#823 – The Expat Files: Connectivity, Politics, and the Irony of Regulation

Automatically transcribed from the original recording; names and wording may contain errors.

[00:00] South of the border down Mexico way That's where I fell in love when the stars above came out to play and now I wonder Hello there all you expat wannabes. I'm Johnny Mueller and you're listening to the expat files living in Latin America The show that tells you just what it's like to live work play and or retire down here in Latin America It's a mix of the good the bad the ugly and the great and it's all right here. So let's get started All right. Let's talk about some very weird expat Experiences, you know, they happen all the time. So I guess you can't call them too weird then and if they're frequently occurring Let's just call them then out of the ordinary ordinary expat experiences. Anyway, I'm in this taxi the other day in Panama

[00:48] And I was talking with the guy in Spanish, of course about internet connectivity and cell phones in Panama This guy was talkative. So I got a lot out of him I asked a guy about gringles who are just coming down for a short while and What they could do to buy a plan or some kind of pay-as-you-go Internet service for the computer and maybe you know hooking up Wi-Fi for your telephone, whatever because these days, you know You don't need roaming so much like you did before that is roaming when you're bringing your phone to other countries So with all the competition and choices, what's the best options for gringles and expats down for a short term? Let's say a week a month couple of months or even longer Although funny enough and what a coincidence I was in the Panama Airport took a month and I saw a big sign there

[01:36] It said Claro, which is really the biggest phone company in all Latin America and it serves the US and Canada, too I think it's something like 26 countries. When do I like the company Claro? Well, I certainly don't like the owner He's kind of a despicable guy. You may have heard of him and I've mentioned him before Carlos fat boy sim or some say Carlos fat boy slim Which is just the opposite of an aptonym because he's a bulbous bowling pin looking guy You know what an aptonym is, right? That's when you're given name. You're up a year. Oh in Spanish That's your last name is coincidentally similar or aptly suited to your profession or your look or your demeanor Whatever, for example, if your surgeon's name is dr. Cutter That's an aptonym or if you're a short fat ugly billionaire

[02:26] Megalomaniac like Carlos slim or sim whatever you like to call him That's an aptonym. Oh and why am I coming down so hard on this guy? Well, he's kind of a George Soros of Latin America Hmm that should conjure up an image for you Funny enough everyone in Latin America knows something about this guy They know who he is because he's got such power But I haven't met a single person who likes him who thinks they can trust him Who'd invite him to their daughter's quinceaños party? Well, maybe if he paid for it, I think that says it all Anyway, the phone companies here in Latin America are getting so competitive You see science and ads and competition everywhere, which is great And it seems all the internet services work. Well enough you get the speed and the download maximums as promised

[03:16] Because they are after all using first world equipment, but this is Latin America So there's one other thing you can always count on crappy or intermittent customer service That's a given and I guarantee there'll be times you get really pissed off and you want to blow your stack But I just recommend take a few deep breaths and plan on the fact that whenever they screw up your bill or your service Whatever you're gonna lose a morning or afternoon hashing and out in their local business office, but I digress. Where are we? Oh, yeah I'm in the airport and there's this big sign that says Claro now has free roaming in all 20-something countries that it's in it includes most all of Latin America Canada the US and most of the Caribbean islands, too Which is you know a gigantic selling point if you travel a lot?

[04:04] Internationally it is which most people don't do especially Latinos and when they do it when they have done They always look for a Wi-Fi signal so they can get on to what's up Talked a lot about that in the previous show, you know, because it's internet based chat voice audio Whatever you want it to be so you don't even have to have a phone service or a data plan Just a somewhat smartphone. So anyway, just keep that in mind if you come to Latin America Hey, you buy a Claro chip for three bucks and get like a hundred minutes of free phone time and you get free roaming in 20-something countries Whereas most people coming down from the states with their phone or sign up for roaming and pay extra for that You guys and gals traveling south from up in the states know that drill. It's usually a daily fee for roaming But where were we? Oh, yeah talking to the taxi driver about what would be the best internet data plan service

