#638 – The Expat Files: Aviation, Residency, and Safety in Latin America

Automatically transcribed from the original recording; names and wording may contain errors.

[00:00] South of the border down Mexico way That's where I fell in love when the stars above came up to play and now I wonder Hello there all you expat wannabes. I'm Johnny Mueller and you're listening to the expat files living in Latin America The show that tells you just what it's like to live work play and or retire down here in Latin America It's a mix of the good the bad the ugly and the great and it's all right here. So let's get started Hey, here's something that's pretty weird. You know, there are very few American industries left We know that right, but you'd think that Boeing aircraft, you know, like the 767 They work horse of the air would at least be American made

[00:46] Well, you'd be mistaken because most of the wing is made in the US but the fuselage, you know the center tube guess We're in Japan and the flaps and some other electronics in Italy. Meanwhile, most of the other interior electronics China hard to imagine or is it hmm? Oh, by the way You should never ever drink regular water on the plane Even though they'll serve it to you anytime you ask even if you have to take a pill Skip their water and especially don't ask for anything with ice that ice made on the plane is with that very same Contaminated water and as for pills make sure you take them with some kind of liquid that you got from a sealed bottle Because you know in the planes Bacteria levels well exceed the norms and who sets the norms. Well, of course some government agency can trust them, right?

[01:37] Anyway, since it's so well known in the aviation industry that the water's so bad in the airplanes They're adding not only chlorine but all kinds of other chemical additives to hold those bacteria populations down. Yum. Yum What I'm saying is don't ask for just a glass of water Make sure you get something that's in a bottle and you've opened the seal yourself Or at least you watch the flight attendant do it for you now You know, I travel a lot and I found out that just recently anyway In some cases I haven't been able to bring my really dinky water purifier along on the plane You know as a carry-on could be a bomb who knows a grenade and if I threw it in the airplanes water reservoir tank It would turn into a dirty bomb, right? Anyway, if you're gonna bring your water purifier or even one of those purifiers that has a straw attachment

[02:23] Stow it in your luggage or as you pass through TSA, they just might confiscate it and then you're out what 20 to 50 bucks In fact, I was told by one grossly overweight TSA guy in Panama. Yep They've got their own Latin version of TSA slugs there certainly trained by their US counterparts You know because Panama is a strategic country being that has the canal and all anyway He said if your canister or purifier has any liquid in it whatsoever You can't bring it through as a carry-on by the way People have asked me if there's some kind of war or conflict breaking out in the first world What would be the safest countries in Latin America to hang out and my answer? Well, I could tell you the three least safe countries to be in my opinion, of course Mexico because it's got a border with the US and Panama because it's got the canal and number three

[03:13] Argentina because it's got a couple of nuke plants The fact is I wouldn't want to live within a couple hundred miles of a nuke plant anywhere much less in Latin America Where maintenance is kind of an afterthought by the way, this show is going out on March 3rd 2017 and as promised the sign-up sheet for my July 2017 expat insider seminar to be held off The gringo tourist trail in and around Guatemala Central America is up and ready to go at www the new expat dot-com website so if you want to kick your plan be into high gear and Get an extremely valuable boots on the ground experience go to the new expat dot-com website Again, the new expat dot-com and you'll see right at the center of the page a link to my July

[03:59] 2017 expat insider seminar if you click on that It'll take you to the sign-up sheet and you'll see all the details and exactly what it's all about and remember This is the perfect chance to kill two birds with one stone not only to come to the seminar But to do it a lot of smart expats have been doing that would be applying for permanent or temporary Residence in Guatemala at the very same time now Remember Guatemala is one of the easiest places in all Latin America to get your permanent or temporary residency for temporary residency You don't have to prove any kind of income whatsoever Then after a year and a half two years is you slip automatically into permanent residency now If you have an income of a thousand dollars a month or more coming from an outside source pension trust Social security real estate rentals, whatever then you can go right to permanent residency and after that five years

[04:47] They'll get you to your passport and nationality. So the point is if you're coming down to my July 2017 expat insider seminar While you're down you can sign the paperwork and apply it for your permanent or temporary residency That'll save the expense of taking more time off in the future getting hotels Airline tickets and all the other things you'll have to plan if you're gonna come down So be smart about if you're coming down to the expat insider seminar You'd be selling yourself short if you didn't apply for your residency at the same time But remember it'll take you about a month to get your paperwork together up in the state where you live Like your police or sheriff's good conduct report that you'll have to get certified and authenticated in the state where you live There are some steps you have to go through and it takes about a month So if you're gonna apply for residency at the same time as you come down to the seminar

