#568 – The Expat Files: Residency, Language, and Life in Latin America

Automatically transcribed from the original recording; names and wording may contain errors.

[00:00] South of the border down Mexico way That's where I fell in love when the stars above came up to play and now as I wonder Hello there all you expat wannabes. I'm Johnny Mueller and you're listening to the expat files living in Latin America The show that tells you just what it's like to live work play and or retire down here in Latin America It's a mix of the good the bad the ugly and the great and it's all right here. So let's get started Now here's something that's of great interest to a lot of would-be expats We're looking for a cheap and an easier way to get residency in Latin country And no, I'm not talking about finding a local Latino or Latina and getting hitched either though, by the way

[00:45] That's a shoe in for a permanent residency, but you have to be married one year before you can apply, you know to discourage marriages of convenience or Inconvenience whichever way you want to look at it. Anyway, the email I'm gonna read now discusses a few things We've never really spoken about before not in great detail Anyway, it basically concerns you gonna be isn't want to be is up there in the states who have University degrees and think you might want to come down to Latin America and take a shot at working in your own field However to do that to work on the books anyway, you'll have to get permanent residency Now as you'll soon find out just having a degree sometimes Opens the door to get permanent residency without making any investment or having a pension or Social Security Just the degree is enough to have a fast track to residency Now as I pointed out in the show a long long time ago

[01:33] Probably three or four years ago third world countries are always short on educated professionals And if you've got something to offer they make it easy for you to get in but do remember if you come to Latin America hoping to set up shop in your chosen first world career chances are you'll be paid a quarter to a fifth Though what you've been paid up in the states Hey, it's that differential cross of living thing that brings so many of us gringos down here Latin America in the first place Oh, and if you decide to pursue your chosen first world career on the gringo tourist trail Like in Panama Costa Rica or in most of Mexico, you'll have exactly what you don't want gringo competition However on the plus side you won't have to learn Spanish But if you're off the gringo tourist trail and decide to pursue your chosen first world career Your gringo advantage will be very strong and you'll probably have good business from the start

[02:23] But you'll have to learn some Spanish. Anyway, let's get to this email. So you'll know a bit better what I'm talking about It starts. Oh la Johnny. I live in Ecuador. Luckily here you can get your professional Residency with a college degree this requires no investment no land purchase or proof of retirement income Which is quite good because I'm only 40 ish now as for me I'm about to partner up with a man in Florida that has a shipping company and needs to reach out to gringos in Latin America How much do you know about different gringo communities in Latin America? I know how to access them in Ecuador, but I have not yet traveled anywhere else since down here in Ecuador I'm always stuck doing $2 an hour jobs in bars and restaurants. Anyway, Johnny. Thanks for all your advice and help

[03:09] I really enjoy the show. By the way, when I meet other expats, I always send them a link to your show Paula in Ecuador Okay, Paula. Thanks for that You know, I've always known that most Latin countries have the same kind of deal meaning what they call residency based on being a professional Getting residency that way is pretty much unknown to most people because most gringos simply don't qualify why? They require you to be a scientific type an engineer biologist doctor geologist, etc, etc with a degree from a qualified university and by the way to qualify for a residency based on a professional degree It must be in a career that's wanting in that particular Latin country In other words forget about degrees like art drama physical therapy and african-american studies

[03:56] Also, you have to check out carefully if those professional residency programs lead to a passport in five years or so Like your regular residencies generally do because that's not always the case and our object Of course is always to try to get that second passport to have that plan bead ready when the feces hits the ventilator up in The first world because if you have one passport just an American passport, you'll always be subject to a periodic fleecing But with a second passport, you could always give uncle Sam the finger. So bottom line getting a professional Residency visa depends on the kind of diploma you have and which university you graduated from So if you got that aromatherapy or truck driving school diploma from winnabago tech in Sioux Falls, Iowa

[04:43] Don't feel embarrassed apply. We're talking about Latin America here, by the way Here's what the official Ecuador government website says about the Ecuadorian professional visa and I'll translate here It says it's for professional with university degrees Recognized by a national university who wish to practice their profession in Ecuador Hmm. So there's the hitch. It looks like if you get this kind of residency You'll have to practice your profession in Ecuador though again, it is Latin America So who's checking and if so, how long do you have to practice that profession? Hmm, I wonder then it goes out to say should the applicant's profession not exist in Ecuador The degree must be locally certified The applicant must also fulfill the Ecuadorian requirements for such a practice such as bar and medical exams, etc