[04:55] Whatever if you were coming down to Panama or practically any country in Latin America and you know taxi drivers are the perfect people to ask those kind of questions because they're on a tight budget and Of course, they're always using ways Google Maps and the uber guys the uber app So it's only natural. They'll use the most cost-effective and well connected and stable internet plan. That's available So when I brought that up to the guy he smiled He said look at this and he pointed down to the council, you know between the two bucket seats And he showed me a little cigarette pack size modem. Actually, it was much thinner than a cigarette pack But square like that he had a charging He said it had a battery and it could go without a charge for something like five or six hours And he said he no longer had phone services at all

[05:42] He was doing everything through ways and what's up using just a data plan and that modem in his case He was using a movie star modem Though he said all the cell phone and internet service provider companies in Panama will sell you their version of that modem I think there's four companies and he said as usual you could sign up with an 18 month contract But you need credit references and bank accounts and stuff Or you can pay as you go or pay ahead called a prepaid service where there's no contract now This guy didn't have a contract. He was pay as you go Meaning he had to buy a little apparatus which is around 40 bucks. Then it's yours. You own it However, if you buy a contract plan, he says they give it to you for nothing He just pay monthly at one of the little kiosks or they'll deduct it directly from your bank account

[06:29] But you see a contracts for 18 months Now this guy was paying around 20 bucks a month to have Wi-Fi everywhere He just carried that little modem around with him everywhere He went and he recharged it through his USB adapter connected to a cigarette lighter in his car So if you ran into that guy in a supermarket hardware store at the beach, he'd have that little thing very nearby Usually in his front pocket next to the family jewel Nope, not a very good idea Since that kind of cell phone radiation is known to cause inflammation of the male epididymis cells In other words, it could screw up your reproductive process, which might be a good thing here in Latin America Hmm since the sperm count with North Americans is way down historically with Latin American males still shooting

[07:21] 357 Magnum so to speak could be that cell phone or modem in the pocket technique is the great equalizer Hmm that unpeasy enough for you By the way here in Latin America, most women carry their cell phones in their back pockets or in the bra Also, not a very good idea at all So anyway, I said to this guy. Is that the latest greatest modem? Are you taxi drivers all using it now? Hell? He says you get complete Wi-Fi internet service and if you have a computer you can connect that too And I'm thinking Wow an unlimited data plan for something like 20 bucks a month So bringing that idea full circle That's what you ought to do if you go to Panama Honduras any Caribbean Ireland Costa Rica

[08:07] Whatever go down to one of the cell phone companies and buy yourself one of those little motives and guess what? You don't have to be a resident. You just show me passport Photoshop maybe I'm not recommending that just telling you what a lot of student expats do just stay off the radar And now you got internet everywhere. You don't have to worry about being in some Wi-Fi hotspot You are the Wi-Fi, but do try to keep the damn thing away from your Wavos Oh and the speeds well, they've got two five and ten megabytes and now with those free roaming plans You can go from country to country and use the same device At least that's with the promo pamphlets and signs and ads are saying though. I haven't tried that yet myself Meanwhile back in the taxi conversing with the driver. I found out a few more things

[08:53] I said to him I just can't believe how the internet and telephone services have changed for the better of course over just the past few years He said man, you can say that again in Spanish, of course Then he admitted almost with a little shame in his voice He said, you know, it's embarrassing to say but I was one of those idiots that took the street Painted signs got involved in the roadblocks and picketed government buildings when the government announced it was gonna sell off Certain cell phone bandwidths and the national phone company. He said we were all shocked by that announcement Thinking as usual only the politicians were gonna benefit from that. So people protested everywhere He said me included and looking back. It was a dumb thing to do

[09:42] Do you know he said just a few years ago when the government owned pretty much the only cell phone company that existed in Panama At the time we thought going down and signing up to get a cell phone That would take two or even three months to get was a huge improvement over a year or two to get a landline some years before that and he said when we found out The government was gonna sell off a piece of it to Claddow Tigo Mobystar and some of the others We took to the streets set up roadblocks and shut down some of the roads for a couple of days Because the government unions and activists were telling us that once private companies come in Prices would rise for telephones and they'd lay off thousands of government telephone workers Scared the hell out of us really he said the union guys and activists were saying that the government has no business

[10:33] Selling off our national patrimony here We all thought that since the government owned the phone company for a hundred years or so They had no right to sell it off to a private party. But what did we know? Then he shook his head again and said boy were we uninformed even stupid just the opposite happened He said now that the big international companies came in and bought some of the telephone spectrum, etc You walk into one of their offices and you've got the phone. It's all programmed You're online in less than an hour and in the end He said our telephone and utility workers didn't lose their jobs They just got shuffled around into different parts of the industry not to mention He said the three or four phone companies down here have a kiosk on practically every corner and that stuff didn't even exist before

