#1250 – The Expat Files: Language, Culture, and Current Events in Latin America

Automatically transcribed from the original recording; names and wording may contain errors.

[00:00] South of the border down Mexico way That's where I fell in love when the stars above came out to play and now as I wonder Hello there all you ex-pad wannabes. I'm Johnny Mueller and you're listening to the expat files living in Latin America The show that tells you just what it's like to live work play and or retire down here in Latin America It's a mix of the good the bad the ugly and the great and it's all right here. So let's get started Lots of interesting emails today. Let's roll now you longtime listeners No, I've got many many people named Dave who listen to this show many people named Dave who like to write me emails, too So today being that it's a special day part of International Dave week

[00:48] We'll start out with an email from the original Dave Dave number one who came to one of my very first expat insider seminars By the way, he happens to be an English teacher and a private English tutor also So it's naturally he has a comment about one of my previous shows where I mentioned I can't stand the word like how people overuse the hell out of it as an adjective That is as a verb. It's fine as an adjective. No dice Anyway, he says I too am very annoyed when people randomly insert the word like into their speech However, the word like has been replaced by an even worse nonsense filler word And that word is literally Dave says people use it as a nonsense filler word and they think it makes them sound smart But it doesn't like for example, I literally woke up at 6 this morning

[01:39] He says I mean really is there a figurative poetic or metaphoric expression about waking up at 6 in the morning Nope, there is not so don't say literally please or About this one. I literally died of embarrassment. Nope. No, you didn't unless you're a ghost Then Dave says my Nicaraguan girlfriend who only speaks Spanish once said literal mente as a word filler That's of course the Spanish version of the word literal. She used it as a filler word. I asked her not to say that God, I hope that literal poison doesn't start infecting the Spanish language, too Alright me Johnny with my literal two cents Sorry to tell you Dave, but it has started to infect the Spanish language. I hear people say it occasionally to let that I'll mente

[02:28] There's another filler word or phrase that seems to come up all the time here in Spanish to its in serio Which literally means ha ha are you serious or just seriously? It's actually two words in serio. I think you can tell the word serio means serious or seriously You know Latinos are starting to say that all the time. I hear it everywhere in serio It's a little bit stronger than saying something like really or in Spanish for that which means right or real mente asked as a question real mente, which means is that right or Technically is that real? Because the Spanish word real mente has the English word real in it, you know being real

[03:14] Anyway, when someone says in serio, they usually have an inflection in their voice Which means they're a bit surprised or concerned or excited like for example If a Latino guy says to his latina girlfriend on a date, why don't you pay for dinner this time? She'll say in serio Of course that'll never happen. This is Latin America You know it still runs under those og rules of you know a guy being a caballero That's a gentleman when you take a girl out of date You open doors for get out of the car or off your motorcycle or out of the chicken bus Walk up to the girls front door and actually call on her No texting like I'm here. Come on out or beep in the horn here in Latin America That's considered rude and Latin guys always pay for the dinner date because you see down here chivalry is not dead

[04:05] At least not yet. It's got a long long lag time and I'm glad about that I understand up in the States. It's a lost art though I have to admit down here in Latin America the chivalry and gentlemanly attitude you often see Goes hand-in-hand with rampant cheating on wives and girlfriends Yep, Latin America is full of hypocrisies and contradictions, but then again, the first world's got a 50% divorce rate. So go figure But I digress don't I always? So anyway Dave your fears are justified the word literal mente, which is literally in Spanish Is creeping into the lexica and be on the lookout for phrases like and Sadio Anyway after Dave says in his email, I hope that poisonous word doesn't infect the Spanish language

[04:52] he says I hear that even some dictionaries are Accepting this incorrect use of the word to which I say if people keep misusing that word literally There'll be literally no words anymore that literally mean literal and along the way. We'll have lost a nice Nominally descriptive word with the life and meaning rung out of it from overuse Then he says now Johnny I listen to another podcast not yours where the host frequently misuses that word again Literally, he even once mentioned to a guest that it's a common word amongst Millennials Yet he uses it more than any of the 20-somethings. I work with and he's a boomer so I guess this horrible misuse of the word knows no demographic boundaries and Finally Dave number one says I remember well your aversion to using the word awesome to mean cool or interesting

