#540 – The Expat Files: Navigating Life, Work, and Health in Latin America

Automatically transcribed from the original recording; names and wording may contain errors.

[00:00] South of the border down Mexico way That's where I fell in love when the stars above came up to play and now I wonder Hello there all you expat wannabes. I'm Johnny Mueller and you're listening to the expat files living in Latin America The show that tells you just what it's like to live work play and or retire down here in Latin America It's a mix of the good the bad the ugly and the great and it's all right here. So let's get started Here's a controversial and sticky subject or subjects. I want to get into and we'll introduce it with an email from again Canadian listeners sounds like they want to get the hell out in a hurry, don't they? Well, you're certainly welcome But don't pack the skis the pucks or the hockey sticks. Anyway, I'll paraphrase this here as usual

[00:48] Hi, Johnny, my husband and I are Canadian expat wannabes My husband and I intend to travel to Guatemala next fall and look at Lake Atitlan as a possible retirement destination My husband has a master's in education and will also have one He's just finishing in special ed with an applied behavior analysis major by the end of the summer this year He will also have his BCBA certification by then which is board certified behavior analysis Which is a global certification. We are both in excellent health and I'm a counseling hypnotherapist myself Now we came to Saskatchewan some years ago as the health district there was looking for a consultant to create an autism Program for the northern region This program will be up and running in another year and I and my husband will be able to leave by the fall of 2017

[01:38] Now he would like to keep working and consulting part-time in the autism field But we're not sure if there would be any need for his services down in Central America at this time Do you happen to know anything about the rise of autism down in that area? Then she writes I'm also wondering if in your seminars you have professionals that understand or speak to the Canadian system of taxation For expats and non residents I've been doing a lot of reading on the subject and find there are some implications for pensioners leaving the country That is if you declare non-residency in Canada, then finally she writes by the way I read Atlas Shrugged when I was 17 and loved it Did you know there's an Atlas Shrugged movie out there now and she gives me the link and then she finishes by saying many thanks for all you're doing to help folks get a new and different start on their retirement years and

[02:25] We'll skip the names here for anonymity purposes. First. Let me mention a very crazy coincidence. Just about three days ago I was invited to guess what an Atlas Shrugged movie party Given by guess who a married couple that came down to one of my previous seminars and never left Two Canadians actually three now because they've had a baby down here since then with that Now we can directly address your retirement concerns as a Canadian because you see if you come down to one of my expat insider seminars I can personally introduce you face to face with some Canadians down here who have figured out all those Retirement angles that you've referred to and you know Some people say that's the best part of coming down to one of my seminars meeting all those people and making all those connections

[03:10] But you knew that already, right? That said let's talk about the rest of your inquiries First of all, let me say that it sounds like you two are extremely overqualified in your fields to come down here Latin America and expect to pick up where you left off you have to remember there's a Big lag time effect here. So it takes years sometimes decades for first world advancement trends technology, etc Both good and bad positive and negative to land here in Latin America Now as far as gringos and jobs are concerned lag time is very good when you're talking about Consumer items and first world fashions and fads. That's why so many successful gringo seem like clairvoyance They just bring down a first world fashion and trend that hasn't made it here yet, and they're off and running But when it comes to something that the average Latin does not see an immediate perceived value in like for example marriage counseling or alcohol

[04:02] Or drug counseling or sessions on an analyst's couch Because I'll tell you 95% of Latin's just see that kind of stuff as an outflow of cash that they're not willing to participate in That's a completely different story and you have to remember that down here in Latin America For example, if you get in an accident as a drunk driver Governments do not even impose alcohol counseling as part of the deal Unlike in the first world where that's been mandatory for decades. Yes sure enough. It'll get here, but there's a big lag time for now Okay, let's talk specifics in your email You mentioned your husband would like to keep working and consulting part-time in the autism field So then what's the state of autism here in Latin America? Well, I have to mention that I scan a lot of newspapers and news articles in Spanish every few days

[04:51] I make a point of checking that stuff out I kind of whipped through them and see what's on the radar and what the major trends are and I can tell you this I've only seen one major article in my entire life about autism It was a re-edit of a first world article that they translated into Spanish That was a half-page deal about four or five months ago Now usually in the big Latin newspapers you find articles about health stuck in as filler in the Sunday editions For example just yesterday I saw an article in a big Latin newspaper about sleep apnea though I've never met a single Latin who had it or even knows what it is Seems to be a gringo condition In fact, I've never met a Latin yet who actually knew what autism was and they call it outismo in Spanish