[11:22] Those are all brand new jobs. And then you've got on every couple of street corners the phone repair shop So here I was stuck in a taxi tuck into a pretty intelligent taxi driver He was a thoughtful guy who figured out for himself. Just why socialism does not work in his own country He got a little taste of both ends of it. Yeah, Venezuelan Cuba came up in the conversation We were in the huge traffic jam by the way So we had a lot of time to talk Yeah As it turns out I'd say about a half to a third of all Latinos and Latinas here in Latin America have a friend relative acquaintance Whatever who came from Cuba or Venezuela, you know, Venezuelans are flooding into all the Latin American neighboring countries And isn't it funny when you talk to someone who actually knows someone from Cuba or Venezuela? They hate or at least distrust

[12:09] socialism and government big-brother control But the other half of Latinos and Latinos who have no friends and relatives from Venezuela or Cuba They're the ones that are willing to give it a try because the theme is take from the rich and give to the poor Free stuff for everyone and all that, you know It's always been easy to pit the haves against the have nots and one of the oddest things is that for such a Christian culture Nobody seems to read their Bible where Jesus said and you can look it up. The poor will always be with us Hey, I'm no Bible thumper, but I went to Catholic school and I do remember that though on the flip side It seems like most Latinos and Latinas who have some initiative and creative energy They want nothing to do with socialism like for example that taxi driver

[12:57] He owned his own taxi in that regard He told me only probably one in 50 taxi drivers in Panama City own their own cab the rest He said rent their taxis daily weekly or monthly from one of the big companies that owns a fleet of cars and the drivers They pay anywhere from 10 to 15 bucks a day for the privilege of driving a cab turns out That's traditionally how the taxi business has gone down in Latin America Most guys just rent those things and they're only other expenses gas money And now that uber and all the other ride-sharing services have arrived here in Latin America, man That's yet another wrench thrown into the works. Oh, and it's the same thing with Airbnb That's a wrench into the works of the traditional hotel tourism scenario, too Alright, speaking of government protests big brother. I'd like to say a word or two about the longest-standing government shutdown in US history

[13:51] Well, first of all, I'm with the founding fathers on the notion that a government that governs best governs least and that's certainly an anathema to the way the government runs today and Our brilliant founding fathers said the government should have very limited powers Including to keep the peace protect the borders and provide stable and sound money for commerce In other words have a stable monetary system and a fair judicial system to settle disputes, etc Oh for the good old days, huh as far as this government shutdown business I've been seeing the phrase over and over again in the media Quote the government has been forced to discontinue all non-essential services Hmm, duh. Have you looked up the definition of non-essential lately? That means services that are not

[14:44] Necessary you get it non-essential equals not necessary Now who doesn't understand that so why would the US government a bankrupt government with a Over 20 trillion dollars in debt be involved with giving out non-essential services Obviously if they're not necessary get rid of them. That's why in most cases I personally have no sympathy for people who work for government sure I know if you're working for government and the checks aren't coming in because of the shutdown That's a terrible thing for you and your family But I'd say 95% of all the people in services in government are just basically Make work jobs that clog up and burden the lives of the rest of the working public

[15:30] Meaning people that produce goods and services that others actually want to buy but again I digress as usual. Sorry about that You know, occasionally I get into a discussion with a do-gooder or a person who's getting a US government pension You know, there are hundreds of thousands of expats living down here collecting a pension because they were US government school teachers They make up a huge chunk of the retired population mostly on the gringo tourist trail you run into them all the time and most of them when they started teaching many years ago They loved it and soon enough learned to hate it or hate the system and they just hung in there to wait out their retirement That's what I don't get they hate the system or what it's turned into

[16:15] But they're still mostly liberal Democrats. I don't get that as for me I'm an equal opportunity government hater Democrat or Republican But I'll tell you these teachers who've moved down here to Latin America They still think that if you vote the right person in up in the states, all will be saved the right Democrat person Now I'll tell you a good old expat Eddie hasn't surfaced for a while But I'll never forget the story he once told me about a friend of his in Texas Whose dad worked at an armaments factory and for some reason an old senator in the state died who was responsible For getting all those defense contracts and the factory got moved to another state When the congressman there had more pulling power Well, the factory moved some 600 people got laid off including Eddie's buddy's dad

