Episode Summary
In this episode of The Expat Files, Johnny Mueller provides an honest and unfiltered view of living, working, playing, and retiring in Latin America. He critiques the overly positive and commercialized portrayals often found in travel magazines and websites, emphasizing the importance of preparation for expats. Johnny shares his personal experience of moving to Latin America with minimal Spanish skills, highlighting the challenges he faced and the importance of building basic Spanish vocabulary before arriving. He suggests expats create bilingual grocery lists to help with communication, but acknowledges that this method doesn't fully prepare them for the complexities of spoken Spanish, including slang and regional variations. He also notes that expats often struggle with understanding native speakers, even those who have lived in the region for years.
Johnny then discusses the concept of 'Spanish overload and fatigue' that expats often experience in the early stages of living in Spanish-speaking countries. He describes the 'ta-da moment' when an expat suddenly understands Spanish without effort, often happening during everyday situations like walking down the street or reading the newspaper. He emphasizes that this moment is a sign of conquering Spanish, as the brain automatically translates without conscious effort. Johnny also highlights the challenges of reading newspapers due to informal language and slang, such as the suffixes 'ita' and 'ito' used to denote smallness or endearment. He provides examples of these suffixes and explains their cultural significance, noting that calling someone 'gordo' or 'gorda' is not an insult in Latin America, but rather a term of endearment.
Johnny continues by discussing how Spanish uses diminutives like 'ito' and 'ita' to express familiarity and affection, using examples like 'flaco' and 'gordo' for Laurel and Hardy. He explains how these diminutives are used within families and in casual conversations, and how they signal friendliness. He also shares his personal experience of learning Spanish by reading newspapers and interacting with locals, emphasizing that context and real-life interaction are more effective than dictionary lookups. He notes that even after years of living in Spanish-speaking countries, many words remain unfamiliar, but context helps in understanding the general meaning.
The episode then shifts to a discussion about the limitations of expats' language skills, noting that they can be understood by those they regularly interact with but not by others. Johnny shares his personal experience of becoming overconfident in his Spanish after a year in Costa Rica, only to realize his limitations when traveling to Panama. He highlights how expats often develop a form of 'pidgin' Spanish that is understood by their local friends but not by others. He contrasts this with the ability of expats to understand the broken English of local shopkeepers, illustrating the importance of consistent interaction for language comprehension. The segment then shifts to a broader discussion about the unpreparedness of first-world citizens for natural and financial disasters, using examples like the housing crisis, Katrina, and Fukushima to argue that governments are unlikely to provide effective support during such events. Johnny concludes by contrasting the resilience and cooperation of people in Latin America with the potential chaos in the first world during similar crises.
Johnny describes the ongoing challenges of infrastructure in Latin America, particularly in countries like Panama, Belize, and Nicaragua, where roads and bridges are frequently washed out. He highlights the lack of government response to these issues, noting that the government only acts when high-profile individuals or the wealthy complain. Despite this, he praises the resilience of the local people, who take matters into their own hands by repairing roads and bridges. He contrasts this with the situation in the United States, where municipal services are underfunded and road maintenance is often neglected. He provides an example of a small rural bridge being washed out and how the local community quickly organized to create a footpath and re-established a bus route.
Finally, Johnny describes the spontaneous emergence of a rudimentary capitalistic system in Latin America following a natural disaster. He highlights how locals quickly adapt by setting up makeshift markets and temporary infrastructure, such as a one-lane road through a riverbed. Despite the lack of modern equipment, the community collaborates effectively, creating a functional alternative to the damaged bridge. Johnny contrasts this with the first world's reliance on heavy machinery and diesel, suggesting that Latin Americans are more resilient and cooperative during crises. He concludes by recommending Latin America as a place to move due to this resilience and warns about the potential chaos in the first world during similar disasters.
