#892 – The Expat Files: Cost of Living, Hygiene, and Cultural Insights in Latin America

Automatically transcribed from the original recording; names and wording may contain errors.

[00:00] South of the border down Mexico way That's where I fell in love when the stars above came out to play and now I wonder Hello there all you ex-pat wannabes. I'm Johnny Mueller and you're listening to the expat files living in Latin America The show that tells you just what it's like to live work play and or retire down here in Latin America It's a mix of the good the bad the ugly and the great and it's all right here. So let's get started All right, let's start the day off with a little cost of living off the gringo tourist trail reality check now You know pretty much anywhere you live in Latin America off the gringo tourists trailer on Every street corner seems to have a little kiosk where they're selling fruit vegetables junk food beer booze

[00:47] Recargas for cell phones, you know putting minutes or data time into your smartphone. That's really big down here now Since most Latinos and Latinas don't have a contract plan for internet phone or data They prepay as they go now I know that to you listeners up in the first world US Canada Europe, etc That sounds really strange because you're all on some kind of plan Well, that's something truly different about Latin America versus the first world that means if you come down with your own smartphone and don't have roaming you'll probably buy a chip here and Prepay the time as you go and practically all the little corner tienes will charge up like that as for me That's the way I do it for admittedly in some banks on and with the particular company I'm with for three bucks I can buy five days unlimited internet and data time and get three bucks worth of regular phone time, too

[01:36] That might last if you're calling in country, maybe an hour's worth of regular phone talk time So that means about every five days. Sometimes I go longer than that I go over to a little corner kiosk give the guy three bucks and I'm charged up again for five days So for three bucks, I get five days of unlimited internet and data time There are other plans you could select one day data time three days five days fifteen days But I did the numbers and the five day plan for me is the most economical So my kind of dumb smartphone, which by the way, it's not registered my name cost me about 18 bucks a month Sure, I can have a contract plan, but I don't want one Then you got to give up all that information data bank numbers the whole bit because they want to link it to a bank account To do a direct monthly deduction. I know that's the American way, but I don't go in for those things

[02:23] All right, just still worried about those corner tienes or kiosks It seems like every little corner kiosk you walk into there are homemade baked items right at the checkout counter now I very much doubt that city and health ordinances in any US or Canadian city would let you just put anybody's including the neighbor ladies Cakes cookies brownies jam, etc Along with some very unusual looking homemade edibles to in any store in the US Canada and the first world without violating a ton of city ordinances I mean look think of those nine-year-old kids that get busted in the states for having a lemonade stand on their front yard Without a permit but here in Latin America things are different no matter what little kiosk or corner store or hole in the wall You walk into you'll see homemade baked goods and custom-made odd looking sugary things for your sweet tooth

[03:12] And you might ask if I ever bought any that stuff. Hell no I'm sure a lot of it tastes great. Maybe even fantastic or it wouldn't be there and restocked day after day The fact is I've always been pretty cautious about hygiene and you longtime listeners to the show have heard me Say that I do not drink out of a glass unless I'm at a nice restaurant or at my own place And I refuse to put ice cubes in any of my beverages unless I've made the ice myself Why because I see how Latin Americans and their maids and cleaning ladies prepare stuff in the kitchen now You might think I'm finicky and going overboard a bit Captain Mango throws digs at me about that all the time Meanwhile at the seminar before last it was Captain Mango who had an all-night date in the bathroom with the porcelain goddess Not me. You also have to remember. I have not had a case of Montezuma's revenge for at least 10 years now

[04:02] Whereas for backpackers in the regular tourist crowd, it's kind of a rite of passage So it does pay to watch what you eat and be a little finicky And you know when you walk in a restaurant or in a restaurant's bathroom Whether the place is hygienic or not same is true when you're visiting someone's house or going into one of those corner kiosks or tandas I'm telling you many Latinos are clueless. They really really need to have a basic hygiene 101 course So in the end if you have a maid or cleaning lady, you're gonna end up being their teacher You're gonna show them how not to cross contaminate things For example, you're the one who's gonna have to teach them how not to use the same cleaning rag They use on the toilet that they use on the countertop and the floors a lot of that going around That's for sure and you're probably also gonna have to train them how to wash their hands thoroughly After touching raw chicken and how not to spread those raw liquids around and you're gonna have to show them how to use disposable paper