[05:30] Okay. Now you might remember maybe three or four months ago I mentioned that quite a few medical professionals come down and do charity work doctors without borders and all that Well, they can do as many extensive surgeries as they want as long as they're doing it for free But to set up an office hang your shingle or get privileges at a hospital Well, you got to take the medical board exam in that country and remember it'll be a written and oral exam in Spanish with no Help from a translator, which is why almost no first world doctors ever practice in foreign countries Not making a living at it on a day-to-day basis. Anyway, however, there are thousands of top-notch Latin medical doctors Who went up to the states to get their medical specialties and came back down to their home countries to practice Those are the docs that'll be treating you when you come down and visit some of these first world medical centers

[06:20] By the way, they make about a fifth of what first world doctors make So then what would be the point for a first world gringo doctor to come down and set up a medical practice here unless it's For charity and he's doing most of it for nothing So yes, a lot of them do come down and live as expats, but they don't practice as doctors Mostly they come down to retire because they love living in Latin America and when down here they engage in the hobbies They never had time for up in the states, you know gardening painting sculpting writing deep-sea fishing salsa Merengue, ayahuasca, but they don't come down to take the medical boards and start working I've never ever heard of that. Oh by the way in regards to Ecuador Paula sent me a second email explaining the process of becoming a resident based on your profession

[07:06] She says if you're looking for permanent residency with a degree for your otherwise You first have to go to a site called Senesit. That's S-E-N-E-S-C-Y-T That's a government website that shows you the authorized degrees that allow you to apply for a professional visa She says it turns out if your college or university is already listed there. The approval process is shorter By the way, I checked it out and there's a PDF that shows every college and university that's accepted. There are 1600 of them worldwide Anyway, Paula goes out to say mine was not listed So I had to wait three months to have my college approved My degree was a BA in liberal arts turns out although it seems president Correa of Ecuador

[07:53] Wants educated people to move here a lot of people are not familiar with what's called the 9v Visa the professional work visa now as for me I did the paperwork myself and completed the residency and everything for around 600 bucks the local lawyers I contacted tried to scam me and they were not even familiar with this type of residency How about that? Most gringos here need their hand held for practically everything and most spend thousands and thousands on their residencies The lack of common sense amongst gringos makes me wonder how most got here in the first place Hey have to stop a second. It's me Johnny again boy Is she preaching to the choir as for me every time I'm slightly near the gringo tourist trail I can't believe how many clueless gringos I run into and get this people who take my expat insider seminars

[08:44] Always seem to spot clueless gringos too. In fact, I bet it wasn't even three days ago I was talking to John Galton. He told me a couple of clueless gringo stories us long-term Expats are always amazed that these people find their way down here Of course, most all of them are on the gringo tourist trail and they seem to find each other too But let's move on then Paula says right now I've completed the two-year requirement for my permanent residency But I cannot leave the country for more than three months in a three year period. Those are the rules. Okay It's me again Now remember once you've had permanent residency for five years or so you can apply for your passport at that point You'll need your Latin lawyer again. I'd say very few gringos could do that on their own For one thing you will have to fill out some paperwork and it will be in 100% Spanish

[09:32] So you'll have to know some Spanish and of course the people you deal with at the immigration office and you'll be going to a lot of windows and talking to and Dealing with a lot of government slugs. They'll all be speaking to you in Spanish, too So how much Spanish do you really need when you're at that stage where you'll be applying for a passport? Remember that's about five years after you've got permanent residency I'd say at a minimum your Spanish has to be six out of a possible ten But by then you'll have five years or so in a Spanish speaking country And you should through osmosis be able to pick up enough to get you over that hurdle However, if you're on the gringo tourist trail or even off the trail, but in a gringo enclave You're gonna have to make a concerted effort to learn your Spanish In fact, I lived in Costa Rica for two and a half years early on in my adventure and I had Costa Rican

[10:18] Residency and even though back then some 25 years ago It was ridiculously easy to get but I never could have done it myself And it was my lawyer who held my hand when I went to immigration and did all that talking for me because I didn't know what The hell was going on. He just gave me a pen and pointed to certain pieces of paper and said sign here here here And here and even after two and a half years in Costa Rica. I picked up virtually no Spanish I was probably a two out of a possible ten I didn't even know enough Spanish to figure out my electric or my water bill and forget about the phone bill You could be almost a hundred percent fluent and never figure that out So all in all it took me a little over five years two and a half years on the gringo tourist trail and about three years off the gringo tourist trail to where I figured I was around a six on