[05:44] I personally try to avoid it, and I don't think I've ever used it in your company However, it is difficult sometimes given my Southern California upbringing PS I Saw it Ringo star on tour last night. He's the most agile 82 year old man. I've ever seen He had no problem coming down quickly from the drum riser to the microphone and back again For two hours. What do you think Johnny signed Dave the original Dave Dave number one? All right, Dave. Thanks for that By the way, Dave's a drummer So he's got a critical eye for good drummers like Ringo star who may not be the best drummer in the world by any means But the guy was a massive trendsetter and pioneer in the rock and roll drum arena Seems like every good drummer that came slightly after him say he was a massive influence in role model

[06:33] Even if their styles seemingly have nothing in common with his for example John Bottom of the Zeppelin or Ginger Baker or Hendrix's drummer Mitch Mitchell They all name Ringo as their influence and role model thing is way back when he got Thousands of kids interested in playing the drums to the chagrin of their parents, of course I remember when I was young there was a kid on every block You'd want to beat the shit out of because he'd make non-stop racket Banging on that shiny new drum set most with obvious lack of talent In fact, I remember a young guy who lived a couple doors down from me. He worked at Ludwig drums You know, Ludwig drums are the ones that Ringo used all his life. The Ludwig factory was in Chicago I think it still is and because of that cache that guy his name was Rick de Bella

[07:20] Had such a coolness factor in the neighborhood He was the local star simply because he got to hang with Ringo a few times at the Ludwig plant Anyway to prove to you. I'm not the happy-go-lucky guy. You think I am There's one thing I cannot stand about Ringo Starr Every time you see him in the press or doing an interview He flashes the peace sign and I'm thinking to me. That's one of the worst cliches that came out of the 60s that damn peace sign That worked well, didn't it considering since then back in the 60s the United States has been in Multiple continuous wars the US has been in a constant state of war all of them Instigated by the good old USA or should I say specifically the psychopaths at the CIA? But you knew that already, right? So my advice Ringo that peace sign packet in bro

[08:10] It's old and moldy and like you Ringo lost its relevance 50 years ago just saying Alright moving on and in honor of national Dave week comes his email from the Dave pile Dave says hi, Johnny Sally from Muskego, Wisconsin wrote in with restless eye syndrome in your last episode I'm right in her backyard in McQuanago, Wisconsin What a coincidence. How do you like that? Who knows he says this may be the start of an expat wannabe club in the area Maybe we'll put together a bowling team that pines to get out of the states and we'll meet over brandy old-fashions at a Friday fish fry Alright Dave I get it Johnny here You know I have lots of friends and relatives up in Wisconsin and when I'd go up there on weekends to visit

[08:56] When I'd go fishing up by Madison or the Wisconsin Dells area. I sure remember those Friday fish fries at local bars where they always had a big jar of Giant kosher dill pickles and a giant jar of pickled pigs feet on the counter I just couldn't look at them too long. They were so gross the hoofs the bleached white skin the fat I often wondered if anyone actually ate those things. I certainly never did man. They were gross looking Anyhow, it seems like every kid in Chicago had a relative up in Wisconsin and they'd go visit and have those same kind of experiences Yep, I remember going to Muskego Beach a sort of rickety old amusement park I remember riding the amphibious mechanical ducks at Wisconsin Dells going to Paul Bunyan's pancake house

[09:42] Going deer hunting and getting nothing going duck hunting and getting nothing I remember going to the discos in Lake Geneva, Wisconsin Watching all the rich entitled girls dance with the rich entitled guys as normal guys had no chance I even once went on a tour of Taliesin as Frank Lloyd Wright's original home and studio in Wisconsin That was a real cool trip But I digress. Sorry about that This is a show about the good the bad the ugly and the great in Latin America. So let's move on Continuing on with Dave from McWannico, Wisconsin's email He says Johnny while I personally don't have any restless anything syndromes to share with you I do have a relevant observation for you Dave says the family and I got back from a week-long Disney cruise from Miami to Cozumel, Mexico last January