[04:54] Products too. Otherwise, you'll find they're using the same contaminated cleaning rags and mops over and over again But really in a lot of ways, it's not their fault Basically comes down to a water usage thing because in Latin America, there's a big shortage of fresh water Though not if you live in a gated guarded community or residential tower or in an upper middle class or wealthy suburb But as for middle class and lower middle class latins, which make up probably 80% of the population They're almost all on municipal water supplies. They don't have water 24-7 So they use much less than they accommodate and though it might appear that there's water 24-7. It's an illusion You see it's all about having a cistern underground or up on the roof That's collecting water at night when all are sleeping and usage is way down and that water during the day is kicked back in

[05:43] To the plumbing lines when the municipal water shuts off and that can happen multiple times a day So it appears like there's water 24-7, but only if you have a cistern So you'd think every Latino household would have one, right? But that's not true Very few lower middle class and poor Latinos probably half of the population have them why it's all about the dough Cost between three and five hundred bucks to get the pump in the plumbing and the cistern mounted and set up So they just put up with the daytime water outages. They're used to it So if you have a cistern in every gringo and expat really should that is if you plan to live in a Latino Subdivision that's on municipal water. If you don't you'll be sorry. So make sure you check it out before you rent Anyway, you'll find in houses that don't have cisterns

[06:29] The water pressure during the day could be very low at times coming out of the faucet Thickness of a pencil even less but when you think about it a little stream of water is better than no water at all and Sometimes with municipal water could be daily. The tap will be dry for hours at a time However, as mentioned you won't notice that if you have a cistern because it's got a sensor and kicks in when there is no water flow Or the pressure is way down So it's very important if you're renting or buying to ask the owner or the landlord if you've got water 24-7 and if you've got a cistern installed ask him how reliable the municipality is in delivery of the water Ask him what the water flow and pressure is like during the day and also remember he might say yeah We got water 24-7, but he's not telling you that it's coming from the cistern part of the time

[07:16] What you want to know is if there's water 24-7 coming out of the water main direct to your house Of course as mentioned before if you're in a private subdivision with its own well You'll have good water flow and pressure 24-7 even without a cistern That's almost always the case in subdivisions for the upper middle class and wealthy your colony colonial. That's what they call a subdivision down here or Housing development will have its own water and plenty of pressure 24-7 and will not at all be at the mercy of the large-ass bureaucrats at the municipal water supply because you will not be hooked up To their system. Oh, and by the way, I've seen some studies here and there that say that municipal water supplies throughout Latin America Are usually sized correctly for the given population and for population growth and they really should have water 24-7 But the problem again the endemic problem is maintenance

[08:04] Because it's been claimed over and over again that with all Latin American municipal water supplies up to 50% of the water is Lost completely wasted due to deteriorating underground pipes that are constantly leaking In fact, you can prove it to yourself practically every day of the week Just take a ride in your car through any big middle class or lower middle class residential area And tell me if you don't see some wet patches in the road or little streams of water from who knows where? Percolating up through the ground or running into a gutter now Of course that happens in cities up in the states in Canada and Europe, too But the difference is here in Latin America You could drive by that same spot a week later and still see the puddle or the wet patch Oh and another thing you'll find if you're living in a place where you use municipal water

[08:49] Well, they just might not be a cistern at all or you've got a very undersized one and really it's not the kiss of death But it will cost a few bucks to get a cistern or an upgrade Yep, most hardware stores have nice big cisterns available However, most Latinos with cisterns have bought undersized ones because they're cheaper the most common cisterns You see on rooftops hold about between a hundred two hundred gallons a bathtub and a half or two Well, that's okay and will work if your water goes out for three four hours a day But what if it goes out for an entire day or two days? I know that rarely happens But you have to anticipate that the future no matter where you are in the world is going to be a more hazardous Place to live in and more chaotic I mean, that's the reason why you have a plan B in the first place Right a plan B is nothing more than an insurance policy against the unknown