[05:35] You don't want to wait till the last minute Anyway, once you sign up for the seminar You'll be getting all the information on how that process goes and what you'll have to do to get your residency So why am I pushing Guatemala for residency? Well, it may sound like it I'm just mentioning it because it's so easy to obtain at least for now There are a half dozen or more other Latin countries that also fit the bill nicely However, Guatemala has one huge advantage, but I think it's gonna go away pretty soon that is you only have to be in the country one day a year to maintain your residency and most people don't realize how Valuable that little point is until they've applied for residency in another country like Nicaragua Costa Rica Panama in fact more than three-quarters of Latin countries You have to be in that country from three to six months a year to maintain your residency and get this in some Latin countries

[06:25] Believe it or not. You have to ask for and obtain government permission to leave So as to maintain your residency while you're gone and though almost all residencies in Latin countries will lead to nationality and Passport after five years or so you have to maintain your residency in good standing during that five-year period And if you stay out of the country just one day more per year than the allowable period Well, you have to reapply and the clock starts all over again The entrance and exits stamps on your passport will tell it all in fact You know a few cases where that's happened and believe me. It's a very frustrating and aggravating experience when that happens Now I've heard gringo say well, you know in places like for example Nicaragua. They're flexible about that Sure, you're supposed to remain in the country at least 90 days a year, but gringos will tell you well

[07:15] They don't hold hard and fast to that rule. Uh-huh How about three or four years from now? Remember those exit and entrance stamps are permanently stamped in your passport So again Guatemalan is one of the only Latin countries left where you only have to be in the country one day a year to maintain that residency and then after five years with permanent residency you get your passport and citizenship and those rules no longer apply because now you're a 100% Guatemalan citizen and once you've got it It can't be taken away or revoked unless you do something really stupid like commit an act of espionage Against your new country or commit treason. Yeah, right double-o seven. That's the plan Oh and the other big advantage Guatemalan residency has is that you don't have to get an FBI report?

[08:01] Like you do for almost all other Latin residency programs now. I predict that's gonna change soon, too So as it stands then what does that mean? That means you just go down to your local County Sheriff's Office and pull that report in one day However with most other residency programs You gotta send your fingerprints to the FBI and request a personal background check which usually takes three weeks to a month But I've known cases where it's taken three months So again, the sign-up sheet is ready for my July 2017 Latin insider seminar and along with that You've got the opportunity to kill two birds with one stone So I advise you if you're serious about that plan B and eventually voting with your feet You can get started by going to www.thenewxpat.com and clicking on the seminar link

[08:48] By the way for all you past insider seminar attendees who like to be repeat offenders, you know, we do get repeat offenders In fact, I've had some seminar attendees come down get this four different times some three times and others twice So you might wonder why so many people re-up like that Well, I guess you'll just have to come down and see for yourself Hmm, maybe it's because repeat offenders know they automatically get a thousand dollars off the seminar price Oh, and by the way, the seminar sign-up sheet reflects the early bird discount price Which on June 1st will revert back to the normal price All right, since earlier we were talking about airplanes and airports just recently quite a few people have sent me this link and they're worried It's an article that starts out by saying for 15 years

[09:37] Airport security has become more invasive Then the author says on my latest US flight to Mexico all of us passengers were presented with something We'd never seen before we'd been through the usual boarding pass checks passports scanners and pat-downs But this time it was different halfway down the jet bridge. There was a new layer of security There were two US Marshals heavily armed and dressed in dystopian style black reggae They stood next to an upright machine with a glowing green eye Every passenger one by one was told to step on a mat and look into the green scanner It was doing a retinal scan scanning our eyes and matching that scan with the passport which was also scanned yet again So what was my choice? Really? He says if I refused well, no flight then right

[10:25] But I did notice that every one of us was a bit shaken by the experience From what I could see it was a first for everyone Anyway, the article goes on saying what a invasion of privacy that is. Of course it is. So bottom line That's what we're all looking forward to in the future Anyone flying out of the US that is so are you okay with that? Well to me it's just one more reason added to the menu that you need a plan B and it's time to vote with Your feet and now I understand it's happening at certain European airports, too And I know for a fact it's happening at Tukeman Airport in Panama In fact the last two times I went through I not only got shoved into a line where we all had to give up our Fingerprints on one of those digital scanners They also made us stare into a camera for digital photos and by looking at the sophistication of the equipment I can only assume they were doing a retinal scan there, too