[10:32] Of course to say Cozumel is visiting Mexico is a little like saying you've seen the us after visiting Wisconsin Dells. Wow, Dave even mentions Wisconsin Dells. How about that? Anyway, he says fair enough We had some drinks on that cruise Let the kids run around the ship and Cozumel and I bought a cheap counterfeit Rolex for fun Here's the punch line I was astonished that both on the way there and on the way back through the Florida Straits That's the area between the southernmost tip of Florida and Cuba. We intercepted Cuban immigrants floating around on the ocean some 40 miles away from Havana He says it must be some maritime law that states any vessel has to assist the us coast guard

[11:17] In detaining people like these who they encounter on the high seas So what happened was all the cruise ships and barges in the area that spotted these guys Hung around and converged on them till the us coast guard showed up Dave says on the first pass through we encountered a small motorboat carrying about a dozen refugees Obviously, they knew the drill They wanted nothing to do with us knowing they would be held by authorities and sent back if we spotted them But our ship along with two other cruise ships in a barge in the area surrounded them over a span of a few miles Until the us coast guard came to pick them up Then Dave says on the way back we encountered a second group of floaters This time in a non-motorized raft with an improvised sail

[12:04] It came rolling along with another dozen people packed into it Unlike the first group they wanted to be rescued. I imagine they were dehydrated and burning up in the sun Since the night before had been windy and if we could feel it on the ship and we did Then the overnight experience for them on that raft would have been hellish And that got me thinking if you were to devise a way to crush a human soul in the most fantastic way possible Could you make up a better scenario? Imagine you lived under an oppressive regime for decades scraping your savings together So you and a dozen others could hire a coyote to take you across the ocean on a barely seaworthy aluminum fishing boat I can imagine there are tough decisions to be made You can't bring enough fuel and have enough water for everyone because of the weight in space

[12:52] So you'll just have to white knuckle it and handle the dehydration for half the trip So then after weeks of planning and gathering supplies you set out on that harrowing 90 mile trip to miami Excuse me my jammy Then about halfway through a group of fat happy rich gringos arrive on a floating skyscraper with dancing cartoon characters prancing about Meanwhile their big ass floating luxury hotel blocks your path until the coast guard arrives to send you back to cuba where i'm certain As fugitives from a communist state they roll out the red carpet and treat you like returning heroes Meanwhile your raft and all your worldly belongings are gone. They're abandoned left to drift out into the sunset

[13:41] Then as a final kick in the teeth that big old disney ship that intercepted you Blasts this horn which plays the tune When you wish upon a star A fitting end to a tragic nightmare Humanitarian tragedy aside I couldn't resist cracking to my fairly progressive wife I said those poor people. Why would they try to escape that world-class? Socialized health care system that michael moore is always bragging about I don't get it By the way johnny great show as usual keep it up signed dave All right dave very interesting. Thanks for that You know that reminds me of what my dad once said to me He got drafted I think in 1950 did two or three years in the army

[14:29] Actually back then it was called the army air corps He was stationed in germany during the berlin airlift And of course my whole family being of german descent We heard lots of stories from friends and relatives back in germany They said a few years later when they finally built the berlin wall. We've all heard of that, right? When the east german's wondered what it was for They were told by the communist government. They told him it was to keep all the destitute poor impoverished starving westerners From stampeding their way into the east german communist paradise. That was the communist party line That was the reason they gave their own people for years Then in 1989 when the wall came down Statistics show and you know the german's keep fantastic tremendously detailed records Well, it turns out after the berlin wall fell and the new german federation, you know

[15:19] The combined east and west german states got a hold of the stasi files, you know the east german secret police files There were records of tens of thousands of east german's sneaking across that wall somehow and getting to the west Many of them getting shot even killed along the way with not a single case though Of any individual from the west trying to escape in the other direction from the west to the east rather strange Don't you think funny how the western media and the western press who always seem to have nice things to say about Socialism and communism at least these days where so many young americans seem to embrace Socialism even communism check out what's happening on today's u.s Campuses, isn't it funny though how the major media outlets never seem to mention those old berlin wall facts and details