[17:03] Then for a while the family was depressed and despondent But eventually the father got a new job making 12 bucks an hour instead of 20 and mom had to go back to work They got over it, but it hurt though They always talked about the good old days when dad worked at the armaments factory Get this who are making hand grenades landmines Detonator fuses and he said, you know It was a complete disconnect in that family for what daddy was really doing every day going to work Putting together hand grenades landmines and fuses with great pride So that as George Carlin would say Short brown people in another part of the world could get their legs hands and guts blown up and Eddie said there was something Tragically wrong about the fact that the family never balked about the way daddy earned his money

[17:50] Which is why I always say I don't know if there's a God, but I'm certain there is a devil now I know what you're thinking Johnny's gone off his rocker. What's that got to do with teachers in Latin America? Well, I was talking to a couple of them who've started an investment club here in Latin America Expat teachers that is and they along with their teachers pension plans have a lot of their dough Invested in the armaments industry. Mmm. Oh the irony, huh? Which brings us back to the subject of airports. We weren't talking about airports, weren't we? Anyway, we're all aware. They have some very strange TSA rules these days But do you know the rule for lithium batteries? I mean everything's got lithium batteries in it these days computers cellphones flashlights

[18:38] Xboxes electric toothbrushes blackhead removers. Yep rechargeable portable blackhead sucking machines Just saw one the other day In fact, I was sitting next to a lady on the airplane It was grossing me out with one of those things or should I say one of those suckers and you frequent travelers out there Know that once you're on a plane, especially if it's full and you're stuck sitting next to someone like that Along with all the other stressors that go along with flying man It will not be a good day Of course as for me I'd much rather be next to someone sucking out their blackheads than someone with Intolerable bad breath and or BO to me that's tantamount to a criminal offense I mean, come on Whatever happened to airplane etiquette and I really think along with the first class section on a plane

[19:25] They ought to have a halitosis and generally Disgusting person section on each plane, you know a place to put whiny kids and people so fat the armrests Disappear when they sit down then there's that guy. It's always a guy Forever blown his nose hacking all the time spitting up phlegm man That's disgusting. And of course, we'll save a few spots for everyone who's got three or more face piercings Anyway, that's what I'd do if I owned an airline but back to bringing items with lithium batteries on airplanes Here's the new rule on flights If you check any airlines hazardous material web page all your lithium batteries and apparatus With lithium batteries have to travel with you in your carry-on luggage. Now, that's a bit counterintuitive You think well if batteries are dangerous because that's what it says on their website

[20:16] Wouldn't you want them isolated in the cargo hold in case they explode or leak? Well, as it turns out a few a very few lithium batteries actually froze in a cargo hold Expanded and leaked and now we've got these grand new rules. We all have to follow I mean look who hasn't left a couple of AA batteries or their electric toothbrush in their checked luggage That's all rechargeable lithium battery stuff, but it's against airline rules and regs to do that So then you might ask if you're a frequent flyer or let's say you have a vacation home in Cancun Wouldn't you like to fly down with some power drills or saws if you feel like doing a little handiwork around the beach house? Well these days almost all decent power equipment drills jig saws

[21:03] Whatever even chainsaws believe it or not are powered by lithium batteries And you really have to watch out how you ship that stuff for they'll take it away from you at TSA And you'll never get it back. Oh and get this a very cool guy who came down to my recent expat insider seminar told me He has a friend who was selling Swiss Army knives for I think he said a buck apiece He bought him He said from a guy who worked at TSA who had a little bag full of hundreds of little confiscated Swiss knives And you wonder where that stuff ends up well wonder no more now imagine how many hundred and fifty dollar Bosch power Drills have been confiscated that way well You don't want that to happen to you, and it will unless you adhere to the following rules quite closely All right suppose you've got a nice power drill with an extra battery inside its original case to get it through

[21:54] Here's what you have to do you have to take the drill and the drill bits and accessories and store them in the checked-in luggage But first you have to remove the batteries Then you wrap the batteries contacts with masking tape packing tape or duct tape In other words the contacts cannot be exposed however That's kind of stupid because if you know anything about battery operated construction equipment You know the contacts are never exposed The batteries are made with quick disconnects so they can be moved back and forth to the charger So when you pull the battery off the contacts are always hidden below a spring-loaded plastic trapdoor So you can't see him, but you got to wrap the battery anyway That's what airline hazardous material websites say according to TSA rules