[11:12] And that was about a year ago, so you bothered by that you're scared yet. You should be okay now Let's skip to an email. This one's from max. He says good morning, Johnny. I've been listening for two years now I'm a couple episodes behind, but I never miss your show in fact in the episode I was listening to yesterday You said you've never heard anything too bad about those sketchy looking point of use water heater shower heads Alright, let me step a second to refresh your memory on those hot water shower point of use electric heaters if you remember I mentioned that probably only two percent of all Latin homes have Central hot water heating and about 25% of Latin homes have no hot water at all They're plumbed just with cold water and about 50% or more of Latin's have hot water, but only at the shower head

[12:00] There are little electric add-on units that turn on as soon as the water pressure comes and they're dangerous and even scary looking in General why because almost all of them have thick electric wires hanging from them Yep, water water everywhere, and you don't expect electric wires Do you and they're right on top of the shower head about a foot from your own head? Dangerous-looking. Yes. Do you get shocked once in a while? Yes But like I said in the past you have never read or heard about anyone getting electrocuted by one of those things Everybody gets shocked though By the way Almost all middle-class Latin homes have them and you can nearly always find them in one and two star hotels and backpacker hostels, too So you'll see them everywhere That means if you're invited to stay over at any Latin person's house

[12:45] You're bound to encounter one of those things Eventually and as for me even if I turn the water on and no hot water comes at all And that's probably what's gonna happen half the time There is a switch or a series of switches on each of those little shower heads My advice no matter how cold the water is coming out. Don't be tempted to go for any of those switches It's not recommended. So if hot water comes up, okay, if it doesn't well Just grin and bear it and don't tap twist or jolt a thing cuz it'll jolt you right back You'll know what I mean when you see one of these things up front and personal Anyway, the email goes on to say well Johnny Here's the story of my first interaction with one of those things I moved to panda Blanca Honduras to teach English in 2014 the house The school put us in did not have hot water

[13:33] Hmm exactly as I mentioned, huh? Anyway, Max says they quickly installed a point-of-use shower head for all of us teachers the warm water was great But every time we turned it on we'd receive a shock from the handle So we just to try to turn it on and off as quickly as possible Then he says the management finally sent someone to fix it after getting manana to death for a week or so Their idea to fix it the first time was wrapping electrical tape around the handle in an attempt to break the circuit They were scared to test it themselves. So I had to be the test monkey surprise surprise. I still got shocked Somehow they fixed it so the handle wouldn't shock us, but it wasn't fixed all the way

[14:19] Now you see if you leaned into the small shower and accidentally touched a wall you also received a shock Maybe this was their way of waking us all up. They never fixed this electrical problem, by the way Not to mention he says the wires hanging above the shower head would start to smoke if you took a shower longer than two minutes They eventually cut on fire one time while I was showering which got me jumping out of the shower Soapy and naked to my roommate's surprise They eventually installed a real hot water heater in that house just after I moved out So that's my story of one of those electrical point-of-use hot water heaters. You spoke about a while back By the way, Johnny, he says I emailed you a while back about your water filter system And I'm glad to say I'm finally making it happen

[15:06] My brother and I are driving my Jeep from South Carolina to Honduras and I'm loading it up with goods. It's a 2009 Jeep I've read that your vehicle is supposed to be seven years or less old in order to import it It used to be ten years in Honduras and recently they changed it to seven years I've been an owner of this vehicle since I bought it new in 2009 he says Johnny Do you know of any contact or lawyer in Honduras that deals with this kind of thing and the advice would be appreciated? Anyway, sorry for the long email Johnny. Love your show. It's been super helpful and informative for the couple of years I've been listening. Thanks for everything Max Alright a couple things here about Max's email. Number one. I did give him a contact for a lawyer in Honduras

[15:51] I'm pretty well connected down here and when you need a lawyer from whatever country I could usually shag one up one That's not a ripoff doesn't give you gringo prices and is not a crook, which is really the most important thing By the way, they're all pretty slow. They operate on manana time. You should know that by now In fact over the years, I have recommended lawyers and occasionally people will come back to me and say Johnny But you know, the guy's not getting anything done. He's way too slow And I say go ahead change lawyers and guess what? Inevitably every single time the person comes back to me and says, you know what? I got another guy, but he's even worse. He's slower and I have to train him up Well, that's Latin America and you just have to get used to the fact that lawyers are always on manana time So basically the number one most important thing and when selecting a lawyer is getting an honest one