[16:07] All right, moving on comes an email from davide a spanish dave they count right? He says johnny i'm an american born in el salvador. My parents came over when I was five We live in la but in about five more years My parents will be retiring and moving back down to el salvador a move. They thought they'd never do again until of course The country's savior buccally came on Even just three years ago They were talking about eventually having to make a few trips back down to visit some of the relatives They haven't seen in 30 years, but they kept hemming and hawn. They weren't looking forward to the trip at all But man things have changed. They're actually planning on leaving the states and retiring there in five years

[16:53] They bought some land in la libertad and will soon begin building a house Then dave says i'm totally with you johnny on the way the media here in the states Continuously try to bust president buccalaise balls He says for example just this week The la times had on the second page and on the front page of their internet site the terrible news that 153 of buccalaise Criminal gang prisoners have died in that massive jail. He built the news story Obviously planted to make people in the u.s. Hate buccalaise even more make him look like a tyrant But the reality is all my latino friends say the same thing They don't see a problem They see it as a win for the good guys Of course, I know all the human rights agenda guys are made very uncomfortable by buccalaise actions

[17:43] Though the truth is all my latino friends know Most of the deaths if not all of them were gang reprisals not police reprisals Funny how the american press never prints the fact that there are more than four big gangs in el salvador and they're all in Kill each other all the time. So i'm thinking and my latino american friends too that 153 prisoners dead in one year out of 67 000 locked up Is really an unbelievably low number considering they all hate each other and they're fighting all the time and killing each other all the time, too Oh, and the other thing the american media will never tell you when reporting things like that is that the american prison system Has pretty much the same percentage of prison deaths per capita per year

[18:31] But printing a comparative stat like that would be counter productive to the america media agenda Which is to try to discredit buccalaise any way they can Another thing that often comes up when my latino american friends are talking about the subject We know that if these animals were out on the streets far more than 153 of them would be dead by now By the way, johnny before buccalaise gang crackdown in el salvador the murder rate on the streets from the gangs was 30 per day So if you do the math you can see that in 10 days Would be equivalent to the number of people who died in buccalaise prison in one year But does the us press report on that? No It would make buccalaise methods look like a success They wouldn't want that it runs counter to the first world narrative

[19:19] My question is johnny. Why is it that american first world human rights organizations always side with the criminals? Never the victims. I just don't get it Signed david david in los angeles. Well dave once again. Thanks for that The truth is dave. I don't get it either You know speaking of real live boots on the ground stories from el salvador. I'd like to slip in a little email now from one of our non dave emailers But since this is international dave week, we'll just make him an honorary dave for the moment. Okay By the way next week is international butt plug week. So I suspect amazon will be putting on another shift of warehouse workers Anyway, our next emails boots on the ground email from our honorary dave who for the rest of the year goes by richard

[20:10] He says johnny el salvador is amazing. It's just like they say with regard to the buccalaise revolution I got the buccalaise 2024 hat and wore it everywhere to happy nods smiles and positive comments Walking around el salvador. I'm feeling totally safe compared to other latin american countries even places like well quadamala Still seeing a lot of guards with guns, but mostly pistols not shotguns and assault rifles It's easy to travel throughout the country with the ways app too ways Wa ze he said i've really enjoyed my stay here We started in san salvador taking in the central square with the national palace and national cathedral on two sides And the central market down the road and on the opposite side of the park the chinese are building a national library

[21:00] It's an amazing structure Then after days of trying to look at real estate I did get some specs on some apartments for around 250 000 and all had three bedrooms Ended up eating ceviche at almost every meal Next up bitcoin beach driving was no problem with ways We were going to stay at a tommy hotel as one of your contacts suggested But I met a fellow bitcoiner in the hotel bar salvo san salvador lobby a mr Jb who introduced me to the el zante bitcoin elite people the two founders roman martinez and mike peterson All right, me johnny here. Those are the two original bitcoin guys that came down way before buccale

[21:46] Was even elected They were surfer guys from the states who came down and decided to live in el zante The little surfing area and put down roots there Also being early adopter bitcoiners. They spread the gospel of bitcoin That's where it started in el zante All right Then our honorary dave for the day says it seems all the hotels in the area were booked I moved to the only place left in el zante the roca surf Turns out at that very time. There was an international surf competition with 50 nations competing to get in as individuals or teams So we were lucky to get any room at all the surfing competition and venues were excellent though He says I can see surf city can only grow into a major tourist destination