Topics
Introduction to The Expat Files, Honest portrayal of living in Latin America, Preparation for expat life in Latin America, Language challenges for expats, Cultural and linguistic barriers in Latin America, Spanish language learning, Cultural differences in language use, Expat experiences in Spanish-speaking countries, Spanish diminutives, Cultural expressions in language, Learning Spanish through context, Language learning for expats
Chapters
00:00:00 Opening 00:00:13 The Honest View of Living in Latin America 00:00:34 Tips for Expats Before Moving to Latin America 00:01:00 Language Challenges for Expats 00:03:33 Communication Barriers for Expats 00:04:46 Introducing Spanish Overload and Fatigue 00:04:49 The Beginning Stages of Expat Life 00:04:52 The Ta-Da Moment 00:04:56 Understanding Spanish Without Effort 00:04:57 The Moment of Understanding 00:05:01 The Ta-Da Moment in Everyday Situations 00:05:03 The Ta-Da Moment in Public Places 00:05:07 Understanding Conversations in Public 00:09:31 Spanish Diminutives and Familial Affection 00:11:01 Diminutives as a Sign of Friendliness 00:12:21 Learning Spanish Through Context and Newspapers 00:14:02 The Limitations of Language Skills for Expats 00:15:00 The Consequences of Overconfidence in Language Skills 00:16:37 The Unpreparedness of First-World Citizens for Disasters 00:18:30 Infrastructure Challenges in Latin America 00:19:30 The Role of the Wealthy and Politically Connected 00:19:53 Resilience and Self-Reliance of Local Communities 00:21:59 A Case Study of a Bridge Collapse and Community Response 00:23:08 Emergence of a Capitalistic System in Latin America 00:23:22 Local Vendors and Temporary Infrastructure 00:23:57 Creation of a Temporary One-Lane Road 00:25:27 Community Cooperation and Adaptation 00:25:52 Comparison of Infrastructure Repair Methods 00:26:49 Recommendation to Move to Latin America
Transcript
Automatically transcribed from the original recording; names and wording may contain errors.
[00:03] Hi everybody, I'm Johnny Mueller and you're listening to The Expat Files, living in Latin America. The show that tells you what it's really like to live, work, play and or retire in Latin America. I tell it just like it is, not the version they give you in those glossy travel magazines, or the picture they paint for you in those international traveler websites, where they're only trying to sell you something. What's it really like for expats living in Latin America? Well, it's time to take off those rose colored glasses and find out. So let's get started. Now since I did that show a few weeks ago about finding a Spanish translator, I feel I should give some of you expat wannabes up there some little tips on what you might do before you come down here, because I know you probably feel a bit like I did. Just before I came down for the first time, when my Spanish was almost non-existent,
[00:51] I felt like I had to do something or I'd be completely lost. I mean, I wanted to prepare myself at least a little bit before jumping into a completely Spanish speaking world. Since I didn't speak any Spanish at all, except what I could order at Taco Bell. And you don't want to land in a country where you feel like a total fish out of water. So this is what I suggest you do weeks, even months before you decide to come down here for the first time. Now, all of us make lists at one time or another, like grocery lists and to-do lists, and we really organized and we have little lists stuck on our refrigerators. So for all of you guys that are into lists, whether they're on organized little notepads or just pieces of toilet paper or bar napkins, well here's what I suggest you do.
[01:36] When you make those grocery lists, especially the grocery lists, and this should start weeks, even months before you come down. So you make your lists as usual. Now, of course you make your lists in English, but right next to those English words, put the words down in Spanish. Like, for example, eggs, huevos, avocados, aguacates, potatoes, papas, milk, leche. Okay, you get the idea, right? So if you do this for a couple of weeks or months even, sooner or later you're going to have a pretty good Spanish vocabulary. And a basic vocabulary is really all you need the first few times you come down. And of course, if you try that little exercise, it won't help you with sentence construction at all, or grammar, of course. But it's sure going to help you when you go shopping or when you ask around for things. But of course if you do that, that means you're going to have to have a Spanish-English dictionary
[02:21] around or a computer available to translate using Google Translator or whatever. So you'll have to set up a system or a pattern of some kind to get used to doing that. And I suggest you just leave a Spanish dictionary on your kitchen table. But that's not the end of it. After you've done that for a few weeks or a few months, start making your lists in Spanish only. And take that Spanish list down to the grocery store and start picking out your items by reading your own notes in Spanish. You'd be surprised how fast you learned your vocabulary that way. And soon enough, you'll probably be feeling pretty good about yourself and you're Spanish. And you might even get a little big-headed about it. Because you'll certainly know how to order the basics, like bread, eggs, beer, tequila, and pep-te-bismol. Now, once you get down here to Latin America and you've learned some Spanish, whether by hook and crook, absorbing it as you go along from the cleaning lady or people on the street,