[11:04] One to ten scale in Spanish enough to get around anywhere in conversational Spanish But I still couldn't write any better than a second grader So if I really wanted to embarrass myself, all I had to do is jot something down in Spanish That's when you really feel like an idiot However, I'm talking about before the internet before Google Translate was even a concept. Ah, yes Google Translate which gives so many gringos and expats that sorely needed extra artificial boost of confidence By the way, here's a tip for you If your Spanish really sucks in you absolutely have to write something in Spanish without the aid of anyone else Believe me, you will have to do that eventually whether it's with your cleaning lady your maintenance guy the car mechanic whoever well to test How bad your written Spanish really is write it first in your bad Spanish then put it in Google Translate and see how it comes

[11:53] Out in English. Yep. See how it comes out in English Then you'll be able to see just what kind of kindergarten or first grade skills you really have But honestly Google Translate is pretty damn good. I'd say it's about 95% accurate sometimes even better than that So as much as I hate Google and would love to see the place vaporized The only slightly redeeming feature they have is Google Translate and a long time ago when Google Maps first came out I thought that was pretty cool But now I realize it's only a sneaky surveillance and data gathering technique Which is why for the last probably five years now, the only search engine I ever use is start page It's Google alright, but your IP address has been stripped off So they can't track you and you'll never get a pop-up ad window either Why because now they don't know who you are and what you've been searching for so they can't target you

[12:42] But where were we? Oh, yeah back at Ecuador talking about using your first world education to get residency Now at this point I got the feeling you're thinking Ecuador is a pretty advanced little country They're trying to get brainy first world folks to move there man if they got it together Well think again listen to this email that I got maybe three weeks ago. It says dear Johnny Did you know that in Ecuador many of the college professors and high school teachers have not received their salaries from Sennict that's the Ministry of higher education science and technology By the way that Sennict website is the one Paula told us that you had to go to to check if your university Qualifies for you to get that professional visa Permanent residency status anyway that email goes on to say that Sennict again

[13:30] That stands for the Ministry of higher education science and technology for Ecuador is six months in arrears on paying the salary of hundreds of teachers Then the email says you know Johnny try living without pay for six months That's not easy But what most affects these teachers is the fear of losing their positions if they come out in protest against the Ministry of higher Education because as it turns out those who have are generally replaced with what they call teaching Technicians that would be maestro's technikos in espanol now. They're not really qualified teachers You see they're just recent graduates who haven't had any teaching experience yet. They haven't done. What's called in Latin America practicas, that's practicas

[14:16] Which means practice in English they call that student teaching up in the states Which you must do before you can graduate Then he goes out to say did you know that the many high school teachers and college professors who do get paid on time? Are the ones who have a connection or direct contact with the Ministry of higher education or people working there? And down here in Spanish. They call it quayo that's quayo and when Latin people say it they generally touch the back of their necks a Gesture that means favoritism or nepotism or simply connections Alright, then the email goes on to say they can't pay their teachers In fact the Ministry of higher education and Ecuador owes over a million dollars in back pay Then he says funny though how the Korea government has 400,000 bucks to donate to the International Center for advanced communication studies for Latin America called

[15:08] CSBAL CIA SPAL whose thinly veiled goal is an ideological crusade against Independent media a socialist group that openly supports government censorship Then the email goes on to say even though the teachers had not been paid for months Classes started on April 4th and a few hundred unpaid teachers still showed up why because they were afraid not to By the way, he said teachers at the University of Guayaquil are also unpaid They have not seen a contract and are working without one now Okay. Now, it's me again. I know that's a kind of a specific email. That's why I didn't read it earlier Obviously, you know, I get a lot of emails and I can't read every one of them But since we're talking about Ecuador and getting professional teaching residences

[15:54] Why not mention some glaring deficiencies in their own educational system now Do note that in every country in Latin America teachers get paid late sometimes very late even six months late is not unusual Of course, we're talking about the crappy dilapidated ill-equipped so-called free public school systems, of course However, when discussing private schools in Latin America, we're talking about a completely different subject, but you knew that already Bottom line getting back to the point of whether you can or cannot Get a fast easy track to residency because of your profession or the university you attended up in the States Well, you see it seems very few people know much about those programs Even the lawyers in the country are kind of clueless Why because those programs are rarely used by your average expat gringo