[09:37] Well, they call it the unknown anyway, but we know most things in the world are not getting better by any means They're deteriorating So for example in the case of a cistern if you've got a 200 gallon job That'll get you through all the normal ups and downs if you're on a municipal water supply in Latin America However, my suggestion is to get one that's four times as big and since most roofs in Latin America are concrete It can hold the weight now as to me. I'm an engineer and I like to over design things I have a cistern that's 20 times as big as the average cistern you see in Latin America on the roof Mine is an underground concrete cistern. It's actually under the garage slab holds about 5,000 gallons about 50 bathtubs worth of water now if the water were to be cut off completely a 5,000 gallon cistern could last a single person if he conserved and skimped three or four months

[10:26] Family of four a month or so and that's without collecting a single drop of rainwater Of course where I live I have a way of collecting rainwater right off the roof And if I pull a lever it goes directly into the cistern. It's a great self-sufficient setup better yet I'm in a big ecological subdivision that has its own well So a system like that's got everything good going for it But I'd be willing to bet practically no expats gringos or Latinos have such a system when you have water It's pretty steady. You just don't think about it, but you have to start somewhere starting with getting yourself an oversized cistern I'm not talking about one of those 55 gallon drum sized cisterns you see everywhere throughout Latin America There are really two things that don't like about rooftop cisterns one They're extremely ugly and two you can't catch rainwater because they're above the roof line by the way cistern in Spanish is cisterna

[11:17] They're called did not goes to let's see. Where was I going with this? Oh, yeah I was talking about cleaning ladies maids and regular Latin American housewives and Hygienic food preparation or lack of it I mentioned that you'll probably be appalled when you look at the way your cleaning lady prepares food and cleans the house You'll find out soon enough that you're gonna have to teach her only if you're thinking that all Latin Americans are Unhygienic for some reason or other or they've got really bad habits I wouldn't go that far and I wouldn't generalize because it really all depends on the availability of water in a particular household So for example, if you're upper middle class and you live in a residential tower with its own Pozo Oh well, it's called a Pozo down here Pozo rhymes with bozo Or if you're in a nice subdivision that has its own well

[12:03] Meaning the water pressure is high and it's flowing all the time people wash up more take more showers clean things more often And while they're more hygienic and it shows Especially when you consider the average American uses about a hundred gallons of water a day Whereas the average Latin American that would be middle-class lower middle class and poor that takes in about 90% of the population They're using about 25 gallons a day per person So naturally they skimp compared to first-world people on general cleanup showers and hand-washing And it's your job to break your maid or cleaning lady out of that habit Tell her she can use all the water she wants when it comes to cleaning things and washing up Oh, and there's another thing gringles and expats don't realize till they've come down here and actually live for a while You'll find if you're renting let's say in a middle-class Latin neighborhood

[12:50] You're on municipal water when the monthly bill comes you're gonna be shocked prepared to first-world prices. It's practically free I've been in many houses on municipal water and I've seen the bills lying around the house and man Can you believe a monthly water bill of a dollar fifty four or three dollars and sixteen cents? Hey, that's the range. Well, that's because almost all municipal water supplies in Latin America our government owned operated and subsidized Meanwhile, if you're in a residential tower subdivision that has its own Well, you'll pay the real price of what it takes to get the water out of the ground and maintain the pump and the cistern And stuff then your bill just might be 10 20 or even 30 bucks a month No government subsidy there and in reality That's why middle and lower middle-class Latinos get so upset and they go on well guys That means hit the streets and protests when they find out their government is thinking about

[13:38] Privatizing the water utility or privatizing anything for that matter. Why because they're addicted to the subsidies They know when things are privatized the price can often go up sometimes dramatically Of course, the glaring exception to that rule is when the telephone companies went private in that case prices dropped dramatically Anyway, when utilities privatize the public doesn't seem to care that service and quality will get infinitely better All they care about is the price and then you have the gringo do-gooders riling up the masses too They like to do that. It never fails two weeks later They're back at the health club in Minnesota full of themselves bragging They scored a victory for water as a human right? Meanwhile, their utilities in Minnesota are all privatized Hmm. So then what's the answer?

