most famous one being the Tico times And who do you think owns rights for and publishes these things? Entrepreneurial gringo expats, of course Which is why you can instantly tell how much the place has been infiltrated and saturated with gringos Simply by checking out the number and variety of English rags Racked and stacked haphazardly at the checkout counter in the tienda which brings me to the point I started off with things us long-term expats Just hate to see that make their way down from the neurotic first world We thought we left all that behind but alas as the gringos come they bring their baggage with them

[03:10] And you know in the old days 10 or 15 years ago you used to hear gringos and expats complaining, you know It's nice down here, but I don't have this and I don't have that There's no place to buy my favorite hiking boots or my favorite nail polish or conditioner No place to buy Halloween costumes can't find a good treadmill Cuisinart pasta maker, whatever. Yeah, that's right back then 10 15 years ago There was a very limited choice and there was no Amazon to order from but now with Walmart Costco Sears Ace Hardware, etc You can get almost anything and if you can't you can order from Amazon and have it shipped in three days Now don't think I'm digressing here as usual sounds like it, but I'm not I'm looking at this gringo publication right now That comes out of Ecuador. It's a monthly perfect example of the glossy tourist rags

[03:55] You're starting to see pop up everywhere in tourist districts And here's just the first thing that bugs the crap out of me and other long-term expats I'm looking in the back in the classified section under health services and remember this is all in English Check this ad out. Are you worried about your mental health? Do you have anxiety? Addictions depression panic attacks insomnia relationship problems dysfunctional friends or family visit our medical psychiatric and Psychotherapeutic clinic we have three resident psychotherapists one of them trained and guess where my jammy Then of course it has the address and the names and the phone numbers and all the relevant details Now I guess because I've been down here so long I just hate to see when this kind of stuff lands here in Latin America

[04:43] Basically, it seems like they're advertising here to troubled gringos who brought their anxieties and neuroses down here with them So then you might ask why do they still carry that first world burden when they're coming down here to live the good life Calm tranquil off the treadmill relatively stress-free and all that I mean, let's face it some of the main reasons gringos and expats come down is because they want to get rid of their anxiety Their depression their addictions their money tax and relationship problems, etc So you think there would be little need for a full-service psychiatric clinics like that, right? But they've started to arrive. So why are they here? Have you guessed? Well, that's because in gringo saturated areas All you're hanging around with doing business and socializing with our other gringos with you guessed

[05:31] It similar baggage and like finds like wherever you are, right? So how are you gonna offload your stress if you're hanging around with a bunch of other stressed out types? Oh But I'm not gonna go into a rant on that other than to advise all you expect gonna be some wannabes that when you come Down here try not to set up your new life headquarters in a place that's saturated with gringos Oh, you're just gonna have the same problems. You thought you were escaping from not only that You'll never learn your Spanish correctly Believe me, you really do need some breathing space so you can be near our gringo tourist area But not too near to become immersed in and dependent on it Oh, and here's another ad in this little glossy tourist reg. It says dr. Henry Guzman

[06:16] Counseling for adolescents and adults. Do you have relationship problems substance abuse full trauma and recovery programs for adolescents operated by a u.s. License child Psychotherapist. Yeah, right. You can see where I'm going with this. Let's put all those little gringo kids down here on Ritalin, too Now you should know that just like so many of my gringo English teacher friends who work at those helicopter schools They say it's those entitled children of the wealthy that go to those schools that have the same Psychologic problems those addictions and abuses that first world kids are noted for so yes wealthy Latin kids are achieving those gringo wannabe Psychiatric problems too and it's the other 95% of Latin kids the ones that go to crappy public schools and non helicopter cheap private schools