[16:41] Which means if you're interested you have to do a lot of research online yourself By the way, were you paying attention to that part of Paula's email when she said she completed the first two years of her permanent Residency and for the next three years of her residency, she can't leave the country for more than three months That would be an average of a month a year So the question is are you ready for that because if you stay out longer without a really good excuse like death in The family whatever you'll lose your residency status and I'll have to start all over again That said if you don't pretty much want to be landlocked in the Latin country You're obtaining your residency and you should select one that has a much more lenient travel policy because you know for now Anyway, some Latin countries like Guatemala will let you maintain your residency if you're out of the country

[17:30] 364 days a year. Yep. You only need one day a year in the country to maintain your residency Almost sounds impossible even unbelievable, doesn't it? But it's true now I'll tell you there are very few Latin countries that have that kind of leniency That said this is as good a time as any to mention my upcoming Latin American insider seminar in July 2016 in fact It starts just about a month from when this show will first be aired if you're working on or thinking about a plan B You really have to come to this seminar You'll get yourself a big head start if anything you'll save yourself tens of thousands of dollars and learning what not to do And that's just a small part of it So by all means go to www.thenewexpat.com click on Johnny's 2016 seminar link for the sign-up details and

[18:19] While you're there check out John Galt's pre and post seminar tours, too If you're coming all the way down to the seminar, you really don't want to miss getting those extra boots on the ground Oh, and by the way, I'd like to talk a second about repeat offenders Yes, every single seminar I've ever had except the very first one, of course, there have been repeat offenders In fact, I've had people repeat three even four times can't be my jokes That's for sure Anyway, for those of you who already attended one of my previous seminars and you want to do it again become repeat offenders Remember because you've been down before you get a thousand dollars off the regular price So just keep that in mind if you want to come down as a repeat offender And now something of interest for all expats who've already landed You're gonna buy stuff when you get down here Even if you ship a container down with all your household items

[19:06] Eventually things will break and you'll have to buy some big ticket items Now you longtime listeners will remember that I mentioned the first world franchises that have landed down here like Sears and Ace Hardware Office Depot, etc. I mentioned they offer the same guarantees and return policies as their counterparts back in the states So for example, if you buy a TV at Costco and it breaks under warranty you bring it back. They'll fix it No questions asked as long as you have the original receipt In fact, many of the US store branches have that 30-day return policy No questions asked and you don't even have to have a good reason to bring it back Same with Walmart, Ace Hardware, Office Depot, all the first world franchises that have landed here Now remember there are a lot of big local supermarkets and chain stores, too

[19:52] now in many cases the local appliance and furniture stores For example have lower prices than Walmart or Costco and definitely cheaper than Sears and they carry some of the very same products By the way, it seems like Sears is always a bit more expensive than everyone else Which is probably why they're going bankrupt up in the States Anyway, like I said, sometimes you'll see a big ticket appliance item a lot cheaper at one of the local chain stores And lots of gringos will say well, I'm not gonna buy my stuff there I'd rather buy it at Walmart Costco or Sears because if something goes wrong some months down the road They're good for it You get that first-world guarantee and they're happy to do it with a smile Whereas every gringo and expat down here knows that if you buy at another store a local store

[20:39] It's often like pulling teeth to get them to do a simple warranty repair They'll come up with a dozen ways to put the blame on you and get out of the warranty if they can't believe me I know I've been there. That said with the locally owned retail businesses customer service Well just ain't but that's not to say there aren't some positive steps in that direction These days every single Latin American country now has a consumer advocate division Believe it or not Obviously something again copied from the first world Which usually means big publicity and a good start then after a few months like all things Latin having to do with government The whole effort kind of fades away Which in most cases is a good thing. We just love governments that are toothless, don't we? However, after I tell the following story, you'll see it's not so cut and dried

[21:26] So like I said Latin governments now have new consumer advocate divisions and normally you'd say so what? They have police departments and transit departments and environmental divisions, etc And they're all toothless too. So then you'd assume the consumer advocate division is toothless also, right? Well, not quite Latin countries are getting on board with an actual consumer complaint book Libro de chaos, which means the book of complaints say what what's that all about? Well, it turns out that in the last year or so all legitimate business That is businesses on the books must have a government issued book of complaints at the cash register or checkout window Of course the books in Spanish and the complaint pages you fill out are in Spanish