[05:37] Now I asked a few Latin college educated kids about autism once And one of them said, how are we supposed to know? We're business majors Meaning autism itself is so far off the radar almost no one knows what the hell it is So anyway after being down here over 26 years now I've never heard anyone bring it up in conversation or mention it at all Oh and by the way last week I saw an article in the paper about obesity They were describing all those well-known first world surgical methods to reduce the size of the stomach And to put inflatable little balloons in there etc Meanwhile Latin America has a chronic obesity problem too And I've never met a single Latin person who's ever had a surgical procedure like that Even though over 25 years ago back in Chicago I knew a handful of people who had surgeries like that done

[06:25] Talk about lag time that was over a quarter of a century ago But that's not all about a month or so ago I remember reading an article about laser eye surgery in a big Latin newspaper Meanwhile 25 years ago back in Chicago I knew more than a dozen people who had that kind of surgery done including two of my sisters And down here I've only met one person in 26 years who had that done here south of the border And guess what he was a Canadian gringo And yes it turned out just fine for him Because down here at private hospitals and clinics you can get first world treatment of all kinds If you have the money Which means only gringos in the upper five or ten percent of Latins need applied So the poor lower middle class and middle class Latins

[07:11] That other 75 to 85 percent of the Latin population Could never afford surgery like that at a private clinic And of course those decrepit national health care systems Are certainly not going to pay for obesity treatment and laser eye surgery Or in fact any elective surgery at all Now I'm talking about being off the gringo tourist trail here Which I always recommend as the final resting place for gringo expat wannabes and gonabes And the difference is of course if you're into a place like Cancun or Costa Rica or Boquete Panama On the gringo tourist trail that is You'll meet lots of people who've had stomach surgeries Laser eye surgeries Cosmetic surgeries Dental implants Hip and knee replacement surgeries You name it surgery and you'll find it's probably just as prevalent as it is up in the states

[07:58] Why? Because 95 percent of the patients getting those treatments are expat gringos Oh and by the way in more than 26 years down here I've never met a single Latin American who's had a hip or a joint replacement either A few gringos yes but not a single Latin But I digress where were we? Oh yeah Again let me repeat I've only seen one basic article about autism in the big newspapers down here And I know a number of teachers in k through 12 schools in both the public free system You know the ones with the broken lights and windows in the bathrooms that don't work etc And I know a handful of expat gringo teachers who teach at those expensive private schools And we have touched the subjects of autism It was me that brought it up As it turns out in the public schools teachers tell me nobody much talks about autism

[08:45] It's just not on their radar In fact one teacher told me when kids are spacey and inattentive and stare at the windows It's not because of autism it's because their parents are poor And they missed breakfast and possibly dinner the night before But it's a different story in those upscale private schools Where gringo habits have been thoroughly embraced Including our terrible junk food and fast food diets And yes at those schools there is talk of autism In fact a gringo teacher friend of mine says they've had some meetings And web-based seminars on the subject Which is kind of odd he said because the subject was never mentioned two or three years ago So in the free public school systems where 95% of all the other kids go Teachers are not totally unaware of autism but they pretty much don't see it

[09:30] And by the way in the boonies I understand a good percentage of kids go to school Just for the free school lunch And if the government didn't provide that meal Most kids would stay home and help with the garden and the driveway chickens So if teachers and such are talking about autism in the 5% high-end schools And even spotting them and getting counseling for them in special help Unfortunately in the public school system Like I said where 95% of the other kids go When kids are handicapped or have special needs There's a huge shortage of special schools classrooms and programs for them And occasionally do-gooder first world organizations will step in and try to help Though most would much rather build solar outhouses for Jesus Because you know actually building something out of brick mortar and glasses

[10:17] Better PR to attract more donations It's the politics of non-profit do-gooder marketing you know So then what happens when kids in the upper 5% have some kind of disability Whether it's learning or social or otherwise Well for two to at most $500 a month The parents will hire another maid or live-in nurse To look out for babysitting manage the kid And remember three to five hundred bucks a month That would be about the cost of a few hours of private psychological counseling in the states That said let me give you some firsthand examples of family trouble I know of the case of a 15 year old latin girl who ran away from home a couple of times And the final time she returned She came back with bleach blonde hair and a couple of tattoos