[22:34] I saw personally several of the greatest surfers in the world i.e. john florence and felipe toledio The venue at el tungco the other little surfing town was great for surfing But the town was not for me. It already seems to be on the tourist trail I can see the quality of the surfing areas will always be a huge draw I say give me el zante a few miles west, but it's also popping pretty good now, too Though it seems not as touristy as el tungco, but already million dollar condos are going in I repeat excellent surfing there will always be a great draw Now johnny just so happened. There was also a bitcoin meetup last friday max And stacy were there You know max kyzer. It was amazing to meet him. He spent time with roman also known as chimbera

[23:22] Who showed us around the area and a lot of places to buy again. The area is starting to pop Then he says as I write this we're staying at las flores near el coco surf city, too It's a bitcoiner place called hotel martinez way way off the tourist trail The owners are salvadorian brothers raised in the u.s. Who returned three years ago? It turns out one worked at the four season hotel, which is his inspiration for the place So they came down and started a small boutique surfing resort at ages 22 Yes, they take bitcoin and the food is rather good Especially given that el coco is a pretty small town So how do we wind up there? Well, it's because we've met one of the brothers at the bitcoin meetup

[24:10] I repeat there are lots of surfers from all over the world here again great surf areas and beaches Which will always make it desirable. However, it's like the small towns around lake atitlan in guatemala No atms no big markets to buy things like wine or very nice restaurants, etc We also drove west of el coco to a place called punta mango It's idyllic like the california beaches. I remember from the 60s I would buy anything there, but it all seems word of mouth. That's the only way to find a place He says we will be going back there tomorrow with some determination Then he says unfortunately i'm running out of time, but I went to la union today to see the bitcoin city area It was a drive through pleasant rural farming areas all the way

[24:58] We got to la union in less than an hour and had an amazing seafood lunch at el bahia Right on the gulf of franceca We also drove partially up the conchaga volcano where bitcoin city will be built We didn't see any evidence of development yet of either bitcoin city or the new airport Although a few miles outside la union on the other side of the volcano There were beginnings of housing developments with the entry arches up and pictures of future houses, but that was it He says i'd say the surf area is about one hour from a possible new airport. That'll be a big draw Anyway, johnny. Sorry for the long narrative. Just haven't heard you talk much about that area lately. Oh and Thanks for getting me going on my plan b long ago. All right, mr

[25:44] Areza aka day for a day nice little review there. Don't be sorry at all for the length of your narrative All of that was very informative and good to know In fact, i'd appreciate a follow-up as you get to the end of your trip Oh, and if I remember correctly, I don't think you can speak spanish, right? So when you do check back in let us know how that went how you got along because I know when else albert are Very few people except in those surfing areas speak english Though once a while you will run into someone pumping gas or driving a cab that does speak pretty good english and That usually means the guy was up in the states and got deported sometimes more than once oddly enough though unlike any other latin american country Salvadorians who escaped at one time or another and went to the states are choosing to come back to their home country now Since buccalaise turned things around

[26:30] It's the craziest thing because it's not happening with any other latin country once latinos get to the states They kiss the ground as if they've won the lottery sure. They miss their home country, but they almost never want to go back Not voluntarily anyway Except when it comes to al Salvador Meanwhile first world do-gooders who've never been to salvador called buccalaise tyrant What a bunch of clueless woke fools now if you happen to run into one of those bleeding heart ngo first world do-gooder fools Whining about buccalaise human rights violations in al salvador. Just ask them one question actually two questions. They're easy ones Ask them where all the gangs are now and ask them If they feel safe walking alone at midnight in their own town

[27:17] Because if you ask those two questions to anyone in al salvador, they'll tell you as for question number one They'll say sure I know where the gang members are. They're all in jail As for question number two, they'll tell you of course. I can walk alone at midnight in my own neighborhood. Nothing to be afraid of How about you? You've been listening to the expat files living in latin america If you need some help with your own plan b we can schedule a one-on-one phone or skype consult Send me an email the expat files at gmail.com And if you want to get on the waiting list for my next week long expat insider seminar in central america Where you're guaranteed to get a two to five year head start on your plan b Send me an email the expat files at gmail.com