[16:41] Difficult thing to do to her too, but I've been down here long enough to have made the acquaintance of a couple of very honest lawyer Unfortunately again, every one of them's on manana time. So get used to it. So what's that like? Well when they say they're gonna send you an email in two days Double that or triple that when they say they're gonna phone back by six. It'll be six tomorrow or the next day Hey, I can't tell you how many times I've been through this conversation with uptight. I want it now even pushy gringos Hey, I was like that the first couple years. I was down here, too But believe me no amount of pushing or screaming or aggravation is gonna get your lawyer or anyone else down here to move any faster Now you longtime listeners might remember when I told you I hired a pretty good architect Young guy right out of school and I said if you get the project done by so-and-so date a date by the way

[17:28] He selected himself and I said well if you get it done by that date, I'll give you a $2,500 bonus and guess what he tried a little harder than he probably would have normally with that carrot dangling in front of him Like that, but he never made the deadline a finished date He selected himself and you know up in the states money is the number one incentive to get things done faster or at least on time And down here well, there's no guarantee. It'll work that way It seems Latins aren't stressed at all by deadlines because they rarely keep them Why do you think the phrase manana time is so popular for example? If your mechanic says the car will be done on Wednesday figure Friday if you have a party or a get-together You need to tell everyone to be there by 4 figure 5 30 or 6 And of course all the gringos and expats will show up on time as well as the German expats

[18:16] In fact, they'll be an hour early, which is why some of us know better And if it's a 4 o'clock event, we'll put down 3 on the invitation and they'll still be late In fact, I went to a garden wedding not so long ago We're supposed to start at 4 in the afternoon and the bride did not get there till 6 30 And of course Latin guests they showed up late and us gringos were saying hey bad news Looks like she backed out a no-show But no the phone calls came in every half hour saying no She was still getting her hair and her nails and her pedicure done at the beauty parlor Meanwhile, everyone was sucking up the booze and the goodies at the party She rolled in two and a half hours late big sigh of relief by the gringos But the Latin say it didn't bat an eye Now you know up in the states if the brides even a half an hour late people start freaking out and an hour late

[19:04] Well, it's over. She's not coming. Everyone's going home, but back to Max's email He talks about bringing his car down and that to bring one into Honduras It can't be more than seven years old now just a few years back all Latin countries Let you import a car no matter how old it was, but slowly but surely even maggot-brained politicians Started to realize old junks on the road are not good for the country. They pollute their eyesores and they're dangerous So laws are being passed limiting the age of the vehicle you can import into a Latin country That sounds good at first glance doesn't it but meanwhile you can drive practically anywhere down here blowing smoke With broken mirrors and shattered windshields busted headlights and taillights. So what's the point?

[19:51] So anyway max says he did his stint in Pena Blanca Honduras That's a small town by the way of about maybe 35,000 people and I can only imagine that teaching job He's talking about is part of some religious mission or NGO project Since if you've ever been to the place, you'd know they've got no helicopter private schools there Hey, don't get me wrong any English teaching job down here nothing wrong with that But this town it's way off the gringo tourist trail and out in the boonies And if you're looking for gated guarded first-world style subdivisions, you're not gonna find them there You have to go about an hour's drive to San Pedro Sula That's a big city of almost a million and you can find almost anything there However, like any big city in Latin America San Pedro Sula has its very bad sections and very nice ones, too

[20:38] So you have to know your way around However, smaller cities like Pena Blanca Honduras can be perfect for people who want to live the slow easy life Like it was back in the 60s and 70s in the States things happen slow there Everybody's friendly, but there's not a lot to do either which suits some gringos and expats just fine Because for some of us doesn't matter where we are we find lots of things to do on our own way But back to that showerhead business I mentioned in the show a long long time ago that almost all of Latin America is still wired electrically with a two-wire system a Hot and a neutral usually designated black and white or red and white as the electric wiring color codes Go, you know white is supposed to be neutral and red or black 110 or 120 volts you'll find down here in Latin America almost all houses and buildings built more than 20 years ago

[21:30] Do not have a green ground wire or three prong outlets Just the typical old-fashioned two-pronged outlets that your old grandmother even your mother used to have in that house That was built in the 50s or during the Depression Of course all u.s. Structures were forced a long time ago to switch to a three-wire system with a dedicated ground However, most Latin buildings except for the very new ones are still two-wire systems Which accounts for so many shocks at those shower heads Because you see to avoid that the shower head should have a green wire attached to the base that goes to earth ground That earth ground would be a copper rod shoved deep into the ground where the green wire ultimately terminates Of course that round center terminal on each wall receptacle