[07:06] They turn out to be the nicest most well-balanced level-headed kids and as for autism Disruptive behavior in Ritalin well in that class of kids practically Non-existent as one expat English teacher friend of mine claims the more expensive the private helicopter school The more detached the parents are from their kids whose proxy families consist of cleaning ladies maids nannies and bodyguards So there's no wonder why they develop first world quirks and psychological problems But back to this glossy english magazine from Ecuador Would it surprise you to know that they've got alcoholics anonymous groups strictly for gringos? How'd that happen? That's because a lot of gringos living in the beach towns, especially end up being case a day beer drinkers Oh, and how about this classified ad they've got their local gringo rotary club meetings and get this number

[07:57] 4726 masonic lodges having a meeting next week And of course, we have the most mind-numbing and idiotic gringo classified ads of all Republicans abroad and democrats abroad I mean, come on Isn't that why you packed up and left the obama nation in the first place to get away from all that crap? Is it really in your best interest to come all this way? Just to get lobotomized for a second time again My advice never live too close to the gringo tourist trail or you'll be sorry I know a lot of gringos who stuck on the gringo tourist trail and now they're on that same old treadmill Albeit in a different way and as for democrats and republicans abroad My question always is you're down here now in the real land of the free and you want to cast an absentee ballot for another

[08:43] egomaniacal sociopath I don't get it The object of smart astute expats is to have a lower profile and a smaller footprint as crazy as this might sound It's one last chance to hit your life reset button It's one way to start from scratch and pretty much get off the radar But it's not gonna happen if you join up with democrats or republicans abroad Please just the thought of it makes me wanna o vomit Speaking of brain dead I ran into an expat gringo the other day who said he and his wife were on their way to the doctor to get a flu shot And by the way being off the gringo tourist trail the doctor had to special order it for him and his family Which makes a pretty good case for the expat walking dead, doesn't it? But he did have an excuse

[09:29] He did have plausible denial. He came down to latin america many years ago Not because he wanted to escape big brotherland of his own free will but because he got transferred down here As a promotion in a transnational corporation. You might have heard of him. They're a brain and health food corporation known as Coca-cola So his reasons for moving down here were neither motivational intellectual or life enhancing. They were strictly monetary Okay, that said now as you probably know, I get a lot of emails and occasionally I get emails from people dissing me Calling me names or being outright aggressive and that's all right, too It's all part of doing a show like this Anyway, I do get negative emails on occasion why they keep listening I don't know, but it seems they keep on keeping on. I mean why listen to me. Why not turn on the tube?

[10:16] There's always the kardashians dancing with the stars. And what's that other one? Everybody likes america's got dickheads something like that Anyway, as you know, i'm affiliated with john gault's website The new expat.com now note that john gault at that website does get various emails that reference my show Like for example this one from mary. We won't use her last name. She says dear. Mr. Gault Many of us expats voted for and support president obama It is offensive that these supposedly informative webcasts always include obama bashing So there it is short and sweet. She's irritated and bothered to write about it. By the way, mary How is obama care working for you got that $5,000 deductible stash in a shoe box somewhere? Hope you do

[11:03] So yes, john gault does field comments like that on the new expat.com website So here's what he wrote back to mary starting out as the nice guy he is with a compliment He says mary. Thanks for your input But don't expect changes. The radio show host does not subscribe to the theory that Number one war is peace. Number two freedom is slavery. Number three ignorance is strength Then he adds this site and its brother sites are not connected nor do they adhere to news speak You might find this offensive mary, but there is no ministry of love here For interrogation or brainwashing nor a ministry of truth to enforce thought crime To perpetuate propaganda and historical revision nor a minister of plenty

[11:52] Which handles shortages and rationing nor a ministry of peace which oversees war and atrocity Then mr Gault says, you know, there are many other sites available for inner and outer party members like democrats abroad Yep, there it is the d word again raising its ugly collective head, huh? But it just as well could have been republicans abroad or star wars fans abroad or crack heads abroad Anyway, mr Gault goes on to say to mary the views of the radio show the expat files living in latin america Are observations of truth primarily meant to be dealt out to new expats expat gonabes and wannabes And finally, mr Gault says I invite you to find your own sites that provide you with the quote information you want to hear and lastly