[03:10] or merchants or whatever, or you take regular classes, or you have a private tutor, or you do a family immersion program, well it turns out most new expats down here, even those who have a little Spanish under their belt, find that they can usually get their point across when talking to a Spanish person because new first-worlders down here are going to talk in rudimentary, simple, slow, and easy Spanish, kind of like a third-grader talking to his mom or dad. Now the big problem for expats down here, even expats that have been down for some years, like me, well we always have difficulty understanding the people talking to us in Spanish. And it seems we're always wishing people spoke like the newscasters do on the Spanish TV. They enunciate everything nicely, they speak slowly, and use words we're familiar with. But you're not going to find people on the street and the regular daily people who come
[03:58] in contact with speaking like that. So your own communication ability is going to far outstrip your ability to understand what the locals are actually trying to get across to you. Take it from me. Not to mention the fact that every five or ten words or so, depending on who you talk to and what class of people they are, they're going to slip in some local slang that you're just not going to understand. And it'll probably confuse you more than you are already. Some of the slang the people use down here will absolutely make your eyes roll to the back of your head, so you can forget about trying to follow it, unless of course you've been hanging around that particular area of Latin America for a few months or so. Then you might get it. And I've heard expats say time and time again, man you know it's hard work having a long conversation in Spanish. That's what we all say, at least the ones of us that aren't Spanish majors from up in
[04:45] the States. Have you ever heard of Spanish overload and fatigue? That always happens in the beginning stages of an expat's life down here. And you know, eventually for all of us, if you're down here long enough, that ta-da moment comes. You know what I'm talking about, that moment when you finally get it, and you kind of understand almost everything a person's saying to you. Well that special moment just might come when you're walking down the street one day, or you're standing in line at the bakery or in a bank, and you hear two or three people conversing and you actually get it. And you can't believe you're actually understanding what they're saying without concentrating and getting mental fatigue over it. And you might not even be looking at them, you're just hearing the words go by, and your brain is doing the translating and you can't believe it. Ta-da! And that my friends, is the moment you know you've conquered Spanish.
[05:31] Or at least your brain has figured out to do the translations automatically without you thinking about it. And depending on the person and how much previous Spanish you've had in school, that ta-da moment could happen when you're down here three months, six months, or even five years. Or maybe never if you live in a high-volume tourist area like Costa Rica or Cancun. And that's not the only ta-da moment you're gonna have. You're gonna have one of those moments while you're reading the newspaper too. And I always recommend reading at least one big morning newspaper, and the best place to start is always the classified section. Anyway, there's that certain moment too when you're reading the newspaper, and you know how that ta-da moment usually happens is like this. You've been trying to slog through some articles or the classifieds or whatever, and you grasp certain sentences and others don't make sense at all. And when you look up some of the words you don't get, they're not even in the dictionary.
[06:17] That's how it usually goes when you first start reading the newspaper well before the ta-da moment ever takes place. Because the newspapers in any particular country down here do not write articles as grammatically correct as your Spanish teacher would write them. And they shove in some slang and some colloquialisms that you're never gonna find in the dictionary. And here's a great example, and you'll never find this in the dictionary, but they use it everywhere. And I guarantee you it'll come up in conversation, in television programs, and on the printed page multiple times each day. And those are the two little suffixes that Spanish-speaking people add on to the end of the words like crazy. Now I'm talking specifically about the added-on word endings, the endings ita, ita, and ito. Ito. Now they're really the same ending, only one is feminine and one is masculine, depending
[07:05] if the word you're adding it to is feminine or masculine. And I won't go into the masculine or feminine thing, but you have to know that every noun is designated either masculine or feminine. And if you screw up the masculine or feminine ending like all new expats do, as well as everyone who picks Spanish as a second language, if you get it wrong, everybody gets the meaning, so don't worry about it. But I'd like to talk about this ito and ita thing as a great example of something you can't get a translation for in a dictionary, but you'll hear it and read it 20 times a day. So you add one of those words to a noun like kitchen, cocina in Spanish. Now a Spanish speaker will say cocinita if he's got a small kitchen. Because the ita or ito added to the end of the word means it's small or little. Like for example a car, carito means a little car.
[07:51] So now you're thinking hey that's easy, you add ito to something and it means small or ita if it's a feminine object. Okay, so far so good right? It turns out that ita and ito are also terms of endearment. For example if someone is fat in your family, which is gordo in Spanish, if you say for example my brother is gordo that just means he's fat. But if you say mi hermano gordito it basically means my lovely little fat brother. Just because you added the ito to the end of the word gordo, gordito. And by the way calling someone fatty down here in Latin America is not an insult at all. For example if you're in a restaurant and someone says hey call the waiter over and you say which one is the waiter and someone might say that fat one over there, gordo.