[22:42] Then you got to put each battery into its own hermetically sealed plastic see-through Ziploc type bag and that goes with your carry-on luggage Into the cabin of the plane with you by the way if you have a decent power drill you know the detachable batteries about as big as a small jar of Peanut butter and airline and TSA regs say you can't have any more than two of those batteries with you in your carry-on luggage Oh, and as far as double-a and triple-a Rechargeable batteries for your toothbrush shaver vibrator nose hair rotor rotor whatever well according to airline regs again You can only have the batteries that are in the unit and two extra ones in your carry-on luggage

[23:28] Again that makes no sense because if you look at those batteries for drills, and they allow two of them Well just compare them to the size of a double-a or triple-a battery and man It's like talking elephants and oranges But no matter that kind of craziness is to be expected when the government steps in and with a heavy hand starts Regulating things oh even more importantly your batteries cannot be rated at more than a hundred and sixty watts So what does that mean well if you look at any lithium-ion battery? It'll have an amp rating and a voltage rating on it almost never a wattage rating So you'll have to remember your third grade math. Let me give you a typical example suppose You got a power drill rated at three amps and 18 volts. You'll see right on it. It's pretty typical

[24:16] You might remember from eighth grade science. There's a thing called ohms law wattage which the maximum like I said is 160 watts is equal to voltage times amperage So you just multiply your two battery numbers together 18 volts times 3 amps. That's 54 watts about a third of the maximum 160 watt limit now the only time you can ever approach that limit is if you have a really big power tool like for example a Saw is all a chainsaw or a very big hammer drill But as for battery-operated tools the average consumer uses you'll almost never have a problem Except for the obvious problem that the government has imposed all kinds of stupid ass rules and regs Oh, and here's another thing related to that if you use one of those freight forwarding services

[25:04] I've spoken about those in detail many times before you know where you have a Miami box It's sent to Miami then it shipped to whatever Latin country you're in then you get charged by the freight forwarding company For the weight in pounds well these lithium battery regulations have affected them recently too because they're shipping all that stuff like Amazon Products by air in fact just recently I bought one of those heavy-duty flashlights That's got a taser built into it You know kind of hidden and when Amazon sent it to the Miami box to be freight forwarded to Central America I got a note from my freight forwarder saying it'll be a week late. All right a week. That's okay No problem, and when I went down to pick it up I thought uh-oh they know it's a taser and they're not gonna let it through

[25:49] But that wasn't the case at all the lady at the desk said anything that's got a rechargeable lithium battery And it is routed to a special cargo plane that takes off only once a week And that plane is loaded up with computers and everything that takes batteries, and it's pressurized like a normal cabin They don't as per TSA requirements allow lithium batteries to be flown in a non pressurized space All because of those two or three batteries out of millions or perhaps billions That expanded and leaked in a non pressurized cargo hold as a result. We now have the TSA battery police By the way as for the TSA Accumulating thousands of Swiss Army knives and who knows how many expensive power drills not to mention all the odd stuff

[26:38] Like bungee cords they take away when you're getting felt up during the pat down Wouldn't you like to know whose garage basement or attic all that stuff ends up in talk about hidden perks of the job? What a racket? That said before we sign off today I like to mention that I've been getting a slew of emails about healthcare and healthcare insurance here in Latin America So I think next show I'll fill you in with some stuff on that subject I'm sure you've never heard before Meanwhile if you want to bone up on what's happening with Latin American health care and how to get first world medical and dental treatment at third world prices Be sure to go to www.theexpatfiles.com Healthcare to pick up my very own hundred page Latin American health care report

[27:25] And on the next show we'll go into a little more detail and answer some questions about health care People have been shooting me emails about You've been listening to the expat files living in Latin America If you need some help with your own plan B You can schedule a one-on-one phone call with me But first download my free plan B questionnaire at www.thenewexpat.com Better yet if you want to get your plan B going from right up there in the states Just sign up for my 9-hour expat essentials course get the perfect plan B blueprint by going to the expatfiles.com Academy. Los bemos Go to www.theexpatfiles.com