[14:24] Well, I don't know because the masses are so used to getting cheap subsidized water with the utility bleeding red ink all the time But it doesn't matter because it's government, right? Then you've got the case when you privatize and suddenly your water bill goes from two bucks to ten bucks Which is the real cost of getting clean water to the tap. Then people freak out. They go nuts They start writing then you've got the case of farmers living on little homesteads way out in the boonies They don't have municipal water and many of them don't even have wells They know that when it rains it rains like hell here in Latin America They collect rainwater or they pull it from a local river In fact, I can't tell you how many times have been way out in the boonies and I've seen 55 gallon drums positioned outside at a Strategic corner of the house collecting rainwater. In fact, I know an old farmer who does that got a couple horses driveway chickens

[15:12] Pretty good spread of land, but he does have a well, you know, one of those hand pump jobs That's about 20 feet off the back porch in a little shed. It's like a real flashback to depression era farming crazier yet This guy doesn't even have electricity even though the electric company is offered to bring it out to him and he's not biting He's in no hurry. Oh, and this guy's even got a plow horse Yep He hand plows his little field of corn and beans and you know way out in the boonies in Latin America His situation isn't that uncommon But I'd be willing to bet you will never find a guy in his situation up in the United States or Canada If you did he'd be on 60 minutes now This guy grows his own stuff and he makes some money selling some beans and corn when the crops are good But he makes most of his spending money by selling a kind of white cheese that his wife makes in the kitchen

[16:00] He sells the stuff to some of those little kiosks I was talking about early in the show now what that means is if the government would suddenly laid out some rules saying that You couldn't sell that kind of stuff in stores without certain permits and inspections. Well, that would sort of ruin this guy's lifestyle So that's another conundrum should governments lay down a bunch of hygienic standards and force people to get permits licenses and inspections Well, that's a hard one because when it comes to hygiene, there's got to be standards But when the government gets involved, well, as they say the road to hell is paved with good intentions. Now, where was I going with this? Oh, man. Did I digress? I started this little rant which turned into a big rant Intending to talk about the off the gringo tourist trail cost of living. So I'll lay this on you just a couple hours ago I was power walking and about three blocks from my place

[16:46] There's a little store and outside the place in the shade is a big bin full of mangoes So I picked out five each one of them about the size of a dinosaur egg Each one of them like a whole meal in itself and I grabbed five bananas to put into a smoothie later I have a smoothie every day with bananas and blueberries to mix in my powders and supplements for me It's about the only way to wash that stuff down. All right So, what do you think? What if five big dinosaur egg mangoes and five bananas cost? Oh, and by the way, there must have been a few hundred mangoes there Some of them soft and too ripe then some of them hard as a rock You know, lots of first world people think eating a mango is hard work First of all, they're loaded with sticky juice You get the stuff all over your hands and they've got that fiber that gets in your teeth And you got to floss it out or it's in there all day So that's the problem with mangoes

[17:32] However, about a year and a half ago an old latino taught me some mango tricks You're the thunk guy learned this stuff from cat mango, but not this time So here's what you do You don't want to choose a mango that's squishy on the outside like a rubber ball So you choose wanting to squeeze it hard if it doesn't have any give at all. It's not ripe But if it's got just the slightest little give but not mushy. That's perfect Then you take a very sharp knife You cut five equally spaced longitudinal lines in it from top to bottom Then you grab a tag of the skin on what would be the north pole if it was the earth And you peel off the skin with the knife like a banana But you just peel off the first two of the five sections Then you can eat the thing like an apple holding on to the skin that you haven't peeled off and biting into the meat