[08:38] And the person you asked about that will say right out loud hey gordo hey fatty come here. And the fat guy will answer to that name with a smile, fatty without any insult taken whatsoever. Now imagine that up in the first world if you said to the waiter hey fatty come here. You're asking for a bust in the chops aren't ya? I mean we all know a person's weight is a terribly sensitive subject and if you were to call a girl fatty to her face or refer to a girl as fat, up in the first world it'd be like stabbing her in the eye and she'd probably end up on Prozac. But down here in Latin America if you refer to a girl as gorda, which means fat woman, there's no offense taken. And within her family and social group they'll call her gordita, they'll add the ita onto it which is a term of endearment.
[09:25] And even if later in life she gets really skinny they'll still call her gordita because it's become her nickname. Now if you're skinny you're flaco if you're a man and you're flaca if you're a woman. And they'll throw that term around like crazy too. But if someone in the immediate family is skinny they'll add that ita or ito onto it. In other words they'll say flakito or flakita. Again as a familial term of endearment. And just as an aside here, for all you listeners old enough to remember Laurel and Hardy, you know Stan Laurel, the skinny one, and Oliver Hardy, the real fat one with the Hitler mustache. And down here if you happen to catch one of those old movies in Spanish, those guys are billed as flaco and gordo. And not Laurel and Hardy as the rest of the world knows them. I guess I mean the rest of the world that's over 50 years old, I guess.
[10:12] Well that was just to give you another idea of how flexible some Spanish words are. Now this ito and ita thing shows up all over the place. For example every family has at least one Juan in it, which means John of course. And within the family they'll talk about John or Juan as Juanito. And outside of the family people that aren't close to him will just call him Juan. Again the ito bit here is a term of endearment. Instead of Juan, Juanito. Not to be confused with Juanita, which is the female ending ita, and of course is a girl's name, even up in the first world. And what's even more confusing is they'll say Juanito for Junior if there's two Juans in the family. The second one, the smaller one, is Juanito, even if he's 70 years old. Which shows how a simple language like Spanish can really get a bit tricky unless you know
[10:59] the rules and some of the slang. Now here's another very interesting thing that happens when an expat talks to a local in Spanish. First the Spanish person who doesn't know you yet, will speak in regular straight forward Spanish with of course a few slang words thrown in because they just can't help it. But as you start talking to him a while and you get to know him a little bit more even on that very first encounter, suddenly they'll start throwing in a lot of itos and itos into a conversation that didn't have any of them in before. Like for example if you're sitting in a long taxi ride and you're stuck with a cabbie for a half an hour or so, as you start conversing with him he'll start throwing in the itos and the itos. Instead of saying, have you had your lunch yet? Lunch in Spanish being el morso, he'll say, did you have your almorcito? Which technically should mean your little or small lunch.
[11:46] But in reality he doesn't mean that at all, he's just trying to get a little more friendly with you. Because the more itos and itos he sticks in his conversation, the more you know that he's warming up to you or he's trying to warm up to you. And there's usually no falseness or pretentiousness in this at all. They're really trying to be nice and friendly to you. And not so square and business-like. And why not? And then the cab driver might even hand you the morning paper that's sitting on his front seat and say, would you like to see the paper? And newspaper in Spanish is prensa. Though if he's trying to get really friendly with you he'll say, prensita. And getting back to my point, that's why I say folks, as you're reading the newspaper you're going to find these little twists and turns of the language all over the place. And a lot of these things you just can't look up because they're not in the dictionaries. So like I said before, when you're down here a while, after a few months maybe, you should
[12:33] try to do what most expats do. They read the morning newspaper, at least small sections of it, to try to get a handle on what's happening in the local area and of course to help their Spanish along. Well, you'll get that aha moment again when suddenly you'll start getting the gist of whole paragraphs. And even though there'll always be a few words you don't quite understand, even after you've been down here 10 years or so, and I'm proof of that, well it turns out that even with those words you don't quite understand, the vast majority of those words you'll be able to figure out from context, or you just may understand the root of the word, though the prefix and the suffix are completely confusing. It doesn't matter, you still get the general concept. And you know you've really hit your stride when you're reading the paper and you don't have to go back and read the same paragraph two or three times to figure out what really happened.