[11:02] Which was the last straw for her parents and the teachers at her public school Here's how it turned out Her parents teachers and administrator had her public school Made a referral for her to see a school psychologist Now public schools down here do not have a psychologist on staff Like they will up in the states it's required up there The private schools down here however do have a psychologist on staff Or at least on call Anyway they made a referral for her to see a regular psychologist And the cost for a private session with a psychologist down here Believe it or not five to twenty bucks an hour So if you got the door you can get an appointment now I mean in the next hour Now up in the states unless it was an emergency You'd probably have to wait a week or two for an appointment But down here almost no psychiatrist or psychologist is busy

[11:50] Why because latin american universities are pumping out psychology majors like crazy Meanwhile there's almost no demand Sound familiar? But you'll get a more than suitable for framing diploma Which will open the doors for a job at mcdonald's or starbucks Now can you see why they charge five to twenty bucks a session? So for the parents of the kid The choices were to go to a regular private psychologist at five to twenty bucks an hour Or to a government sponsored public treatment center Where they have child psychiatrists in the national healthcare system And of course it's free but you get a referral there And you'll wait for weeks because you'll have to first see a regular MD And then he'll have to refer you for an appointment with a government child psychologist So you'll spend a day or two or three running from government building to building

[12:38] Standing in lines getting forms signed and sealed etc Playing the hurry up and wait game that governments are so good at In fact they invented it And just to clarify things a bit All latin countries have failing decrepit national healthcare systems That include all the branches of healthcare including psychiatric treatment etc And by the way if you have to walk into one of those buildings Be sure to bring a can of glade And yes they do have glade air freshener down here They call it glade Go figure huh? In fact not so long ago I walked into a government healthcare facility Just to have a look around and take a few photos from my youtube channel and 7r files So anyway there I was in this big smelly scruffy lobby just packed with people All of them a bit sweaty and disheveled Looking like they'd been sitting there for hours and they were

[13:25] It was what you'd expect Young kids crawling around on the floor looking for something to do And even younger kids in their mother's arms crying a bit Some talking way too loud for conditions And by the way tell me if this bugs you or not Why do young kids in restaurants stores and public places Always seem to talk at the highest volume possible Drowning out everyone else who's got something to say Then suddenly at around 11 or 12 years old They start modulating their voices like normal people Does that bother you or is that just me? Though I have noticed that in latin america it seems to be an upper class kid phenomena While lower middle class and poor kids seem to be well under control Anyway the lady at the reception desk at the government medical facility Didn't seem to be concerned with too much of anything that was job related

[14:13] Because she was on wassup on her cell phone practically the whole time I was there Or maybe that is government work Anyway there was a big hand drawn sign in the waiting room That said please don't ask to use the restrooms They're out of order Part for the course and why I guess the whole place smelled like a urinal So anyway that's the state of the national healthcare systems in latin america And if any of you listeners up in the states like our canadian friends Who sent this email are thinking of transferring your career skills down here It's not going to be in the public sector that's for sure Even though that's where about 90 percent of the healthcare action is You're going to have to set your sights on that very narrow private sector Or perhaps work for a well-funded first world do-gooder NGO There's plenty of them down here and they pay pretty good salaries too

[15:00] The administrators always make good dough And the grunt workers and volunteers practically nothing But where were we oh yeah So note all private k-12 schools have a child psychologist or psychiatrist on staff That's a selling point They promise that in their promotional material It's a big selling point because it follows the first world gringoized model A model by the way no matter how screwed up latin's totally admire and aspire to So how's that work well I just happen to know one of those young ladies Who works as a child psychologist in a helicopter school But the fact is she says she only goes in about eight hours a week Why because she says it's a new concept in latin america not too well known yet Except for I understand now argentina And I want to thank two expat seminar alumni dean and erica for that info

[15:48] They've been to argentina recently and told me about it It seems psychiatric and psychological analysis and counseling is all the rage down there So why might that be when in the rest of latin america You almost never meet anyone who's been to counseling or analysis Well if I was a tech guest I'd say it's because argentina has the highest European ancestry and population by far in all of latin america And was once considered almost first world though now it's pretty much a failed state So you've got a country that's mostly filled with light-skinned first world wannabes Who I can tell you for a fact believe that they're socially and culturally Superior to the other 19 latin countries How do I know that well because latin's from other countries have told me so In fact those few soap operas and telling novellas that come out of argentina