[18:17] And in that state it's not too hard or too ripe So the fibers won't separate and get in your teeth and man, you know that works So well, I eat one big dinosaur egg mango a day And since here in latin america, there are probably seven or eight different kinds of mangoes The gigantic ones aren't always in season, but there always seems to be mangoes around Now as far as mango juice, it's like orange juice. You have to have it freshly squoze or it's just not that good Oh, and if you don't like mangoes too sweet You can eat them like latin americans do hard like a hard pear And when they're hard like that the skin won't peel away like a banana You have to cut it away with a knife like you're peeling a potato and that's the way most latinos eat those mangoes When they're hard, they're not sweet. They're acidic and latinos put salt and some other condiments on them To me it's kind of a sin to eat them that way but to each of them

[19:04] Oh and here's a really important mango tip when you buy a mango Inspect it very carefully Don't ever buy one that's got a pinhole in it or even the slightest look that it may have been punctured in any way Now mangoes could have black and brown spots and scars on them That's not a problem as long as they're still hard and not soft if they're soft Underneath those spots and scars there could be lots of nasty mushy bruising Now the reason why you want to reject these things even if there's one tiny pinhole It's because certain kinds of disgusting insects love to burrow their way into those things including one particular kind of spider Enough said about that But back to the original question. I bet you thought we'd never get to it five dinosaur egg mangoes and five bananas What do you think that cost me at the local corner store? Would you believe 40 cents and now I can hear some of you listeners thinking johnny's gone off his rocker

[19:52] He's gone crazy spending way too much time talking about the lowly mango though. I wouldn't say that in front of captain mango Well, there's a reason for it because you know up in the states mangoes are very expensive and hard to come by In fact, I don't know of anybody up in chicago friends relatives neighbors Anyone that ever bought a mango too hard to transport therefore expensive, but as luck would have it They're everywhere here in latin america They're growing on trees right out in the streets and they're really great So i'm telling you right now take advantage of them. Even if you've never tried one before you'll see on that note Let's take an email This one's from kyle. He says johnny johnny johnny. What's wrong with kids today? I invited my two college kids a college by the way, which I pay an arm and a leg for To come with me on a whirlwind trip to honduras panama and guadamala

[20:41] They hemmed in hard and said they would go but only if I made a side trip to costa rica or con kun Because they said boring places like guadamala panama and honduras are not the usual places where college kids hang The thing is johnny. I want to come down and see latin america off the tourist trail like you've been talking about I've been wanting to do that for a long time But I need someone to come with me and the ex-wife Well, you don't bring your ex-wife and if you got two kids in college, you think that would be a great adventure for them But the truth is I just can't seem to get anybody to go with me and I don't like the idea of traveling alone Especially since I don't speak spanish signed kyle from detroit, michigan 54 years old. There's ps here He says johnny whether I make it down to latin america or not I will be signing up for your january or the next seminar If I can get one of my smartphone addicted sons to come down with me

[21:27] If not, you can hook me up with a roommate, right? All right, kyle. Yeah, I can probably hook you up with a roommate Now you want my opinion, right? Your first mistake is that you don't invite your kids anywhere If you're paying for their nice little lifestyle and their university you get to tell them where they're going To me, it's not a matter of negotiation You pay the bills you get to tell them what life's going to be like when they're living under your roof and not paying for it Hey, I know those are words people don't want to hear but those are pretty much the exact words My mother and father said to me when I was up on my high horse trying to rebel Only my parents never gave me an allowance bought me a car or paid for my college They still had their rules and as long as I was living under their roof. I had to follow them I know I know we're living in the 21st century and that's old-fashioned thinking, isn't it? Which begs the question

[22:14] What's wrong with kids today us old fogeys would say, right? Like our parents said about us and their parents said about them Well, let's just talk for a second how things have changed like my 26 year old nephew with rich doctor parents Who crashed three of their cars and totaled them? Lost a number of jobs because he just can't seem to wake up before nine in the morning Turns out their working hours are just not attuned to his schedule Oh and he's the kid who told his grandmother my mother That he doesn't really need a job or a career because when his parents die He's going to be rich Imagine that my mother his grandmother flipped out when he said that but that's the mindset of many entitled kids today Man, can you think of a better reason why I want to live 3000 miles away from that mess? And I understand i've heard stories at least that there's one like him in every family