[13:19] And I can tell you from me, I spent the first three months down here, every morning with a pocket dictionary and a newspaper, looking up words I didn't understand, and finding that it was pretty much futile, so don't do that, because you'll find that more than half of the words that you look up won't even be in the dictionary. In fact I used to make long lists of words that I found in the newspaper that I couldn't find in the dictionary, and I'd show them to some of my Spanish speaking friends down here, and I felt as if I was making a pest out of myself. But eventually the combination of reading the morning paper, or trying to read it anyway, and talking to the locals on the street, as well as the gardener and the bank teller and the guy at the grocery store, eventually your brain goes on automatic and you actually start understanding things without much effort. And how do you know you've really made it with the Spanish language? You could be speaking it like a real klutz, and everybody around you is just patronizing
[14:07] you. How do you know that's not true? Well here's an interesting thing for you, the people around you, the ones that you hang with and you get to see a lot, no matter how bad your Spanish is, they'll start picking up on the way you destroy and distort their language, because eventually you'll repeat your own bad grammar so often that they'll get it, and you'll find that you have no problem at all communicating with them and them understanding you. But you'll only be fluent within that little circle, with those people familiar with your bad linguistic habits. And that's where I became overconfident myself and was thrown for a loop, and that was after I developed some kind of confidence with the people I knew that I was able to get my point across to them, with no problem. At least for me, I thought I was achieving some real success, I even was getting along pretty well in the market, and the bank, and at the malls, and with all the waiters
[14:53] and waitresses. Well I got a bit overconfident and patted myself on the back, thinking I had pretty much conquered my Spanish after being down here about a year. Then I took a little trip from Costa Rica to Panama with my girlfriend, and I found out that those Panamanians didn't understand me at all. And my girlfriend had to do all the translating, even though she didn't speak a lick of English, she understood my version of Spanish quite well enough to know exactly what I was saying, because she was used to the way I mangled the language. I guess I invented my own kind of pidgin Spanish in that first year, and I know a lot of expats who've done exactly the same thing. Their friends and family down here in Latin America have learned to figure out their bad Spanish just the same way that you understand the bad English of the Korean 7-Eleven owner down the street, and you'll find that's true if you keep going back to the same place,
[15:38] over and over, and keep talking to the same guy, and listening to his screwed up version of English, and buying things repeatedly. After a while, you pretty much completely understand his bad English, but if you bring someone else with you into the store for the very first time, the native English speaker that you brought in might not pick up on half of what that Korean guy's talking about, but you will because you know all the guys' quirks. So I'm sure you can understand the problem here. If you don't make a habit of reading the daily paper and getting out with the common people, you might never develop a broad base of Spanish and that Spanish slang that you're gonna need to really understand what the people are saying down here. And though if your Spanish is very basic and rudimentary, you'll always be able to get your point across because of the basic words everybody knows. But obviously, you're gonna want to understand what people are saying to you, and I'm talking
[16:24] about people from all walks of life and in different Latin American countries, and that to me has always been the hardest part of Spanish, not the speaking of it, but the act of trying to understand what everyone else is saying. Okay, now let's go on to something else. Now a lot of people up in the first world know that bad times are coming, and for some, they're here already. Just look at the housing default rates, and people who lost half their pensions or even more in the dot-com bubble disaster and the banking crisis. And look how first world governments respond. They create and spend more money and make things even worse. And look what happens when there's national disasters like Katrina and the Gulf Oil spill. And that's not just in the United States, look at Fukushima. So while you first worlders up there are waiting for the next big disaster, or cascade of disasters, natural, financial, or otherwise, just think about how unprepared you really are at your
[17:13] own homestead. And what would you do if you didn't have water for two or three days, your main road was washed out and you couldn't get to the store, or your electricity went out for a week? Well, one thing you know for sure, when you make a phone call to your local government agency, even if you do get through the line, which you probably won't, if it's a big natural disaster like flooding or a hurricane, you've really got no one to depend on but yourself and maybe a few close neighbors. Which means, after about two days with no electricity, and that means no water because the pumps won't be working, you're gonna panic. How will first world governments respond to big national emergencies? I hate to say it, but I'm sure they'll contribute to the chaos. But you know, the United States and Europe haven't seen any real international crises like that yet. Though, of course, there have been regional ones like Three Mile Island and Katrina, minor