[22:17] Eventually terminates at that same copper rod in the ground Now it surprises many people these days is that many electronic appliances don't use the ground anymore They just got two prongs most of the time they can be inserted either way Someday if I have enough time I'll explain why and it's only the heavier-duty household items that use a three-prong system Like washers dryers refrigerators garbage disposals, etc. Now throughout the world It's mandatory that bathrooms and kitchens have the three-prong system, too However, since there's no enforcement of that here in Latin America except in new buildings anything goes You may see three-prong outlets and bathrooms and kitchens, but you'll never see those ground fault interrupters You know called GFI's the outlets with the little red and black push button on them that you see in the bathrooms up in Seattle

[23:05] And Cleveland where you live that's code up in the States and believe me when a house is built Inspectors will make sure those things are in place whereas down here in Latin America No one not even most electrical contractors know what a ground fault interrupter is Even though these days when you buy a cheap hairdryer, they've got a ground fault interrupter integrated right into the plug You ladies out there know what I'm talking about. You've seen that though. You probably don't know what it's there for Well, that's your failsafe mechanism. If you drop it into the bathtub or in a sink full of water Anyway, Max's story kind of tells it all and still after telling us he and his roommates were shocked over and over Again by this thing. No one was killed or seriously injured yet. They kept using it Now I'd never want to have one of those things in a house of mine

[23:52] But just remember you're gonna run into those things and you're gonna be staying at people's houses and visiting and you just might get Shocked once in a while. So yes, you can be afraid but they're not nearly as dangerous as they look now I don't know if that gives you any comfort or not By the way I think the only reason more people don't get seriously injured or even killed is because only one in 50 Latin households has a bathtub Everyone takes showers almost no one takes baths and electricity and bath water don't mix All right, that's I'd like to make a little comment here that might shake people up a little bit With the way things are going up in the states There are tons of first-world people trying to get their plan B off the ground But it also seems that people always want expert advice for nothing And you know what they say you get what you pay for, right?

[24:40] I don't know what it is. But every time I open up my email box I get an email or two or ten from people asking me to perform the impossible Well better you hear this email. It's a perfect example. So here goes. Hi, Johnny. Let me tell you a little bit about myself I'm 42 years old an IT specialist. I hate what's happening up in the States It's gonna crumble and I want out I've been to Latin America But only to the tourist places like Cancun and stuff and I just know once I get down there I'll have a lot of great ideas So Johnny that said I'm gonna take a week or two and come back down to Latin America this time off the gringo Tourist trail like you recommend and I want to make it worth my while. I don't want to waste my time So Johnny, could you tell me which country and city in particular? I should concentrate on

[25:27] I've only got a week or two and I want to make it worth my while Thanks. I appreciate it Klaus Okay, that's a real example of many of the emails I get now Let me ask you this what if someone from Europe sent you an email like that and said I'm planning on moving to the United States I can't stand it in Europe anymore. I'm 42 years old. I'm an IT guy I've only been to the States once on vacation. I went to Disneyland in Las Vegas So what region state or city in the US do you suggest I go to make my next two-week? Vacation the most worthwhile for me and my plan B. Hmm. Do you get what's happening here? How would you answer that? Well, I'll tell you how I answer emails like that I send him a copy of the questionnaire I send out to people who I do phone

[26:15] Consults with that way I can collect a lot of information a lot of pertinent details their needs once hobbies habits Strengths weaknesses and their financial situation and sometimes most importantly what kind of baggage they have real estate kids debts parents in a nursing home Whatever then and only then after going through that questionnaire and spending a half an hour or an hour on the phone or Skype Can we together work out the details of your wants and needs? So if you're thinking about voting with your feet or you've got that plan B in motion You can throw darts at a map But I prefer to make a study out of it first off You'll need to write down and analyze some vital pieces of information. So if you send me an email The expat file said gmail.com. I'll send you my questionnaire the one I use to analyze each person's

[27:05] Situation as they move along in their plan B and even if you don't set up a Skype or phone consult with me It'll give you a good idea of all the things you need to be thinking about Now going beyond that to really kick your plan B into high gear There's my expat essentials course and believe me There's nothing out there like it if you're having any doubts as to how to get your own plan B underway Just go to expat plan B comm and you'll hit the ground running South of the border This is the expat files living in Latin America If you want me to help you out with your own plan B Just schedule a one-on-one consult send me an email the expat files at gmail.com And if you want to learn how to move forward with your own plan B from right up there in the states go to

[27:51] www.xpatplanb.com and check out my three videos. See ya nos vemos