[23:00] Oh and the saga continues his mother. My sister is kind of a prepper She had a nice gold coin collection and one day it went missing He took it and spent it all now as for me I could see early on this kid was going to be trouble In fact when I popped back to chicago for a visit for two weeks, and I think it was 1999 I got invited to a birthday party and that kid my nephew was about six years old at the time was jumping up and Down on a glass end table and I yelled at him because if he'd have broken the thing, man Somebody would surely have had to go into the emergency room Well, I yelled at him and made him cry and my sister came over got in my face read me the riot act And said I had no business yelling at her kids I have no business disciplining kids at all because I don't have any after that. She didn't talk to me for two years So anyway, he grew up, but he really didn't grow up

[23:48] 26 years old in a mess. I thought maybe he's on drugs My sister got mad when I recently asked her that question. I said are you sure he's not on anything? Now remember, this is a guy who wrecked three cars and my sister's emphatically said no But you know how kids lie to their parents especially when it comes to substance abuse, right? Anyway, I said what about prescription drugs? She said yeah, he's on some prescription stuff, but no more than the next guy Most millennials are she said of course that makes everything all right Anyway, here's a list of what he takes. That's no more than the next guy 50 milligrams of vienece for ADHD he's taken four milligrams of on don citron hydrochloride for nausea He's taken 60 milligrams of duloxetine hydrochloride, which is a generic for cymbalta for anxiety and depression

[24:39] Doesn't that sound strange? How could you be anxious and depressed at the same time? He's also taken two milligrams of amblify Which is an anxiety and depression drug and he takes clonopin One milligram as needed for anxiety and depression. That's three drugs for anxiety and depression Meanwhile, my sister says he's not taking any more prescription drugs than the next 26 year old. Meanwhile here in latin america I don't know of a single teenager kid or young adult. That's on any prescription medicine at all None and if you talk to a latin pharmacist, they'll tell you they do stock those drugs and the only people taking them Are drum roll, please the entitled latino kids of the upper middle classes and wealthy In other words the screwed up entitled kids of extreme gringle wannabes We're talking about kids that go to high-end bilingual private schools

[25:26] Hmm think we can draw some conclusions here. Good thing They only make up around two percent of the latin population that reminds me of an i triple e meeting I once went to in chicago right before I came down here to latin america. So that was a long time ago The i triple e is a professional engineer society. It stands for the institute of electrical and electronic engineers Anyway, there are about a hundred of us engineers in the room and the speaker said you guys are all successes Raise your hand all of you who could retire right now and more than half the people raise their hands Then one guy yelled out. I could have retired years ago, but i'm putting three kids through college Then the speaker said raise your hand if you could be retired right now But you have to keep working to put your kids through college about 80 raise their hands Then he said raise your hands all of you who had parents who paid your way through college

[26:14] Only about five hands out of a hundred went up Then he said oh then that must mean you either got a full boat scholarship or you worked your way through college, huh? Then he said sarcastically my how we've suffered Then he said raise your hand if you worked or were holding down a job when you were going to college yourself About three quarters of the room raised their hands then he said once again My how we've suffered to get where we are today Then he said I bet you guys out there who have kids in college Don't let them work because you wouldn't want to subject them to the horrors You had to go through to get to where you are today After all it might interfere with their studies or party time Then he said it's good to know that your kids are not at all following in the footsteps of their very successful parents Then he said, you know, this is a very interesting social experiment. You're involved in I wonder how it's going to turn out though

[27:05] I have some idea Then he said one last question. How many of you successful engineers? Bought your kid a car in high school or college and about 90 percent of the people raised their hands Then he said I think you know what the next question is going to be How many of you had parents who bought you a car and about five out of that hundred engineers raised their hands? Then he said my my how you guys have suffered for your successes You've been listening to the expat files living in latin. America If you need some help with your own plan b we can schedule a one-on-one phone or skype consult Just send me an email the expat files at gmail.com And if you want to get on the waiting list for my next week long expat insider seminar in central america Where you're guaranteed to get a two to five year head start on your plan b send me an email the expat files at gmail.com

[27:57] nos vamos