[17:59] earthquakes and such. Well, I've been thinking about that a lot lately. Because, down here in Latin America, natural disasters, power outages, and water shortages happen all the time, and the people are so used to it, and it's such a way of life that they've not only learned to cope with it, but they cooperate in ways that you just can't imagine would happen up in the first world under similar conditions. For example, I've been down here in Central America for the last few weeks, and they've had three huge tropical depressions, basically hurricanes, whipping Honduras, Mexico, Salvador, Panama, Belize, and Nicaragua for days and days on end with no let up in sight. In some places, there are roads and bridges completely washed out, and it's getting to be so common, it doesn't even surprise you anymore. Just driving around myself, I've seen landslides and houses sliding down hills, and in the
[18:47] last few weeks, I've personally driven in water right up to and beyond the side panels of my car. It's a funny feeling when you're driving around in your nice cozy car, and your feet suddenly get wet. So, what do you do when that happens? Well, you just keep driving, and hope your engine doesn't stall. And the funny thing is that people down here don't even bother calling the government and complaining or asking for help. Not the common man anyway, because they know the government is only going to come in and fix something in a hurry, like a collapsed bridge or a landslide on a road, if they get complaints from high placed people, that is the wealthy connected people and politicians that are being inconvenienced because they drive on that road, or have to cross that broken down bridge when going to and from work or whatever. That's how public works and infrastructure repair gets done down here.
[19:33] It's all about favoritism with the wealthy and the politically connected, and no matter how much the common masses complain, the government won't get around to dealing with them or their complaints until they've satisfied all the whims of the powerful and the connected. And that's how it's always been down here, no matter what you've heard or what you've read. But in a backhanded way, it's turned out to be a good thing. The common people know how to deal with disasters and how to take things into their own hands. To keep society moving. For all their shortcomings, the Latin American people are real survivors. Down here, when the potholes in the roads get way too huge, a neighborhood group of guys will go out there with shovels and picks and fill in those holes with rocks. And when a tourist or a visitor or a new expat drives by and sees a road repair crew like that, well let me give you a little clue, if they don't have some kind of a uniform
[20:20] on or matching t-shirts, they're not government road workers at all doing maintenance. They're local people who know it's time to get out the shovels and the picks because the potholes are damaging vehicles and causing local bottlenecks and breakdowns. Now I ask you guys up north, would you ever get your neighbors together, grab some picks and shovels and start filling potholes in your neighborhood? I don't think I've ever heard a story of anyone ever doing that up north. Oh and I'm sure in your town, if there is a pothole in front of your house, you'll end up calling the city road crews or the municipal maintenance department and eventually someone does come, but what happens when they don't? Because that's what you're facing up north, huge cuts in municipal services. Because basically, most cities, counties and states are dead broke. And all city governments are talking about layoffs and early retirement for their employees.
[21:09] So where does that leave basic road maintenance? On the bottom of the priority list. And you can bet on that, and that's just one example of what you can look forward to. In contrast, down here in Latin America, and though the roads are often bad and just peppered with potholes, when those potholes do get to a certain point, the neighbors act and fix it themselves. They have to, because there's no one else to do it. And here's another example of something I saw just last week. A small rural bridge was washed out on a county highway through the mountains that did get quite a bit of traffic because it connects one small town to the other. And it's the only direct road between those two small towns of maybe 5 or 10,000 population. And though there are other auxiliary roads to get from one town to the other, if you can't take that main road going over that bridge, you have to go about 5 kilometers
[21:56] out of your way, which is about 3 and a half miles. So here's what happened. The first day that bridge got washed out, the traffic backed up about half a mile on either end. And after about 4 to 6 hours of that, some of the local male teenagers and adults started gathering rocks and boulders and piling them into the water until there was an actual footpath so people could walk from one side of the bank to the other, without getting their feet wet of course. And the river was only about 20 feet wide, so it didn't take long, maybe 3 or 4 hours, for them to pile up enough rocks so people could walk quite nicely from one end to the other. And during that time, while these guys were working on it, and remember they're the locals, not the government people at all, anyway the buses that normally took that route, couldn't pass either obviously if the bridge is out, they got together and made a deal, and one