[22:13] So if you're ever gonna complain and use one of these things, you're gonna have to know your Spanish You'll bring some bilingual person in with you, but then you might be thinking well, this is Latin America What happens if you fill in one of those complaint pages? Who cares? Why bother? What's gonna happen? Most likely nothing because this is Latin America, right? Well, guess what the other day I was pissed off enough and I had the time to actually fill out one of those complaints and here's how it went down But first let's start at the beginning about a year and a half ago I went into a computer store chain. No, not a first world chain. They don't have them down here It was a Latin computer store chain and I bought a Samsung external hard drive, you know for backup and right on the original Samsung box it said three year guarantee now that was about a year and a half ago Then just three days ago. It kind of just locked up and froze me out. I couldn't access it anymore

[23:04] So I brought it back down to the original computer store a pretty good sized chain, by the way At least 25 stores. So anyway, I walked in with the hard drive and the original receipt Now you have to have that or you won't get anywhere and the tech plugged it in and says yeah, you're right It's locked up something's wrong with it Now remember all this is being done in a hundred percent Spanish not at word of English is being spoken and I said, okay Can you fix it? And he said well if we can't we'll give you a new one if it's under warranty So I pulled out my receipt and he said nope, but it's only guaranteed for a year And I said wait a minute. It says right on the box three years He says yeah, that might be where you come from in Los Estados up in the states We only guarantee that stuff for a year and sure enough He showed me the fine print on the back of the receipt that said one year guarantee

[23:50] However, it said right on a Samsung box three year guarantee not three year guarantee in the US Just three year guarantee. So not being in dire need of that thing I walked over to the front desk and spotted that libro de quejas that book of complaints I opened the book and must have had a hundred pages and only the first two pages were filled and I noticed the date on The very first complaint was around a year ago So obviously this place either didn't have very many people complaining or no one knew what the book was actually for or maybe they did Know but didn't bother because they thought it was a waste of time So anyway, I filled it out being the first and probably only gringo ever to do that thinking It was a waste of time myself and guess what within the hour

[24:35] I got a phone call from the manager that store Told me to bring my hard drive back in and they'd fix it or give me a new one man was I surprised I drove right back. They had the thing for around a half an hour, but managed to fix it They didn't have to give me a new one work fine. They just upgraded it with a new software Then the manager of the store appeared now, this is a pretty big place They must have a 25 people working there. So this guy was really going out of his way He opened the book to my page and he said we both have to sign right here that we resolve the problem And I said, okay, so I signed he signed now. Remember all this is going down in Spanish, too Then I said to him man. I can't believe how fast you guys resolve this thing I didn't think anyone would even look at that book and he said, oh, yes

[25:21] We have to look at those books. In fact if someone has a complaint where by law Supposed to resolve it within eight days And if we don't you can request a hearing with the government consumer representative They'll find us around 25 bucks and they'll put the complaints up on a website for all to see so it worked But here's my opinion. So bottom line I believe in consumer protection and all that but I don't believe it should be in the hands of government But at least for once here in Latin America You have some recourse if you buy a product and something's wrong with it So in some cases at least it's no longer buyer beware The consumer has some recourse if things go south That said when you're down here shopping be on the lookout for one of those libros the chaos Yep, every store has one So in reality if you fill one out it puts the fear of the Lord into the owner and the employees

[26:09] Which on the one hand should make for better customer service in the long run But don't hold your breath and I'll tell you I know for sure that store owners and employees do not want you to know That book exists. In fact, I just recently found out about it myself through a Latin newspapers journalist By the way when the manager phoned me up, you know, I instantly thought yep That's my gringo advantage working for me again Why else would I get a call back at all and just one hour later? Nope, this time it wasn't the gringo advantage But the fact that he didn't want to pay a fine or have his company blacklisted on that unresolved complaint website So, how about you? Do you think it's a good idea to have a complaint book? Well, I like the idea but I don't like that the government's involved That just means more bureaucracy more puss-brained lard ass slugs and even the potential for extortion and bribes

[27:00] But for now, anyway, at least in the initial stages, it seems to work However, just a few weeks ago I saw an op-ed piece Pointing out that Latins have zero faith in their government and thus zero faith in those libros the chaos Now the journalist in the op-ed piece had also interviewed a number of people on the street and to no one's surprise Most of them didn't even know those books existed Okay, I want to remind you now check out my youtube channel to see the crazy visuals that go along with the show do subscribe It's free You've been listening to the expat files living in Latin America coming to you twice a week from somewhere south of the border Email me the expat files at gmail.com

[27:46] And if you want me to help you sort out your own Latin American plans schedule a one-on-one consult with me Just send an email and let me know at the expat files at gmail.com. No spamos