[12:40] From your comment. It seems you are an expat So why then for you is it more appealing to live down here than obama land? That confuses me. So that was his reply to mary. Hey, he's not john gault for nothing, you know Well, and by the way for those of you coming down to my january latin insider seminar John gault himself will be giving a pre and post seminar trip slash boots on the ground tour To the most beautiful lake in the world like atiland guadamala And yes, I know it sounds like a cliche the most beautiful lake in the world And your uncle bernie in minnesota fishes in the most beautiful lake in the world, right? Well when you're looking at lake atitlan, it's kind of like a lost world and you don't have to be on hyahuasca either For one thing it's about 6 000 feet above sea level and was formed by the eruption of three volcanoes

[13:31] So so while you're sitting there admiring the lake sucking down a tequila kuba libra or a cojiva You're seeing three nearby volcanoes staring right back at you. Yeah, I know I know a picture is worth a thousand words And though that's a big cliche too I urge all you guys and gals coming down to take a couple extra days either before or after the seminar And sign on for one of those extra four day lake atitlan trips with john gault himself Then and only then will you find out that age-old question? Who is john gault and speaking of the seminar? I do have a few spots left So go to www the new expat.com and click on johnny's 2016 latin seminar link for full details And if you do sign up don't forget to add four days at the front or the back end of the seminar

[14:17] So you can do that trip with john gault In fact, there is a good chance that i'll be personally tagging along on john gault's four-day trip after the seminar He says he's got some new discoveries. He wants me to check out personally. I think I will Now let me read a part of an email that I just got from one of the persons that's already signed up for this coming seminar He says dear johnny Yes about john gault's two trips to lake atitlan. I will do at least one possibly both of them But johnny, I forgot to ask you about the local dentists in that area I need to have some dental work done big stuff bridge work, etc Could there be a dentist or two that would come highly recommended by you? And would the cost generally be significantly lower in the states if so

[15:03] I'll call there and get prices assuming they speak english. My spanish is non-existent, you know, but i'm a fast learner Don't have dental insurance up here myself. Just the dental select discount plan, which is still pretty pricey Then he finishes off by saying johnny besides all the valuable info you offer I tend to laugh out loud when listening to your shows, which unfortunately I rarely feel inspired to do spontaneously in my day-to-day life here in cleveland Hmm could it be another clevelandite? Well good, especially since cleveland gets a lot of mention on this show So he says thanks a lot for all that as well. See you at the seminar Now you might ask why did I read that email because every single seminar that i've given so far

[15:49] Has had at least one attendee Contacting me about first world dentistry at third world prices and hopefully being able to fit that in on their trip down Now I don't know about you listeners up there But it seems like after you hit about 35 or 40 years old people start thinking a lot about dental plans because well It's true There are only two things in your body that don't automatically repair themselves when damaged or injured That would be your teeth and your hair But unfortunately even in hollywood, I don't think they have hair insurance Though I could be wrong and I know for a fact if you don't have dental insurance up in the states Anyway, it's something you put off and you put off until well things get pretty bad So let me give you my response to that email And I bring this up because I get so many emails from people asking about medical tourism in latin america

[16:40] They've heard all these great things how cheap it is first world and all that But they've also heard the bad things, you know the mistakes the guys that weren't properly licensed and well, you know All the horror stories on 2020 So let me just say that before you go searching the net for various Medical tourism sites and hook up with those guys and before you go paying their prices Which though much cheaper than up in the states still will be 30 to 50 percent more than if you Contacted that dentist or physician yourself without going through that so-called medical tourism middleman Then again, if you're living up in the first world And need a hell of a lot of work done and you find out it costs thousands and thousands of dollars to get let's say implants If you decide on the medical tourism route

[17:25] If you don't call one of those agencies and you decide to do it on your own Then when you finally make it down to latin america, who can you trust you throw a dart at the yellow pages? You don't want to do that Anyway, if we you expect gonna bees and wannabes and people coming down to the seminar believe me after being down here a couple of decades Now I know just the right people to go through the specialists that have trained in the u.s The ones that do first world quality work all the way and practice in first world style clinics and hospitals So anyway to answer that email basically I said depending on how many extra days you spend down here when you come down to the seminar My 100 bilingual seminar coordinator will hook you up with our most highly recommended dentist who speaks perfect english He graduated from us dental schools and a us certified oral surgeon too