[16:36] Are considered by latin's from other countries to be very high class and superior to the usual Telling novellas and soap operas that come out of mexico In fact many times latin's from other countries have told me that argentino's Are stuck up have a superiority complex And really do believe their feces is not melodorous So anyway as far as psychologists down here in latin america Universities are turning them out like mcdonald's turns out happy meals In fact over the years I've hired at least three graduate psychologists To work as translator ladies and helpers at my expat seminars I can always find unemployed psychology majors down here They're everywhere and oddly enough down here seems like female psychology majors Outnumber men 10 to 1 And by the way over the years I've met quite a few

[17:23] But I know of only one who actually has a job in her field How'd she get that job easy her parents have dough They're connected and she went to a helicopter school herself And still it's not even a full-time job And she's been at it about three years now And funny enough because her parents have dough she doesn't have to work And by the way she drives a better car than any of the gringo teachers at that school And her dirty little secret she too has a bodyguard But she makes him stay home she goes to work alone The fact is she probably spends more on gas each week than she gets paid Oh and by the way I asked one of these lady psychologists What the most common reason for a kid to get a psychological referral Remember we're talking about high-end private schools here So most of the kids get gringo sicknesses

[18:10] Anyway she said the top three are depression Anti-social behavior which leads to disruptions in the class And get this bullying which doesn't even have a name in Spanish Believe it or not they had to co-op the English word So bullying at least as a clinical term in Latin America Has only been around a couple of years Even though of course bullying's been around since the days of the Neanderthals Who I bet were all bullies and if they existed today They'd all be in counseling and on psychotropic drugs In fact just recently I happened to catch a public service announcement commercial about bullying Hey that's not to say it doesn't exist and it's not a problem it really is I mean come on I was bullied as a kid You probably were bullied too or maybe you were a bully yourself I mean come on there's always one big bad bully in every classroom

[18:56] And if you have dogs you probably notice they bully each other too So do monkeys and most mammals even birds Ask any zookeeper who the bully is in the monkey cage Or the rhino cage He knows in a heartbeat So what's next? Simeon bully support group therapy You remember bullies in junior high school and high school How'd you handle it? You either stood up to them Got somebody else to fight your fight Or lived in fear between classes right? Personally I was a wise ass And I dodged a lot of fists myself And how did I handle bullies? Well in junior high and high school I was in a rock band And I selected a big strong talentless lug to be our drummer But his real job was to be the bodyguard for our smaller guys in the band Hey it worked for me But there are always those who get bullied mercilessly and have no defense

[19:44] Like for example a brilliant kid in my junior high and high school class named Stanley A nerd before the word was even coined And he was bullied mercilessly However he got his revenge at our tenure class reunion He was still a nerd but a millionaire software nerd And all the hot girls who thought he was revolting way back when Well those girls 10 years later Now divorced from their no longer cool high school sweetarts and football jocks Guess who those somewhat desperate ladies sucked up to at the tenure reunion? Stanley But he was having none of it so he did get his revenge Now nice guy that Stanley was I remember way back when he used to occasionally eat his boogers So I can see why some guys bullied him Okay now staying on a very similar subject

[20:31] I'll read part of another email to you You'll see how these two emails sort of intersect I'll paraphrase here and in next week's show read another part of this email that's pretty interesting Anyway here goes Says hi Johnny enjoying your show I've spent six months in Guatemala over the past four years Which I enjoy for its volcanic views Green green vegetation Colonial architecture Eternal spring Altiplano weather Yes I've found the altiplano And more than anything else I like the friendliness of the people My family and I found that we were able to make friends quite easily And were very endeared by the warmth of the people Most of my time has been spent in Antigua Though I've been to visit Lake Atitlan which is truly gorgeous As well as Coban and Flores which is too hot

[21:19] And of course Tikal the great Mayan city of pyramids I've also climbed the volcanoes of the area multiple times Pacaya, Volcán de Agua and Acatanango I'm also a beekeeper and a horse owner Now Johnny you're always plugging the benefits Of being off the gringo tourist trail And that's pretty much where we've been most of the time Now here's the thing One of my daughters is mentally handicapped slash brain damaged We've sought some help for her through the quote institutes Unquote based in Philadelphia This organization was among the first to realize the plasticity of the human brain And works wonders in teaching the brain injured to see here walk and communicate What they've done is really mind-blowing I saw one of their patients that had never communicated or walked