[22:43] bus would drive the people from one of those little towns all the way to the bridge, drop that load of people off. The people would take that makeshift footpath across, where there'd be another bus waiting and they'd get on that bus and they'd be taken directly to the other little town. So after about 8 or 10 hours of the bridge being out, they already had re-established the bus line, only you had to walk on the little path to get to the bus waiting on the other side. Meanwhile, that kind of rudimentary capitalistic system sprung into being. And now there's kids selling cokes and cotton candy and peanuts and mangoes and papayas and jocotes, man you should try those jocotes, I know you've probably never seen or tasted one, but they're out of this world, and they're a fruit by the way. Anyway all of a sudden there's kids selling Cheetos and Doritos and ladies with baskets
[23:29] on their heads selling tortillas and corn bread, you name it. Down here in Latin America, anywhere there's a bottleneck like that, little groups of opportunistic vendors creep in to make some money off of the stranded people. And it took about 3 days for the government workers to actually get there with their little matching t-shirts and a few signs saying men at work, that's how you can tell they're from the government. Anyway, they ended up doing even more of what the locals had been doing, which was putting rocks down in the riverbed until they've actually made a one way road out of rocks, and now you didn't go over the bridge with your car or your bus or your truck, not anymore. Now you slope down the bank over the rocks and up the bank the other side and back onto the road again. And the bridge, well they just left it as it was, with part of it washed completely out. And I suppose they'll get back to repairing it like it should be, in a few months or so,
[24:17] but meanwhile, that is if some important shaker or mover or politician gets the ball rolling again, they might bring in the heavy equipment. But meanwhile there's a temporary one lane road down through the riverbed, which is perfectly adequate for everyone, except it's one lane, so there's a cop posted there waving people through from one direction for a while, then he stops that line and starts waving people from the other direction, which causes a nice bottleneck which lasts about 10 minutes if you're going that way, but it has created a little capitalistic nexus for local people walking from car to car trying to sell stuff to you. And believe it or not, after a week or so, the sellers get kind of sophisticated, especially when you consider that about a week before, there was nothing there but a bridge and some mountains. Now when you get stuck in line there, you can buy cell phone pouches, batteries, sunglasses,
[25:04] Jesus and Mary stickers for your car, even decals of Playboy bunnies and girls in bikinis, with the same guys selling both the Jesus and the sex stuff. Go figure. But you see the point I'm trying to make here is that Latin Americans are so used to the occasional natural disaster or trauma, that as soon as something like that does happen, the whole population kind of shifts into a different gear, and though they don't have all the modern equipment like we have up in the first world, they get their picks and shovels and wheelbarrows and they put their backs into it, and eventually things are working again. Maybe I'd only have speed but they are working again, not at a dead standstill, like so many people expect will happen when a big national or financial disaster hits up in the first world and it's only a matter of time. Because like I said, these guys down here use picks, shovels and wheelbarrows, whereas
[25:52] up north in the first world, infrastructures get repaired with caterpillar tractors worth a couple of hundred thousand dollars, and bobcats and case 580 backhoes, and all of those of course run on diesel. So what happens when the fuel supply runs short? But even if you do have a pick, a shovel and a wheelbarrow in your garage, good luck trying to get any young kid interested in doing anything physical these days. Just try tearing him away from his computer or his text messaging and you'll see what I mean. Who knows, maybe when a national disaster comes up north and the grid goes down and the smart phones go down and the internet goes down and cable TV goes out, maybe then the neighbors will get together and cooperate. But don't bet on it, more likely up there, it'll be every man for himself. Like during Hurricane Katrina, where thousands of people stayed holed up in their houses
[26:39] with shotguns, standing guard against looters intent on stealing their big screen TV sets. So anyway, the fact that Latin Americans know how to cooperate during a disaster, and they know just how to spring into action, well that's reason 2476 why I recommend moving to Latin America. And if the message is still not quite sinking into your head, imagine a day in the near future when you go to the ATM machine and no money comes out. Because either the power is out or the bank system is down. Now you could stand there confused and push your card in and out all day, but nothing will happen. Then the line is going to build behind you, probably to a half a block long, before you start thinking about going to another ATM machine and when you get there that one's not working either. Now that's when the panic is going to set in.
[27:24] But when something like that happens down here in Latin America, there's only a tiny glitch since so few people depend on ATMs down here. You've been listening to The Exped Files, living in Latin America. And don't forget you can email me on anything at all about Latin America. The Exped Files at gmail.com. That's The Exped Files at gmail.com. See you next time. Nos vemos.