[18:15] So the credentials don't get any better than that And by the way in the u.s When he graduated from his oral surgery fellowship they offered him a position as a teaching professor at the dental college He turned it down to come back to central america. Why because his whole family lives down here Anyway, that's how it goes with many specialists You meet down here in latin america that were trained up in the states In fact 95 percent or more of them come back to their home country because they can't stay in the states Due to the fact that they were up there on a student visa It's part of the deal that they get their training in the u.s And move back down to their home country and practice first world methods there So our recommendations are first world in every respect and they charge about one quarter or less of your average first world prices

[19:00] For example, one of my seminar attendees just was quoted 1500 for an implant then up in the states the very same ones using the very same materials cost five to six grand And by the way If you come down to the seminar and want to have a consult with a specialist or dentist and take advantage of the situation You have to schedule some more days onto your trip best thing to do come a few days early So my seminar coordinator can arrange appointments at the specialist or dentist whatever So believe it or not if your flight arrives in the morning You can have your first appointment and consult that day That way you can get started right away and have your appointments scheduled accordingly Now imagine just coming down and trying to do that for yourself Sure, you might find doctors and dentists that speak english But if you don't know spanish to talk to the receptionist you'll spend a lot of time spinning your wheels

[19:50] Sure, the doctors speak english, but most receptionists don't what if there's a waiting list and there are no appointments for quite a few days Which is why my seminar crew provides that service because a lot of people do end up coming down here Having that in the back of their mind getting some dental or medical work done elective surgery, whatever That said if you're ever wondering about medical tourism down here, we've certainly got the contacts So once again a number of our past seminar attendees have gone through that very same drill I know I know pretty crummy pun, huh? And believe me if you're having big work done like implants or bridges You can literally save tens of thousands of dollars. So then you're probably thinking johnny. Do you make money off of this? Are you getting a kickback or commission? Absolutely not, but i'll tell you this recently just in the last few months when I sent my gardener

[20:41] maintenance man to my dentist and told him to fix all his teeth and replace the four missing ones he had in front My dentist said don't worry johnny. I'll take care of it. How about that? So that was my payback and it was fine with me and by the way My maintenance guy had at least 10 long appointments with the dentist. That's how bad his teeth were So again, i'm not taking that 30 commission that these medical tourism people get i'm taking nothing. Oh, and by the way Nearly every one of my seminar attendees who've gone the medical or dental route down here They say that what they've saved actually covered some or all of their seminar cost and flight Okay, now changing gears a bit I get emails like this too Dear johnny, can you tell me the best central american town that's close to the beach safe

[21:31] Business friendly with good internet and a gringo advantage Thanks, johnny signed dennis. Well dennis Let's see. I can name probably about 50 towns and villages and cities that fit that description Now the thing is dennis if you want to hone in on one particular city or area That will suit your needs pretty much exactly To do that. First of all, you have to completely describe yourself your age your health your hobbies your likes your dislikes Your financial situation family life connections. Are you social? Do you want to make friends? Are you a loner a hermit a naturalist a homebody? Do you like fishing water sports tv sports? How anonymous do you want to be? Do you want a small footprint? Does that even matter to you?