[22:05] During their first 18 years of life Learned to communicate walk and write a book My own daughter who didn't feel pain as a toddler Learned to feel sensations which as you can imagine is very important But get this That particular organization has a little branch of itself In San Lucas, Guatemala Right near Antigua Where we send my daughter to school While we visit Antigua Guatemala It's called the Institutes for the Achievement of Human Potential Central America Then he gives all the contact information Telephone numbers The people in charge The email etc Then he goes on to say My contact there is a lady named Veronica Ordones Who is on site overseeing things

[22:51] Now Johnny they execute the Philadelphia mothership principles The best they can On virtually no money And it's done in somewhat a third world way too We send our daughter with her own personal aid And daily roll of toilet paper by the way Nevertheless they seem to be doing profoundly important work On next to a zero budget I thought if you got up to speed on the organization and their work You could perhaps focus on it and give it a plug They do great work and really could use some donations Anyway sorry to write you such a long tome Having listened to you talk for so many hours I feel like I'm getting to know you a bit I hope all is well with you And you don't let the challenges of life get you down Signed No Anonymous Okay thanks for that Mr. No Anonymous

[23:38] And I in fact will pass on that information For anyone who wants the full details Just send me an email at theexpedfiles.gmail.com If you're interested in helping out the Institutes for the Achievement of Human Potential in Central America Now listening to this email You have to understand that if you have a handicapped family member And you are a Latin American living here There's probably about a 90% probability you'll get zero help from the government And you'll have to depend on outside foreign agencies or NGOs Do-gooders etc for any kind of extra care your child or family member might need However if you're a typical gringo Or in that 5% of the upper middle class or wealthy You could well afford to hire a full-time living maid or nurse

[24:24] To be a 24-7 caretaker and personal assistant to that family member And thankfully No Anonymous our email writer was lucky enough to find a small branch Of an organization up in the states that does that kind of work That fits right in with his own daughter's special needs And with his plans to move down to Central America So now reflecting all this back to our first email couple Our autism specialist and his wife the certified hypnotherapist I guess you're beginning to see that to get work in your field it's going to be very spotty It will take some luck too And to pay a fraction of what you're making up in the state However as you know all you really need to do is make between 20 and 25 thousand dollars a year For a couple to live a nice first world life

[25:09] And maybe for you it's not about the money at all It's about doing the kind of work you really like And do remember it when you're on the gringo tourist trail You're going to have a lot of gringo competition Exactly what you don't want And if there's one thing I harp on over and over again If you're going to start a business down here You don't want to have gringo competition Latin competition that's a okay But do remember counselors and therapists are getting five to twenty dollars an hour And almost all of them are working part time They don't have full schedules even at those rates And why should that be? Well some people say it's not a culture that values or embraces psychology psychiatry or any kind of personal one-on-one counseling or therapy Except when coming from a priest

[25:56] Then the question comes do they even need it? Well the latest statistics say one in three adult Latin males is an alcoholic Not to mention spousal abuse is endemic So yes Latins do have their hang ups like everyone else But in a macho society the men especially are loathe to seek professional help Now in the 60s and 70s most Americans didn't know a single person who'd ever been to a psychiatrist Unless of course they lived in Hollywood or New York City Same thing with the general population here in Latin America right now The average person here knows no one who's seen a psychiatrist or has been to counseling However in the first world today we all know people who get some sort of counseling on a regular basis In fact I was reading an article just the other day that said Woody Allen Who himself has been in weekly analysis for about 50 years now

[26:45] When his son Satchel turned three years old He hooked him up with a shrink on a twice weekly basis at three years old And the kid was seemingly normal But Woody thought what's good for the goose is good for the gander Now to me that's reason 2476 why you just have to get the hell out of the US Or VWYF as expat Eddie would say Which means vote with your feet while there's still time Oops we're getting towards the end now Don't forget to go to www the new expat.com and listen to master blogger John Galt tell his version of the good the bad the ugly and the great here in Latin America And while you're at it check out my expat files YouTube channel and do subscribe it's free

[27:32] South of the border You've been listening to the expat files living in Latin America Coming to you twice a week from somewhere south of the border Email me the expat files at gmail.com And if you want me to help you sort out your own Latin American plans Schedule a one-on-one consult with me Just send an email and let me know at the expat files at gmail.com