[22:17] Do you want to have land? Do you want to rent an apartment you want to buy you want to build? So dennis says you can see it's almost impossible to hone in on a particular city town or village Unless and believe me, this is not a plug You hook up with me for a personal phone or skype consult That way we can spend a half an hour an hour going over your situation completely because you'll send me all that stuff Ahead of time all the things on the list. I just mentioned And we'll be able to find a half a dozen places at least that you should investigate and then You have to come down and get boots on the ground and hit every one of those town's villages or cities And decide which one is best for you So not to do the tough love thing here, but that's just the way it breaks down In fact, let me tell you a little story

[23:02] There was a gringo couple from the states Fortyish that sold the business up there and wanted to come down to latin america based On all the crap and bureaucracy they had to go through up in the states with their business They were sick and tired of it and they'd caught my podcast early on and they decided they're going to move to latin america What I found out later was he didn't want to spend the money and come down to the seminar with his wife So they did a grand total of two half hour phone consults with me Now I advised him right up front not to send a container down I advised him to sell everything and buy down here. What do they do? They sent a container down Then I advised him not to ship their car down What did they do ship their car down because his wife loved that car And yes They had loads of red tape and trouble with the bureaucracy getting all that stuff through getting their car licensed and cheered and all that because

[23:52] Well, they didn't speak spanish for one thing So right off the bat, they wanted to do what they wanted to do and they weren't listening to my advice Especially about the big important stuff then because they were successful small business owners up in the states They came down and said hey Well open a business and guess what they did they opened up a bar and it would have been a very very Successful bar if they would have put some boots on the ground before they opened it and listened to some sage advice Had they selected a spot just one measly block over from where they put it They would have kicked ass because the street over was a walking avenue. No cars allowed completely pedestrian I mean very heavy traffic on foot Therefore every business on that 10 block strip makes money

[24:37] But instead they chose one block away where no one dares to walk at night However on that busy pedestrian street one block away, it's always busy nice and safe So they're on a street one block away with car traffic Not much foot traffic though, and it is a bit dodgy at night However, like I said the busy pedestrian street loaded with happy partiers and all the bars and restaurants they're doing great So then why didn't this guy see that? Well, he just might have but he wanted very cheap rent So instead of paying 100 or 200 more bucks a month to be on the main pedestrian drag He settled for a better rent deal a block over where his place simply withered and died It never took off now note. We're talking about a district. That's way off the gringo tourist trail where rents are

[25:24] ridiculously cheap anyway I mean, come on i'm frugal too, but there's such a thing as so tight that you squeak So in the end this couple made many large errors in their path to becoming expats number one though They had plenty of money. They never came down to the seminar They just decided to do it on the strength of a couple of phone calls How's that and even then they didn't listen to some very valuable advice However, they're not the only ones. In fact, I often run into seminar attendees that have moved down here to latin america And guess what? I see him eating street food and getting sick And that's one of the first things I advise when you get down. Do not eat the street food Do not drink anything out of a glass always out of a bottle or a can No ice cubes unless you make them and keep away from raw salads unless you make them yourself

[26:12] Now, of course, if you go to a four star or first world hotel or restaurant it's a different story because well They're paying attention to first world sanitation and hygiene norms But a regular latin restaurant, no matter how new and nice it looks All you have to do is stick your head in the kitchen and you'll see what I mean One by the way just this last weekend. I went into a very nice little mom-and-pop restaurant Food was really excellent kitchen was clean and when I went into the bathroom. I noticed no paper towels at all Just a damp cloth hand towel. Yuck So you can immediately drop two or three points off their 10 score next time I go there I'm gonna talk to the owner and say hey look you've got to get paper towels It's not sanitary. Otherwise and gringos expect that now normally I just never go back, but i'm not giving up on this case

[26:58] Some places, you know are worth helping out. That's the gringo advantage. You know, we spot the details and the defects They never would have spotted in this case. They were so good in other respects They just needed a little prodding and one last thing Did you happen to hear on the news? Probably not that a group of incarcerated full body tat gang members in a guatemala prison They got in a fight and 17 died. Hey with prisons like that who needs a death penalty, right? Now expat eddie says it's like that old joke What do you call a busload of lawyers at the bottom of the sea a good start south of the border? You've been listening to the expat files living in latin america coming to you twice a week from somewhere south of the border Email me the expat files at gmail.com

[27:46] And if you want me to help you sort out your own latin american plans schedule a one-on-one consult with me Just send an email and let me know at the expat files at gmail.com. Nos vemos